All Comments on 'Macallan Promises'

That was very well written with believable characters. While reading it was a pleasure, writing it was certainly a labor of love (with emphasis on the labor - producing something that long and that good is very hard work).

Right at the point where the girls talked about being the last of the Macallan's I thought about the fact that their gift would end with the two of them, which is, of course, what I think you intended readers to think about. In the same vein, it wouldn't have taken much in terms of character exposition to give us the point about Molly being a photographer without having to explain it there in the post-script.

All in all, excellent work. Thank you for taking the time to share it.

John

A wonderful tale of love. The sex was scintillating, but almost secondary to the tale. More please!

nicely done!

Éirinn go brách

Ne-Obliviscaris

As per usual for you, another great story, and well written too. I'm not sure I can say much else without simply rehashing what I've already commented for your other stuff.

On the other hand, I'd like to see you write a really bad story, because right now it's looking like that'd be the real challenge for you. :P

This has got to be your best story yet. I haven't read all of your stories yet but those I have read have all been great. Keep on writing.

that. was. awsome:)

not nearly enough decent storylines on here

I have you on my list to check for new postings, and I am never disappointed. You share such lovely people with us. I try to be patient, and am glad when friends I haven't met yet come to visit. Thank you again.

Loved it. Not really sure that I was expecting lesbian sex, but it was great nonetheless. Thanks (:

Aw shucks, I tried to warn you about the girl-girl sex. Frankly though, now that you've got me thinking about it, the only thing better than lesbian sibling incest might be SURPRISE lesbian sibling incest. I like lesbian sibling incest. I also like surprises. I suspect the effects would be additive. I mean, picture turning a corner and blammo, there are two cute sisters snogging away. Alithe, intentionally or not, I think you've helped us stumble onto something here. Anyone else with me? Anyone? P.S. this does not work with bourbon and candy corn. I like 'em both and I've tried combining them. Yick. Xp

A gifted writer if ever their was one. I beautiful story. Well told and with believable characters, I was hooked from the start to the very end. Well done and thank you for a great read.

I love your writing. Period. And I will happily read anything you've written, again and again. Your nickname is a guarantee to me. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't have to tempt us into reading anymore, and neither do you have to put warning spoilers in the top of the story. Spoilers spoil - the Macallan sisters are still hot though. In my limited mind they look a bit like the Peaches-and-Sam combo, and it's not the worst combo to emulate...

You have a good point on the spoiler thing I post up front. I've hesitated over it before. The sad fact is that sexual content is such a touchy point that it overrides my desire to maintain mystery. Nobody wants to get 20 minutes into a story to find out the sex is the kind that sends them shrieking for the hills. It's partly my fault for writing stories in multiple categories. I've got people hoping for more, gentle lesbiany things like "Strawberries & Bubblegum" or "Peaches and Honey." Then there's the ravenous, incesty "Stolen Kisses" and "Words on Skin" crowd. With my warnings up front, I'm caring for the group of readers in there whose interests don't overlap. I want to be respectful. That said, you may have noticed that "Macallan Promises" may bridge those two groups. I respect my readers' preferences but I'm not above trying to influence them. Muhahahah. :D

Is lesbian sibling incest. So hot, and you're an incredible writer. I agree that it is appropriate in the Sci-Fi/Fantasy section, but it is quite clearly incest as well, and those folks that only stick around there would enjoy it. You would definitely get a lot more readers.

Keep it up, I love reading anything you write.

Absolutely wonderful story with great characters and most definitely worth the build-up. So many long stories have a great build up but then are very bland and insipid in the end. But this lacked nothing, great job, i'll make sure you look for more of your work.

This part sussunach thinks that you've done an amazing job writing this story. Although I do think that you could've had a little more Gaelic in there because it has such an important part in the context of the story.

Romantic touching and very sexy. But it was soooo long (just kidding). Actually, I hope you continue at some point with the sister's adventures as they try to get pregnant (maybe something silly involving fairy folk). You're a very good writer.

I use the term story in its broad sense as this had a fine and inventive plot, one of your best. Great job, as always from your pen. Cheers. -- UK CYNIC

I have read absolutely everything you have posted on Lit. You still never cease to amaze me. Please keep writing, You are my favorite author on here and I can't wait for the next story you post, as I'm confident it will be quality. Also, I think you should continue to post the warnings/intros to your stories. Your fan-base can skip them if they want to, but new readers can find them very helpful, I know I did when I first read "Words on Skin".

Thank you for such an amazing story. All of it was riveting! More, please, about these girls and their heritage.

Hopefully this isn't similarly subject to deletion, but my only criticism is...

Not long ENOUGH! :)

My (fantasy) world became perfect after reading "Strawberries & Bubblegum" & then I was sent into the depths of depression and despair after reding the sequel "Saving Berry" I promised never to forgive you!!! ;-).

With this piece, you have achieved redemption in my eyes.

This piece is the perfect storm of Story Line (Literature) & Erotica. The reading of this was a "labor" of love for me.

Thanks for sharing your stories

I've been crying all through the last page. For the record, I'm 50 years old. And a bloke. Everything about this is wonderful.

Loved it! Best story i've read in ANY website, EVER!

Clearly one of the best. Deserving of the number one place in S/F.

I so have to write a story about lesbian sisters now. That was just an unbelievably hot, fascinating relationship; I loved that Tabby idolized her older sister yet held the sexual power in the relationship. That creates some very interesting conflict, so much potential there. Which also goes for the time stopping and the background lore, those are some of the most interesting concepts I've seen in fantasy in a while.

And Molly was sugared? Yes!

Awesome story, maybe your best yet.

Thanks for your kind feedback guys! This category gets less reading than some of the others so I appreciate your support. It offsets the lower reading/voting turnout and totally buoys my spirits.

A special thanks to you, Amontillado. Toldja you'd given me religion on that whole sugar thing. Waxing is so '90's. I've joined the revolution, and the revolution is SWEET! XD

I loved it. And I especially liked the sci-fi aspect. The Macallan thing was pure genius :)

To start with, it was hot as hell, every bit of it was full of sexual tension and erotic undertones.

On a side note, if you removed the erotic parts of it, the back story could easily be the beginning of a great novel that could be a mainstream hit.

Overall, great back story, and erotic as hell!

Thanks so much Anony! That's the best compliment I've gotten on any of my stories so far. As luck would have it, this story IS an offshoot of a novel I'm a little over two-thirds finished. Let's say that Hannah Macallan has a story all her own. For your kind words, I'll dish you the working intro I've got...

"I was born Hannah Macallan of clan Macallan in the Christian year of 642. I kissed the cheek of Brian Boru. I cheered from the streets of Dundalk when its crown was set on Eric the Bruce’s proud head. For two centuries, I scanned the eastern seas off my homeland for invading Normans, standing in the powdery white sands of Brittas Bay beside a True Goddess of Old."

I gathered myself and let the glamour I'd worn for nearly twelve centuries fall. The nervous brown man's eyes widened while sixty years slid away and I stood as the young girl I had remained; eternal youth a wedding gift from my fae husband.

"My point is this -- I have waited twenty lifetimes for a good death. This one will do. Let us see if your god rewards failure shall we?"

**Just a, you know, tease. Xp**

Excellent.. definitely have to make room for you on my favourite authors!

everything was really well done.. right down to the pacing of the story.. just enough foreshadowing to build the anticipation.. even the twist on the last page was an "oh no, I bet I know what's coming" as she started her run.

very satisfying read, and definitely worthy of being published!

This is a great story and I enjoyed it immensely. I'd love to read more about the sisters' adventures in Ireland.

pardon my gaelic but really, runny, slicky, spurty good story.

You made me come, you made me cry, you made me identify. Can't wait for your novel.

This was amazing.

With that sad, this story was very well written, nice pace and your use of language is not overly complex but is classy, the only 2 things I think you could improve on are that the goddes didn't seem that 'wow' like she's supposed to be, probably because of the short amount of dialogue she was given. And the second thing i'd like to say it's that on the 'giving in' scene, it would've been better to make Molly resist a little bit more, not that it wasn't good, but that a little more torture would've made the giving in sweeter.

Well, thanks for such an amazing story and I hope you follow up with more of Molly and Tabitha.

P.S: totally unrelated but I still read 'strawberries and bubblegum' I think you struck an inner cord with that story, and I really like the nickname "Tabs"

I remember your comment on "Bobbie's Lesson." I wasn't fibbing when I said I'd swing back to write a story from Berry's POV. Below is an excerpt as proof that it's in progress. :)

***

It was on our honeymoon, two days after I married Bobbie, that I had a running dream. By that I mean a dream about running. I’d been having them a lot because I was training a ton for my fourth marathon next month. The extra miles had the added perk of slimming me down to the thinnest I’d ever been for my wedding dress.

The running dream that night was a new one though.

I was jogging along on a trail that wound through a flowered meadow. The trail’s dirt was dark and plushy soft and the air was thick and sweet with… flowers? No, something even sweeter. Like candy or… dammit, I knew that smell.

“…?” I heard someone call me.

I couldn’t quite make it out but when I looked around I saw no one. I kept running.

“Berry?” There was the voice again. Clearer now. Dammit, I knew that voice.

“Berry?” it came again.

It was a little louder this time. I stopped and looked down. There was a little chipmunk standing up on a rock. It was the cutest chipmunk I’d ever seen. Wait a minute. Chipmunks don’t have big sky blue eyes. And they don’t usually smile. Or talk.

“C’mon, wake up, Berry.”

I listened to the pretty chipmunk and woke up. And I gasped. In the dark, Heather, my ex-girlfriend and newly-minted sister-in-law was crouched by the bed.

“Bu-bubble?” I stuttered, knuckling sleep from my eyes. “How did you – how come you’re here?”

"I'm here to give you your wedding gift, Berry." She smiled then caught her lower lip between her teeth.

"Oh. Wow." It was all I could say.

***

See? It's gettin' there. Xp

Thanks for answering so quickly! It's comforting to know that some writers take the time to answer their readers. Also, please,please! Leave all other stories for a while and focus on Berry's story! Please?????

I dreaded the final chapter. Your characters felt real, and I wanted no part of either's death. I stopped reading when the yellow ball bounced into the street.

Well, it's tomorrow now, and I just finished the story; I'm glad to see Molly and Tabby alive and together. Great story, beautiful people, and great sex. I'm looking forward to reading more.

Heartwarming. This is simply 'pure love' in a nutshell...with some grade-A steamy sex thrown in. You're easily one of the best authors around. More, please.

>:3

If I said I didn't like it, I would be the biggest liar in history. If I said I loved it, that would have been the understatement of the century. Truly awe-inspiring. 6/5

Superbly done. Bravo!

There are few stories I'll ever say are one of the best, and this is one such. A case where a five just doesn't reach high enough.

If ever there was a love story, this one is it. No blarney, just love.

i feel like i say this to every single story you right.. I WANT MORE.. i sound like an addict eh? o well loved strawberries and bubblegum loved this.. words can't explain it.. i just get so attatched to the characters in such a short time, thanks for giving us what you have and like i said before.. MORE :P

I don't like this sort of story; I loved this story.

Mostly I'm a stoggy old technical writer with little imagination (I didn't pick up on using photography to create moments of magic held in time). Now it's time to change if possible at my age. Thank you!

This is my first and very proud comment on this site, though I've been an avid reader for some time.

This was a work of art. I was quite literally moved to tears throughout the seventh page. The richness and fullness of the girls' history, their family, their dilemmas brought them to life in an uncanny and beautiful way. It was soul crushing to think that their one night could be dashed to pieces so trivially. The kind of soul crushing felt after Saving Private Ryan or the like. Only a few times in my life have I felt more connected to a set of characters in any medium, read or otherwise. I cannot thank you enough for allowing them to live.

However, this is not to say that the story wasn't erotic, far from it! I have experienced VERY few stories with more sexual charge and none with it's devotion. The descriptions were deep, detailed, and unafraid. You wove the story in such a way that much of the eroticism of the moments the sisters shared resulted because our ties to the sisters and not in spite of them. To quote one of your own lines, "The history, the intimacy, of that memory didn’t scare me anymore. In fact, it sweetened everything right then. Made it richer. Fuller. Deeper." It was unspeakably arousing and tender and true in the most sublime of ways.

This work was magnificent, enveloping, moving, unbelievably hot, and real.

Thank you.

Wholeheartedly, thank you.

*scratching my head bashfully* I'm giddy with your praise Anony, though I fear it's more elegant than the prose that prompted it.

Thanks,

-PF

Gawd you're a good writer. I loved the characters. No, I didn't get the photography thing at first but when you made mention of it, I got one level of it before you said it, do I get partial points? :-) I also saw the ending freeze frame coming and it damn near made me cry! I'm so happy they got their "Happily ever after"

Christi

And, yes, I give partial credit. Six points out of ten. One of these days, I'll swing back and tweak this story a little to drop a hint on the photography thing. I deleted a whole scene devoted to this but cut it out for pacing. Then I tried to wedge it into the shower scene but gave up.

Hi Paco!

I have to say this is a truly amazing work! the amount of details makes the story so rich it's a real delight to read it, the characters are very well designed, and the erotica really melts with the rest of the story, it really is a whole sexy story. I hadn't come across a story that moved me this much in a very long while! good job!

I did catch the photography thing, being a photographer myself I happen to think photographs are like stopping time… for a split second hoped it was a little more literal, like that Tabby would discover that when taking pictures she could also stop time but don't think I didn't like your way, it's just I have a little too much imagination and tend to cross over things (The camera that freezes time in DayKeepers movie) the story is perfect, wouldn't change absolutely anything

The whole story is excellent! worth sharing and if you made it through my whole comment without getting bored or upset, I'd like to ask your permission, may you be so gentle to let me transfer the story to a pdf so I can share it with a friend of mine that doesn't have access to internet, It would be completely unaltered and with your very well deserved credit at the top of each page along with the url of the story here shall she ever get the chance to vote

Please let me know

...I've got an even better idea. :)

Really good story, i loved the slow build up and the ending was a nice twist

This was one of the most...most...I cant explain it. Its magical and surprising. This, is by far, one of the best stories Ive read. I would really enjoy reading more from you. This story is just amazing! Thank you so very much! =)

I skipped over a part of the sex scene but I made it. The little kid and ball part reminds me of yu yu hakusho.

From start to finish I absolutely devoured this story. Yes it was long, but your style of writing and the plot combined into something that I would've read more than double the length and still been happy to read it.

The plot aside from the eroticism is blindingly excellent, and your writing of the desire and conflict of Molly's feelings is absolutely superb. Its been a very long time since I've enjoyed any story, including the normal books I read, as much as I have this one, and the first time I've felt compelled to leave any sort of feedback.

An excellent tale, thank you for posting it.

Mads

It was amzing....

Well i do think u could have made thoe whole thing(including the sex scenes) a little longer ;)

i really liked ur writing

keep going *thumbs up*

Your writing is amazing. You are definitely good enough to be a writer, and if I hadn't loved this story so much I would say that I'm sad your talent is being put somewhere that it won't be seen by many, and would not be respected by most. As it is, I am very, very glad that you have blessed the online community with such a great story. Please keep writing.

Wow, that was truly the best story I've read on this site, great job! :D

Definitely one of the best stories read. It truly deserves five stars. It's not just a cheap, cookie-cutter, forgettable story like most of the others, it has a well-developed story plot with a successful ending that isn't entirely about sex. Splendid story.

Hey, just wanted to remind you that this is the top story on the site with a reader voting average of 4.92! Well, how does it feel? hope good.

That was all i wanted to say and i just hope we get to see the sequel pretty soon!

P.S: actually, take your time, please don't rush it, this was an amazing story and the sequel sould be the same, if not better, actually that's asking for too much, just write the sequel however you feel like, we'll all be supporting you and will be eager to see what you come out with. peace....

Best one I've read on here and It kind of makes me sad that its over. I think it would still be great even if it didn't have the hot, sexy, steamy lesbo action. Great, GREAT job! Wish there was a sequel or something. 5/5, really, one of the best!

came three times just reading this....wooooow

This was incredible. Are you sure you're not Diane Duane in disguise?

One of the few I have read with a good plot. Didn't catch the symbolism, but I see it now.

Thank you for sharing this. This is quite possibly the best story I have read on literotica. You deserve being the highest rated story on the site.

hey all,

I only just started reading this type of "stuff" and really enjoyed this (which surprised me).

I was wondering if anyone else could recommend something similar? Since I don't seem to like some of the other stuff I've looked at here since I find it too explicit or "hardcore" whereas this I thought was "softer" and eases into the heavier parts.

Thanks and thanks to the author!

omg! i loved it!!! sequal?

amazing! i agree....sequal!

That was AMAZING and what a great story line!!!

No wonder that this story stays no. 1 in the highest rated list of all categories. Congratulations to PacoFear for this, and for numerous other stories too. Thank you!!

This touches the heart in a way you don't think it will.... Definitely needs a sequel!

Really really really enjoyed this story - not into the whole sister thing pesonally - however if i'm being honest I have to admit I was really into the sisterly bond they had going on and was kind of upset with myself for finding it romanic and hot! - Well done!

...Or more. One of the best stories I have EVER read full stop (not just erotics) and I do quite a lot of reading. I found this via the most read/voted section... and 115% deserves to be there. Absolutely gutted when it ended, defo for the sequel! I did pick up on the first point of symbolism, but not the second. I also presumed it had voyeur implications. Such a beautiful story, in soo many ways, from such a talented writer. I would suggest you turn not just to porn, but to many if not all areas of writing: I'm sure you can go far.

I am not a member of lit, although I use the site often. This is the first story I have ever felt like I needed to comment on. It is truly ***ing amazing.

There are many, many reasons why this story is so close to my heart. There are the ones mentioned above, including the sheer beauty, and these: I am a redhead Irish myself, and am deeply in love with my sister. Although brunette (not blonde), she is still a pure delicacy to look at, and is in many ways similar to the character in your story. The crunch is this... I was reading this privately upstairs when she called me down (I live with her, although, I thought, in unrequited love. Again, such connection to your story!). We share a room as we only rent a small flat, and as she came back upstairs first (we had ended up watching a movie) she bookmarked this story on her account, unbeknown to me.

The next day, she later told me, she read the whole thing through, and told me she had been feeling the same! Although both previously 'straight', we are now in the hottest relationship I have ever known, and all thanks to this sacred story (to the extent that we often spend days just making love! It's fantastic!).

Our sisterly love would not have blossomed and come to light if it were not for this story.

You, Sir, are a hero in our lives.

We thank you Greatly!

Signed

Chloe and Becky.

Seriously. I was going to comment about how quickly your writing has gotten better over time, then I read Chloe and Becky's response. Yeah. Can't top that.

Still though, I can the improvements in your storytelling over time. I probably doesn't hurt that I read new authors that I add to my list in order of their postings. I like to see the progression of their style. I look forward to finding the other Macallan story.

Your combination of heartfelt love and passionate raunchy sex is unique and I treasure it. Feeling warm and fuzzy as well as turn on to the max is very addictive and fun. Please let us know if you write anything we can buy in book form. I will be first in line.

de best of de best,,,,

tl;dr

This actually made me cry. Great story.

that was SO GOOD wow

Your story brought tears to my eyes and reminded me of two Irish sisters that I know, one of whom is corgeous and has Tabby's hair. Beautifully written!

all i can say is wow. it may be long, but it was well worth it!! no doubt about that. i nearly cried after Molly saved Tabitha from the truck. lol, i actually never did catch the hint about Tabitha being a photographer until u mention it in the end.... which makes a hell of a lot of sense. personally, i think this should be published as a book or something! can't wait to read more stories from you.

Loved the long story. Have enjoyed every last story you have wrote on here.

You have a way with it that I do so enjoy. Keep them long and make me think!

Just keep them coming!

Loved this story and would love to read about their lives together.The best story i've read on here so far!

Thank you so much for sharing it, a beautiful love story that happens to be hot, steamy "thinkin' porn" :o)

Off to bookmark your author's page!

M

I'm speechless at the greatness of this work. But I do want to add that I've read chapters of stories that actually took days to get through. Once I started this one though, I couldn't handle any interruptions. I'm thankful you didn't make this one into chapters, or I would have missed work tomorrow!

This is a story that touches you on many levels. I read it in one night, and wanted to immediately read it again. A very strong and inspiring story. It makes you want it tobe true. These two sisters and lovers need to be to be in this world to inspire, teach and give us hope in life and living. I'll say it again I WANT MORE!

Great story! Thought on the photography: So much of photography is about the location and subject of the photo but the most vital aspect of making a true masterpiece is capturing the when. Tabby had been searching for the when and focused that search in photography and the monarch. Great symbolism.

The last part made me cry. You should really consider writing a book.

Defiantly one of the best pieces I have read.

So nice to read a good erotic story, rather than so many others that are simple a description of sex.

That one had it all. A+ and hope you write many more :)

I sent you a private message mid story, due to the fact that as a viewer who doesn't usually interact with the sites he observes, you have grabbed my attention (through multiple stories). At the end of this one, when I saw that your private messages didn't work, I signed up, specifically to tell you that you are an awesome writer. I look forward to seeing more from you.

Excellent story. I'm not smart enough to figure out the symbolism but enjoyed it on several levels!

Stories that have adequate substance too them... storylines where the characters are fully established and believable... (lets face it 99% of the stories on Lit have the "Fuckee" falling over with their legs in the air and the "Fucker" already hard and pistoning in and out within the first page).... So the sex aside, ( which is satisfying mind you )... its nice when authors take their time introducing their characters and use insightful details to set the stage for their indepth story... This was accomplished quite well in this story...

Thanks for a really good read...

I loved the story, i always enjoy stories that have real writers who add depth to the writing. I think this is really a great peice of writing beyond being an erotic story. I think you are a talented writer and I salute you.

Screw this website. You're too good a writer to be handing out your hard work for free-- go get published already!

Amazing. That's how i would describe your story. Your characters were entrancing, seemingly simple on the surface, but actually chock-full of emotions and feelings that the reader will never read, but FEEL. With a satisfying build-up and things always coming full circle, you have written a story that really pulls the reader in despite being so short. The previous commenter was right, you stories don't belong here :)

Truly a great story. Tight connections between beginning and end, a mythology of its own, a loving blessing for we lucky readers.

Thanks, and I'll be reading the rest of your stories anon...

You said this was a 'try' at SF. More like a home run if you ask me...

It held together so well.

I did get a little worried at the end though.

Thanks

I scour Literotica looking for stories of quality. Stories where plots are thought out and used and where characters are realistic and developed. You sir, have met all of my criteria with this piece.

I don't care one way or the other about the sex, I'm after quality writing. The details you used with the characters brought them to life and helped me, as a reader, identify with them. Even though it seemed obvious to me her morning jog was going to be her final act, I still found myself drawn to it. I felt the stirrings of emotion as well as it unfolded, another credit to your talent.

There were some quirks a line editor would have caught, but they were few. You did indeed earn a 5 star rating with this piece from me, and I have to say I believe it may be my favorite story you've posted on the site.

simply fantastic

I musy have a continuation of this story in the form of a novel! I would read thousands of pages of this! Its so cruel how you made it so short!

First of all, thank you for submitting Macallan Promises. If this was posted in the incest/taboo section, chances are I would have overlooked it. But you have definitely rocked it in the Sci-Fi!

After locating my contact lens (yes I bugged out and the bugger got stuck in the keyboard) and taking a much needed run, I came back to finish the last two pagess. In fact this is so well written that I re-read it straight after finishing it the first time!

You've probably heard this more times than you care to know, but it doesn't hurt to feed the ego, but you are so uber talented. The emotions and desires felt so real, it almost had me questioning my heterosexuality lol.

Please extend our thanks to your friend who's in Rwanda helping you with the finer points of Gaelic.