All Comments on 'Massage Mat Ch. 07'

by KatieAnnBB

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  • 8 Comments
Rawmaster50Rawmaster50over 10 years ago
Hot and energizing

And of course Daddy will need to get in on this circus. Someone is going to need a big house to hold all these lovers. Yeah I request more, lots more.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
*****

Nice job. Hot. You write well. Lots of possibilities for interesting combinations. You got all these complicated relationships disclosed quite skillfully. Now everyone knows, except the father about his wife doing the son, and the son doesn't know about his gf and his mom, but it sounds like they all will be ok with it.

imharmless69imharmless69over 10 years ago
Fantastic!

God, I love Leah!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Wonderful story so far. I hope we're only near the half-way point.

Sometimes a series on Literotica can boil down to (or degenerate to) introducing characters and then just seeing how many different mathematical combinations a writer can sexually match them up in. I hope that's not where this series is headed. This series has a pat mathematical ending waiting for us. Beth marries Mark. Leah marries Jason. They all do the horizontal bop in a big house near the college and it's Happily Ever After. I hope you don't go for the easy ending. That's partly because I don't like Mark as much as Beth, Leah or Jason. He's been too needy and clinging, and he was really stupid to bring Beth into the Master Suite of the House. Maybe he subconsciously wanted Beth to find out, somehow had fantasies of including Beth in his play with his daughter. I guess we'll see how Mark reacts to Leah sleeping with Beth first. But good sex isn't the key to a good story, it's believable conflict.

I thought the coupling of Leah and Beth was rushed, especially since Leah and Jason haven't gotten together. But it was still hot and well played. The scenario and dialog between Beth and Leah ended up feeling very real, and very sexy. And it could lead to believable tension and conflict with Mark and Jason. Beth used her sexual super power of transporting her lovers through her eyes. And Leah got to use her sexual super power of being able to urge her partner onto orgasm with just a few rhythmically timed, perfectly phrased words. In the case of Beth, it wasn't dirty sex talk, but talk about how special, romantic, wanted and loved Beth is to Leah. And the promise of grandchildren. I hope to read more of that. Leah might be loudmouthed, but in the bedroom, she knows exactly the right words that her partner wants to hear. That's magic. And you make me believe that magic. Well done!

Have Leah and Jason even kissed yet? It's strange for her to be promising grandchildren, when they haven't even kissed. Did Leah ever make good on her 5 minute kiss with her friend? There might be a story there. The friend might notice Leah's change in attitude toward lesbian sex. That might actually make the friend less interested, because part of the appeal for her might have been wanting to be the "first" woman with Leah, her first lesbian experience.

We need a scene with Jason and Leah, obviously. I hope their first coupling could be away from their parents prying eyes and hands. I want to firmly establish the love and romance between them, before you start complicating the sex lives even more.

You have a great way of mixing casual humor, love and romance in with the nasty sex. It makes the sex even hotter.

I would like to see Mark try to make a pass at Jason, either one on one or in an upcoming group sex scene. How Jason reacts to that pass could be both funny, hot, and tender. I don't know if Jason or Mark would actually be interested in gay-male sexual contact, even in the context of a threesome or moresome. But I could see Mark making an awkward pass at Jason, thinking that was somehow expected of him, since Beth and Leah got together. Mark would be trying to find some balance, and a way to deal with his jealousy, figuring out how he fits within the "new family's" sexual dynamic. How Jason could lovingly, humorously accept or reject those advances might be a scene of genuine sexual tension, character insight and maybe even hot sex.

I know that you are very interested in pleasing your growing fan base. I understand that gay-male sex is a turnoff for some (a third-rail of sexual fantasy). I just think you have the skill to pull it off well. Whether Jason and Mark decide they would rather end up just being "fishing buddies", rather than "fuck buddies" all depends on how the characters speak to you, and you speak to us.

As far as making the story better, I like how the chapter lengths have naturally grown. Your writing can sustain even longer chapters. You started out slow, with only page long entries. Now we are up to four pages. Your writing can sustain even longer sections, if that's where the story takes you. Detail is hot. Your dialog is hot. The detail and dialog about Leah's grey/green witch eyes was perfect.

I'm enjoying the humor of Beth sort of realizing that she's in an erotic fantasy. She is the most literary of the characters, actually being transported during sex into a poetic allegory with tilled earth and planting machines. You've taken a strange and what I thought was awkward first story, and turned it into a recurring theme. It's made me appreciate that first installment and your development of the story even more.

I can see you rushing to a full conclusion in your next chapter. I hope you don't, or if you do, you find ways to spin-off some of these characters into their own mini-series. You were able to dovetail Leah and Mark's story nearly seamlessly in with this one. I think it would be interesting to include characters from your other stories (have them make cameo appearances) even without there being any sex involved.

Anyway, you have rapidly become one of my favorite writers on Literotica. The growth in confidence and style, even throughout this series, has been exponential. The dialog is excellent. The sex is consistently hot. You've made an impression on me. Thank you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Awesome

Easily the best installment of the series. Leah and Beth......the emotion was incredible. The sex....no love making pulled you into the story. These two women have a bond that cannot be broken

Bebop3Bebop3over 6 years ago
Wonderful, more betrayal

So, he's never been in any other sexual relationship and he's completely fine with her being with two women (one on multiple occasions) and one guy. He's also cool with her not discussing it with him first.

Add into the mix that their relationship is one that is, by need, something that needs to be guarded, protected and kept between the two of them. She's now told her friend, her friend's husband knows, the father of his girlfriend and the girlfriend all without consulting him.

He absolutely, completely needs to get away from her. This story is going downhill at lightning speed and she's becoming loathsome.

Foxterot7aFoxterot7aover 2 years ago

Outstanding story. Both couples are lucky to find each other. Daughter's concerns were well founded. Father was somewhat careless. Mother and son have talked about having children; have discussed dating/loving other people; and the fact that son needs to live a normal life. Preceding being said, mother can be more open about their relationship; however, he does need to be informed about who she has told of their relationship. Wil some effort on the part of the author, I can see a novel coming from this series.

josenussbaumjosenussbaumover 1 year ago

As predicted in some of the comments on previous chapters Beth is becoming a real slut.

1. fucking Jason. Normal, that's what this story is about.

2. sex with Amy. Still understandable as a massage with happy ending.

3. sex with Lori. Hormones?

4. sex with John! Hmm, didn't Beth say Dan and Jason were her only men ever?

5. sex with Leah! Even before John has sex with Leah. Disgusting. But it's OK because they won't tell anyone.

I'm sure Mark will be the next one.

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userKatieAnnBB@KatieAnnBB
I'd like to sincerely thank everyone for reading and for your encouragement. Massage Mat was my first attempt at writing a story of any kind, and things have gone from there. Thank you again for reading...I had no idea that writing could be so fulfilling. PS The avatar is ...

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