All Comments on 'My Cousin Jo and I Pt. 02'

Great story so far hope you continue can't wait for the next chapter

Getting better, at least story wise, the grammatical and structural problems still persist!

Better than chapter one. The story is progressing nicely, and the grammer errors were fewer, but still there.

How old are the twins again?

Very HOT !! Please write the next chapter soon so we can finally see Jo give it to her cousin.......... great story line. Thank you !!

Ok, I've really been enjoying the stories, but some things bother me. First, was is up with this family that thinks 18+ years old can be ordered around like little children? Second, what an 18 year old doing ordering 19 year olds around and making comments about their sex experience?

...as the run-on sentences really distracted me on this installment.

That said, I do love how she teases him, although the twins grabbing him seems really out of place. Him putting suntan lotion on her is sensual, but he shouldn't cum just from her touching him once. Those two things seem really awkward.

Love how she's "leading him on" and it's convincing. Given the above distractions though, this is a 4.

"Saying mom and dad said they could go swimming"

" your way to young to be fooling around some guys dick"

Wait, weren't they supposed to be older than him? In this chapter it feels like they are significantly younger. My first thought is that they are around 13 years old at most.

Because if they were older, why didn't Jo mention anything about them being molested also? (or for that matter if the oldest sister ever were)

Not to mention they were wearing one-pieces, and Richard didn't spend even a second noticing their bodies, so they mustn't really have matured yet.

It's just one of many examples of poor editing and clumsy writing.

btw. correction of the second sentence, showing a few of the typical errors, here there are three of them in a single sentence:

your - you're (contraction, not possessive)

guys - guy's (possessive, not plural)

to young - too young

The twins are a year older than the protagonist, but are not allowed to go to the pool without someone younger than them? And they are told to do what they are told?

You need a more logical reason for them all to go to the pool.