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All Comments on 'Naughty Dinner Date'

by Peglegparrot

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  • 8 Comments
LindaAnnKLindaAnnKabout 9 years ago
Hot!

Oh please do continue!

KristieBechirKristieBechirabout 9 years ago
It's 'you're', not 'your'

Two times in the first couple of sentences.

And stories in the second person never work.

LarryInSeattleLarryInSeattleabout 9 years ago
There were more...

...mistakes than that - spelling, punctuation, word choice, tense. Man, you hit them all.

Monagamous_NowMonagamous_Nowabout 9 years ago
Continued?

I hope so.... that was hot!

impo_60impo_60about 9 years ago
Continue? I realy hope not!!!

Why was he telling what happened to her if she was there with him and lived all that? So 1*

lgcelsielgcelsieabout 9 years ago

I hope chapter 2 -- and 3 -- are not far behind. What about the barmaid?

wifelvrmanwifelvrmanabout 9 years ago
Hottest story ever!!! Please

Hottest story ever!!!! Please write some more!!!

RedDevil5875RedDevil5875almost 7 years ago
Love the story.

Hate the grammar. This could have been a 5 if j267 had written it. As it is; barely a 1.

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