Nephrite (The One Week Chronicles)

I decided to forge my own path and vowed to earn my own money no matter the cost. I rummaged in my cupboard and dug out some skin tight denim cut offs and revealing top, matching it with a pair of PVC thigh high boots. Sitting in front of the mirror, I applied some make-up, keeping it red and slutty. I was dressing to entice someone to pay for sex with me and I desperately fought to keep that thought from myself.

As I finished my make-up, I suddenly paused, hands shaking and body trembling with what I was about to do. For the first time since the funerals, I burst into tears, great sobbing cries of grief. I missed Lucy and Tash more than I could bear. Losing my job, pride and dignity made their loss even harder to take. Still trembling, I reached for my phone. It was about to be cut off, but I had time enough for one more phone call. I found the number and pressed dial. It was answered on the second ring.

"Hi," I said, a little weakly. I didn't want make this call. I wanted to make my own path, forge my own destiny and was ashamed.

"Hi hun," said the voice. I could tell that she was pleased to hear from me. "You ok?"

"I'm in a bit of a pickle," I said and the voice became instantly concerned.

"You on a bridge?" she asked. I shook my head. That was a long time ago and I was much changed.

"No bridge," I said. "Nor will there ever be."

"I'll have a car pick you up."

We chatted for a while and then I hung up and looked around the bedsit. I'd sold my TV and Blu ray player, hoping to get enough cash to last until I could find work, however menial, but even the smallest jobs were blocked from me. With a heavy sigh, I grabbed a bag and packed away my clothes and make-up.

I filled a few more bags, changed into something more appropriate and was just finishing as a taxi pulled up outside and honked its horn. I struggled with my bags and the cabbie helped me get them into the boot. He knew where I was going and so held open the door and screeched off once he was settled.

It had been many years since I'd left and it felt strange to be coming back. I was coming home and felt like I'd failed. I'd been careless and thought that I could say and act as I wanted with impunity. There were too many prejudices and too much spite in this world for me to do that.

As the cabbie pulled into the driveway, the tyres crunching on gravel, the door to the large house opened and the woman who had saved me from that bridge all those years ago opened the door and greeted me with a big hug and a warm smile.

She led me in and I followed her into the hall, feeling dejected and miserable. I still mourned Lucy and Tash, the grief cutting deep. As we entered the kitchen, I pulled up a stool and gratefully accepted a large goblet of wine. I'd not been able to afford any alcohol and it tasted good. As I drank, Jackie nattered away.

"You'll stay here until you're back on your feet," she said and I thanked her. "Don't thank me," she replied with a grin. "I've got you a position at my firm. It's temping work, but keep your nose clean and you can work your way up. May as well start using that law degree eh?" I burst into tears and she reached out for me, taking me into her warmth. We chatted at least once a week, but it was good to see her again.

"You haven't failed," she said after a while. She handed me a tissue to wipe the tears from my face and I smiled sadly.

"Feels like it," I said. Jackie lifted my chin.

"You're a beautiful woman," she replied softly. "You've grown from a boy child into a woman. We all have bumps along the way. It's how we face those challenges and overcome them that defines us. You've overcome so much on your own, so let me help you over this one. It's not a failure to seek help."

I hugged her again and she smiled.

"Your room is the usual; second one on the right as you go upstairs."

"Thank you," I said and slid from the stool to grab my bags. As I did so, Jackie called out.

"Oh, Jessie?" I turned to her and she smiled at me. "I had to change your name. Apparently Jessie has angry flags next to it from some spoilt rich family."

"Oh," I replied, a little disappointed. I loved my name. The first time I said it, it just felt right. I was the only Jessie I knew as well. "What have you called me?" I asked. Jackie smiled.

"A fitting name with eyes like yours," she said. "I felt it suited you really rather well."

"What?" I asked, hating the way she teased me.

"Jade," she said. "Your new name is Jade."

Jade, I thought, mulling it over in my mind and saying the word. I liked it. Even more than Jessie. New start, new name.

Jade.