Odd Socks and a Crack Pipe

She stood up and shook her head. Her breasts jiggled as shavings and dirt spilled from her hair and dust hung in the air, I brushed her down. There was a large splinter of wood in her bum, she hadn't noticed. "Katie, I think you're injured, you have a decent bit of wood wedged in your bum." I picked other bits of wood and shavings from her back and her bum and her legs, she tried to shake the rest of the mess from her hair.

"Katie, we'll need tweezers to get that out, let's get ourselves cleaned up." I looked at the mess on the table, there were a few spots of blood and a large wet patch - at least it was sturdy.

All shiny clean and smelling fresh, Katie wanted to plan her next move. We sat by the pool drinking one of Terence's better bottles of wine. Katie smoked a lot, I had one or two, I was careful not to smoke too many. We discussed her options, she was adamant that they would divorce. She was certain Terence wouldn't contest the divorce, but she thought he may dispute the terms of the settlement. I told her not to worry about all that at this stage, she should focus on the kids. By the time the ashtray was full, we'd decided that the next day we would collect the children from the beach house and I'd move in to the spare room. I was happy with that decision, I didn't want to leave her alone.

000

I'd never seen their beach house before, it was impressive. 'Architectural rustic,' nestled amongst gum trees with magnificent views of the ocean. Katie took the three kids for a walk along the beach, I pottered about the house. The kitchen and dining area opened onto a massive deck, the dining table was crap. It looked like something from Ikea. I knew of a table that would be so much better, once the blood and the stains were sanded out. As per Katie's instructions, I collected up Terence's clothes and his junk. I filled a couple of large garbage bags - move over Terry, your time is up.

Katie told the kids that she and Terence were having marital problems, she didn't mention anything about drugs. She told them I'd be moving in as their 'live-in' nanny and housekeeper. The kids seemed ok with this arrangement.

Over time we settled into a routine. Katie would head off to the office, she was back working crazy hours, flying all over the place, attending corporate functions. She loved being the captain of industry, dominating in a "man's world." She had it all, the career and the family. Jodie and Rebecca went to school and Jonathon to University. I continued to cook, clean and look after the household. Dinners improved considerably, I cooked every day, and I even started to make bread.

Katie made one concession in her corporate schedule, every Thursday morning she made time for me. Katie would don some really fancy and sexy gear and we'd go at it. I really enjoyed Thursdays, it wasn't swinging from the chandeliers sex, but I was satisfied.

I wasn't a surrogate dad for the kids, but I did a lot of the standard parent stuff. Picking them up after training, sleepovers with their friends or band practise. I did help with the homework and organising their schedules. Katie seemed happy for me to take over part management of the kids as well as full management of the house.

In hindsight, she had a good thing going. She had the career and the lifestyle she wanted. She had the kids she wanted and someone else to look after all the mundane stuff. I had it pretty good too, living in a fantastic house, great kids, regular sex and not a worry in the world. Then it all came crashing down again, Terence had a proposition for me.

Terence had moved interstate. We'd remained in contact, I was his link to Jonathon, Rebecca and Jodie. He'd ring and we would chat about the kids, he still maintained that Katie was playing me for a sucker, he still jokingly called me the houseboy. We'd long got over the threats and nasty name calling, actually we did become mates again. Terence had opened another gallery in Sydney, the gay capital of the Southern Hemisphere. He'd created a niche in the art world with contemporary aboriginal artwork.

During one of our regular chats, Terence asked for a favour. He wanted a large window display table suitable for sculptures and modern aboriginal artefacts - whatever they were. He didn't want to buy the table, he wanted it on consignment. If it sold he'd take 25% and I'd keep the rest. I discussed the project with Katie, to ask if she was ok with me working with her 'ex'. Katie thought it wasn't a bad idea, she couldn't care less what that 'faggot' ex-husband got up to. Yep, it turns out Terence was gay, if only I had known that!

So I built a cute table for Terence's gallery. It was a pretty good table, not a bad effort for the short time frame I had to work with. I wanted to give this table a bit of pizazz, so I painted small ivory bands on the bottom of each leg, they looked like socks. I drove the 10 hours up to Sydney and set up the table in his fancy Elizabeth Bay Gallery. It was actually quite good fun catching up with Terence, he still called me the houseboy. Terence asked me to stay and have dinner with him and his new partner. We had far too many drinks, so I crashed on his couch for the night.

About 4 days later, Terence calls again, he'd sold the table and the money was coming my way. I was stoked, $7,500 minus materials for less than a week's work! I asked him if he wanted to do it again. He said yes and more. He wanted another series of tables for his gallery, all with the little white socks on the legs. Also, he had some interior designer called Caroline, asking questions about my work, apparently she wants a large table for a board room. I asked Terence to send through whatever details he had. A rough sketch came through, it was impressive and big. This boardroom table was big, too big for my set up in Katie's garage. I discussed this possible commission with Katie, she was excited for me. I told her the Camberwell garage was too small for this kind of work. We'd both need to think of a solution.

I approached Katie with a proposition. Fortunately, Katie said yes, actually she jumped at the opportunity. My idea was to take a short term lease on some showroom space; big enough to handle the large commission, small enough to be cheap. However, with the benefit of Katie's money, the idea developed into something much enthusiastic. We bought an empty inner city warehouse and set up a retail showroom with a workshop at the rear. We didn't rent the place, we created a joint partnership and her seed money purchased the building. Everything was in Katie's name, she was paying the bills. I merchandised the front showroom with some fairly simple pieces and we hung up our shingle, S & K Interiors. I would design, construct and sell; she would cover the expenses.

I worked fairly hard, selling and building during the day as well as looking after the Oakshotts. It went quite well, S & K Interiors was ticking along at a healthy pace, Katie was so happy for me. Eventually I got around to the large board room table for Caroline, Terence's client. I emailed up my initial drawings, an email came back..."Darling, it's just too gorgeous." So, it looks like, Caroline the Client, liked my ideas. I quoted an outrageous price, with Terence and Caroline involved, there were a lot of middlemen in this deal. Less than 48 hours later I had the green light for my first big commission. Caroline said her client didn't need the table until Christmas, so I had a bit of time.

In the meantime, the retail component of S & K interiors was ticking along nicely, sales were good and I was getting better at working out what the market wanted. Then, the Television gods smiled on me.

My simple range of dining tables and chairs with their ivory socks ended up on a home renovating show. The show's judges went nuts about my stuff, "cutting edge design," "on trend..." I couldn't believe the way the judges carried on. My tables were good, but at the end of the day, they were just a standard table with painted feet. The particular table that was featured on the TV show, had all four legs painted in slightly different tones of the same colour. A bit odd, but boy did they sell. The television producers created a follow up story on me - from insurance salesman to celebrity artisan. Suddenly S & K Interiors was a hot brand and sales were blossoming.

So now I had exposure, clients, commissions, and money flowing in. S & K Interiors was kicking goals. I had a career again as well as minor celebrity status. Katie was so pleased, the "houseboy" had made good. For me, life was fairly brilliant too. Money, sex, a great house, a fantastic family, a place at the beach, but best of all I was busy. No idle hands for the devil to play with. Then, Caroline the Client called, she babbled on about my success and more ideas she had. How together we could become the hottest Interior Design firm in the world, bigger than Conran, or Ralph Lauren. "Darling, you must come up to see me in Sydney, we need to plan. Also, Sebastian, I want you to make a presentation to our corporate client, keep them enthused."

No big deal, I'd done enough corporate presentations in my previous life to not be too fazed. My elevated fame from the Television show helped a lot, now I wasn't just some hick woodworker. I flew to Sydney, and finally met "Caroline the Client." She was your typical cashed up Sydney socialite, great clothes, heaps of gold jewellery, skin like a lizard and a body created in the gym and the surgery. I guessed right about Caroline, if you could help her climb the social ladder, she was your best friend, if not, you were a cockroach. Fortunately for me, I could help her climb.

So we met the board of directors at their offices in Market Place. Lots of business types in suits and stunning harbour views. Caroline was in her element, this was her playground. She was "dressed to the nines" a generous cleavage, overly tanned skin and super high heels. I did my spiel for the Directors, how the design reflected the core elements of their business; trust, stability, experience and so on. They lapped up this shit, my new found celebrity as an "on trend" designer helped. As soon as the presentation was done and we were descending 20 something floors in a glass lift, Caroline plants this kiss on me, not a peck, but a serious tongue mashing kiss. All she says is, "Sebastian, I could make you a rock star in the design world." I guess she thought the presentation went well.

We jump in her car and she takes me for a 'bite to eat', looks like work is done for the day! Sitting there in a pretentious waterfront bistro, Caroline's phone rings. It turns out, the captains of industry loved my presentation and they want to commission a heap more stuff. Caroline rants on about how Sebastian is not a machine, he's an artist. He can't possibly produce that much "art" with such a small time window. Promises were made, fees negotiated and I was now seriously back in the corporate world.

"Sebastian, we need champagne, you have just agreed to build and design all the furniture for three floors of merchant banking heaven." Also, they want to know when you can start on their new Shanghai office."

I'm gobsmacked. I'm speechless. Caroline is beaming.

After the first bottle, I decide to text Katie, "Presentation went well, we are going to need a bigger factory." After the second bottle, I send her another text, "Staying in Sydney tonight, you'll have to make the school lunches."

Then it all got a bit hazy for me. I remember heading back to Caroline's Pott's Point apartment. I remember sitting on the edge of her spa, receiving a sensational blow job. Then nothing. Next thing I recall, I'm naked in this massive white bedroom and Caroline is doing a generous line of coke off my chest. I look around the room, our clothes are strewn all over the place. She sprinkles the white powder on my nipples and then licks it up, she inhales a fair bit from the end of my dick. Fuck, please no, not coke, anything but coke.

She straddles my face, cowboy style, her hand is buried inside a manicured pussy, hovering above my mouth. She shouts at me, "Sebastian, eat me." Her pussy drops and I start to lick and suck aggressively, I can feel coke fuelled adrenalin pump through my entire body. I'm pissed, I'm high and I'm tongue fucking this socialite. Caroline is licking and slobbering all over my dick. She slaps it against her face and grinds her pelvis into my nose. My nose starts to run, I start to sniff uncontrollably. I can feel the familiar rush of coke through my body. I loved coke. She squeezes a couple of fingers into my arse, I feel 10 feet tall and 10 inches long, I can last forever.

Do you know how hard it is to get off coke? It took me 5 years to get my habit into a manageable state. Coke needs serious management. Coke and me are old friends. We saw a lot of each other at one stage. Coke cost me my insurance business. To be coke's boyfriend, you need a lot of money. To marry coke, you need piles of dough and enough to make it last. We'd been married and then divorced, the divorce was messy. I couldn't afford the relationship and eventually it cost me everything.

Caroline and I are still fucking and frolicking all over her apartment. We are doing it in every way possible, in her pussy, in her mouth, in her arse, in my arse, in the bathroom on the kitchen floor. Her apartment is decorated with our antics. Champagne, vibrators, sperm, KY Jelly, the detritus of our passion is everywhere. I couldn't give a shit, I'm too busy hoovering more coke up my nose. I'm fucking loving it.

Eventually, I've exhausted Caroline's supply and I'm demanding more, I've threatened her. If she doesn't get more, I'll destroy her face. Caroline heads off to the bathroom to make a few calls. She tells me it will be all good, very soon. She tells me to calm down, she has fixed everything. I'm on edge, I'm buzzing, sex, coke, champagne...my old life back.

It could have been a week, a day, an hour, I have no idea when. I'm just awake and in a hospital bed, Katie is there. Some doctor is explaining to Katie that I'm a serious binge addict, and that she may want to carefully consider her next move. He says I'm going to be trouble and that the only way forward is if I want to do something about my addiction. He tells Katie she can help and support me, but at the end of the day, I need to make a decision myself, I have to want to give it up. I've heard all this before, so I feign sleep, hoping these fuckers would go away and leave me alone. I get a glimpse of Katie, she looks like shit. She looks as though the police have told her a loved one has been murdered. Her eyes are red with dark puffy rings, she's shed a lot of tears over me. I can't believe I've fucked up again, and this was a truly sweet deal.

Time heals all wounds, Love conquers all. I'll ad my own cliché here. "Coke is a Bitch!" So now I'm back in Melbourne. Katie is looking after me, I can't believe she wanted to take me on, she does have a heart of Gold! I'm not completely out of the woods, but I'm getting better. I have given up coffee, alcohol, cigarettes, red meat and hopefully coke. Katie says we are going to live a long, happy and boring life together. She kept S & K Interiors going in my absence, she informs me that she has installed herself as the business manager. She's given up corporate life for me and her family, she's building our business, something the kids can inherit. Katie now says family and health are more important than success and corporate life. Boy, has she changed.

I'm really fit and most of the time, happy. With S & K interiors I look after design and production. Being creative and busy keeps my mind off the bad stuff - Idle hands are the devil's plaything. Katie's a natural with sales, she decided to keep me away from the customers. I receive a small wage and not much more. This was my idea, I don't want money. Money makes me do dumb things, like coke. Coke makes me do even dumber things, like try to scam my way into a rich family, break up a marriage and plot all kinds of devious shit.

Katie won't let me marry her until Jodie finishes school. That will be in three months, so I'm planning the wedding. Katie says she is too busy running a house, a family, a boyfriend, a gay ex-husband as well as S & K Interiors to waste time organising a wedding.

So love and a family are now my drug of choice. Money and coke are my "ex's." I hope I am done with both of them.