All Comments on 'Power of the Mind Ch. 02'

Just dont stop now you are on track to a wonderful story

Cant wait to see where Alex goes from here and with his Power he should be able to get Money to have a place for his Harem.

This story reads like every thirteen year-old's first fantasy. Sorry, but I could not suspend my disbelief enough to enjoy the rest. A more mature approach would be better for both the story and the telling.

Your idea might be good but it lacks of eroticism. The sex scene is not very well described. They fucked and that's it. If you continue the story it would be best to get inside the characters because here you just have a guy who fucks his neighbor. You don't know him or her. A story is better when you relate to the characters.

I agree with previous comment you could embellish the sex scene with more details about sensation of sight and smells etc.

Please continue and I believe you have already alluded using the Power on Angela's mother but also consider your twin being mind modified to engage in some lesbian oral sex and maybe incest + lesbian 3 way romp too.

Good job overall and I'm anxious to read more from these humble beginning chapters.

Next three chapters have just been uploaded. I have tried to improve the quality of my writing in accordance to the suggestions I have received.

As for the ideas you have said, well you'll just have to wait and find out.

Once again, thanks for the feedback