Prom Ch. 15: Catharsis

She slowly bobbed her face over him for another minute or two for reasons she didn't quite understand. She gently worked her tongue around his shaft and let him slide gracefully in and out of her mouth. It was like she was kissing him tenderly. She kept at it, sucking his dick almost back to hardness, for a little while before finally raising up and letting him fall from her lips. She sat up slowly as the blood began to rush from her head. She'd been down there a while. She finally looked over at him and took in his expression, with no emotion of her own.

Jeff was looking at her with wide eyes. All in all, it had been a spectacular blowjob and he had gotten off intensely. But her last few minutes of gently blowing him after he'd finished had felt wildly pleasurable. Almost too good. As he stared over at her pink cheeks and reddened lips, he knew at that moment that he'd have to try to get with her again. There was just no way he couldn't get more. He exhaled deeply and shot her a satisfied grin.

"Shit, you're the best. Simply the best." He brought his hands to his head and rubbed his hair back. "Wow."

Rachel would normally have giggled or grinned or felt herself swell with satisfaction and pride at his compliments. But she didn't feel any of that. She felt just emptiness. She was glad he had enjoyed it, she guessed. But mainly, she was just glad it was over.

She rubbed some moisture from the corners of her mouth and shot herself a look in the visor mirror. Her lips were a little plump but she looked normal. She felt a slight pang of shame as she thought about her impending meeting with Kevin. The whole point of seeing him was supposed to be so she could tell him everything and lay it out and let him know why things had been so bad lately. But now would she tell him about this? "Oh, hey Kev! Got lots to tell you. But first, just finished sucking Jeff's dick again. LOL. Crazy right?"

Rachel's scoffed at the thoughts and shook her head. Her shame continued to grow but it didn't truly bother her. It was just another bad thing she'd done. Throw it up on the pile, she thought dryly. She'd surely be adding to it again before she knew it. She was done with trying to explain things away.

She gave Jeff a blank look and raised an eyebrow. "So are we gonna go back or what? Got plans, remember?"

Jeff swallowed at her cool and mechanical demeanor. She had shown almost no emotion the entire time she'd been in his car. He had known her for a few years and Rachel was a lot of things, but emotionless was not one of them. He suddenly felt awkward and small.

With a quick nod, he moved to clumsily pull his pants back up. He cleared his throat and gave her another nervous glance but she was already looking out her window. He shook his head and pulled out of the parking lot and headed back towards Baja Fiesta.

They pair arrived back at Rachel's car a few minutes later and Jeff threw it in park. He felt like he should say something. But he didn't know what.

"So, Rach, um-."

She looked back at him with a thousand-yard stare.

"What?"

Jeff shifted uncomfortably. Usually he had something slick or smart to say but her cold, vacant aura was throwing him off. He fumbled awkwardly with his words.

"Well, I mean, um, thanks for, uh, that. And hey, remember I'm gonna delete those pictures! I'm sorry again for all of tha-." He trailed off.

Rachel waited until he fell silent and blinked her eyes.

"Um, okay. Well...bye."

And with that, she turned and stepped out of the car. Closing the door softly, she made it back over to where she had parked and slumped into the driver's seat with a sigh. She didn't even look over to watch as Jeff backed his car out of the adjacent spot and disappeared from the lot. She reapplied some chap stick to her slightly swollen lips and checked the time on her cell. She still had a little while before she had to go meet Kevin.

Her eyes still on her phone, Rachel again noticed the voicemail icon from Matt. She sighed and clicked the button to play his message. Her expression stayed dull and stoic as she listened to his slick, casual voice play over the speaker.

He had called sometime during the latter portion of the prom to see if she wanted to skip any afterparty and roll by his house. And if not, to tell her that she should come "hang out" sometime today. He'd actually expected that she would consider ditching her date and whatever situation that entailed and come by (probably around midnight) just to suck his dick. And if that didn't work, she'd surely be down to take care of it today. And why not? What else was more important?

Rachel scoffed at what an asshole request it was before vacantly resigning herself to fact that she was still going to do it anyway. She was nearing rock-bottom after the day she'd had (capped off by what she had just done) and these were the exact moments when she'd give in to just about anything. She was tired and drained and Matt would make the fourth guy she'd been with since the morning (fifth if she counted Kevin) but she didn't really care at this point. She could picture the ridiculous scene as it played out in her head:

Likely right after her talk with Kevin, which she was now beginning to realize would probably do nothing to make her feel better, she'd drive over to Matt's house and just let herself in. She'd walk down his familiar basement steps and find him on the couch, probably watching TV or playing PlayStation. She'd quietly sit next to him and either watch him for a minute or perhaps engage in some meaningless small talk. Then either he'd give her a look or she'd take the initiative.

She'd take off most of her clothes (all of them if he asked) and politely slide off her seat on the couch and kneel down between his legs. He'd be wearing just gym shorts or sweats, probably not even underwear knowing she was coming. She'd pull her hair back and simply go to work.

She didn't have the energy to fuck him so he'd just have to settle for getting his dick sucked while he relaxed on the couch. Some of the last few times she'd done it, he had actually even kept playing his video game. He'd gotten so used to her work that it was a lot more casual now. It was still always an incredible experience and he'd cum hard every time, but he no longer needed to lie back and focus.

After Rachel had been dutifully bobbing her face into his lap for a while, Matt would eventually get close and have to pause the game so that he could cum in her mouth or onto her body. Soon after he finished, Rachel would clean herself up and quietly put her clothes back on. Sometimes she'd hang for a bit. She might play his game or maybe they'd smoke a bowl. But other times she'd simply make a little small talk and casually excuse herself to leave.

Matt never really seemed to care one way or the other. He'd gotten what he wanted and she'd done what she'd come to do. Neither person really had any actual feelings towards the other, so once their business was complete, there was no real reason to hang out. Rachel would walk back up through his empty house and get back in her car and go home. She'd tell herself that it was the last time that she'd be pulling out of his driveway. But so far, there had always been a next time.

Rachel sighed and she sent him a text saying she'd be over sometime later in the evening. Maybe this would be the last time. She rolled her eyes and smirked at herself. She'd thought she'd really meant it when she'd left his house earlier that week. It had been a bad experience and she'd sworn that it was the end. The fact that he'd actually talked her into-. She swallowed and pushed away the image. She didn't want to think about it.

She put her phone down just as she felt her stomach let out a grumpy growl. She hadn't really eaten all day so she decided she'd grab a table a little early maybe get an appetizer while she waited for Kevin to arrive. With a final glance in the mirror, she hopped out of her car and turned towards the restaurant.

As she stepped toward the curb, she paused and almost laughed out loud as she realized that she had never bothered to button her shirt back up from her little ride with Jeff. Her head truly was in a different place. She stopped and looked down at her chest and started fixing the buttons when the restaurant door swung open and she heard a familiar laugh. Her fingers fell from the buttons and needles shot through her skin. She brought her face up slowly to follow the sound as her stomach began to fill up with tiny, stabbing pains. The blank expression that had covered her face like a mask for the past several hours finally broke into a look of painful shock.

Rebecca.

Rebecca stepped out onto the curb with two girls Rachel knew from the field hockey team. She was laughing at something and it had been her recognizable cackle that had caught Rachel's ear. Their eyes met and the air suddenly felt thin. Rebecca stopped cold in her tracks and her laughter ceased like a needle being pulled off a record.

Rachel stood frozen, her loose shirt still hanging open from the button she had been unable to redo. She bit down on her lip hard (to the point of pain) as she felt a tidal wave of emotion about to crash over her. She had been so drained and she'd pushed everything away for the past couple of hours. But seeing her old friend, face to face, especially after she had spent the better part of the day going over all the good and awful times they'd had together, had finally broken the dam.

She was going to fall apart within seconds and she couldn't let Rebecca see that. Her stomach twisted as she realized how she looked with her shirt halfway unbuttoned. Had Rebecca seen her get out of Jeff's car? Did it matter? She desperately needed to turn away before it was too late but she couldn't move a muscle. Her eyes were wide and frightened as she pleaded silently with her friend for a sign. Any sign at all.

Rebecca swallowed hard as she stared coolly back at the girl in front of her. Her other friends noticed the sudden silence and fell quiet as well as they recognized what was happening. Most of the field hockey team was still friendly with Rachel but they had been Rebecca's friends first. With the exception of a few, they hadn't shunned her or openly trashed her, but they had also made it clear whose side they were on.

Rachel's eyes flicked to Jenn and she remembered the night she and Jim had dropped her off at her house when she'd been so drunk. That had been a crazy night. Jenn had gotten in trouble when she had loudly crashed through her house and she hadn't been at any parties for a few weeks after. But Rachel thought of what Jim might've talked her friend into if she had allowed herself to be dropped off first. She missed Jenn a lot. She missed them all. But she missed Rebecca the most.

Rebecca didn't move a muscle, and for the briefest of seconds, a look of genuine sadness flashed through her green eyes. Rachel saw it, and in that one moment, she felt her spirits lift. But they crashed again immediately as she watched Rebecca's gaze move down from her face. She saw her stare at her unbuttoned shirt and curl her lips into a disdainful, knowing smirk.

The sadness was gone from Rebecca's eyes, replaced only with a smug, penetrating glare. She cocked her head to the side, and then with an audible scoff, she shook her head and stepped off the curb, turning towards where she had parked her car. The other girls nervously stayed put for a second before shooting Rachel a regretful look and following their friend.

Rachel felt her body lurch and the breath rush painfully from her lungs. She did everything in her power to stifle a violent sob as she spun quickly back towards her car. She sobbed again, this time more loudly, and the other girls stopped to turn their heads in her direction. Rebecca watched as Rachel clumsily moved to unlock her car door and throw herself inside while a hand covered her mouth. She flinched as the door slammed shut and she saw her old friend lose all control inside the car.

Rachel brought both hands to her face and let it out. She cried loudly, no longer caring if the girls outside could hear her. She couldn't stop it now. She had bottled it all up and she would've been fine to keep it there as she dealt with Kevin and Matt and the rest of her day. But seeing Rebecca had shattered her wall. It was too much to fight back and she sobbed violently as she slumped her shoulders over in her seat.

Rebecca swallowed hard as she watched the ugly scene unfold. Her breath began to quicken but she steadied herself and shook her head dismissively. Probably some standard Rachel bullshit, she thought dryly. Probably blew some guy at that prom she went to and now she feels bad about it. Same old boring story. She turned her back and reached out for her own door handle.

But as she grasped it firmly and began to pull, she involuntarily stopped. She let it go and stared up at the sky as she exhaled deeply and closed her eyes with a dry smile. She thought of the time Rachel had pretended to have a panic attack during one their classes to save her from having to give a presentation that she hadn't prepared for. And there was that crazy time at the beach that Rachel had been 'forced' to hook up with both of those college boys because she had drunk too much and passed out. And there was the time that... Rebecca stiffened and felt a single tear fall from her eye run and down by her nose.

...that time that Rachel had fiercely stormed up to Matt at that party and tore him apart in defense of her. What had she called him? Baby dick? Rebecca laughed out loud at the memory. Rachel had just been on her knees for him minutes earlier but she hadn't cared in the slightest. As awkward of a position as it had put her in, she'd marched right back up to him and cursed him out after hearing what he had done to her best friend.

Rebecca shook her head and felt another tear. So then why had she-? A scream of frustration exploded in her brain. God!! How could Rachel be so amazing and then go and do what she'd done to her? Of all the boys in the world! Why? Rebecca had never understood and it had eaten at her ever since that day in the parking lot when she'd cut Rachel out of her life. She hated her for it. Hated her. And she'd never get over it.

She turned her head back towards Rachel's car and saw her friend rocking in a slow trance-like motion, her fingers clutched roughly around her head. She was in agony. And she had been for months. Shit, she was failing out of school. Everyone knew. And Rebecca had been hearing of things she had been doing and the boys she'd been doing them with. She knew how Rachel was but that seemed like a new low for her. These weren't her fun, whimsically slutty adventures. She was just being used. And while Rebecca hadn't bothered to ask her about it, it seemed like Rachel didn't even care. She might have even been enjoying herself in a perverse and twisted way.

Rebecca felt herself feeling something she hadn't felt towards Rachel in a long time: regret. She had been so consumed by her anger and her own hurt. It was all she could feel. Truthfully, it had been affecting her in other areas as well. She wasn't suffering like Rachel was but she had let it seep into other parts of her life. She'd been moodier and she'd gone out socially less than she'd used to. She'd hooked up with a few boys but she didn't even really enjoy it and she'd coldly dismissed any of them who had approached her with any additional feelings.

She was tired, too. So, so tired. And she couldn't believe she was admitting it, but she missed Rachel. Part of her hurt every time she looked at her college acceptance materials or read an email from her future hockey coach. Rachel was supposed to be there with her. But now? Who knew what would become of her. She was sinking fast. And she had no one to rescue her.

Rebecca squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists. She couldn't believe what she was actually considering doing. She didn't know if she could even speak to Rachel without losing her temper but she couldn't just leave her withering there alone. She could at least go talk to her. She'd treated her like a ghost for weeks.

She knew Rachel had been putting up a smiling front and going about her business at school, but seeing her quaking in tortured pain just now made her finally see just how much she had buried deep down. She swallowed hard and turned slowly back around. The other girls had been watching her in confusion and they were nervously alternating their glances between her and each other. Rebecca shot them a smile and waved them on.

"Go. It's okay. Just something I have to do."

She walked slowly towards Rachel's car, hearing the painful sobs grow louder with every slow step. Rachel's face was buried in her hands and her whole body was shivering as she cried. Rebecca walked around to the passenger side and leaned over. She watched for a second and sighed before bringing a single finger nail to the window. Nervous that she'd surely regret it, she gave a gentle tap.

Rachel jumped at the sound and her red, tear-soaked face twisted into panicked fear as she saw Rebecca leaning into her window. She was suddenly terrified of her old friend's presence. What was she doing? Was she coming to push the knife deeper? Rachel knew she simply could not take another body blow. She wouldn't recover.

She stared wide-eyed at her old friend as the sobs continued. Her gaze moved downward as she watched Rebecca smile gently and point to the door lock. Her green eyes looked warm. It was the first time Rachel had seen that look in months.

Rachel's hands shook violently as she fumbled to press the unlock button. The sound made her flinch and she whimpered as she watched the door handle open and Rebecca climb slowly into the seat. She held her breath and tried to steady her cries as best she could.

Rebecca closed the door softly and stared straight ahead for a second, before sighing and turning to face her crying friend. She pushed her hands together into a prayer-type position and brought them to her lips. Rachel simply watched her and continued to sob nervously, unsure of what was going to happen next. Rebecca allowed the cries to die down to a low murmur before she finally spoke.

"Hi." She smiled weakly but her eyes were friendly.

Rachel let out a quick cry and smiled through her tears. Still sobbing lowly, she tried to find her voice.

"Hi."

Her breaths began coming in faster through her tears and she was on pins and needles wondering what Rebecca would do. That had been the first word she'd spoken to her in weeks, and the first friendly one since-. Rachel held her breath in. She hoped Rebecca didn't yell at her. She just couldn't take it.

Rebecca bit her lip and looked back out the windshield. She felt her own tears forming behind her eyes as the emotion hung thickly in the air. She spoke softly.

"So, um, are you still being, like, that big whore that I remember?"

Rachel felt her stomach twist painfully and she thought she might be sick. Why? Why would she come in here just to say that? She was on the edge of a cliff and Rebecca was inches from pushing her off. She sucked in her breath for what was about to be another violent outburst of pain when she whimpered and froze. Rebecca had turned back towards her with a devilish grin. The grin then broke into a teary smile. She wasn't ripping her. She was joking with her! Her first joke in months.

Rachel exploded with emotion, mostly pure relief but it was tainted by feelings of shame and guilt. Rebecca's words had been meant as a familiar tease but they had ironically hit their mark. Rachel sobbed out loudly and her face contorted into a tortured mess. Rebecca's eyes went wide with shock and she reached for her friend and pulled her head into her shoulder in a fierce hug.