All Comments on 'Raven's New Life Ch. 02'

She is blindfolded so she won't make him angry by looking. but then looks at him? Where did it go?

I like this so far. Hope there is more to Raven's story.

The chapter works well for the most part, though it has a couple of holes in it such as the sudden dissappearance of the blindfold. The master also seems to act somewhat bipolar in his sudden bouts of anger over minor non-instructed matters, I know BDSM and Non-Con are full of this sort of master who slowly thaws out but he seems really dickish at this stage.

Eye contact rules are really weird and pretty counter-intuative (he even makes a point of liking to look into her eyes whilst she cums, but also places this weird restriction in place) I really hope this is a rule he gets rid of pretty quickly as it makes scenes with any participation from our protagonist much more difficult.

5/5 stars, would like to see more with a toned down master (the wife sounds like she'll be the antagonist anyway) and maybe an editor involved. If the site had half stars I would have given this a 4.5.

p.s. Upon re-reading my above comments they may come off as a little harsh though my feelings are that this is a well written piece of erotica with the underlining hooks in place to present a well fleshed interesting story.

Where'd the necktie around her eyes go? That threw me off.

And one spelling error that drew my focus was when you wrote "sleave" instead of "sleeve".

Story's Author Here!!

I know several of you pointed out that the blindfold seemed to disappear... I'm sorry! In my hurry to get the story out, I made a few mistakes. I will do an edit and then resubmit. One person mentioned that the male seemed hot and cold, and switched quickly from calm to angry... it is because he has had a horrible marriage to a cruel woman who has made him very bitter and unhappy. Having a submissive s supposed to e his outlit; his way of having some control. He doesn't usually want any emotional contact with his submissives; no due contact, no breaking the submissive role... but for some reason, Raven pulls at his heart in a way he had never experienced. This leaves him confused and even angry... because in his experience, women are cruel and manipulative... but Raven is innocent and sweet... part of him thinks it's a ploy. I will try to make this all more clear in the edit!

The blindfold thing was minor, just watch for continuity going forward. Otherwise, great start to the story! Really looking forward to more chapters.

I'm excited to see where you take this. Don't feel you have to explain everything in your comments though. Your next installment is eagerly awaited, at least by me.

Are you planning on making more? I really liked this so far!

Eagerely awaiting for the next chapter!

Very erotic! More please!

Absolutely heart stopping sensations of passion. Please have mercy, write some more chapters of this story. And as always, thanks for sharing your talents.

More please! The story's excellent and I can't wait to see where you take them.