All Comments on 'Sara Jean Underwood and Me Ch. 01'

More. . Would love to be Sara with all those studs. . Well written.... Needing some more reading . . .

There are many errors - typos, sloppiness, punctuation, etc. in this, but :

2nd paragraph: "a butt you could literally bounce a quarter off - shoulder length blonde hair "

3rd paragraph: " She's got shoulder-length blonde hair, - Her butt is so tight you could literally bounce a quarter off it," ??

Not necessary to say it twice in a row. I'm pretty sure everyone got it the first time.

" either me or her were on our way" Poor grammar. Should be "She or I."

As for Sara, she seems to either be an experienced prostitute or has a mental problem and all these guys are willing to take advantage of it.

This story is like Schubert's 8th symphony. The unfinished one. Please finish the story! I cannot imaginr what could happen next. A whole novella could transpire. Thank you.