All Comments on 'Scream Out'

Not sure about this one.

Not sure what you were aiming for, but I think you missed.

Nice experimentation. Feels gyroscopic, though, without grounding descriptions. Remember to include other senses besides lust- taste, smell, sight, touch...are they organic or machine- or both? Where in hell are they in the Universe? What comparison do we have for their measure of time and space? Why should we care that they consummate their love? All these questions can be answered with more a little more care. You almost had an A for ingenuity but I'm forced to say without those other elements I can't. Lust can survive disorientation but it takes a lot more concentration to come. I'll keep watching for more. Don't stop writing.