Star Struck Ch. 03

I cracked my back, stretching after a tiring lunch rush. Sam had something on the earlier part of the day so I covered her shift during lunch. What I didn't expect was the endless stream of customers entering my restaurant, an odd occurrence seeing that it was a Monday. I peeked through the kitchen window into the dining area. The crowd had finally thinned out a little over half an hour ago and I could finally catch my breath a little. Normally for a crowd like that, the kitchen needed to be at full strength, but this time we were down one extremely capable pair of hands in the form of Sam.

Alas, we did make it through albeit a little worse for wear. Sam was expected to be back soon so I waited for her, stepping into my office behind the kitchen. I sat down at my desk, leaning back into the chair. I looked at the desk to my right and saw the desk of Mr Ryan Goode empty. He usually didn't stay in office long seeing that he could easily work from home so it wasn't anything strange. I did wish he were there though, so I could talk to him.

I closed my eyes and put my hands behind my head, resting my feet onto my desk. The whole of the previous night was still stuck on my mind. The nice quiet dinner, the long walk on the beach. It would have been a perfectly executed date had it been taken out of context. But of course, that was out of the question because, as I kept reminding myself, Chris McCray was straight.

A knock on the door pulled me from my thoughts. "Come in." I announced, removing my feet from the desk. The door cracked open and Sam's head popped in.

"Hey boss, I'm back. Lance told me lunch rush was crazy just now." She said.

"Yeah no kidding." I said, getting up from my chair. "So do you need me to stay around or anything?"

"Nah, I think I can manage. Besides, you handled lunch, let me handle dinner." I untied my apron, hanging it on the coat rack in the corner.

"Okay. Just call me if you need help and I'll be right down."

"Sure thing boss." Sam said, closing the door behind her.

I removed the chef's jacket and hung in together with the apron. Walking over to my desk, I got my personal belongings from my desk drawer, stuffing them into my pockets. I exited my office and walked through the kitchen, waving bye to any employees I saw.

I made my way to my car and drove home. Approaching my house, I saw a car already parked in my driveway. One look at the black jeep and I knew it was Ryan's. I was a little confused. Why was Ryan at my house? He knew I was working that afternoon and if he had wanted to see me, he would have gone down to the restaurant. I parked beside his jeep, making my way over to my door. Before opening I could make out voices from inside but I couldn't hear what they were talking about.

I slot the key in and opened my door. I saw Ryan sitting on the couch facing Chris. Chris's eyes darted to me when the door opened and his face just screamed 'HELP ME!'. I smiled and walked over to Ryan who was still talking and hadn't noticed me come in.

"Ryan what are you doing here?" I asked, dropping my keys onto the coffee table. My voice seemingly startled Ryan and he turned to face me.

"Justin!!!" He said, in mock excitement.

"I hope you're not harassing my guest with questions now."

"What? No!" He lied, pretty badly I might add. I rolled my eyes and grabbed his arm, pulling him up off the couch.

"Give us a minute." I said to Chris, who was on the verge of laughing. I pulled Ryan to the kitchen, pushing him to the sink before letting go of his arm. We were out of earshot from Chris who was in the living room.

"Ow." He exclaimed, rubbing the arm I was just squeezing. "What was that for?" I raised my eyebrow at him. "What?"

"You owe me a hundred bucks." I said, smirking.

"Oh you remember that bet?" He asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Oh yeah I remember it." I leaned onto the kitchen island behind me. "Told you I would win."

"Wait how do I know you haven't been tripping over him too? I'm pretty sure it's bothering you. I can see it on your face."

"Hey the bet was that I make a move on him. I didn't. Whatever happens in my mind doesn't count." I said.

"Whatever. Fine you win." He said, taking out his wallet and handing me a hundred bucks. "It was worth it though. Dude Amy is like more amazing than I thought. According to Chris, she's like this crazy talented, smart and funny girl. Man I think I've fallen in love."

"Well lover boy I think it's time for you to leave." I said, pushing him out of the kitchen.

"Wait what? No I have some more questions." He said, as I pushed him past Chris sitting in the living room.

"Oh no you don't." I gave him one last push to the door. He turned and looked at me, clearly irritated.

"Fine. Bye." He said, straightening his jacket, before opening the door and leaving. I turned back to Chris who was watching us.

"Sorry about that." I apologized.

"He really likes Amy doesn't he." He said.

"That's an understatement." I said, crashing onto the seat beside him.

"Well thanks for showing up then. I didn't think I could take any more questions." He said, his body going limp into the couch, feigning fatigue. I laughed. "At first I thought it was you coming back but it turned out to be Ryan."

My eyes travelled to the script sitting on the coffee table. "You were memorizing lines again?"

"Nah, just practicing them. You know, trying to get the feel of the character and what not. I've been having some problems getting it out right for some scenes." He said, grabbing the script from the table.

"Oh, do you need someone to practice with? I'm no actor but I think I can read some lines."

"Oh okay...um, hold on." He flipped through the script till he found the scene he was looking for before handing me the stack of papers. "I remember the lines so you read from the script."

"Okay. Um so..." I asked, unsure of how to do this.

"I'll start. I'm Harvey. You're Anne." He clarified. "Hey, is everything okay?" He said, already in character. I scanned the page for his line and found it. I looked at the line following for Anne.

"It's nothing." I read the line. The following line was an acting cue which read 'look distracted', which I tried to do but could have come out as a constipated look instead. I stole a glance at Chris to see if he was laughing but he wasn't, completely in character.

"You always say that. You know I can tell when you're lying."

"So what if something is bothering me, it's not anything you can help with okay." I said.

"C'mon Anne. You know I can read you like a book." He said. The following line said to look angry, so I furrowed my eyebrows and tried my best to look angry.

"Oh really. You must be illiterate then because you obviously aren't reading correct." I said. After saying it I realized it would have been better shouted but I was no professional actor. Chris lowered his head in thought, building up the tension from the scene.

"I think I do know though." He whispered, eyes transfixed on my hands. "But Anne, you and I. You know we can never be. I just don't see you that way." He took hold of my hand and I almost gasped at his touch. His eyes bore into mine and I felt like I was melting into them. For a moment, I really felt like I was Anne and this conversation was happening between Chris and myself.

"You think I don't know that? I know you won't ever like me like that but hell I didn't ask for this Harvey. You think I want to be miserable?" I said. Chris squeezed my hand tighter.

"I'm sorry Anne." He looked down, breaking eye contact with me. I looked down at the script and read the next line.

"I'm sorry too Harvey. I know a lost cause when I see one." At my words, he looked up at me.

"Look I can try. For our friendship, I can try." He said.

"You can't try to love me Harvey. It just won't work like that. I can't have you force yourself to love me just because of our friendship. I'm going to be fine." I looked at the next line but it wasn't dialogue. The line read 'Harvey slowly leans in and places a kiss on Anne's lips'.

My eyes shot up to Chris's face. His eyes stared into mine. I felt his right hand travel up to my cheek, nestling it in the palm of his hand. I was frozen. Slowly the distance between our faces shortened, his eyes closing when he was inches from my face. His lips touched mine, sending electricity flying across my body, radiating from my lips. My eyes were wide open, a marked contrast to his, which were closed shut. He moved his lips ever so slightly, each little twitch sending a buzz through my body. Slowly he pulled away, his hand dropping to his side, but I could still feel my lips tingling.

He slowly opened his eyes and took in my shocked expression. I knew actors were dedicated but this was just crazy to me. I mean the kiss could have been skipped. It's not like this was the actual filming or anything. He stared at me for close to half a minute and I stared back, unsure of what to say. Finally breaking from my trance, I looked down at the script and read my next line. "It's not the same Harv. You don't love me." My voice wavering as I said it. The line was so far from how I was feeling though. That kiss was beyond words for me.

I waited for Chris to say his next line, to continue with the scene, but he just stared at me. Without a warning, his hand travelled to the back of my head and pulled me to him. His lips crashed with mine, reigniting the dwindling flames on my lips. Out of shock, I dropped the script onto the floor. He moved his lips against mine, sucking on my lower lip. I should have pulled away and broke the kiss, but I couldn't, my arms not listening to anything by brain was asking. Instinct took over as I closed my eyes and returned the kiss. I was slowly pushed down onto the couch, Chris straddling my waist, fervently kissing my lips. I felt his tongue brush my lips, begging for entry and I tentatively opened them, allowing him entrance.

His hand behind my neck caressed the skin there, making goose bumps erupt across my skin. His other hand slipped underneath my t-shirt, running it up my belly. His mouth left mine, trailing kisses down my jawline. He hadn't shaved for a few days and his stubble tickled my skin. His mouth found the sensitive spot on my neck that never failed to drive me crazy, making me buck my hips upward. He noticed and concentrated on the area, biting and sucking the skin there.

My hands travelled up his well-muscled arms, feeling the muscles flex under my fingers. My senses were going into overload, the pressure in my jeans building to an uncomfortable level. I moaned as he continued to suck on my neck, sending wave after wave of pleasure coursing through my body.

My hands found their way under his shirt, feeling the ridges of his rock hard abs. I lightly scraped my fingernails along his skin, making him tremble. I moved further up his body, finding his right nipple, giving it a light pinch. He hissed his response, moving his lips back to capture mine again. I felt his groin rub into mine, the bulge quite noticeable through his jeans. "Justin." Chris whispered out.

Somehow hearing his voice knocked me out of it. My eyes shot open and I used all my strength to push Chris off of me. He landed on the couch, near my feet and I quickly say up right, straightening my shirt and wiping my swollen lips.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I shouted.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me." He said, smoothing his hair back with his hand.

"You're straight dude. What the hell are you doing kissing me like that?" My breathing was still ragged from the intense make out session, me trying to calm my rapidly beating heart.

"No let me explain." He said, reaching out to touch my hand. I quickly got off the couch and paced the floor, keeping my distance from him. I was confused enough as it was and his touch was not going to help.

"Explain what? Geez man, you know how much I've been trying to keep me from throwing myself at you? Then you pull a stunt like that." I shouted, not realizing that I had admitted that I had been fawning over him.

"You have?" he asked. I was confused.

"I have what?" I asked, frustration mixing with anger.

"You've been trying not to throw yourself at me?" He said, standing up and walking over to me. My face fell. I felt the blood fill my cheeks, and my eyes widened in the realization of what I had said. He walked over and placed his hands on my hips. "Because I've been trying not to throw myself at you too." He said, moving his face closer to mine, going for another kiss. I pulled away and wriggled out of his grip when I felt his breath tickle my skin.

"No. Dude need I remind you that you are straight. You date girls, not guys. You like pussy not dick."

"I never said that."

"You don't have to. My god Chris, I don't fool around with straight guys. I'm not like that okay. I don't want flings. I want a fucking relationship. Straight guys cannot provide that. Not to a gay man."

"Then calm the hell down Justin. It doesn't matter because I'm not straight." He said, crashing back onto the couch. I immediately calmed down.

"You're not?"

"No. Like I said, I date just for the publicity of it. I've never liked any of the girls I've dated." I sat down in the armchair next to the couch, processing everything he was saying. "I like you okay. I really, really like you."

"But you don't go around kissing people like that." I countered.

"Don't act like you didn't enjoy it too." I felt a blush creep up on my cheeks. "Besides, I wasn't planning on kissing you. It just happened. You offered to practice with me and I took my chance. How was I to know I would have totally lost it?"

"So you chose that scene on purpose?" I was so confused, my brain trying so hard to make sense of everything. It really screws with you when a guy you thought was straight kisses you like that.

"Well...yeah. I mean, I wanted to kiss you since last night dammit." He said. "The whole time at the restaurant I wanted to just pull you in and plant one right on your lips. Then on the beach you told me you were gay and I thought that maybe I had a chance."

I groaned. This just complicated thing even further. It was bad enough that I was falling for the straight Hollywood actor, but then finding out that he was not only gay but also trying to get to me too was just too surreal. "Do I still have a chance?" I looked up at him, finding him looking to me with those brown eyes. I wanted to say yes so badly, but a part of me just knew it wasn't a good idea.

"Chris...I...I don't know, okay? I really don't. I mean how is this going to work anyway. You move back to L.A. after this week, not to mention your job means that you are under scrutiny all the time. I don't know if I can deal with that." I said, putting my head in my hands.

He threw his head back in frustration. "I understand, but goddamn it I want you so bad."

"Let me think about it." I said, getting up from the armchair. The two halves of me were staging an all out conflict. The part that had wanted to find someone for so long, kept telling me, that it would be worth it, that I had finally found someone worth fighting for. But the other half knew that relationships with celebrities sometimes didn't last long, what with all the media attention. I shook my head and walked up to my room, shutting the door behind me, leaving Chris sitting at the couch.

I threw myself onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. I sighed, hating having to decide between what I wanted and what I was scared would happen. I had already gotten too deep with Chris and I knew if I let things go further, I was only going to fall even farther. I would not be able to handle our relationship ending after that.

My mind replayed the scene we experience on the couch a few moments back. I remembered how his touch sent my senses flying, how every single movement sent a wave of euphoria coursing through my body. I covered my face with my pillow, shouting into it. I didn't want to deal with this. I wished I had never met Chris McCray in the first place. Had he not entered my life, I wouldn't have been at my wits end thinking about it.

I sighed and got out of bed, opening my door and heading down the stairs. Chris was still seated at the couch, eyes closed, and his head thrown back into the couch. He heard my footsteps and opened his eyes. The look of hope in his eyes tore at my heart. I walked past him and grabbed my car keys from the coffee table. "I'm going out." I said, walking to the door and exiting my house. I walked to my car, unlocked it and stepped into the driver seat. I took out my phone, dialling Ryan's number. It rang a couple times before he answered.

"Hey dipstick." Ryan said, calling me one of his various nicknames for me.

I ignored his comment. "Where are you?"

"Home. You did unceremoniously evict me from yours just an hour ago. Why?" he said.

"I'm coming over." I hung up before he could protest. Stowing the phone into my pocket, I turned on the car and backed out of the driveway, heading down the familiar road to Ryan's small apartment in town. The whole journey, I kept going back and forth about Chris in my head.

I stopped in the parking lot of his apartment building, walking to the elevator. It was one of those that led right to the person's house so I buzzed him on the eighth floor. The elevator door opened and I stepped in, riding it up to his apartment, nervously tapping my feet as it ascended.

The door opened and I walked into the open living area. It was one of those open concept kind of apartments, the whole flat being one being square room. The living room sat in the middle, the kitchen stood to the left. In the right corner was a small room with a door, which was the bathroom and next to it was Ryan's bedroom. The bedroom area boasted a double bed, next to a couple of shelves and cabinets, which housed his clothes.

Ryan was seated at his couch, reading a magazine. "So what's up?" He asked, not taking his eyes off his magazine.

I walked over to the armchair next to him and sat down. "I need to talk to you."

"Yeah I figured. What do you want to talk about though?" He asked, still not taking his eyes off the magazine. I got agitated and snatched the booklet out of his hands and threw it onto the table. "That was rude."

"I have a big problem." I said.

"If it's health related I would say I told you so. Your eating habits are bound to catch up with you." I rolled my eyes. This had nothing to do with my health and I wasn't about to be lectured about my eating habits again.

"It's not that. It's about Chris."

"What about him?"

"He kissed me. Like really kissed me. Out of fucking nowhere he just came and jumped me." I said.

"No way. Really? What did you say? What did he say?" He asked.

"He said he wanted me and the thing is, I want him too." I said.

"Great timing. A little earlier and I wouldn't be a hundred bucks poorer."

"I'm serious here!" I shouted.

"Okay okay. So what's the problem here? He likes you, you like him. I don't see much of a problem."

"You fucking well know what the problem is. He's an actor and lives in L.A. You know I don't do one-night stands. I'm not going to sleep with him only to have him leave. I'm don't know what to do man." I said, covering my eyes with my hands.

"Whoa okay calm down. Does he want anything more than a quick fling?" He asked. I thought about what he said, and I think Chris did.

"From what he said, it seemed like he did. I don't know."

"Okay, so once again, what's the problem here?" I was getting frustrated with Ryan now. He wasn't helping at all.

"Ugh I just want to know what to do dammit. I don't know what to do. I would like to have a relationship with him, but I know if I do I would just fall harder when he decides to call it quits." I said.