All Comments on 'Stepsister Seduction Ch. 02'

I loved your very very descriptive story that very vividly described all of the action

I want to know if they can stop now that they have crossed this line

really good except for one thing...in ch 1..."unsure of what she was feeling in her body. Since she hadn't masturbated before, she didn't know..."

and in ch 2..."rubbing it up and down. She had masturbated before, and found that rubbing her pussy was starting to satisfy the itch. "

you need to decide whether she had or hadn't.

Story goes forward too fast for my taste. It loses some believability. Still I can't blame you for rushing it. Step-mom step-sister action is a pretty sexy visual image.

It does move a little fast. And I'm told getting hit in the eye with semen burns, so while the imagery was vivid, in reality it puts a crimp in the festivities. The continuity error with Jenna's experience was also well-taken. Work on the punctuation with their speaking, too. If you write something, sometimes it helps to sketch out the description, personality, motivations, and even quirks, so you can refer to them later.

It didn't take much for the mother to go from freaked out to spread eagle. Going a week without sex not usually sufficient motivation to break such a strong taboo, especially with their own child -- unless they are really slaves to their libido. Do you plan next to have the father discover them and join in? If he is as weak willed as the mother, he probably will, since having two pussies to plunder is too much to resist? This will satisfy many readers, but it will also make it forgettable. Why did the father miss his weekly bump with Kelly? Is he frustrated by the lack of sex? Is he banging the office help? There is hint that Kelly would like her pussy poked more often, hence her easy capitulation. A short read that has the main characters integrating in a wet, gooey, breath-taking fashion is okay. It's better when it's believable.

The story would probably have worked stronger on developing the relationship between Jenna and Tim, and seeing whether they actually did have strong feelings or whether it was just a case of "now we know and we may keep on being fuck buddies, but that's it." A lot of ways you can go with this. You learn by writing and by experiencing as well as getting good feedback.

Well-written story! I felt like I was the one having sex with my stepsister, and could hear your character's voices and thoughts. Easy to read style!

Ch. 01 was fairly well written describing the to step-siblings. It had some sort of mental progress going on for those two - although some more hints on previous erotic tension between them, at least with one of them, would have not been wrong to make the reader feel the story was moving along the "right" track.

However, I agree completely with TJSkywind: When you put the mother into the story it lost interest. Going from complete shock/horror to within minutes starting to mess around with her step-son (and thereby cheating on her husband) with her own daughter watching, just because she got to see a penis and had lost one weekend's sex, well - it is as stated in the caption - not credible.

The end was too abrupt/businesslike/simple - I didn't like it. It was like what had gone on before was something akin to the family members doing some dish washing, while in reality it was probable the most shattering experience in their life.

Im sorry, just seems like the story was written by a virgin. Got nothing out of it.

-That was an ending???

Now we have to get Tim to keep Step Mommy plastered to the Bed as he cums in her and see the emotions going through her as the three of them spend a week end together with Both women getting full loads . and step mommy trying to explain the Baby hubby could'nt give because of his Vasectomy.

Maybe Jenna needs to seduce her father, alone or with her mom.

Man I want to be fucked.. my pussy is sooo fucking wet

Why does this happen so often? The 2nd chapter was not even close to the 1st. Especially with the titty fuck. Crash and burn.

More please