Susie Ch. 05

"Kind of like a Stephen King or Michael Crichton story. Oh, the movie isEight Below.Snow Dogs was a comedy about that guy inheriting a dog team."

"Oh yeah!" I laughed. "Let's go to work.

Things went much faster when we considered 'Charles' as being Corey, 'Emily' as being me and the other two as being Howard and Travis. We also changed 'Ed's' name to 'Mark' since the rhyme of 'Ed and 'Fred' was distracting.

We thought of the pipeline like a huge snake coiling through the wilderness occasionally moving a coil in order to entice the adventurers further into its lair. They escaped by realizing that the pipeline was trying to kill them and that they needed to retreat to civilization. When they returned they discovered that they had imagined many of the problems or that they had thought them more severe than they were.

Corey and I debated whether to have 'Charles' and 'Emily' have sex. We decided that would detract from the story but we did end with them taking off their clothes and getting into a warm safe bed together.

It was after dinner time so we made our TV dinners and ate them at the table. I was surprised that I didn't feel like having sex. I just felt like relaxing with Corey.

After dinner, Corey began removing his clothes and said, "Hot tub?"

"Hot tub!" I agreed.

The sun was going down and the night was cooling off. The tub felt great and I lay with my back against Corey, stroking his thigh. He held my by the waist and stroked my tits, tummy and twat.

"Corey," I said, "I hope you won't feel disappointed, but I just want to relax with you. I don't feel like having sex right now."

Corey laughed, "This from the girl who wasn't sure she could wait until evening. I am enjoying just being here with you too. If you change your mind, signal by jumping me."

"Oh Corey, I love how you make everything so easy for me. If you decide you want sex you can signal by 'jumping me' too. I'm sure it won't take much to get me ready and willing."

We watched the sun go down and the stars come out. Then we went in and fell asleep next to each other, naked.

The dream came again. The angel carrying me and the people below shouting barely understandable suggestions for my life. This time one small voice seemed to rise above the others. I couldn't make out what it was saying or who was its owner.

I woke first and lay there looking at Corey. I reflected on this dream that came when I slept in his arms. Was he the angel? Who was the voice? What was it and the others saying? Why did I keep having it? Each time there had been more detail, maybe the answers would come. Each time the dream seemed to add detail. I looked forward to sleeping to get the answers.

I still didn't feel like I needed or wanted sex. I just wanted to be here. We had ended the story with the couple going to bed naked together. We assumed and expected the reader to assume that they would have sex. Now I knew that they would just sleep. Their shared ordeal would make them tired and all they would want would be to be next to each other. I hugged Corey lightly until he woke up.

Corey kissed me and I kissed him back. I jumped out of bed and danced for him saying, "I feel so alive! Let's have breakfast and finish that other story." I told him my thoughts about the end of the story we had just finished.

I danced some more for him, pulled on my clothes and went into the kitchen saying, "How about some oatmeal?"

During breakfast I told Corey how special last night was because we didn't have sex, "It's important that we know that we aren't together just for the sex. I think last night was the best night I have spent with you. Our sex is fabulous and I wouldn't want to do without it for long but I love just being with you and relaxing. Sex with you is definitely not relaxing. Well afterwards it's relaxing, maybe too relaxing."

"You don't need to explain," he replied. "I enjoyed just being with you too and I agree, our relationship isn't just about sex and I don't want it to become just about sex. I think that could be a problem with the guest house. It provides such easy access to sex that we could allow the sex to consume us."

Second Story (Space Station)

I gave him a big kiss, "I can't wait to work on your other story. I have some ideas. Please be sure to tell me if any don't fit with your idea of the story and what it's about. Is there any background to that story or something about the characters that I should know?"

"I don't remember any. I will tell you if I think of anything."

"Please, especially, tell me things like, 'I made this character do that because ..'."

I read the story again, handed it to Corey and said, "Here are my ideas. Most importantly I think the ending seems forced and even phony. This solar flare with all these strange properties seems unlikely and doesn't fit in. Everything your characters do ends up not mattering because this flare just fixes it all."

"Deus ex machina." he mumbled.

"What did you say?"

"Deus ex machina, a 'god from the machinery' it means a dramatic device where a god steps in and fixes things or messes them up. It's not usually a good method to use. That's exactly what it is. Like you say it makes the rest of the story kind of meaningless. I just didn't have any idea how to end it."

"Corey, it's a tragedy. You know what that means?"

"It means it's a story that ends tragically."

"More than that, a good tragedy has the actions of the characters leading inexorably to the bad end. We should allow this story to end badly with the destruction of the space station and all the astronauts. We should work on showing how the actions of the astronauts cause the result."

"That sounds good. I guess when I was writing it I was thinking they had to get out of it, the story had to have a happy ending."

"I think a tragedy needs a good 'villain', at least one character who is causing things to move to the tragic ending. Other characters need to be unable to stop him for one reason or another."

"That sounds right. How does that apply here?"

"We should pick one character to be the villain. As the story is now, the astronauts kind of at random pick solutions which seemingly at random fail or partially succeed. I suggest we have one character who always picks the failures and have others pick those which succeed or might succeed. He doesn't have to be bad or evil, just incompetent."

"But why do the others go along with his bad ideas?"

"Shakespeare usually had the bad guy be a king or someone with a lot of power. I suggest the bad guy be the boss. He's in charge because he has political connections but really doesn't know anything about the station. He can be the kind of guy who has to have it his way and only listens to those who agree with him. It might be good to have one of the astronauts be a 'yes man' who always agrees with him and shouts down any disagreement."

"That sounds really good. Where did you come up with all these ideas? You're talking like an English lit. professor."

"I don't know. Thinking about it ... I just don't know. It's like it's just inside here somewhere."

We started to work. Amazingly, not a lot of changes had to be made. We started by picking a character and putting him in charge. Then we went through and had him propose all the bad suggestions. We added some dialogue for people to object and picked another character to always take the boss's side.

As we completed the pass through the story and lunch time approached, I said, "Corey, I think there are too many characters here. We need to either reduce the number of characters or concentrate on only a few of them. I would also like to see some romantic interplay. We need a romantically involved couple like in the other story."

"Why do we need fewer characters."

"Because we want the reader to really, really care about them. It's hard to get people to care about a bunch. Better to concentrate on one or two. I think it's good to concentrate on a couple in love or falling in love. That makes you really hope for things to turn out well and heightens the sense of tragedy."

"You do need to be an English lit. professor."

"Let's think about it over lunch."

We had our sandwiches and I said, "I need to relax. Hot tub?"

We sat in the warm water, naked. Marianne came out, also naked, and waved to us. She came over and started small talk.

I interrupted, "Corey, I have an idea. We should reduce the characters to four: the boss, his sycophant, and a couple who start out as professionals but whose struggles bring them closer and closer together. I also have an idea about who to base the couple on."

I addressed Marianne, "Marianne, Corey and I are working on some stories together, we really need to get back to work."

Marianne said, "I thought you were using the guest house for some intimate time."

We got out and I told her, "There's plenty of that too." I showed my naked body to her and pointed at Corey's partially enlarged penis. "Besides, working on these stories is another kind of intimacy."

We went in and started on the story. I didn't bother to get dressed and Corey followed my example.

Role Playing

"I want to model the couple on my mommy and daddy," I said. "We can show the growing intimacy by first having them address each other by their last names and then as they work out problems together and try to counter the bad ideas of the boss they move to first names and then to occasional touches and then to little kisses and then to hugs. At the end, as the station is clearly going to disintegrate they realize their love and embrace and kiss passionately."

Corey said, "That sounds really good." We identified the couple and He started though the story making changes. Removing characters, assigning activities to the couple. I suggested changes in dialogue based on how I thought my parents might behave in these circumstances. Both had occasionally had bosses of the type I had in mind and would sometimes complain about them at home.

Corey got real good at bringing the rising intimacy into the story. "I just fantasize about how I would like you to behave if it were us and then I fantasize about my reaction," he explained.

We got into the habit of acting out the interaction between the two, kissing and touching. Sometimes the touching was a bit more intimate than the story reflected, with various sex parts involved. As we approached the end of the story we embraced passionately along with the characters except that Corey's cock found its way between my legs and nuzzled my twat as it expanded. "Mmm!" I thought.

Corey pulled away slightly and said, "the story lacks something and I think I know what it is. Please, let's get dressed, have dinner and I will tell you what I have in mind."

"Get dressed? Why?"

"I will explain over diner," Corey said as he dressed.

We heated our TV dinners and sat to eat.

Corey explained, "The situations where Apollo and Diana interact are still too dry. I think the problem is that our story just looks at them from the outside. We should be saying something about their thoughts and feelings for each other. I think that will help the reader understand them and feel for them."

I agreed, "But why get dressed, I was enjoying playing the parts naked, feeling your body next to mine."

"I did too. What I suggest is that we go back through the story and play the parts again. This time we can discuss our feelings and Apollo and Diana's possible feelings and add them to the story. Since they are clothed in thick flight suits we can better think about what they might be feeling and thinking with less explicit sexual undercurrent. I suggested dinner so we would calm down a bit. That way we won't start with a huge sexual excitement."

I thought about it and decided he was right. "I agree! Let's do it. You be Apollo and I'll be Diana."

The changes went much more quickly than I imagined. We really got into the acting. We decided not to add great detail, just a few words about how one or another of them felt as they touched hands, then hugged, and finally kissed.

We reached the final scene when Diana and Apollo look at the status display and decide the end has come. They strip off their outer suits and embrace in their underwear. Corey and I took off our outer clothes and embraced.

"Corey," I said, "I'm ready."

"Me too," he replied.

We left our underwear on the floor on the way to the bedroom.

We lay down with my twat in his face and his beast in mine. He slowly and tenderly kissed me, pushing his tongue up my vagina and bringing it out to lick my clit. The orgasmic tingle began quickly.

With difficulty I concentrated on bathing the beast with my tongue. I could barely get the helmet of his cock in my mouth. I licked at his pee hole. I put my tongue under his foreskin and moved it around and around.

As I felt my clit beginning to send orgasmic signals to the rest of my body I reached for a condom and tore open the wrapper. As I did so, Corey picked up the lubricant and I could feel him push some inside me and resume his kissing. I had an idea! I rolled his foreskin back over the body of his cock and rolled the condom over it. The pressure of the condom held the foreskin back and away from the tip exposing the pinker skin next to the tip which was usually covered. I thought "That will make him more sensitive, I hope he will enjoy it."

As soon as I finished, Corey handed me the lubricant and I spread a drop over the cock.

Before he could move on top of me I pushed him gently onto his back and mounted the beast. It slid in smoothly without complaint. Corey made a noise I Hadn't heard before. "Whooh! That feels amazingly good! Did you do something?"

"I'll tell you later, just relax and enjoy yourself."

I began to ride him slowly, up and down, back and forth, side to side. As I slid off his cock and then on again, he made the whistling moan, "whooh! whooh! whooh! whooh!" I could feel a throbbing. He wasn't going to last long at this rate. I decided to give him immediate intense pleasure and not to wait for my orgasm. I began to rock, roll and pump faster and with a bit more intensity.

"Susie!" pump "if," roll "you," rock "keep," pump "this," rock "up," pump "I'll," roll, "cum," pump, "before," roll, "you," rock. Each word was said with the whistling sound he kept making.

The whistle became more and more intense. I told him, "I," pump "Know," rock "just," pump "relax," roll, "and," pump "enjoy," rock " it."

I felt his cock spasm inside me and I pushed my twat hard against him. "Whooaagh!" or some such amazing sound came out of his mouth.

I felt his ejaculation come swooshing through his cock. I began pumping hard and fast.

He was screaming with each pump, "Susie! Susie! No, No, Aagh! Susie! Aagh! No! No! I .... Aagh! cant ... Aagh! ... stand ... Aagh! ... this ... Aagh! ... Susie!"

I hadn't been aware of my own feelings and I was suddenly surprised when my vagina gave a huge spasm. I almost jumped off his cock but the spasming vagina held it in place, "Oohh!" I exclaimed and Corey joined with his own "Aagh!" I couldn't control my movements and collapsed on his chest as vaginal spasms rocked through me. I was aware of nothing but my pulsations.

Finally the spasms went away, replaced by pleasant, tingling twitches. Corey said, "That was intense! I wasn't sure I would live through it! Why didn't you stop? The feeling was unbearable but you kept going!"

I asked him, "Unbearable pain?"

"No more like unbearable pleasure but unbearable, nonetheless."

"I wanted you to have the most intense pleasure you could possibly have," I said.

"Well I don't think I would live through anything more intense. My penis gets really sensitive when I ejaculate but it was exceptionally sensitive tonight."

Then he added, "And when your orgasm came! I couldn't have imagined the intensity. Now I am not sure I can remember it accurately."

I gave him a huge, long kiss and then told him what I had done with his foreskin.

"Next time you might warn me," he said.

"No, I think I will make it a surprise again."

"Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh." He said.

We lay in a passionate post-coital embrace.

Enhanced Ending

Much later Corey moved away and said, "I have a great idea about how to end the story."

"You want to change the ending?"

"No, it's more of an embellishment. I need to go add it so I won't forget." He pulled his penis out of me and got up. he went into the bathroom and I started to get up to follow him. He said, "Susan, please wait here, I would like you to see it in the morning when you are fresh. I think you will like it. Although it may need your special touch to make it perfect."

he went out to make the change and I went into the bathroom, came out and lay down spread-eagle on the bed thinking, "Oh, I love having sex with him!"

He returned. We kissed and hugged and caressed and explored each other's body until we fell asleep.

The dream came once again, the angel carrying me and the people below. The small voice again rose above the others. It was quieter that the others but my attention was drawn to it. I recognized the owner and woke suddenly startled and sweating. "Why this person?" I thought to myself. "And what is she telling me?" I had some trouble returning to sleep and when I did the dream didn't return.

I woke before Corey. I looked at him and wondered whether to tell him about my dream. I decided not to.

I remembered the stories. I debated whether to go read Corey's revised ending but decided it would be best to let him show it to me. He seemed so proud of it and so sure I would like it. I leaned over and gave him the slightest kiss. He came awake, grabbed me and turned my 'slightest kiss' into a strong passionate one. "Let me show you what I did last night!"

He showed me and I was wowed. "this is great!" I said. "It pulls everything together and gives me a satisfied feeling that the tragic ending is not a complete tragedy."

"I thought you'd like it! Something about my sexual experience last night, thinking I couldn't possibly live through such intense pleasure made me think of it."

Let's finish this off," I said. "we still need to add any thoughts and feelings for the final embrace. They can lead into this fabulous ending!"

It didn't take long and we had a final work. I jumped Corey and pulled him to bed. We were already naked and were caressing and licking and kissing and feeling our most sensitive areas before we reached the bed.

I let Corey roll me on my back and place a pillow under my butt so my twat pointed to the ceiling. He licked the exposed vulva and inserted his fingers, caressing my G-spot and rubbing my clit with his thumb. "Oohh he knows how to do this!" I thought as the tingle of an orgasm came to me once again.

He paused his licking and sucking long enough to say, "You took charge last night, now it's my turn."

The tingling grew and grew and grew filling my entire body. Then the releasing spasms shook my body and vagina. Corey continued fingering inside, kissing the outside and moving his thumb on my clit prolonging my orgasm.

As the orgasm died he didn't mount me like he usually does. Instead he rose and give me a passionate kiss. Instead of inserting the beast he moved down and worked my tits with his tongue. They swelled and hardened until I could barely stand it. He kissed my tummy, moving down, once again to my twat. Again he began fingering, licking, kissing and sucking. Again the tingle of an orgasm began to rise. This time he would move up and kiss my lips or caress my tits before moving back down to my crotch. The orgasmic feelings rose, fell, rose and fell. Each rise was more intense than the last. I arched my back and curled my toes as the feeling rose to its ultimate intensity and then released again.