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- COMMENTS
Anonymousabout 3 years agoI agree with everything that nthusiastic said. This is excellent writing. Don’t be discouraged by the nay-sayers that didn’t get what you were trying to accomplish. You accomplished it, from the accents to the plotting to the sex. Personally, I’d like the story to take a much filthier and disgusting turn, but I’ll be happy to read whatever your muse commands you to write!
nthusiasticabout 6 years agoI loved all the sound-effects written in! Between those and the superb rendering of the New York accent & speech patterns, I could truly hear them. Proper grammar would have ruined this. Doing it this way is so much harder. Most writers who attempt it fail miserably, either by overdoing it or doing it inconsistently. The details of the era were wonderful & period-correct, adding much to the authentic flavor of this submission. 5 stars & I'm adding you to my favorite authors. Thank you!
Anonymousabout 6 years agoWriting in the vernacular is difficult, but you seemed to get it. Its an easy read because of the phonetics. Good work.
