by gspanker051
I tried to publish a story years ago. It was not accepted. How then does rubbish like this get accepted for publishing?
Once you graduate from Junior High and can write a sentence that's even close to being grammatically correct, try again. By then, some of your teenage fantasies may be worth hearing about. Until then, go back to your video games.
it's not bad at all especially for a first story.
Have you written any other stores yet that you didn't publish or is this really the first story you've ever written?
Keep writing and improve the parts that people don't like, previous comment said grammar (english isn't my first language so i didn't notice any errors at all)
Anyway good luck on your next story
me
Hopefully it will NOT be continued. Bad grammar, bad spelling, bad sentence structure, just plain bad all the way around.
The bad grammar and punctuation in the first paragraph kept me from reading any further. You NEED an editor.
Okay. Is not bad story time. Is good story time. Best. Okay. I like this good story time more if she mistress her make poop. Okay. Make poop good. I like make. 1 poop in morning. But 2 poop in morning better. Poop in afternoon not oggd at work. Is bad to. Make poop at work. Dirty bathroom dirty. Okay. Sometime no ass paper for ass. I no like use hand. So i use sock then wash off poop in sink. Cow orkers don't knowing. Haha. Wet sock in shoe not bad is good like this story time. okay. I like poop make in clean bathroom with ass paper for ass. Can i come your house for make poop? Okay.
Now, tell me that paragraph above didn't make more sense than this horrible fucking story? Hmmm?
Sounds like you need a bit more practice writing. Some of the ideas here are hot. :) Try again, get an editor, and maybe we'll see you around Literotica some more.