The Jackie Bailey Chronicles

"I enjoy spending time with you too," Jackie admitted with a shy smile. "I'm very happy you almost knocked me off my feet." Jackie smiled sheepishly at Shane. The dark haired woman chuckled softly.

"Maybe after some time I could really sweep you off your feet," Shane commented keeping Jackie's gaze.

"You already have..." Jackie stated, trailing off, averting her eyes. "I just need some time to sort a few things on my own before we can..." Jackie looked up at Shane. "...start a relationship." Shane smiled softly squeezing their hands still in her jacket pocket.

"I understand completely Jackie. We can just take it slow and hang out until we're both ready for a relationship. I have my own things to sort out too."

"I agree besides... there's a lot more I want to know about you. How'd you know that I was in trouble at the club with that butch?" Jackie asked. Shane's face turned serious for a moment.

"I saw the fear and pain in your eyes. I figured that you had a rough time... maybe as a teen. I just felt this... burning... need to protect you." Jackie settled her head on Shane's shoulder.

"I'm glad you did. I have very bad memories of an intimidating person who smelled of rum."

"I figured that might be the case. You don't have to talk about it, not tonight." The waitress came around to take their orders. They spent an hour and a half talking about small non-essential little things and walked home together. They found out that they lived in the same apartment building, Shane on the second floor and Jackie on the third. Shane had the apartment right beneath Jackie's.

Three weeks passed. Jackie and Shane met every day for lunch, taking their time to get to know one another. Jackie had permanently changed lunch hours with Beverley so she could meet her new friend for lunch. Beverley just smiled happily, knowing that Jackie had met someone she really liked. Jackie had never had a relationship because of the fear she had developed toward men and any more intimidating partners. Somehow Shane seemed different to Jackie. The woman was strong, no doubt, but she was patient and understanding as well. She didn't push.

Shane was strong but not intimidating. Jackie revelled in their small innuendo-filled flirtations; she knew that she would eventually let Shane completely into her heart. Shane seemed to enjoy her company. She made Jackie laugh a lot.

Then the phone calls from Nathan became more frequent and demanding. He would scowl at her and threaten her with death. Jackie had a land line put into her office that would give her the identity of her caller and record any calls at the press of a button.

Her friendship with Shane grew from longer than needed hand shakes to longer than needed hugs. They went out to the lesbian club every Friday night. Jackie grew even closer to Shane when they danced together.

One night after locking up the offices, the redhead headed home after a long day of countless errors and complaints about a new employee. Jackie stepped into the cold winter's night after greeting James as she usually did. She pulled the collar of her coat up around her neck. It was early December and growing colder every day.

She felt a soft flake flutter onto her cheek from above. She looked up. She held her hands out to catch the snowflakes and smiled. She always enjoyed snowy winters. She walked left from the doors of the firm. A feeling of unease seeped into her happiness. She shivered.

She stood still trying to listen. Footsteps sounded behind her, and stopped as she stopped. She continued walking. She saw the lights of the gym on. The doors were open. It was the closest to safety she could think of. Jackie quickened her pace as she crossed the street.

She noticed that the footsteps behind her quickened as well. While crossing the street, she looked back over her shoulder. She saw a shadowy figure following her across the street. The form of the shadow was unmistakable; it was Nathan. She stumbled through the gym doors. She turned and faced the doors as she walked backward into the gym. Nathan stopped at the door. The light showed a smug and hungry grin spread across his face. He started to take a step inside, and froze. Jackie took one more step backward, right into someone's arms.

"Hey, slow down there, Honey." She turned on her heels facing Shane with tear-filled eyes. She sagged in relief to see and feel her friend. Shane put her hands on Jackie's shoulders, looked into her eyes, and looked toward the door at the man standing there. "Is that man bugging you Jackie?" Jackie shook her head abruptly still shaking in fear while trying to blink her tears away.

"No... yes... no..." Shane let go of Jackie and walked toward the door. She rolled her sleeves up her arms. She could smell rum in the air around the man as she reached the door.

"I think you better leave before I call the cops," Shane said calmly, her fists opening and closing at her sides.

The man turned and ran into the darkness without saying a word. Shane stood at the door watching him run like a coward, then closed and locked the doors. She turned to face Jackie and walked slowly toward the fear-filled woman, unrolling her sleeves. Jackie ran into her arms. She clutched her chest tightly and hid her face in Shane's neck.

"It looked like you knew him. Who was he?" Shane thought back to the intimidating way he looked at Jackie from the door. The sickly smell of rum clung to him like a cologne. He had a dominating aura about him. Jackie answered in a shaky voice, wanting to lie but told the truth instead.

"He is my father." Jackie cried into her shoulder. Shane stood there holding the woman trying to comfort her by rubbing her back.

"Come with me... I'll make you some hot chocolate, my treat."

Jackie reluctantly let go of Shane's firm body and wiped at her tears. She met the other woman's concerned gaze. "Thank you, but I don't want to be a bother." Shane smiled lightly at the woman. She grasped Jackie's chin softly to keep their eyes locked.

"You're no bother. I rarely get any visitors or damsels in distress stumbling into my arms. I could use the company." Jackie smiled back.

"Sure, why not. I could use a chaperone to get me home afterward." She smiled shyly, and then looked down at her feet while fiddling with her hands. Shane smiled, adoring the shyness of the woman standing in front of her.

"I will walk you home. I won't let you walk alone with him out there." Shane wiped the tears from Jackie's cheeks and eyes, and then led her to the back of the gym.

Jackie followed Shane into a small kitchenette beside an office. She looked through the open door as they passed the tiny office. She saw trophies on a shelf and frames with certificates on the walls. A belt hung on the wall on hooks underneath a few photographs of Shane and some other people handing her the awards. Shane prepared two cups in front of a boiling kettle. She had a container of small marshmallows, a can of whipped cream and a small shaker with cinnamon beside the cups on the counter. Jackie leaned her back against the counter looking at the main doors.

"Would you mind if I asked why you are so afraid of your father?" Shane looked at the woman's face. There was pain and sadness in her eyes. "You don't have to if you don't want to." Jackie looked at the floor then met her gaze. The woman deserved to know the whole truth about her. Jackie was afraid that Shane wouldn't look at her the same way again. If she knew what her father had done to her.

"I don't mind. My therapist said that it would help me if I talked to friends about my past. Is there somewhere we can sit and talk? It might take a while."

"I have a couch in my office. We could sit there," Shane answered. She poured hot water into the cups, stirred the mixture, sprayed a dollop of cream from the can, put a few marshmallows on top and added a dash of cinnamon. She handed Jackie a cup and pointed her hand toward the door. "Shall we?"

Jackie nodded and followed Shane to her office, where they sat on the couch as she told her horrific story. She told from the day her mother died to the day she left Kempton.

Jackie started secretly working at the age of sixteen everyday after school. She saved the money she had made. It was her escape fund. From the age of fourteen till the day she left, after she had finished high school, Nathan had abused her. Every night was the same, a vicious cycle of a horrific nightmare that didn't end. After finishing their hot chocolate, they walked home together. She continued:

"I changed my name from Jacqueline to Jackie and my surname to my mother's maiden name, Bailey. I was very lucky the day I got here in Boston. I quickly found a small cheap place to stay." Jackie breathed in the icy cold air, feeling much better to get all this out.

"After saving for two years, I had enough money to keep me going for a few weeks. I found a job at an accountant's office as a filing clerk. That's when I met Beverley, my business partner. I worked there for a few months. I noticed that I have a knack for numbers so I started going to night classes. When I got my degree, I applied for a higher paying job at the same firm and worked my way up the ladder. Five years ago, Beverley and I had saved up enough money to start our own business. I got myself a new, bigger apartment. The business is still going strong and I was happy until..." Jackie trailed off remembering the day Nathan first called her after all those years.

"Your father found you," Shane finished her sentence.

Their eyes met and Jackie nodded sorrowfully. "You don't deserve what he did to you. You are a warm hearted and good spirited person," Shane stated, smiling brightly. Jackie's breath caught in her throat at that stunning smile. Without realising it, they had reached Jackie's apartment door. Jackie looked at the number on the door then back at Shane.

"Would you like to come in?"

Shane stared into those brown-green eyes for a second then smiled lopsidedly. "I would love to but I have a feeling that if I go in I won't be leaving any time soon. So I bid you a very good night and hope to see you tomorrow morning. I'll walk with you to work." Shane bowed her head to the woman who was smiling at her silly antics.

"You're feeling was correct... sort of." Jackie screwed her eyes at Shane then smiled lopsidedly. "I will see you tomorrow morning then. I'm not going to argue to get myself out of walking with you, because I want. I want to know a little more about you." Shane chuckled lightly at their little flirtations.

"Have a very good night, Jackie." Jackie looked at the woman while biting her lower lip. She so wanted to kiss those full luscious lips. She leaned toward Shane and kissed her cheek instead.

"Thank you for walking me home Shane, and for being a good listener."

Shane smiled as her cheeks coloured slightly from the kiss. "No problem at all, I was happy to lend a hand and an ear or two." Shane leaned forward and kissed Jackie on her cheek. Jackie smiled shyly at her as her own cheeks flushed. Shane watched as Jackie unlocked her door and stepped into her apartment.

"Good night Shane. See you in the morning." Shane turned toward the elevator as Jackie closed her door, a smile on her plump kissable lips.

Later that night, Jackie had another of her many nightmares. They were more horrific memories that haunted her dreams. She was so tired after her night that she had forgotten to take her tablets.

******

She was hiding in a secret compartment under the stairs to the basement, a place she found while playing hide and seek with her mother. She tried to be as quiet as she could between sniffs and hiccups. Her father had found out that she was working. He had followed her after school to her job as a waitress in a small hidden diner next to the highway.

He was furious with her. Nathan had dragged her out of the diner by her hair, threw her in the passenger side of the truck and driven her home. While he was parking the truck outside the house, she took the opportunity to get out of the moving truck and scampered into the house before he even figured what was happening.

She was now holding her legs up, knees under her chin while rocking her tiny body. She needed to calm herself down so he wouldn't hear her. His booming anger-filled voice echoed in the house as he called for her.

His footsteps sounded loudly on the old creaking hard wood floors and thumped down the passage to the bedrooms. "It's just a few more days to go," she whispered to herself. She focused on remembering the sound of her mother's voice, knowing that it always calmed her down. She was suddenly startled by the old stairs creaking above her head. Jackie took in a sharp breath filled with dust, mould and fear. The creaking stopped. A hand reached through the gaps in the steps. A firm grip seized her hair. She screamed.

With an unimaginable strength, Nathan pulled her through the steps, shattering them into splinters. Bits spread over the cold cement floor. She landed with a thud on the corner of the bottom step. She hit the back of her head. She scampered into a corner across the stairs. A sharp pain coursed through her body from her backside and her head to her stomach as a big boot pinned her in place. Unable to move, Jackie clutched her eyes shut waiting for the blows she knew were coming. One eye opened slightly to see a huge hand rise and come down viciously hard.

******

Jackie awoke screaming in fear from her horrific dream. Her body was sopping wet. Sweat covered her body. She was shaking uncontrollably. She breathed in short sharp gasps. She looked around the darkened room for her attacker. A knock on her door startled her. She got up. She put on a robe and headed swiftly to the door. She looked through the peep hole, and then sighed in relief. She opened the door for the woman standing in front of her. She looked wonderful in a pair of red passion killers with puppies all over the soft material, thick red socks on her feet.

"Are you alright? I heard you screaming," Shane asked. She placed her hands on Jackie's shoulders. She met those brown-green eyes for a moment, looked into the apartment searching for anyone else. Jackie sighed as she gathered her thoughts.

"I just had a bad dream. Did I wake you? I'm so sorry." Jackie asked out of concern. Shane met her gaze and smiled.

"No, you didn't wake me. I couldn't sleep after the day I had. Would you like some company?" Concern permeated her hazel eyes. She wants to be there for Jackie. She will do anything to win the woman's heart.

Jackie nodded and stepped out of the way. Shane entered and waited for Jackie. "Would you like some coffee or tea?" Jackie walked toward the kitchen switching on every light in the apartment along the way.

"Some coffee would be nice, thanks." Shane answered at the kitchen door. She watched Jackie shaking as she went about her business.

"Please sit down? I promise I won't bite you." Jackie said, looking over her shoulder, trying to smile. Shane returned a small smile while sitting at the small table.

"Do you have the nightmares often?" Jackie walked toward her with two full cups of coffee. She looked gloomy and tired. Shane couldn't understand what the woman was going through or why any person would hurt such a wonderful woman.

"I get them whenever I forget to take my pills before I go to bed." Jackie sat down across from Shane. She placed one cup in front of her friend.

"The nightmares don't get any easier, I know," Shane stated. She curled both her hands around the cup in front of her. A painful look flicker across those beautiful hazel eyes.

"It sounds like you have your own past haunting you." Jackie blew into her cup then took a quick sip while looking at Shane. Jackie wanted to hear about Shane's past. It could help to take her mind off her own nightmares. Shane sighed loudly and took a quick sip from her cup.

"Yeah, my younger sister..." Shane looked sorrowfully at the redhead as she trailed off.

"We were out swimming in the lake at our cabin while on holiday. I was thirteen at the time and she was seven. I asked her to wait for me before she went in. She couldn't swim that well yet. I went into the cabin to tell our parents that we were going to swim and to fetch some towels." Shane took a sip of her coffee. Jackie's hand stretched over the table, settling over one of hers.

The reassuring touch sent a shiver down her spine. They stared at one another for a while before she continued telling her story.

"She was waiting on the deck when I walked down. She turned to look at me. She slipped. She hit her neck against one of the posts and fell into the water. I dropped everything, screaming for my parents. I rushed over and dove in. I grabbed her and got her out. I tried CPR but it didn't work. We later found out that she had broken her neck. She was dead before she even hit the water. My parents blamed me for months after that, years even, saying that I knew not to leave her alone. She hadn't been anywhere near the water when I left her. That whole scene keeps playing over and over in my dreams, haunting me. I haven't been in the water ever since that day. I see her there." Jackie gently squeezed her hand.

"It wasn't your fault Shane. No matter what we do, we will always lose someone we love, in one way or another. It is just their time to go. I lost my father the same day my mother died. He changed into a monster, the total opposite of who he truly was. It's the memories of my mother that keep me holding onto the promise of better days. I look just like her. I think that's why Nathan started..." Jackie trailed off lowering her head to hide fresh tears. Shane moved her chair closer to Jackie and wrapped her arms around the woman.

"Shhh... you don't have to finish that sentence. I'm here for you. He won't hurt you anymore." Jackie wrapped her arms around Shane's waist and held her close. They cried together.

Jackie made them more coffee. They went to sit in the living room on the sofa. They sat talking about the happier days they had as children, Shane of the times with her sister and Jackie of her mother. "She used to make us hot chocolate just like you made it earlier tonight. I used to sit on her lap under a blanket and listen to her reading me stories while we drank our hot chocolate." Jackie smiled at the memory, leaning her head back against the sofa.

"I used to make it for my sister and me. We used to sit beside the fireplace under a blanket drinking our hot chocolate while watching cartoons on television." Shane looked at her empty coffee cup and set it on the coffee table in front of the sofa.

"I should probably get going," Shane said. She felt a hand on her arm as she moved forward on the sofa. She looked at Jackie's hand, and then into her eyes.

"Please stay with me tonight? I don't want to be alone." Jackie let go of Shane's arm and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. She looked away.

Shane remembered the small hints during their few weeks of friendship; the tender touches, soft undertones of innuendo, gentle kisses on the cheek, the quick sparkling glances. The Jackie at those times was confident and happy. The Jackie she saw tonight was scared and unsure. Shane smiled lightly at the redhead and sighed.

"Sure... I can stay as long as you need me to." A grin grew on the redhead's lips, stretching from ear to ear. Shane's heart leaped. "There's that smile I like so much," she said out loud, making Jackie blush.

After a few more minutes of talking and then a movie, Jackie went to bed leaving a sleeping Shane on the sofa cuddled under a thick blanket. Jackie still couldn't sleep. She couldn't take her pill at that time. She wouldn't wake up for work. She got up and walked into the living room in her flannel pyjamas not even bothering with a robe. She sat on the coffee table and watched Shane sleep. She got up, walked a bit closer and nudged Shane to move over. Shane moved sleepily onto her side making space for her. Jackie got under the thick blanket and cuddled close to Shane's warm firm body. Shane draped her arm over Jackie's waist. She smiled at her, peeking through one open eye.