All Comments on 'The Little Minx That Killed Me Ch. 03'

You may wish to use them...

I do use commas, but there are times I either feel I overuse them or miss them in the editing process. I usually read these two or more times before posting, and even then there are little things I almost always miss.

Thank you also for the picture.

Dear Sir,

I hope you are not as wet in real life as you appear in your writing. You seem like a man who could not make a decision or is scared of onions.

I found Ch. 02 to be a bit more tease, than please on the sex, but this was much better in that they actually got some action.

I'm puzzled though as to what he can or can't do with those casts on his arms. He can't hold a comb, nor turn on a lamp, but he can hold a beer and eat corn on the cob. Emma comes to get him for the cook-out and he has a bottle of wine precariously perched under his right arm, then suddenly he has his arms wrapped around her. What happened to the bottle of wine? It was never mentioned again. There are lots of other similar discrepancies.

The father knocked him out for being with Emma, then is suddenly accepting enough to let her stay the night with him, especially after the cop warns John of the father's temper? That doesn't ring true to me.

The shower massaged his face, not "messaged", and how exactly is he able to take showers with both arms in casts? How did he manage to cover them, if he was by himself?

And lastly, Emma peeked around the door, not "peaked".

Still, as an older, single man, myself, there is something appealing about a story where a beautiful young woman can fall in love with an average, older man. But, isn't that what fantasies are all about?

I'd like to see this continue, but please award your readers with at least one sex act per chapter to keep our libidos up. ;-) I can't wait until he gets the casts off and the real action can begin.

This was so bloody adorable,, it was shocking that he proposed