All Comments on 'The Old Man & The Hot Young Redhead'

by rilysilywily

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  • 13 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
kind of

Kind of 90-15 % kind of thing but I guess if we are actually thinking this then it could probably really happen as I have heard of far off wackier things happening.!****

You could have gone into more detail as far as what this and that really looked like ~~

ect.! ( "5" ) ATW..

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
where do i get this game?

Good storytelling. A bit more description would be greaAt but overall good story.

lefriclefricalmost 8 years ago
!!!!!

Too! Many! Exclamation! Points! Or are your characters shouting all the time!

Very! Distracting!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
Great as it is!

A very nice and sexy story as it is. I read for enjoyment, not to critique authors.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago

Sexxxyyyy!

prop69prop69almost 8 years ago
I am old..

I need a honey this young and horny

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
4

Where can we get this game?

Paxo1944Paxo1944almost 8 years ago
Awsome

A great story, as one of your other readers said "where can you get that game". It would be greater if there was a 2nd or 3rd part.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
DELIGHTFUL!!

Lovely fantasy ~ would love to hear about "next Tuesday"!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
Exclamationmarkitis

Hi, nice story!

Not to be too hard, but I think you use explamations marks rather excessively. Yes, I've seen that with many other authors as well. However, you tend not to see that with the highest ranked authors. If you stress everything, it does lose its meaning.

Keep on writing!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago
MORE!

Bloody well written, loved it! More please.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

I like every part id it. Do more:::

Huggie28Huggie28about 2 months ago

Poor writing of a pretty good story. An editor (or at a minimum a proofreader) would be useful.

Loose=/=lose.

Anonymous
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