All Comments on 'The Sales Convention'

Not too bad for a first story attempt. It is just so easy to get the odd word wrong and usually it doesn't matter. However, when Jame's wife, very early in the story, suddenly feels her own cock you know all is not well. Early doors no doubt to a very successful erotic writing career in Literotica. Good luck and as most wives say,"Keep it up Darling."

Only spoilt by the silly typos, you will an editor if you can't be bothered to re read and edit the stories yourself.

Otherwise interesting starter story.

M

I hope there is a follow up for the rest of the weekend! More teasing?

I h those of us who do envy you good honey folks. Please do a follow up, It really sounds hot !

I originally tried to write this from two points-of-view - mine and my boyfriend's. I couldn't make that work, so I changed it to my POV only, and in the process messed up some things. I will be more careful about proof reading in the future.

I am working on the rest of this story, and I have already submitted another. Plus I am waiting for my profile pictures to be approved! I'm excited to be meeting people here on Literotica.

"As we wandered through the crowd I spotted a few acquaintances from previous years, and we exchanged polite greetings."

This is a huge leap from his telling her about previous conventions. she doesn't know anyone from previous conventions as she's never been to one, correct?

Follow your timeline

Better yet, have someone else proof read it for you. Your own eyes will skip over the errors because you know what you meant to write. Spell checker doesn't catch the errors you made, for example:

"He began to undo my zipper, but I pulled away. I found YOUR purse and retrieved a chip, quickly sliding it between my breasts. "Your turn," I said, "I want my lover to experience what those other men did."

I pulled out the desk chair in our sitting room, and sat with YOUR back to him."

It made me think, wait, did a third person come into their room?