The Strangeness Within Pt. 03

Esther nodded. "Thank you," she said. "That sounds like it will take a lot of time to figure out."

"Probably," agreed Nicola. "Abuela or Mark might be able to suggest something to practice. But maybe it's just fundamentally difficult for you. Everyone like us has different strengths. Mark is amazing at that sort of body-sense, much better than me. So, what can you do then?"

"What do you mean?" Esther asked.

"You obviously have the changes," said Nicola. "Surely you've noticed some ways you're unusual, besides your eyes and whatever pretty patterns you've got hidden under those clothes."

Esther swallowed uncomfortably. The changes.

"I've got a really good memory," she said.

"Oh?" asked Nicola. "Same here. I was bored out of my gourd in school. Surely there's more, though, right?"

"Math," Esther said reluctantly. "It comes really easily. The very abstract stuff."

Nicola waited for a minute and then started to laugh.

"Seriously? That's your big skill? Christ, I always found math easy enough but it was just about the most boring thing I could imagine thinking about all day. And that's it? Nothing else that could be useful?"

Esther shook her head with embarrassment. Nicola put on a sympathetic expression.

"Well, like I said, everyone has different strengths. And Abuela will help you hone yours. That's what she does. She says I'm almost ready to leave if I want, but I'm sure there's more I can learn from her."

"What can you do, then?" Esther asked innocently.

Nicola smiled in satisfaction. "Oh, a lot," she said casually. "I see how things fit together. Or maybe it's better to say I can hear and feel it. Stand still a moment."

The other woman closed her eyes and put her hands on the log she'd been sealing, cocking her head as though listening. A slight noise came from her, and Esther realized Nicola was humming softly, the odd melody slipping away from Esther's grasp. It was a beautiful and wholly unexpected sound.

"There is a gap in the sealant, perhaps one hundred microns," she said after while. "A small line of popped bubbles that I should fix. There's some old termite damage inside the log, but only some harmless mites and a spider on the inside now."

Esther opened her mouth in astonishment. "That's extraordinary. You can hear that? Or feel it?"

"Some combination," said Nicola, pleased with the praise. "It's not so much about whether you can sense the information. Even ordinary people can probably physically detect some of the sensations. It's about sorting through it all. I'll tell you my theory. You know the brain does all this signal processing for the senses, right? In ordinary people the nerves and the brain throw out a lot of information as if it were random noise. I think our minds can rewire that, and if you're smart enough you can learn to pick out the bits that you care about."

"Wow," said Esther, her thoughts racing. "So is that what it feels like when you do it?"

Nicola sighed. "No," she said. "I just hear what I want to hear. I can't tell what my brain might be doing. But I've gotten much better with practice, and Abuela has a lot of exercises."

"Is that what she does, too?" Esther asked. "Listening and feeling, really sensitively?"

Nicola looked uncomfortable.

"That's part of it, no doubt. Listen, let's get ourselves lunch and talk about what chores you can do more easily. Not a lot that requires abstract mathematics, I'm afraid."

...*** Chapter 14 ***...

It was a gray, ugly morning, but the rain hadn't begun yet. Javier flipped up his hood and began jogging, his backpack bouncing annoyingly on his back.

Just like he used to do it, before he got the old station wagon. He never thought he'd miss that car so much. Most likely it was scattered in parts around the state by now.

He could feel everyone's eyes on him when he arrived. When he passed red-haired Samantha in the hall she stared at him as though she'd seen a ghost. And maybe she had. Nothing about this seemed real after the last weeks. He took notes and tried to slip back into the routine, but all he could think about was Esther.

Billy and Rodrigo found him at lunch.

"Hey," said Rodrigo. "Long time no see."

"Yeah," Javier said, sighing.

"I guess you heard about the team," said Billy. "Tough luck. It won't be the same without you. Hasn't been."

"I missed two games and a lot of practice," said Javier. "I really shouldn't have expected to keep my spot. Maybe it's just as well. Don't know how I'm ever going to catch up with all this work."

The pair nodded sympathetically. There was an awkward silence.

"Javier," Billy said. "What the hell happened? You OK, man?"

Javier swallowed. Now was as good a time as any to try out his story. Billy would spread it faster than anyone.

"You know Esther's father died," he said.

"Yeah," said Rodrigo. "I heard you were there trying to do CPR. That's really rough."

Javier rubbed his face, feeling terrible about what he was doing. But it was for Esther.

"She kind of flipped out," he said. "I guess I understood. First her mom, then her dad six months later. She kept telling me she had to get out of town, and I half thought she was going to get on the road and walk. I guess I was pretty fucked up too. Never been right there when someone died. And, well, I was still pretty upset about Clara. Somehow just getting on the freeway and driving with her seemed like as good an idea as any."

Rodrigo nodded. "Yeah. I can see that."

"And then we just kept going," said Javier. "You know we were neighbors, but I never really knew her. Her parents were super-religious, really strict. But with me lonely and Esther on her own, the girl next door and all, I thought maybe — well. It didn't go that way. She comes from a totally different world. But she was still freaked out and I was worried about her. In the end, though, my car gave up for good, and I think we were about done as traveling partners. She mumbled something about relatives, got on a bus in San Jose, and that was it. So I came home feeling like an idiot and three weeks behind in school. And there's the whole romantic story."

Billy shook his head. "I feel for you, man. You think Esther's OK?"

"Probably," said Javier. "But I don't think she's coming back."

* * *

Mark returned in the early evening, carrying a beat-up old backpack with a dead rabbit hanging off the back. He blinked at Esther when he saw her sewing at the dining room table. As though he'd almost forgotten about her.

Nicola entered just after him. "Mark, why don't you let Esther help you with the food and the cooking."

He grunted and looked at Esther skeptically.

"I'm not a great cook but I'm good at following directions," she said. "And I'm not bothered by meat, or blood or anything. Though I've never done — whatever you need to do with the rabbit."

Mark gave a Nicola a look. The other woman shook her head and went back outside.

It turned out his pack contained a large fish wrapped in paper, a fair supply of greens, and a bag of overripe berries.

"This is really impressive," Esther said as they put away the food. "I don't even know where to start looking for food in the woods."

Mark nodded, as though he expected that. "It's not that hard, once you know where to look," he said.

The freezer was filled with frozen bags of butchered meat, each labeled in Nicola's dense script.

"We'll have the fish for dinner," he said. "Now I'll show you what you do with a rabbit."

Esther watched carefully while Mark cut and skinned the rabbit with a knife, then removed the intestines and butchered it. It was a messy process, but not as unpleasant as she'd expected. Mark was clearly very experienced at it.

When he'd finished, Esther helped him bag the meat, and she put the labels on herself. After they'd washed up, Mark gave her an appraising look.

"You're right," he said. "You weren't too bothered by that. I tried to get Nicola to help when she first arrived, and she refused to ever have anything to do with it again. Not that she seems to mind eating the end product." He laughed derisively.

"How long has she been here, then?" Esther asked.

Mark thought. "About seven years now, I suppose. She was younger than you when she arrived. Seventeen. That means I would have been the same age as you."

"So you've been around longer?" she asked. Mark just grunted.

When they put the meat in the freezer, Esther again noted the neat arrangement and Nicola's writing.

"At least she helps a little. Keeping track of the food."

For a minute Mark looked completely different, as though he were going to explode in rage. But he took a breath and looked away.

"Yeah," he said. "She's good at that kind of thing."

They began to make dinner, Esther following Mark's terse instructions when he gave them. Aside from that one moment of inexplicable temper, she found him unexpectedly easy to be around. Much less unnerving than Nicola. There was a straightforwardness to him that reminded her of Javier. And of course that wasn't the only reminder. Mark was athletic, shorter than Javier but with bigger arms and chest. When he leaned over her, she couldn't avoid noticing. But he seemed unaware of his physicality or how it might be uncomfortable to Esther. Exactly the opposite of Nicola.

When everything was cooking, they sat at the table. Esther picked up her sewing again.

"That's good," he said. "Nicola and I never learned. Of course we can buy new clothes or fabric, but it's better to be self-reliant."

"Does Abuela know how? Could you ask her to teach you?"

Mark looked amused. "Most likely she knows. But I suspect she hasn't done it in a very long time, and it's not the type of thing she teaches."

"I could teach you, then," said Esther. "And perhaps you could teach me about gathering food, or hunting. Though I'm sure I would slow you down tremendously in the woods. I can't even run."

Mark looked at her for a while, in a way that reminded her uncomfortably of Abuela's stare.

"You do appear weak," he said eventually. "I thought perhaps I could help you with some techniques. But I don't understand your body. You are hidden away, somehow. Like Abuela."

Esther stared at him. "What do you mean, understand my body?"

Mark looked uncomfortable. "I apologize. I should have asked your permission. It is such an automatic thing for me, you see. The way an animal or a person moves, the way they sound. Without intending to, we all broadcast minute details of our shape and physiology. It was — distracting for me as I grew up, before Abuela taught me how to channel and control it. But as I said, you somehow hide that from me. It is not intentional?"

"No," she said slowly. "I'm not doing anything like that consciously. But I've always been really shy."

"Perhaps it is an innate ability, then," said Mark. "An impressive one, I think. You should ask Abuela about it."

When they were nearly finished with dinner preparation, Esther turned to face Mark.

"Does Nicola have these abilities you do? Understanding bodies from motion?"

He shook his head. "No. But if she wanted she could probably do something similar with her own talents. Knowing her she has probably delighted in examining strangers when she's out running errands."

And Esther was willing to bet that Nicola had already tried to do the same to her. Which meant either she knew all about Esther's body, or she'd been surprised the way Mark had been. But in either case she hadn't been straightforward the way Mark had.

Nicola joined them a few minutes later. They set four places, and Mark filled a plate for Abuela. He took it out the door with him.

"Abuela rarely eats with us," Nicola explained, starting in on her food. Esther waited a while, but when Mark didn't return she bowed her head and said grace silently.

"Are you religious?" Nicola asked with some bafflement. "Really?"

"Yes," said Esther. Nicola didn't need to know the more complicated answer. And thankfully the other woman simply shook her head and moved on.

Mark returned a few minutes later, and Esther savored the food. It was so much better than anything she'd had since she'd left home. Maybe even better than Mother's cooking.

She felt a double portion of guilt. Everything about this place was more comfortable than the last few weeks with Javier. Everything, except the company. And even there, it wasn't so bad. She didn't exactly like Nicola, but the other woman was tolerable. And Mark might be blunt, but he was decent company, without any of the baggage she'd had with Javier.

Nicola helped with the dish washing. It seemed to Esther that she was casually touching Mark a little more than necessary. Mark didn't show much reaction one way or the other.

When they returned to their cabin, Mark added some wood and adjusted the stove again. Esther watched him carefully and asked some questions about the process. When he was through, the cabin warmed quickly. Without warning, Mark stripped off his shirt and stuffed it in the laundry bag. Then he pulled off his pants and did the same. Esther half expected him to go entirely naked, but he hopped up to his bed and pulled the sheet over himself.

Nicola smirked at Esther, then began to undress herself. Esther looked away and got into bed fully dressed again.

Mark had a powerful body. And his body hair was unusual, becoming lighter-colored closer to his groin. Not so different from Esther, perhaps. Aside from the terrible scar on his head, she hadn't seen anything else unusual about his body, but she'd tried not to look too hard.

He did have a penis, though. That was obvious enough in his briefs, though he wasn't erect. Esther tried not to think about it, or about Javier. It was no use, of course. Javier had nicer legs, and that wonderful butt. Mark's body was definitely attractive, though.

When Nicola turned off the light, Esther slid a hand under her shirt and pressed it gently against her back. This pair might be able to sense even subtle movements from her, but she hoped this was innocuous enough.

About twenty minutes later, there were some soft noises and creaks from the other bunk, and a few nearly inaudible whispers. When the other noises started, she had a sudden shock of understanding.

Nicola had gotten onto the top bunk. And now she and Mark were having sex.

It went on a long time, it seemed. Javier had always had an orgasm before she spent this long stroking and sucking on his penis, but maybe intercourse was different. The wet noises were unmistakable, even if she'd never heard them before.

The fluttering in her stomach sharpened, and she unwillingly imagined what was going on across the room. Clearly both of them had ordinary genitals. The tingling between her legs mocked her with what she'd never have. And she was far too shy to even try to give herself pleasure, no matter how arousing it was to hear them. She thought she might even smell them, a musk in the air that might have been from Mark or Nicola or both of them.

There was some shuffling around and the noises stopped. But then Nicola began to grunt, more and more noisily, until she finally let out a massive sigh and a chuckle. From Javier's description she was pretty sure Nicola had orgasmed. And then the sounds of sex began again, continuing even longer this time.

Mark at least was quiet, only emitting a very slight grunt before the two of them fell still. And then Nicola climbed back down to her bunk. Mark seemed already to be asleep.

Nicola gave one more noisy sigh of satisfaction. Esther was sure it was meant for her, and it made her feel pathetic. Then Nicola's breath slowed, leaving just Esther and her unfulfillable fantasies.

...*** Chapter 15 ***...

The visit Javier had been expecting came just two days after he'd returned to school. When the doorbell rang he was sprawled on the couch, immersed in a novel the rest of his English class had already read.

A very attractive white woman was at the door. In her early thirties, perhaps. He'd already guessed who she was when she smiled brightly.

"Javier Sanchez?" she asked. "My name is Myra Jackson. Do you have a minute to talk? I work for the company that sponsored the mathematics exam that you and Esther took."

"Is this about Esther?" Javier asked. "The scholarship she won?"

Ms. Jackson nodded. "I understand you saw her recently. We were looking for her contact information, so we could help her out in these difficult times. We have heard from some family friends that she may be in some trouble. May I come in?"

Javier nodded reluctantly, trying not to show his discomfort. Better her than Fred Daniels, he supposed. He had to play his role very carefully.

She sat in a chair and Javier dropped back on the couch. Immediately he regretted that, because Jackson was wearing a short skirt, and he could see a lot of stocking-covered leg. And a bit of creamy flesh above the stockings. He swallowed and put on a nervous smile.

"I thought she declined that scholarship," said Javier. "Anyway, I don't know where she went off to."

"The offer was still open," said Ms. Jackson, shifting slightly. Her white blouse showed a lot of cleavage. And the way her boobs moved — Christ. She wasn't wearing a bra.

Javier swallowed. This was intentional, sending her rather than Daniels. They'd heard some version of Javier's story, or believed Mamá's comment about him being girl-crazy. They expected him to be flustered, and he was.

"I don't know how much help I can be," he said. "All she said was something about relatives."

"And then she got on a bus in, where was it?"

"San Jose," said Javier. Of course they'd already gotten the whole tale. "But I don't know where the bus was going. We'd already, uh, gone our own ways by then."

Jackson nodded sympathetically. "But you can guess which relatives she might have visited. You two were quite close, I'm sure, especially after than time on the road."

"Not really," he said. "I mean, she was my neighbor for years, but she was just this mystery girl, honestly. Her parents kept her practically locked up in there. I felt sorry for her, and then when her Dad died —"

She nodded, her expression of sympathy deepening. But something else flickered in her eyes, just for a moment. Some kind of anger, or guilt. Had she not known what Daniels was going to do?

"But she'd been attending school, and in some of your classes," Jackson said. "You must have gotten to know her a little."

Christ. They really had dug into everything. He had to be very careful not to lie about anything they could know.

"Well, yeah," he said. "After I broke up with - my old girlfriend, I was looking for someone to talk to, you know. A sympathetic ear. But she barely talked about herself even when I asked."

"I understand," said Jackson, stretching her legs and flashing some lacy red panties. Javier let himself glance quickly. "Now, there's just one more thing. I don't want to embarrass you, and all of this is in the strictest confidence. It comes only from concern about her health. The folks concerned for her mentioned that she might have a medical condition. Something that might have been a bit private. Did you come to know about anything like that? Something unusual about her physically? Maybe dating to her early life?"

Javier put on an uncomfortable and confused look. "Uh, no. I think you got the wrong idea about what our stupid road trip was like. The thing is, Esther is incredibly private and shy. Very religious. We didn't have the sort of — relationship where she would have told me anything about that. I mean, sometimes she took off on her own for the whole day and didn't even tell me what she'd been doing. She had all this cash with her and didn't say where that came from either. Whatever I might have thought when I left — well, nothing happened."