The Twelve Vitali Ch. 12

"You had an idea though, which is why you asked for a relationship like this," he challenged her.

"I was curious," she admitted. "I didn't like to think that the highs I had with Ned were the only highs I would ever have," she admitted. "Those didn't even touch these," she reassured him, "and I'm totally addicted to you and this now. I want more, even now," she grinned.

"Well, you will have to wait, because we have plans tonight," he grinned. "Besides, I'm only human and need to refuel between escapades with a nymphomaniac sex kitten," he grinned, making her blush beautifully.

*****

Cat took her time luxuriating in the bubble bath Matteo had drawn for her before going to have a shower himself. She smiled as he brought her in a glass of champagne and sat up a little straighter.

"Thank you," she said softly and smiled.

"You're beginning to prune," he noted. "Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes or so," he warned. "It might be time to think about getting out."

"But you just brought me a drink," she said petulantly, turning a small pout on him, making him chuckle.

"And I could take it away again," he threatened. "Five minutes," he said sternly, and smiled as he saw her nod in agreement.

"I'll be out in five minutes," she said softly, and took a sip of her champagne placed on the marble edge of the bath.

The change in her since being in the white room was quite remarkable. She was playful and relaxed, and Matteo found he was enjoying every moment that he spent with her even more than usual. It wasn't that she wasn't relaxed and playful before, but she seemed more so now, happier, even, as if a weight had been lifted from her.

"You're different," he said, sitting on the edge near her glass and looking at her. "Can you tell me what's going on in the complicated mind of yours?" He asked carefully.

"I'm not sure what you mean," Cat frowned and considered him for a moment. "I'm the same as always, aren't I?" she asked uncertainly, concern clouding the happy smile she had only moments before.

"Different in a good way," he hastened to reassure her, seeing the comment cloud her mood. "You seem more relaxed, happier somehow."

"I am," she agreed. "You asked me to relax, remember?" Cat laughed lightly. "Can you hand me a towel, please?"

Matteo picked up a towel and helped her step from the bath, looking at her, curiously wondering how her mood could change so quickly from happy to almost sombre. Rather than handing her the towel, he gently dried her body being careful of her still pink breasts and slightly bruised ass.

"No one has ever made me feel so cared for," she said softly. Taking the towel from his hands and hanging it on a hook, she picked up her champagne and wandered into the bedroom to find the overnight bag he had packed for her.

"Lisa hung your things in your closet," he indicated a walk-through wardrobe behind the bed.

"My closet?" she turned to look at him. "I guess I will need somewhere to put things if you still want me to move in with you," Cat chewed her lip as she turned back around to look at him.

"If?" Matteo questioned. "I've been practically begging you to move in here for over a week. What is going on with you?" He hated that he sounded frustrated with her.

"I know I'm being silly, I'm sorry. I'll be back to normal as soon as I get dressed," Cat promised.

"I don't want you back to anything, I just want you to talk to me," Matteo said, carefully schooling his voice to sound soft and loving.

"I don't know what you want to hear," she argued with him, falling back into defensive mode when she felt cornered.

"Forget it," Matteo said softly, not disguising his disappointment and hating that he had managed to ruin her happy mood. "Dinner should be just about ready. Come out when you're dressed, please."

Cat felt the change in dynamic, and it hit her hard that she had done that. He'd surrendered once again to her rather than force her to talk when she avoided it. That wasn't what she wanted. She wanted the dominant Matteo who had given her such pleasure and made her realise that she could be more than the unlovable and unwanted girl from welfare alley. Even Ned had told her that her only use was a whore, and she had believed that he had loved her in his own way. Why else would he have taken her and her brother in when their mother died?

Yet dominant Matteo looked at her with love in his eyes, even as he caused her the painful pleasure that made her body sing. He had never threatened or belittled her while bringing her to earth-shattering climaxes. She had woken up in his arms feeling only his love and concern for her, and it was like a weight had been lifted from her, and for just a little while she had let herself believe that this could all be real and last a lifetime. For a little while, she bought into the fantasy that she could stop worrying that one day he would wake up and regret their relationship.

She wanted the dominant Matteo who looked at her with love and tenderness, despite knowing all the worst parts of her. She hated that he was so obviously disappointed in her and wished she could make it right again, but she wasn't sure how. This softer Matteo who gave her what she wanted all the time would only dismiss her concerns out of hand rather than take her fear of his family's disapproval seriously.

*****

Matteo wasn't ready to give up on the girl who had laughed and relaxed with him following their time in the white room. He wanted that playful younger seeming Kitten rather than the wary Cat who hissed at him when he pushed her on anything personal. They were going to be married, and it was time she proved that she trusted him completely instead of just paying him lip service. If she had to be made to talk to him, then he could do that. He had planned to leave his dominance in the white room, but if this was what he needed to do to get to the bottom of her moods, then so be it. He retrieved her collar from the white room and put it on her place setting at the table.

He had almost given up waiting for her and gone to find her, thinking she had run away to hide from him again, when she appeared in the dining room. She stood uncertainly and looked at him, and he indicated the chair opposite to where he sat with a wave of his hand.

"Sit," he commanded. He watched as Cat sat and looked at the collar in front of her. "You want that, I know you do," he said stiffly. "Put it on now," he instructed without any of his usual manners. He watched the indecision cross her face briefly before she picked up the collar and fumbling with the clasp placed it around her neck. "Stay!" He commanded once it was in place, and left the table to get the fresh seafood platter that Lisa had prepared for them earlier.

Cats eyes widened and her tummy gurgled as she took in the sumptuous platter. She reached forward to take a small piece of crab that sat on the edge of the dish and paused as Matteo's commanding voice sounded again.

"Do not touch!" he snapped firmly and watched as she pulled back her hand, looking at him questioningly. He slowly filled their glasses with champagne before sitting again and looking at her silently.

"Happy Valentine's Day," he lifted his glass and saluted her. She lifted her glass and did the same. "Thank you," he said, "For one of the most wonderful Valentine's days I have ever experienced. Until this moment, however." he paused and looked at her, narrowing his eyes. "You told me when I gave you that collar that you trusted me completely and would surrender to me in all ways. Was that a lie?" Matteo questioned her, sounding stern.

"No! I wouldn't lie about that!" she touched her hand to the collar around her throat.

"I am finding that hard to believe if you can't tell me what made you first so happy and playful and then what scared you so much you argued with me yet again. If we can't trust each other absolutely then the white room has to be out of bounds," Matteo threatened. "I need to trust you to be truthful and tell me when things are going too far. How can I do that when you can't be truthful with me in all facets of our life together? Begin with what made you so happy and playful, both in the room and when we left it," he commanded. "I loved seeing that uninhibited side of you more than I can express. If you talk you can eat," he compromised.

"I'm not sure I can explain it," she said quietly. "Relief, maybe?" she began finding it easier to deal with the dominant Matteo's demands than the softer caring Matteo who had seemed so disappointed with her and she knew would not push her too hard.

"Explain why you felt relief," he demanded and began serving himself from the platter, placing some of the crab meat she had reached for earlier on the plate in front of her.

"It's hard to explain," she said quietly, popping a small piece of fresh crab into her mouth.

"Try. I'm not going anywhere until I get answers," Matteo continued using the demanding stern tone with her. "And neither are you, even if I have to tie you to the chair!"

"I thought I was broken," she admitted. "I grew up knowing I was unwanted and unloved. Even David was cruel at times, though I know he regrets those times now. I believed that Ned loved me when he took us in and made me his girlfriend. I believe I deserved everything he did and said to me. I believed I was that girl. The skanky low-class mole that ended up either involved with the gangs and petty crime in the area or turning tricks as a whore. Then I met Frankie, and he took David under his wing and helped me believe I could want and have more than the life my mother and neighbours had. Ned kept coming back to claim me, though, and I knew that I would always be that girl. That's how I met your father and Ricco. You know the rest of that story."

"I do," he said slowly. "That doesn't explain the relief and happiness."

"Ricco was sweet and good to me. He gave me a glimpse of a life I had only dreamed of, but in my fantasies I wanted more, craved the violence and pain that went along with the pleasure I derived from the way Ned treated me at first. I could live without it though, because it felt different, good, but different. Then I realised we never went out anywhere public and he hid me and our relationship from the world. All those horrible feelings of being unlovable came back, and I didn't want that, especially with the nice and soft sex which did little for me. I knew then that I was broken, so much so that no one would ever love the real me, and I needed to protect myself from loving them," she paused and sipped her drink.

"Then you met me and told me you were over men and relationships in general," he added to her story, letting her eat. "I can see why the no strings attached contract appealed to you then, but your feelings got in the way and you broke it off to protect yourself," he showed his understanding of the events following her break up from Ricco.

"I couldn't stay in Melbourne with Ricco so close. I kept letting him back into my bed, just like Ned," she sighed. "As I said, I thought I was broken."

"Past tense?" he asked.

"I didn't understand about dominance and submission, or that it didn't have to be an abusive relationship to have that sort of... pain. I didn't understand why the Kept would choose that life. I didn't understand that what I craved was the love I saw in your eyes today as you continually asked how I was feeling and explained what was happening. For the first time I didn't feel broken for craving that sort of pain... and getting off on it."

"You're not broken," Matteo said, stepping out of character and taking her hand. "You are perfect just the way you are, and I love you. Your past doesn't matter to me, only our future together matters now."

"We can't ignore my past, and your family knows all about it, everything, including Ned and my mother," he sighed. "I don't belong in your world. What happens when the press finds out that your wife used to live with a criminal? You know they can twist things," the anxiety came back to her voice. "My past will matter to your family. That's why Ricco kept me hidden, or at least part of the reason."

"I don't think you understand how far our influence extends," Matteo said honestly. "There isn't a media outlet in the country that would risk slandering a Vitali. My family, the ones who know you, think you are a remarkable woman for not being broken by your past. As do I."

"I'm not broken, am I?" she touched the collar, feeling the softness of the leather. "For wanting this?" she whispered.

"No more than I am broken for loving that you want to wear it and be mine," Matteo smiled. "Eat something!" he commanded, returning to his stern tone. He considered her as they ate and continued to discuss her concerns.

Beneath the straight-talking tough girl attitude he had first encountered was a girl who wanted romance and a strong partner who would protect her from the uglier side of life and the past she was desperately trying to escape. He realised she not only wanted the feeling of that collar around her neck in the white room, or when they were intimate, but she needed that sense of control in her life every day. She needed the security of knowing she was loved and protected after having no one to rely on but herself for so long.

He, too, had discovered a different side to himself. Where he had believed he needed the challenge of a strong woman and the thrill of subduing her, he found Cat's need to submit to him captivating on so many levels. The power and control she offered him today, once he had said those three little words, was mind-boggling, not to mention surprising. He had never felt the way he felt about Cat before, and it made the years of heartache he had suffered after Nik's betrayal seem like such a waste of time.

"I love you," he said during a lull in the conversation. "I love everything about you, where you came from, your exes, your talent and your need for my dominance. There is nothing my fathers could say that would make me change my mind about marrying you."

"Would you be happy if they made you chair?" she asked, admitting another of her concerns.

"Fine," he groaned. "There is a chance, a slim one, but a chance that could happen. We have a solid trusting and loving relationship that could survive the changes we would have to make to accommodate that. Not all leaders live the way the Donatis' do. We would have options if that ever happened."

"You make me believe that it could all work out in the end," she said softly. "I would still like to talk to Roberto before you tell anyone, please? You should probably talk to Ricco before the others as well," she suggested.

"Believe it, Kitten, because it's going to happen," he said with certainty. "The sooner, the better, as far as I am concerned."

*****