All Comments on 'The Twins Ch. 05'

Ok now we're talking real story with real problems and real progress. Best thing is you smartly got rid of David in short order and hopefully we won't see him ever. Not so great is the fact that "dad" is back and there is less time & place for sexy things. The (possibly) worst thing is that Jack didn't make the grades but I already see a plan forming in Rachel's mind where they attend different schools but close to sneak away and have some fun while the folks at home think all they do is study. Not everything is rosy with those two but this is exactly what a real writer does to his stories & characters and you had the guts to go through with your idea here and for that I applaud you. Having characters that adapt at moments notice is something we encounter everyday in real life so why not in an erotic story.

While it's not the best on LE it's got potential and you vastly improved from the previous chapters especially when it comes to story building and character development. Gave it a 4* this time so keep up the good work and surprise us some more in the future.

though past chapters are good enough for me...heh...I just love the tender and sweet romance...between our young lover siblings but it's great that you've got some challenges for them so long it would make them fight harder to stay together... sticking with the twins till the ending... Thanks a ton

sooo...I was planing on leaving it here, BUT, I had a change of heart and wanted to go a bit further, so if you want to read more about the Twins, watch out for one last chapter.

Thanks for all the helpful comments over this series, all of them were much appreciated.

Fliccy.

Think your last chapter wisely since it'll impact the score and performance of the whole story and you future here on LE. As things sand now your story is missing the real punch and the obligatory ups and downs that would really demand serious thinking (the end of school with less than expected grades is nice but it's not enough), characters come and go without leaving much impression (unless hate is what you're after), and leaving the series in style of "And they rode into the sunset with a plan in her head" isn't an ending that would exactly please the crowd unless you have a follow-up series/story prepared.