This Ain't Lolita

"Thank you," I whispered in his ear before kissing him quickly on the cheek.

He was almost tripping when he got back to the game and his shot was so far off it was laughable. Dad looked over at me a few times with a look I couldn't understand, and when it was his turn Mike leaned in and whispered something to Paul that I couldn't hear. He looked over at me after he said it, and I was almost positive someone was blushing.

I lost them to the game for a while and decided they needed to know what they were missing.

"I'm going to go take a shower. You kids are boring and it's so f'n hot out here I can't stand it."

"Don't drink any more of my beer Babygirl. That stuff is ten percent and I don't want to have to carry you to bed later."

I just nodded as I walked into the house and up to the bathroom. I could see them playing out the window and, of course, it was Mike who first looked up. I looked down at something on the floor as I undid my dress, and I let it fall off me without paying too much attention. I turned to pick it up, and when I looked back out, I saw Paul steal a glance as well. The only fucking person who wasn't turning to look up at my perfect little tits was my dad. I climbed into the shower with a sigh.

I raped the shit out of the showerhead. There's no other way to describe it. I turned it on the strongest jet setting, held it between my legs, and for the first time I thought about him fucking me. It wasn't gentle or sweet, and I didn't care. I stopped caring about anything at all, and I pretended he was there in the shower with me. I imagined my hand around his hard cock guiding him into me, and I leaned against the wall as I thought about him fucking me from behind. The water had me coming in seconds and I didn't even bother to keep quiet. They were all outside and so what if I came in the shower. I was a big girl now, wasn't I?

When I finally calmed down I got out and dried myself off in front of the window again. It wasn't until I dropped the towel and looked out that I realized they were gone. The backyard was empty and without the sound of the shower I could hear voices down in the kitchen. Well, so much for them not hearing me, I thought.

Fuck.

Part Seven

"What the hell was that?"

"What?"

I thought about playing cute for a minute but realized it wouldn't work. He was actually angry with me, and I knew better.

"First you sit out there watching us, which was fine, but then suddenly you have Paul in your lap and you're whispering in his ear. The next thing I know you tell us you're going to take a shower and both my friends can't keep their eyes off the fucking window. Are you trying to make me look like an idiot for trying to be a good father? I let you have a beer and then you act like that?"

"I wasn't trying to do anything!" I was defensive now, because he wasn't doing what he was supposed to. He didn't raise his voice, but he didn't have to. He knew just what I was doing, but did he know why? I was pretty certain I was heading for the grounded for life path faster than the fucked over the counter path.

"I don't know," I said, trying to calm my voice. "I guess I was just teasing. Aren't I supposed to be pushing boundaries? I'm a teenager, it's like developmentally appropriate or something. Besides, would you rather I did go to that frat party and end up drunk with some asshole from community college? I just wanted to flirt."

He sat down on the couch, and I wasn't sure what he was thinking. I sat down next to him and I wondered if I should keep talking. There had to be some way to push this in a better direction. I thought watching his friends get all stupid around me might open his eyes a bit and maybe he'd get it.

"We heard you in the shower."

"Yeah, but you can hear the water from..." I stopped mid sentence when I realized what he was saying. They heard ME in the shower. They didn't hear the water, or the toilet flush. They heard me coming my brains out at the top of my lungs.

"Oh," I said. That was a shit answer, but I was actually embarrassed. I wanted to get some attention, but that orgasm was something else. That wasn't for them at all. That belonged to me.

"My friends seemed..."

"Upset?" I interrupted.

"That's not the word I would use. Maybe interested? Focused? Distracted? Jessica they were enjoying it, and it was totally inappropriate. For you and them. They're good guys, but after watching you lying around in your little sun dress and then changing in front of the window I think even the pope might have had trouble ignoring you."

"You saw me in the window too? I didn't think you noticed."

He shook his head for a while and I moved closer to him on the couch. Maybe crying would work now? Maybe I could just lay my head on his lap and he'd get hard and tell me he's wanted me all along.

Or maybe I'd get sent to my room, which is exactly what happened. I was fucking eighteen years old getting sent to my room on a Saturday night. This was totally not how it was supposed to work.

Part Eight

Sunday afternoon I fucked Chad.

There's no easy way to sugar coat that so I'm just going to put it out there. I drove to his house, we went up to his room and before he knew what was happening I was on my knees with his cock getting hard in my mouth.

It took him about thirty seconds to be hard as a rock, and I closed my eyes when I kissed him. I didn't even mind looking at him, and I certainly wasn't thinking about my dad, but not all of me was there. He undressed me more gently than I thought he was capable, and when he took my nipple in his teeth I actually moaned in spite of myself.

He slid his hand into my panties as we fell down onto his bed and I was embarrassingly wet. Thankfully he didn't say a word as I kissed him and let him try to figure out where he was supposed to touch me. When he slid two fingers inside me, it didn't matter anymore, and suddenly it was me pulling off my undies and rubbing his cock against my pussy.

"I want you to fuck me," I whispered. He grabbed my ass and was about to try and thrust up into me when I put a hand on his chest and told him to a wait a second. I grabbed my bag off the floor, pulled out a condom and rolled it down over his hard cock. I wanted to get fucked, but I sure as hell didn't want to catch something from Chad fucking Michaels. That was not a story I would live with.

As soon as the condom was on I was around him and his eyes opened wide. I pushed my hips down and told him to fuck me harder. He grabbed onto me and thrust up as he bit his lip and closed his eyes. It felt good, but it wasn't enough.

Before he could say a word I was on my knees at the foot of the bed with my ass in his face.

"Fuck me from behind. Treat me like a little whore, I know you want to."

He didn't waste any time as he crawled behind me and pushed right back into me. He felt so deep inside me from that angle that I screamed for a second time, and I thought he might stop. He was either too dumb or too excited to stop though, and he began slamming into me over and over again as I gripped the railing of his bed.

I looked down and I noticed he still had race cars on his sheets. I tried not to laugh as he continued fucking me, but it was almost too much. Once again I needed something else. I told him to stop and then I lay down on my back looking up at the ceiling. He looked confused for a moment, and then completely out of the blue he did something unexpected.

Rather than just fuck me again, he buried his mouth between my legs and stuck his tongue so far inside me I almost kicked him. He licked me and sucked me like he was starving, and despite his lack of experience he made up for it with enthusiasm. I was two seconds away from coming when suddenly he was kissing my mouth and his cock slammed back inside of me.

I reached a hand down between my legs and pressed two fingers against my clit as he started to jackhammer me. He held himself up on his arms, and I stared as the muscles on his chest as he pumped his hips. I could tell he was getting close by the noises he was making and I encouraged him with my own moans and kisses. I rubbed my clit faster and just as he started screaming "oh fuck" over and over again I was coming around his cock.

I could feel him spurting into the condom and it felt like a vein was going to pop out of his cock. He didn't stop, even as he came, and I shook and trembled on the bed as I clenched my muscles around him.

When he finally did stopped, he collapsed on top of me until I couldn't breath.

"Move, you idiot," I said and he rolled off me without a word.

I looked up at his ceiling and saw he had glow in the dark stars that probably didn't even light up anymore. What the fuck was I doing? I looked over at him and he had a dumb grin on his face and his eyes were closed. I slowly got up and started to get dressed before he said anything.

"So, like, does this mean we're going out now?" He said rolling over on the bed.

"What the fuck do you think?" I asked as I pulled up my jeans and threw on my tank top.

"Well, yeah, I mean we just did it, right? So, like now we should be dating. I can take you to movies and we can make out at parties and then we can fuck when my parents aren't around."

"How about instead of all that, we just pretend this didn't happen and I go home now? M'kay?"

"Um, I guess we could do that, but..."

I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead. He was still naked and hadn't even bothered to pull up the sheets.

"You're nice, but I'm not looking for nice right now. Besides, I'm going to college and you're going to college, so let's just call it a fun afternoon and leave it at that, okay?"

For a minute I thought he might cry, but then he was nodding and acting as cool as could be.

"Yeah, Jess. That's fine. Whatever you want."

I closed the door behind me and let myself out. I drove around the neighborhood for almost an hour before finally pulling back into my driveway. I locked the car, went up to my room, lay down on my bed and before I knew it I was crying like a baby.

Part Nine

I was almost surprised when Daddy came into my room and sat down on the bed. I was still in my jeans and tank top, but I had pulled a light sheet up over me. It made me feel safe, and that was important right then.

"What's wrong, Babygirl?" he asked with sincere concern.

"Don't call me that," I said, as I tried to stop crying.

"Okay. What's going on Jessica? Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, I just want to pout and cry and be a big fucking baby."

"Was I a big baby the other day when you took care of me?"

"That was different. You're a grown man and you have real reasons to cry. I'm just a stupid kid and I'm crazy and doing dumb shit. I feel like an idiot, and I don't even know why. I'm sorry, Daddy."

He lay down next to me on the bed and for a moment I thought he might hug me. Instead he took my hand and held it against his chest. I could feel his heartbeat for a while before either one of us said anything.

"I feel pretty dumb when I'm crying too. It doesn't go away just because we get older. I thought it might, but then poof. I feel like a fucking moron still, but sometimes I just need to cry. It's like I can let out things that way that I can't otherwise express. Does that make sense?"

"Too much sense. It's like my body is telling me something my mind can't understand."

"How do you feel about red wine?"

"Excuse me?"

"How do you feel about red wine? I have two bottles of amazingly good red wine, and I think it would be a shame to send you off to college without getting a thorough understanding of how wine affects you. I mean, it just wouldn't be safe, right?"

He was using his mischievous voice that used to embarrass me as a kid and now made my legs tingle. Okay, it made other parts tingle as well, but I was still crying and trying to ignore any tingling at all.

"So, I can drink wine with you?"

"I think it sounds like a solid plan, don't you? We've both had a hard week, and I made some steaks that need eating."

"You grilled a steak?" I asked with surprise. Grilling was too normal for dad.

"Well, I marinated them in beer and sea salt for three hours, covered them in mango salsa and grilled them on boards until they were exactly medium rare. I wasn't sure when you were coming home, but they should still be warm. Perfect for a night like this actually."

Without thinking I wrapped my arms around him and kissed his cheek. He held me too and for what felt like hours we just lay there on my bed. He smelled like the grill and summer air, and his face was scratchy against mine. He felt strong and comforting next to me, and I carelessly threw my knee over his legs and held him tighter. He kissed me again, but with one hand he slowly pushed my knee down so it was over his thigh rather than waist.

"Let's go open some wine," he whispered, but just before we got up I slid my knee up one more time. He pushed me off him and laughed, but for just a second I was sure I had felt something hard.

Part Ten

It took us exactly an hour and a half to see how I responded to a full bottle of red wine. He had opened the second bottle after we finished our steaks, but neither one of us gave it a thought. We were sitting outside on the patio and we just talked and talked as he kept my glass full. In fact, it wasn't until we stood up that we realized how much we had drunk.

"I think you might be a little tipsy," he said as he grabbed my arm and steered me into the house.

"I'm tipsy, but I'm not drunk. I'd need at least another bottle of the good stuff to be drunk."

I sat down on the couch in a somewhat graceful manner and he paused for a minute looking down at me. I had no clue what he was thinking, but before I knew it he disappeared into the basement and returned shortly with another bottle of wine.

"Well, this is the good stuff. Let's see how we do."

We drank the third bottle on the couch and half way through it there was no doubt about either of our sobriety. He was slurring his words and talking about when he was in college, and I was leaning against him and touching his arm every time he made me laugh.

"Who was the hottest girl you ever got?" I asked suddenly.

"Mariko," he said without a pause. Suddenly he looked over at me and grinned. "That was sneaky, Babygirl. I shouldn't answer questions like that."

"You love answering my questions Daddy. It makes you feel like an adult talking to another adult, isn't that right? I'm just like one of your buddies. You can tell me about that hot piece of Japanese ass. It's okay," I cooed.

He leaned back and brushed my hair away from my face. He left his hand there, gently touching my cheek and I could feel my heart rate skyrocket.

"You are much prettier than my buddies."

He was quiet for a while and we stared at each other.

"You're also prettier than Mariko," he finally said.

I leaned in and poked him in the ribs, but he was being serious for a change. I kissed him on the forehead and put my legs over his lap as I grabbed his hand.

"Are you telling me that I'm prettier than the hottest girl you've ever fucked? That's kinda sad dad, because I'm not that pretty you know."

"You're the prettiest girl in the whole wide world and don't you forget it. I mean, she was hot, but you're..."

I wish I could tell you that this was my master plan. That I was thinking about what I could do next to get him into my bed, but the truth is I was drunk and happy, and I was so focused on the moment that I didn't have anything left for scheming at all. He was looking at me with an expression I had never seen before, and I didn't know what to say.

"Why were you crying this afternoon?" he finally asked. I still had my legs over his lap and his arm was around me.

"Cause I slept with a boy I don't really like all that much." I don't know why I went with the truth, but so it goes. I blame the wine.

"Oh," was all he said.

"You probably think I'm a slut," I told him, as I rested my head against his shoulder. "A gross slut."

"Was it terrible?"

"No."

We had a long moment of silence and once again I wasn't sure how much he wanted to know or how much I was willing to tell him. He brushed my hair with his fingers absentmindedly, and we both reached down and had another sip of our wine. Just what we fucking needed.

"How come you slept with him if you don't really like him?"

That was the first question he asked that I really didn't want to answer, but somehow it slipped out. Just like that I said the words I could never take back and everything changed.

"Because he called me Babygirl."

I thought he was going to push me off his lap or stand up and storm out. I thought he might move or try to say something funny so he could pretend he didn't hear me, but instead he was silent. He didn't move his arm and I didn't move a muscle. I kept my head on his shoulder and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Babygirl," he whispered quietly.

"Yes Daddy?" I asked looking up at him.

"I've always called you that. It's not just a name. It's who you are to me."

I kissed him on the cheek and his body tightened. When I put my hand on his face he froze in place, and I wanted to kiss him more than anything else in the whole world.

"I'll always be your Babygirl," I whispered and for the first time he moved. He pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head as his fingers ran down the length of my arm. I could feel the hairs on my body jump up and his touch sent shivers down my spine. I moved my arm gently beneath his fingers and he didn't stop.

My nipples were hard beneath my shirt and when I looked down they almost looked obscene. My whole body was about to explode, and yet I couldn't make myself move. His fingers moved up to my neck and brushed my cheek and still I couldn't do a thing. I leaned my head back onto the couch and watched his gaze fall on my neck. When he touched my chin I almost lost all control, and when his finger brushed against my lips I let out a moan.

He leaned in close to me, and I reached out to touch his shoulder.

"He called you Babygirl," he said. It wasn't a question. I opened my eyes and looked right at him. He needed me to say it, because he couldn't.

"Yes Daddy. He called me Babygirl, and I fucked him."

His lips were strong and sweet, and they crushed into me before I knew what was happening. His arm was around me pulling me tighter, and I opened my mouth without thinking as he kissed me. I pulled his cheek to me and held him as I kissed him back; when his tongue traced the bottom of my lips I moaned again with unmistakable need.

He moved down to my neck and chin, pulling me up onto his lap so I was facing him. He kissed me on one side and then the other and I could feel him beneath me. He was hard and strong, and even through the denim of my jeans I could feel him. He kissed down my neck and towards the vee of my shirt and I threw my head back. He kissed the soft space between my breasts as I let the straps fall off my shoulders exposing what passed for cleavage.

He kissed each breast as I pulled the straps down further, but suddenly he stopped. His hands were on my waist and my tank top was useless around my belly. My chest was rising and falling with the quickness of my breath, and he stared at me for what felt like hours.

"What the fuck are we doing?" he finally asked.

"I'm pretty sure you've done this before," I said before leaning in and kissing him again. He didn't resist, and one hand moved up to cup my breast in his huge palm. He kissed me again and held my flesh beneath his hand as soft moans escaped from his lips.

"This is a really bad idea, Jessica."

"Don't call me that," I whispered before twisting my hips over his hard cock until he almost lifted me off him.