All Comments on 'To Be Transformed..or Not? Ch. 03'

The author paints an imaginative narrative, but her work awaits a maturing understanding of the language and more aggressive proof-reading. Sentence fragments, dangling participles, misspellings, misused words and punctuation errors proliferate, not just due to conversational style but in errors more basic. Akima could learn much from the free included grammar checkers in M$ Word or Corel’s Word Perfect (my old favorite), if available. She has not read enough English to become at home in the language and write better than an American or English good high school in the upper 40% of the class. I’d counsel intense reading, learn from grammar checker, and engage an editor or mentor. Good luck!

It's a good story but this chapter and the ones before it need to be edited very badly.