by Vitavie
If this her twelfth language then there must eleven others spoken very well. The problem you and I have is that in a story like this, this not the way we speak. I don't have a problem with that any more than I do talking to someone who talks like this because that is how they have learned to speak English. Perhaps to a native English speaker it sounds a little stilted and not so erotic. I'll just pretend that I'm talking to a sexy French girl whom I've never met, yet!
...to some of the worst dialogue of all time:-
"Hi, lovely Paul!
"We are joined now, by the most intense experience people can have. Only right too! I am so glad. Hope you are too!"
"Eve, words fail me. How can this be wrong? I am glad with you."
"The morning is bright! Let's wash and start the day. Come with me!"
This SUCKS - bigtime!
Reading a Shakespear play or several books of the KJV in a row can set you up to make people wonder if you just stepped out of your Tardis. Emotion can can also get a hold of you and you may surprise yourself. Especially if you love poetry. People are weirder than you may think.
how old are you.. 10!!! .. poor wording, put together badly.. and no thought put into it... what a waste of time reading it.. glad I skipped to end to write a comment... give it up or read some of the good stuff on here to help you do an erotic story and not this dribble..
This series of two is my most read but amongst my lowest rated. May I conclude that ‘incest’ is interesting, but I am not satisfying the general taste? Or is the menstruation killing people’s appetite? Or is it simply the style of my dialogue, as some of the below suggests?