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All Comments on 'Two Girl's Golden Lust'

by KindEyes

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AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Below average

Your writing skills could use some polishing. You have your characters address each other by name numerous times in dialogue, but no one actually speaks like that. Read your dialogue aloud next time to get a feel for it and see if it sounds natural!

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userKindEyes@KindEyes
7 Stories
50 Followers
"The Bonding" is the one story I've written that I'm happy with. It came to me and made it to paper effortlessly. I'm love the warmth and tenderness in it. All of my other works were hard to write and (I think) it shows. I'm not a author at all. I found out how hard it c...