All Comments on 'Visiting Gotham Ch. 03'

Looking for another chapter.

Enjoyed the story and the intense sex. The sex scenes are fun and you do well illustrating Emily's carnal nature. Also your writing is getting better with each chapter which is wonderful!

A few thoughts for constructive criticism: Assuming you want the characters to come across as adults I think there needs to be more background telling to make the characters easier to relate with. For instance if Ben is supposed to be an adult, having some background about how he makes money, his work, and his past relationships may help his character pass. By the same token, when writing interactions between Emily and Ben I'd build the rising action a bit more by having more dialogue before the "!" points start coming up. In Emily's case, those "!" points sabotage your attempt to make her seem like a revitalized 140+ year old, but instead as a teenager who has lived little life and thus responds to situations in fits of histrionics.

Overall keep up the good work; and I look forward to what you make next!

Please!!!!! I'm really enjoying this story!!!!!

It's been awhile since chapter 3, you can experiment with the aphrodisiac still having an affect on more heroines, or throw in a new villain. I love the original concept of Harley Quinn dominating some random guy, so A new chapter would be awesome.

i finished this chapter awhile ago, when might we get the next? And will that be the finale