All Comments on 'Wedding in Bermuda'

why the fuck write only half a story

I wish that these half stories could be pulled and the writers banded from posting

time to divorce the cheating bitch

or did some guy kick you in the nuts to make you quit writing?

Hateful, unsympathetic characters and a general inability to write a conclusion or anything which would lend value to a story.

This was not a story. This was barely one scene with a little background.

Worthless Crap

1*

Was Steve fucking his wife? Did the wife realize it was Steve? Why was he just laying there watching Steve fuck his wife? Was he fucking Steve's wife? Is his wife OK with him fucking Steve's wife?

Just needed a little more explanation so I could understand what this is all about. Thanks.

I get it Steve was actually fucking his wife and his sister-in-law just gave him a blow job. He lost all around. I would have made her pack the minute the three of them walked out of the bathroom together. Hell give them the kids too and go out and find someone just for your self,

Just read both of your stories; not awful, but not real good either. I think a lot of the comments on both gave you very good advice even if the commenters intended to insult you. Very short stories are hard to write; they should only be attempted by the experienced. There used to be a guy here called 'finishthedamnstory.' He's have a ball with this one.

There are books available on writing at the high school level. I know mine helped me and I think one would help you; for sure you'd never mix accept and except again.

Another comment mentioned the wife changing way to quickly to be believable. I agree, there must be a reason for such a drastic lifestyle change. You didn't even hint at one.

Several who commented complained about no originality, and this is more a matter of the reader's misunderstanding than yours. A book on creative writing I once read insisted there is no longer an original plot--every basic plot has been used many times. The only thing we can do is add our special twist, and to be truthful, given the thousands of stories posted here on LW and the numerous ones read by most readers, it's very unlikely they will run across a plot they haven't seen before. So my advice is, "Try to make your characters act in a believable way,and take all nonconstructive criticism with a grain of salt."

Good Luck!

Clearly this... like every story here... is completely autobiographical.

another cocksucking WIMP posting DUMB cuck SHIT.

Why did you stop? The interesting part would have been the aftermath, assuming he didn't wimp out. As it was, 2 stars.

Actually, FTDS was TWO people, and one died, that's why there are no more stories.

First his wife went from not wanting to do anything even in the dark under covers to walking around half naked with them to top less on the beach. Ok so all are drunk but his wife undressed with the two of them in the bathroom. This is only on athe 3 day so there is a whole week and they are still together a year later and she is doing all to make up for it. He only got a blow job so far and his wife got pounded by the other giant cock. That how they treat him for being nice and paying for them to go away with them and his wife is a cunt for doing that to him. If he stays with her which he obviously did he will alway have to see the cousins guy who fucked his wife and did things to her that she never let you do until out of pity to stay with her. Hope he at least got up and left the three of them there to think about how they abused him.

The setting was great! The lead into the story, good, but the writer needs an editor and a little more of a story line with at least a finish to this chapter. Like what did the wimp ( obviously you painted him to be one) do after the catch of his wife and why or how did she end up being so loose? Did she tell him what transpired to get this ball rolling? So many questions, so few answers, story incomplete. Please follow up and get help with an editor.

illiterate cuck shit.

Take all criticism with a grain of salt. Yep, you're right, just like we take all your comments with a grain of salt. Need I say more?

WOW!!! Good Story

My wife Debbie and I Loved It.

Looking forward for part 2

Wish it would've been longer but still kept me wet. I always love being the 'accidental' slut

Moral of the story - don’t get so drunk that you don’t know what’s happening and you can’t participate. Hope the rest of the trip got more interesting. Xoxoxoxoxo Annette

Needs to be finished. Anyone who posts a comment under anonymous is a coward.

Anyone who posted a comment praising this story is an idiot.