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From the essay: Works Cited:
Costanzo, Joe. Deseret News Online ed. 13 Jan. 2002.
D'Emilio, John and Estelle B. Freedman.Intimate Matters: A History of Sexuality in America. Harper and Row: New York. 1988.
Glenn, Norval D.Closed Hearts, Closed Minds: The Textbook Story of Marriage. Institute for American Values: NewYork. 1997
Kessler, Julie Ann. The Claremont Instutite Centers. 13 Jan. 2002.
Kilbride, Philip l.Plural Marriage for our Times: A Reinvented Option?. Bergin and Garvey: Connecticut. 1994.
"Loving More Message Board." Online Posting. 03 May 2002. Loving More Magazine,
Melusky, Jon. "Poly Questions." Personal e-mail. May 03, 2002.
Stef. Homepage. 13 Jan. 2002
Wolfson, Hannah. Detroit News Online ed. 13 Jan. 2002.
Do you have something to contribute? Questions? Comments? Other links or suggested reading? Send me feedback via my Author Profile.
- COMMENTS
msboy8about 19 years agoFirst of all, I heartily agree that anonynous comments are bad. I think those people are cowards! I thought that your review was well written. I personally am involved in a sex-less marraige with grown up children.
I am a Christian, so I do not support the Polyamory Lifestyle, but I will not condemm it either. We all have to make our own choices in life, it's called FreeWill. If you have any comments or questions for me, please PM me or email me at msboy8@yahoo.com
darkgoddess2478about 19 years agoAuthorFor all those who have asked questions about this work, I do have a thread devoted to it on the message board. (You can get to it through the Bulletin Board link on the main Lit page.) I will answer all questions as I receive and try to offer some background information. http://www.literotica.com:81/forum/showthread.php?t=314536
Thank you to all who have posted so far. I am glad that this provoked so much discussion! My apologies for the slant that many believe were in this essay... Please feel free to contact me via with anything you might have, leave more public comments on the essay (I love reading them!) or come and discuss it with me on the message board.
Anonymousabout 19 years agoI enjoyed this esssay. There is nothing with polyamory, polygamy, or swinging. Those are all legitimate alternatives to monogamy, which is unnatural. I am a swinger, and I have no problem with this. It works for me.
I don't see what would unfair to either partner about polyamory, as long as it's mutual. That is, no double standard. The male and female are BOTH entitled to other partners. I prefer to have a primary partner, along with occasional partners with whom I use protection. There is nothing irresponsible or less committed about this.
APabout 19 years agoRegarding "anonymous" and "anonymous..."
Why is it that the negative comments always come from "anonymous?" Are you so afraid that you can't even display an online ID - nevermind a real name?
I feel that polygamy in Africa is unfair largely because of a practice called "genital mutilation." That's where, in an attempt to ensure that all children will be genetically descended from the male, the incentive to commit adultery is removed. Said incentive being the clitoris. Don't tell me that the women in Africa are being well treated when their introduction to sex is to have someone cut off their clit with a stone knife when they turn 13.
Regarding the other "anonymous" who said that polyamory won't work in the long run. One: you stated that polyamory is free of responsibility. Not true - you've just described a commune from the 60s. "Free love" is not true love, it is merely swinging. Love is when the happiness and welfare of another is essential to your state of mind; a desire to see that other achieve their maximum potential. Whether it's love of spouse, love of country, love of children, love of an ideal, it is all the same. Love requires the assuming of responsibility.
Second, your insinuation that men do not assume their fair share of household duties is both incorrect and offensive. Patti (the P in AP) does much of the cooking, and the majority of the cleaning (which encompases a great deal, as I am not very tidy). But I'm the one who does carpentry and other repairs around the house. I'm the one who does basic maintenance on the car. I'm the one who went down to the basement with the plumber and helped him use his snake while wading ankle deep in sewage. Patti is the one who does the painting. I'm the one who carries furniture around like they were made of styrofoam so she can do so. I cook specialty foods such as sushi and freshly baked bread for her. In our own ways, we each work just as hard, because we love each other.
Anonymousabout 19 years agoi di enjoy this essay quite a bit, though i felt it seemed to revolve around a male centered relationship. I am in a poly marriage with my primary, my husband, and have a scondary relationship with my lover whom i have been with for three years... my husband has been with his lover for approximately the same time, by coincidence only, i asssure you LOL... i think it would be great if you could write an essay exploring the mutiple facets of polyamory and not just on the traditional sense of polygamy. and interesting reference to cite would be the yanamamo tribe of south america which practices an extreme form of polygamy
