All Comments on 'Wild Night For Innocent Girl'

I wanted to like this story but I couldn’t make it past the first page. The words great and good were overused. Everything that happened to the main character was described as great or good. I wanted to feel what it was like for the main character to be under the influence of ecstasy but I still have no clue other than it was great! You did an OK job establishing the main character’s state of mind and why she was there but the writing was too stilted and the editing was done so poorly that I couldn’t establish a connection with her as the foreplay started. The three men in the story might as well have been human sized dildos. One was smart and one was black other than those two facts they really were just penises with hands and mouths. I know this was primarily meant to be a stroke story and not a lot of detail was meant to go into it but you have to strike a balance between too little and not enough. Find an editor and republish the story. I’m still hopeful to experience ecstasy through someone else. Good luck!

I can't wait for more

For a first story this was very good. The comments given by others should be acted on and will improve your story telling ability. It still takes hard work to get good at something. Hang in there.