A Seething Cauldron

Looking up the passages as she gave them to me took some time, but I was not about to hurry, my mind churning in disbelief at seeing that all they had given to Janet was just as stated.

"This is unbelievable," I said in stunned awe. "I see how they called it the truth of the lies."

"Honey, there's a lot more, including the imminent return of Jesus as he is said to have predicted, and as the apostle Paul expected, but hasn't happened yet. They wonder if Jesus actually spoke those words that he mentioned about five or so times, or if they put them in his mouth for him. Anyway, they list a huge amount of items that are untrue, and give you books, chapters, and verses, but with a little bit of known history and a bit of archeology. I have them for you to look at when you want to," she ended.

I was in a stupor. The things she had brought up were verified by me in the bible itself. It was unbelievable that there could be so much in error in the bible that they told us was the word of god.

As always, Janet waited patiently as I sat there trying to absorb all that I had read and verified. It was mostly there in the bible itself. I looked at her and wondered if my eyes were as dazed as my mind felt.

"I feel stunned," I finally said.

"That's what I thought you'd feel like. I actually wondered if I should have told you about this, but then I thought of how you were thinking, and I knew I had to tell you."

"I'm glad you did. It's going to take some time for all of this to soak in, but I think I'll read it all. How can I not?" I asked not expecting an answer. She had to know that I'd be more than just reading it. It was exploding in my mind.

Exploding was the right word, or nearly so; a myriad of thoughts were roiling in my mind. It was crazy. Were we following something that in essence was a lie? And if so, who perpetrated it and why hadn't we seen it after all these centuries. Before I knew it, time had slipped away and it was near to time to take a shower and prepare to sleep—but how would I be able to sleep when most of the little I had left of my life was suddenly being destroyed?

"Go take a shower, honey, and wash it all out of your mind," Janet said wisely, if not practically. Water couldn't wash away the mess I had in me, nor could soap. Still, I went.

She'd laid out a gown and clean panties. I had to smile at her foresight, her kindness, then took my clothes off and showered.

As before, when I had dried off and donned panties and gown, when I went out, she was already in her gown.

"I hate depriving you of your shower. I wish you'd let me go in the other one and leave yours to you," I tried to complain.

"That's okay; that shower is tricky and it's easier for me to just go ahead and use it as to be trying to get you used to it," she fibbed. I knew she was just being kind to me.

While we were both in bed, she knew I was still very troubled.

"Something just won't let go, huh?" she pushed me.

"Yes. It's troubling me—things I had been brought up to believe, that I never questioned or even thought that I should question, and now I'm finding that just a few verses are changing everything within me. Why didn't anyone ever question any of it?" I groused.

"Maybe that's how they were raised too, to just believe just like their parents, or others in their group. They put their faith in a preacher thinking he knew and understood the scriptures that are hard to read if they try to, and they went with what he said—blindly, maybe, or for some other reason."

"But he was so wrong, it seems. I don't want to believe that he was, that my parents were, but I can't argue with what you had me look at. If they had looked, if someone had shown them what you did so easily, then everything might have been different."

"Not to throw water on what you're saying, but when I look at the bible, well, it just boggles my mind. How can anyone make any sense of the truth of any of it?" she asked.

I thought about it. She was right, mostly. What she'd had me look at was sort of all over the place—or all over the bible, that is.

"But they've had years to question it," I continued to argue with myself.

She laughed lightly. "Yeah, but when someone did question anything, unless they were real lucky, they were burned at the stake, and lucky if it happened after they were dead. I understand that a few were alive when the flames licked at them."

I shuddered. I'd heard that too, and some even preached that it should happen that way again, but it was said of homosexuals; our preacher had mentioned another preacher saying that we should go back to the old ways, the way of god in the Law. Still...

"it still makes me so angry," I said.

"I can imagine it does, but exactly why do you say it?"

"Matthew shouldn't have killed himself, and my sisters shouldn't be as they are now, if Rebecca is still alive, that is. It shouldn't have been that way for any of us including the other kids."

"That's what I thought you meant, and you're right, it shouldn't have happened."

My tears had returned, and Janet sensing it, stretched out her arm in invitation to me. Without a word, I rolled into her comforting arm and that marvelous bosom that I longed for so much. Though I instantly loved being on her, my crying continued.

"It's all a lie, isn't it? It has to be for the bible itself shows that. Is any part of it true? I have to wonder."

"Maybe some of it is, but very little, it seems. That book of Daniel stuff really got to me," she said. "Yeah, I read more of what they sent; it's pretty detailed."

As I kept on crying and soaking her gown and breast, the thoughts kept hounding my mind, troubling my heart. Matthew shouldn't have had what they did to him that made him so ashamed as I thought he must have felt, enough so that he felt he had to kill himself. It wasn't right! And Sarah and Rebecca too. Where was Rebecca? Was she all right, or was she like Matthew? And it was all for a lie. A big lie that they still pushed at us with their noses in the air. Yes, their noses had gone in the air whenever they were near any of us. I despised them for that.

"Hush, honey. Try to sleep,' Janet whispered to me as she pulled me tightly to her.

"They lied," I whispered woefully. "They lied; it's all a lie," I said in my desperation. "Matthew was a sweet brother, and so were my sisters, but their lies destroyed them and my parents let it happen, and all for a lie," I said hoarsely, then again, "a lie."

"Yeah, that's how it seems, huh." Janet whispered back.

As I cried sorrowfully, but quietly, I thought that this was not what I wanted to bring to Janet; I only wanted to love her.

"I'm sorry, Janet. I didn't mean to bring all of this to you," I said quietly.

"No problem, honey; I'm just glad that I'm here to help you if I can."

I was lost in my deep sensing of everything, the depths of my sorrows, as well as the growing depths of what I felt for Janet, and how I appreciated the friendship she brought to me, a friendship so deep that it made me fall in love with her in what seemed to be the blink of an eye. I was sorrowing for not simply loving her as I hoped she wished to love me too.

"I'm glad you're here too, but all I wanted was to love you," I whispered without consciously willing it, but from the depth of my feelings that were demanding to be known.

"What?" she asked softly, as if in disbelief at what she heard.

It was out, but my feelings were so intermixed and wearying that I confessed my love of her again.

"I love you, Janet. You've been so sweet to me, so kind and caring."

I felt her body shift, pulling away from me, but only a little. My instant thought was that I was running her off, and it troubled my already heavy heart.

"Come up here," she said urgently as she tried to raise me up and pull on me at the same time.

Though I was fearful, my heart was full of hope; at least I would know what it was to feel our bodies fully together. My breath caught as I moved atop of her as she seemed to want me to do. Once there, and knowing the unbelievable joy of her whole person meeting my whole person, I felt my breath catching. Then Janet's hands were aside my face and lifting it slightly.

"Did you mean that you love me as being in love with me?" she whispered anxiously.

"Y—yes," I found my voice enough to get that one word out, again feeling a mixture of fear and hope.

"Oh my god," she said, then her lips raised to take mine.

Once more my heart soared, but as never before. Her lips felt so sweet, tasted so wonderfully delicious, that my joy was expressing itself over and over with my many moans of happiness. Her one hand had left my face and had gone about my head as she held me fast to her as our heads moved down to her pillow. The kiss was as if forever, our lips trying to merge, meld into each other, her tongue occasionally licking at my lips, and sometimes meeting mine in our delirious joy. After much time, but not enough to satisfy my desires, she pulled her lips off of mine, but hugged me hard against her neck.

"I thought it would never happen," she said. "God, I think I've loved you almost since I first saw you."

"You did?" I whispered, not believing her words, yet happy to hear them.

"Yes, honey, I did, but I knew right away how you were so troubled, and I didn't dare do or say anything, only to wonder and hope. I couldn't believe it when you said yes to having coffee with me," she said in a soft voice that told me of her wonderment.

"I couldn't believe that I said yes," I responded, "but I was quickly glad that I did. Then you began to open up my heart and mind, and it was as if I was a child who was rapidly growing up, then soon wanting to be with you forever. I loved how you held me, helped me, and were ever so patient with me. After I left you, I cried over wishing I'd stayed with you. You're everything to me, but I'm so sorry that I don't know anything about love, or how to love you, just that I do and desire to be with you so much. I do," I repeated.

She kissed me again, this time so tenderly, as if giving me her heart full of her love of me. My joy was such that I didn't moan, but groaned in disbelief of the wonder of her love, and felt my lips giving into her every touch.

Too soon that kiss was over.

"It's okay, my sweet and beautiful girl, I 'll show you how to love. it will be my great pleasure, I assure you," she said with a lilt in her voice.

"Will you? All I know is this desire that I have to be with you, and I know that there has to be more, but I don't know what. Help me to learn to love you more," I begged, my heart in my words.

"I will, and if you'd like to, I'll start right now."

My heart suddenly lurched. "Yes," I barely got the word out. "Now."

Waiting for what I knew not, then I felt her hands at the hem of my gown and working it up.

"Help me take it off of you," she urged me.

Her hands already on my buttocks sending some wild flashes of the sweetest sensations, I lifted my body slightly as she pulled it up and then over my breasts. I gasped at the sudden exposure of them to her waiting touches. They came quickly, but only for a moment as she kissed my breasts and sucked lightly on each nipple bringing newer sensations surging through me. Then she had my gown off, and was pushing at me to leave her body.

I didn't like that, but soon I knew why she had done that as she rapidly took her gown off and flung it aside of the bed.

I knew we were fully naked. My breathing was troubled, catching, hot in my throat. Though she'd done nothing else as yet, little sounds of anticipation escaped from my mouth, whimpering, wanting sounds, wanting all that awaited my unknowing body and person.

Her hands went to my breasts and caressed them lightly, smoothly, then mildly pinched my nipples. When I felt her lips on me again, I moaned, giving myself over to whatever she would do to me, it already felt so sweet to me, so making my hips rise and squirm for whatever reason.

I reached to touch her breasts, to know the joy of them fully, unclothed and there for not only my cheeks, but my hands and lips, but I barely touched them for she was covering me with her body and kissing my neck, then my face. How I was relishing the wonder of her love, how my face joyed in every place that her lips covered with her soft kisses. She was making my whole body squirm with a wanting of more of her, and everywhere.

One of her hands was following the curves of my body, including my breasts again, but then trailing down over the swell of my hip, then my thigh. She didn't stop there; her hand toyed within my pubic hair. My middle body had a mind of its own, begging for attention by lifting, moving about under her hand, a secret part of me wishing her to find its offering, but what I still had no idea for I truly had no knowledge of sex, save for the present that told me it could be so beautiful.

It was more than beautiful, and her lips continued downward on my neck which like my thighs, loved the attentions of her lips, but so much teasing was driving me mad.

"Please," I begged for whatever unknown and hidden release, my hands frantic on her body that I was loving madly with my meager, furtive touches.

When she was kissing my tummy, I wondered where it would all end, but not soon enough, I found out as she kissed one of my thighs near its underside as that leg was raised of its own accord, her hand lightly caressing my lower cheek making me moan and wiggle about more. It seemed that she wouldn't take whatever I was trying to offer to her.

"Part your hairs," I heard her say, but though I had no idea what hairs she was talking about, my hands and fingers did, and went to separate my pubic hairs.

What secret knowledge did my own body have that I was unaware of, I wondered in anticipation. Though it didn't tell me, I did find that my hair was drenched with a wetness such that I wondered if I had lost my bladder. If I had, Janet didn't mind, and my hips raised up in joy.

Her face was between my vaginal lips and she was licking me there. Merciful heavens, she was making me sound so many noises of pleasure!

"Ohhh," was all I could otherwise utter time and again as she licked deeply, then up, finding a very sensitive spot that tore through my body with pleasures that had me leaving this world riding the sweetest of joys as she kept on licking around it. I knew I was being carried away to a place where I would not want to leave, its beauty was so exhilarating, so complete.

Love could be so marvelous when you are loved in return, I thought, then realized that my hands were caressing Janet's hair and back, and one of the cheeks of her buttocks while she was kissing my face and neck again. Squeezing that cheek lovingly, I wondered when had she moved up?

"You were beautiful to love, and you tasted better than any honey," she whispered adoringly, making my heart jump at her loving words.

"You made me feel beautiful," I said, conscious then that I had had a powerful movement within my body that had made me lose consciousness.

Then I wondered if I had slept, and if so, for how long?

"How long have you been up here again?" I asked foolishly, sounding, I knew, like a dummy.

She laughed lightly into my neck. "A short time; just long enough to let me clean your pussy and freshen my mouth."

Pussy! I'd heard it before, but had always shut those types of words out. I knew what it meant though, and it sounded wicked—wickedly nice and naughty, I rethought. Then she kissed my lips and I tasted her mouthwash. I had indeed slept for a while, short or not.

She moved to her usual sleeping position. "Come here," she invited me softly. "Let me hold you again."

Gladly I moved to cuddle with her, amazed at the sweetness of being at her naked breast; all of her naked body, aware of how sated my vagina felt though it let me know that it would welcome more of Janet's time on and in it. Unabashedly, I kissed her breast that I so loved, and suckled on her nipple for a while as my other hand took liberties with her other breast. It was all more than heavenly. If this was sin, it was no wonder that so many sinned, and so freely. The feelings, the sensations, they were all so satisfying, so demanding and wonderful.

We fell asleep as we were, naked in the joy of our beautiful love.

Chapter 9

Though my eyes were still closed, I was awake, reliving the sensations that had made me so happy. My heart was throbbing madly with the love I felt in it. There were many silly, girlishly frivolous thoughts, but I had the feeling that life could always be this joyous, a beautiful melody of the heaven I had felt still playing in my body.

In such a short time, my sorry, sad and sordid existence had changed so often, whip lashing my life, but everything opening up for me as I had never considered they ever would. Janet had changed everything for me, and in me. I loved her with every fiber of my being, and then suddenly, she loved me too. My, how she had shown me her love. Such splendor, such ecstasy, and so quickly.

Then I felt her kiss, gentle, tender, and oh so sweet as she untangled from me.

"Gotta go, honey; be right back," she said as if making sure I wouldn't leave. Fat chance of that happening.

What did happen was that I opened my sleepy eyes to behold her as I hadn't as yet. I was rewarded as my eyes gazed lovingly at her back parts, surprised as I saw her back as she walked. Her back, legs, and her buttocks mesmerized me, held me and sent a new sensation within me. It was desire with a fire that burned and had my thighs twitching somewhat as they had while she had been loving me. I didn't have the word for that particular form of desire, but I felt it seize me, grip me with a hunger that shocked me, as I watched her walk.

Too soon, she disappeared, but when she came out, I thought I saw something different. I watched her bend as I had before, but this time her breasts were bared, and the fire lit up in me like a freshly stoked furnace. It was when she turned to come back to bed that I saw the difference—she had no pubic hair—and that new fire in me took my breath away! My hunger for her was instant, a rage other than I had previously known taking hold of me—a hungering rage that was devouring my senses.

"Oh-oh, you're hot, aren't you?" she said.

Not paying attention to what she said, only staring at her hairless vaginal lips, I licked my facial ones as the furnace she had started in me began to boil over.

"Go to the bathroom, and we'll see if we can ease that lust I see in your eyes," she whispered huskily. "Hurry, honey, you've got me hot for you again."

Stumbling, I hurried to the bathroom, then quickly washed and rinsed the sleep from my mouth, and rushed back into her arms that took me and kissed me with a fire of her own.

I pushed her away, and stared at her shaved lips, and felt a hungering for them. I was not to be denied as I rushed to be between her legs as she had been between mine, and without any caresses or kisses, I ravaged her. Where and why my wetness had come from before was revealed instantly as I drank her. She was indeed hot for my love, and I was more than hot to have hers.

Licking wildly, taken with the sensations that rushed through me as I sucked her lips into my mouth, I was ravenous for her—I who knew nothing about sex felt as if I was all sex, and Janet was too as I licked up the wellspring of her love. I had no idea that I would love to drink of her passion, but it was magnificent to my senses, my mouth and tongue that sought more and more of her.

"God, honey, you're making me feel so good," she gasped out, her hands on my head, in my hair, her thighs twitching as mine had, then lifting.

Too soon she felt her joy explode in her as I must have the night before. I had found that same spot that she had and laved it with my tongue like a kitten at the last of its mild. Like a wild woman, I couldn't stop wanting her, insanely rubbing against her smooth and sexy, still hot lips that continued throbbing, still moist and giving of her love..