A Seething Cauldron

"Did I do that right?" I was barely able to get out.

"More than right, honey. God, you loved me so good."

"Your lips make me want to be at them again. It's different than mine were, isn't it?"

"Uh-huh! The sensations I get to feel are more potent, hotter than with the hair, and like you, when I make love to you if you're shaved, your pussy will feel that much hotter, sexier to you."

"Make me like you are," I said raspily in a rush. I wanted her again, but I wanted her to have me too.

"Okay, if you want to," she said anxiously.

I felt of her shaved lips with my hand and a rush of sensations tore through my body. The fire was worse in me.

We got me shaved, but how, I have no idea for we were both nervous and wanting.

"Feel it, honey," she told me when we were through.

I did, and I felt another rush of those marvelous sensations, but mostly from anticipation of what was to come.

"Look at how sexy your pussy looks without the hair hiding it," she said.

I stood and looked at my vaginal area, and my eyes quickly closed for I liked it so much that my hand went to it and lovingly felt the sweet smoothness of it, and how it stirred my most basic and primitive desires.

"Everything...everything is so different, so wonderful," I whispered as if to myself.

Janet led me to the bed, and in a rush, we were at each other, and all the joys of the previous night returned, sharp shards of piercing love shot through me again and again, here and there, but both from feeling her loving me, and my joy at loving her. All of the sensations rushed through me, clashed marvelously, and shot through me with arrows as if from cupid's bow, hot, sharp, beautiful.

Then we both exploded in our love.

Our pussies were not satisfied; they seemed insatiable as they pushed us to love again and again. Still we couldn't give each other up, remaining as we were at each other's lips, inhaling the sweet aroma of our sex, occasionally licking up our continuing flows, unintentionally as well as intentionally. When I felt her cheeks as if caressing my lips, I moaned softly and returned her caress similarly. It was a beautiful time for us.

"Honey, we need to feed these bodies so they can have the energy to make us love some more. Come on," she said, reluctant to pull away, I was sure, as I was, and I knew it by the kisses we each gave our still hot and moist lips.

* * * *

In the kitchen, she came up behind me and wrapped one arm about me and took a breast in her hand, her other hand going to my shorn lips that ran with its milk. She sought that little spot that hurriedly sent those lovely, sharp shards of sensations though me and brought on another of those hot, flashing surges that carried me away.

"Geez, I can't keep from touching you," she said, her lips kissing my neck.

"I hope you never stop touching me," I declared.

"I don't think I will, but I guess we better eat before we fall in a faint from hunger for food."

What I wanted was to do to her as she had done to me, it felt so delicious to my body. I knew it would to her body too.

We did eat though, but feed my body as I would, my newly discovered sexual self kept growling with its own peculiar hunger. She saw it.

"You're lusting again," she said with a smile that also showed she felt similarly.

"I can't help it. I keep looking at your gorgeous naked body with those superb breasts that my eyes can't leave, and I feel as if there's a volcano in me that wants to erupt all over the place and burn us all up," I raggedly confessed.

"Can we wait until some of this food goes down before we try to wear each other out again?" she asked with bated breath.

"We should, huh?"

"Yeah, I think we'd better wait a while, but not too long."

After all of my years of deprivation and silence, and suddenly finding my world more than worth living in, as well as finding love such as I had never seen before, I couldn't wait, and fortunately, neither could Janet.

We loved far past any lunch time, feasting and snacking on each other until mid-afternoon.

"This can't go on for all time, can it?" I foolishly asked.

"No, but until it has to temporarily end, we can enjoy it."

That was what I wanted to hear, that is, if I had thought about it.

"Let's get a piece of cheese and some crackers, okay?" she suggested.

The devil got into me. "Darn, if you had suggested that earlier we could have washed it down with our love."

She grinned; she understood for we had drunk all that we gave to each other.

"You're learning, honey," she said. "Just remember it for next time."

* * * *

Sitting across from her again, I gazed at the loveliness of her body, but this time in great appreciation of her beauty—she was beautiful if only to me. Others might consider her very good looking and sexy, but I did that too—very sexy. Yes, my world was rapidly changing and growing.

As I enjoyed her nakedness in this new way, I also thought of my brother and sisters. A picture of Sarah came into my mind. Unbelievably, I was able to look at it though a sadness overcame me.

"Honey, want to talk some?" she gently asked me.

"Yes, I may need to, but can we put on some clothes; you tempt me too much," I said, managing a small smile.

"Sure, honey, let's both do that."

She was right, we both needed to put on clothes to keep from distracting not only me, but her as well.

Janet had me a new pair of shorts and a top, as well as new panties. It touched me tremendously and I kissed her cheek. "Thank you," I said, a tear stealing down my face, which she wiped away.

"You're welcome, honey. Now what were you thinking about?" she got right to it.

"Maybe I'm so happy now, something I had never looked forward to being, but, well, here I am with you and loving being here. That brought up a picture of Sarah, the one that bothered me so much that I hid in silence, and I guess I was saddened because I pretty much know that she's not happy at all.

"Do you think that you're ready to look at what happened; really look?" she asked.

"Maybe. I'm not sure, but this is the first time I've been able to see it and not run, mentally that is."

"Want to try, then? Maybe you can open up more. Think that might help?" she asked in her gentle manner.

"Possibly. You've opened me up so much that maybe I can, at least I think that I can try."

"Okay, but if it gets to be too much, we can stop; we have lots of time, if not today, then later."

"Thank you. You've truly been a life saver."

I talked more about my feelings, things I'd already said, but she encouraged me to keep talking, to get it out and maybe have new insights. There was nothing new, but my understanding deepened, my acceptance of it, though I didn't relish it, was still something that seemed to free my mind even more.

"And you've never spoken about this to anyone?" she asked again.

"They tried to get me to talk, but I worried and was mistrustful, so I didn't say much. Somehow I had the feeling that they didn't really care. That feeling has never left me."

"They put you through the ringer, honey. No wonder you were so uncommunicative at work; I think I'd of been a lot worse that you if it had been me."

"Maybe I would have if they had raped me like they did Sarah and Rebecca. What gets me is how our parents never even suspected that anything was wrong, and just as bad, that the church had these people working for them that were pedophiles. I've never been able to understand that, and I never knew if anything was done about them."

"Wow! I guess you felt helpless even after you came back; I know I feel the helplessness too," she said in a near whisper. "That belief stuff, like that, is unbelievable."

She was shaking her head. Me? I was amazed that I had gotten it out, spoken about it.

"Honey, if you ever feel like you need to talk more about it, then do it. You know that I'll listen. It does seem to do you good to open up about it."

"You're right, I feel good that I've said what little I have to you, but I hate that feeling of utter sadness that comes to me now and then. I know that when those thoughts tried to come to me, and I shut them out, that the sadness seeped into me anyway. Nights were always terrible for me for I had nothing to do but to try to sleep, and it would all try to come to me, to haunt me, though I had no earthly idea what had happened, just that look on Sarah's face, and the silence."

She let out a long breath as if she had been holding it in. I understood her feelings, how it was listening to my story, the story of all of us.

"You know what, I think that you getting that information about the bible helped me, though it made me so angry. From those few verses, I just know it's all a lie, but I want to learn more about it. Maybe that'll help me too."

"We can make time for you to read it all. At least we know we have our libidos under control—at least I think we do," she amended wryly, and looking at me for confirmation.

"I'm not sure, and maybe if it is, it's just temporary," I said, smiling sheepishly.

"Oh yeah, it's temporary all right. Maybe we better take advantage of the lull and let you do your reading. Look, I don't know if you noticed, but I have a computer with the Internet on it. I take it that you're familiar with the Internet?" she asked.

"Yes, I am, and thanks."

"You're welcome, but let me turn it on for you; that way you can just look up whatever you may need."

She turned it on for me, and I was instantly excited. It may well help from the little I knew about the list they'd sent to her.

"In the meantime, I can go stock up on some groceries so we don't starve. That would be a shame now that we've just found how we love to love each other," she grinned.

"That's very true, and maybe very wise. You won't be long, will you?"

"Not real long, but maybe I oughta pick us up a pizza. Do you like pizza?"

"When I've had it, I loved it, but I've not had it much in a while."

She took down what toppings I favored, or that I might favor; fortunately she liked what I did, or so she said.

Chapter 10

With some trepidation, Janet's bible by my side, I began to go through the list of those verses that I hadn't covered as yet. There were so many, the list of errors so long, that I wondered if they weren't wrong themselves. Surely there couldn't be so many errors in the bible. To my continuing shock, not a single one of those on the list could be found to be wrong—the bible did have errors galore.

Once more my head wanted to start to spin, it was all so unbelievable. How could those in the churches not know how wrong the bible was? More, how could our church send people out under these false pretenses. Our parents, and the other parents too, were not on the mission just to work, but to preach, but they were no better than the early Catholic priests that enslaved natives in their so-called efforts to save their souls. They were outright lying whether they realized it or not.

The one thing I did wonder about was why the Exodus wasn't on the list of "lynch pins" of whoever made up the list—how could the Exodus not be considered a lynch pin of both Judaism and Christianity? I thought about it, then thought I saw the logic of it all. Abraham began Jewry, and Daniel was the source of the hoped for returning of Jesus in power and glory, or so it was preached and spoken of by Jesus. Several of the gospels did have Jesus saying that he would return in their generation. It was all about the resurrection that was supposed to come. it was indeed wrong, and Jesus did quote Daniel, but as he often stated his coming back to be in the generation he was in being wrong, it made me wonder at the truth of it.

Caught up in it, I tried to check out the book of Daniel not being historically correct. Sure enough, the book of Daniel quoted Darius as being the one who conquered Babylon, but other places said that it was Cyrus the Great. Turning to the Internet, I found the chronology of the Babylonian kings from Nebuchadnezzar on. There were some huge discrepancies in that chronology and what the book of Daniel said.

First of all, the book of Daniel said that Belshazzar—he of the writing on the wall—was called the son of Nebuchadnezzar. Then it said that Belshazzar was the king of Babylon when the Persians defeated them—the reason for the writing on the wall. The problem with all of that was that Belshazzar was not a king, but the son of the king, Nabonidus, and Nabonidus fought the Persians, or so several sites said.

More, the real son of Nebuchadnezzar along with other kings of Babylon, were omitted.

The Internet also, in various sites, said that Cyrus the Great was the Persian king that took Babylon.

As far as the resurrection, the kings of Judah were promised to sleep with their fathers, and no resurrection was mentioned.

Still, those findings were enough to discredit the book of Daniel as any real prophet, and put into question Jesus' use of Daniel to give credence to his coming back. How could the son of god use a false prophet's words to verify him to be as what it was said that he was, and Daniel, the book aside, had to be an untrue book, and not from any god. Dazed, I went on.

Perhaps the most shocking thing I found was how god was said to send a prophet to king Jeroboam in the Northern Kingdom, but instructed that prophet to return immediately afterward. I couldn't believe it! God had set a trap for him as if he was a mafia boss making sure his underling was trustworthy in some insignificant way, and deceived him. As his punishment for falling into god's own trap, god had the man killed by a lion.

That couldn't have been any loving father as Jesus seemed to proclaim, but a petty tyrant who had no regard for anyone. It was what we called entrapment. That made me think of the verses where a man was allowed to sell his daughters. The god of the bible was truly unbelievable, and couldn't have been any real god. I was stunned to think how that had to be the case. We'd all been told over and over how god wanted us to be saved, that he cared for us all just as he did each sparrow, or the lilies of the field.

There were other items that also pointed to the lack of validity of the bible, and they were many, and easily disproved by the bible itself. I had to conclude that the bible had been written not by god, but by man, and probably many men and maybe at different times. The Philistines being in Genesis attested to that.

And no, it didn't actually say that he cared for the fallen sparrow, or the lilies of the field, but there was something there that indicated a loving and caring father that loved us all though that father was the one who killed so many innocent children as I read that they did in the Old Testament.

As my head spun, my anger started to come in me again. How could they all lie, and more, get away with it for so many centuries—for almost two thousand years! It was incredible. Worse, they were trying to make us all believe it, and to live by what they considered god's laws. I knew that many women like Janet, and now myself, were being judged by these false laws. And for this they caused my brother to kill himself, and my sisters to be as they were, if Rebecca was still alive, that is. My tears came again, and that's how Janet found me when she returned.

"Geez, honey, has it been that bad?"

I grabbed her and held her tightly to me.

"It is a lie, Janet. It's really all just a bunch of lies, and they have to know it. They're not all fools, but they keep on saying it's true when it's not. It's just a bunch of wild stories from whatever places, or from whatever times, that are patched up together and sold to us as the truth, but it's not. It's not, damn them!" I cursed for the first time in my life.

"That bad, huh?" she queried in wonder.

"Worse. Much worse, and I'm not done. I have no idea now if Jesus was real or not, or if he was real, whether he said what they too often quoted him as saying about his returning in power before his generation was over, but if he said it, then we know it's not true. They tried to cover it up, and I know that it was what I heard our preacher preach to us, but they never said anything about how he is quoted as returning in his generation, or even the next. Never!" I raged on.

"Uh, he preached that he was coming as they say now that he is supposed to?" she asked.

"Yes. That he was coming back, and many wouldn't see death before his return. The gospels quote him several times, but it never happened. What they've always told us about is from a letter that was supposed to be from Paul that says that we don't know when he's coming back, but he will. Someone tried to cover up the lies with another lie even though a previous letter by Paul says similar to what Jesus is quoted as saying. My brother Matthew died because of the lies they preach, and I have no idea where Sarah is, or how she is, nor Rebecca either, but they've all been put through a hell that they created. I hate them, hate them!" I raged.

My sweet Janet held me and let me cry it out even to letting me soak her top again. Finally, she had to let me go.

"Honey, I have to get the groceries in. Will you be okay for a minute?"

I nodded, then got up to help her, moving jerkily, but moving and trying to get past my miserable feelings. She couldn't help but hearing and seeing me still sobbing. I smelled the still hot pizza, its aroma appealing, but not enough to quell my misery. We had everything in shortly in spite of my sad state.

"I'll be right back," Janet said as she left me with a kiss.

I thought that she had to go pee; maybe she did, but when she came out, she was naked.

My eyes narrowed instantly, my nostrils flared, and I stared at her sexy bosom rising and falling so much that it told me of her intent, but also that she was as excited as she had quickly made me. Then I looked down between her legs at her already glistening pussy, how her lips were already distended, splayed and ready for my mouth, my tongue.

Moving to her, she let me push her back until she was at the sofa's edge, then sitting, waiting for me. My sudden hungering had me like a she wolf knowing that she had to have nourishment so she could in turn feed her pups. I was on her and taking her roughly, lifting her legs so lewdly over my shoulders, licking and sucking her furiously. There was a different volcano erupting from within me.

All I knew was that I had to have her, and I took and took, and took some more. Her hips often trying to lift up almost as madly as my taking of her, her orgasms coming harshly, then seeking more of them. After a while, my mind started to return to normal though I was still hungering for her. I wondered if I had been at her pussy too long, and much too roughly.

At last, tears seeped quietly out of my eyes and onto her pussy's lips and thighs, and my face followed, burrowing itself in the beauty of her love, of her marvelous sex.

"I love you, honey," she whispered quietly, but with a passion in her voice that spoke of all the beauty of her love.

"I'm sorry I mistreated you, Janet," I whispered into her pussy that I didn't want to leave.

"Mm, why, honey? That was more than just hot and sexy. I'm just sorry it was started by you as you were, but maybe that's what made you do hot, huh? I mean, what pushed you so much. Now if you're finished temporarily with your reading, go take your clothes off so I can see all of you and maybe stoke up my furnace again. Whadda ya say, honey?" she asked with a bit of a smile to her words.

I had to smile a bit, then started to get up. So did she, and she held me, then pulled me into a deep and hard hug, and kissed me as if her furnace was already boiling over.

"Now git," she said, and lightly smacked my butt.