Collection of Erotic Film Reviews

PASSION AND PREJUDICE (2001) Erotic drama. Made for American TV movie about a repressed university professor who after a life time of dedicating herself to her work takes in a young black day release prisoner to work on her house . Gradually she succumbs to temptation and a steamy relationships ensues. She gradually becomes increasingly obsessed and possessive with disastrous results when the prisoner is released and forms a relationship with a new girl friend of his own age. A good story but let down by poor acting and a plot that stretches credibility. 4/10

PASSION OF AYN RAND (THE)

1999 Drama. Lesser known interesting love triangle drama based on true story of the famous philosopher Ayn Rand and her relationship with a young married couple who are both mesmerized and infatuated by her. The story in the beginning is set in 1949 but the story runs through to 1977. Helen Mirren stars in this as the philosopher and delivers a great performance as a selfish , controlling, uncompromising intellectual. The Mirren character pushes and cajoles the young couple into marriage that is not right for them for her own amusement . Watchable. 7/10

PEACE, LOVE, MISUNDERSTANDING

2012 Comedy drama. Divorcing mother takes her 2 teenage children to stay at her own hippie mother's house in Woodstock. The grandmother's character is like Barbra Streisand's in Meet The Fockers. Actually quite a sweet film, with both teenagers and the mother finding love and solace in one form or another. Various prejudices and attitudes are challenged. Watchable. 6/10

PERFECT ENDING (A)

2012 Romantic lesbian romantic drama about an uptight socialite who finds the love of her life in a high priced female escort. They fall in love and there is much 12 rated passion. It sounds preposterous and it is. Also the film is punctuated by slow , arty farty artistic indulgent imagery, and the dialogue is hard to decipher above the over loud invasive musical score. Absolutely not erotic. It was a struggle to make it through to the end. Mediocre. 3/10

PERFECT LIFE

2010 Erotic teen drama. I really tried with this film and for a while thought it was better than the other reviews give it credit for. But it starts mediocre and goes downhill from there. It gets increasingly weird so in the end you do not know what is really happening and what is dreamt or imagined. It should be a simple story about two friends who are competing for the love of the same woman but the film just gets totally surreal . In the end I think it turned out that the two main characters had been dead for most of the film but I would not swear to that. Sienna Guilloy is gorgeous and there is some exciting scenes of youth , sex and drugs culture but in the end it is just too confusing and weird. Give it a miss I say. 4/10

PLACE BEYOND THE PINES (THE)

2012 Drama. Touching and emotional intelligent thriller in which Ryan Gosling brilliantly stars as a motor cycle stunt rider who turns to crime in an attempt to raise the cash to win back his former lover. The plot unfolds to become a story with depth and messages about class, opportunity and chance. A superb social commentary in the Crash mould which features prejudice, corruption , and the drugs culture. A film of two halves in which one story leads to another eighteen years later. Great cast, acting, direction and sound track. I do not understand some of the negative reviews. This an excellent and highly under rated film. 9/10

PLAIN DIRTY

2001. Thriller. Set in an isolated remote poor community in the US. Strange tale of young girl with an abusive husband who has him murdered by her husband's simpleton assistant. Meanwhile she is having a fling with another man she believes to be her soul mate! The girls seems to become progressively dirtier and covered in mud throughout the film , and covered in blood and grazes. Just to make sure she is also speckled in blood from a goose she decapitated. Plain weird. 3/10

PLEASURE OR PAIN

2012 soft porn drama. Modern rendition of the well worn theme of dominant male who takes a young woman who is infatuated by him and leads her into a world of decadence and S & M. She only wants to be loved by him, but he on the other hand is only satisfied by abusing her and stretching her by subjecting her to a constant stream of sexual encounters well beyond her limits and comfort zone. It is actually better than most films of this genre and the acting is not such a disaster as is typical. Every bit as good as Fifty Shades if not better. It even has a real and significant ending when she can take no more and breaks. Much simulated gymnastics and nudity. Watchable if you like this sort of thing. 5/10

POET (THE) Erotic thriller. Awful film. Appallingly acted and rubbish script. Assassin supposedly falls for the sister of innocent young man that he has killed because he witnessed him killing the real target victim. The sister is the worst actress I have ever come across. Absolutely no idea why it is an 18. There is nothing erotic and no nudity. I gave up half way through. Rubbish! 2/10

POOR COW. British kitchen sink docudrama style which pre dates similarly themed Mike Leigh films. This was an attempt to bring the success of the TV game changer play Cathy Come Home to the big screen. In its day Poor Cow was shocking and ground breaking. Now sadly it appears very dated and poorly acted. Carol White as the lead really was not a great actress. The basic story is about a young promiscuous mother living in poverty with her husband in jail during the swinging 60s sexual revolution in London. The film tried to shock by portraying the new attitudes to sex. The film does not live up to its iconic reputation and by modern standards is watchable but only average. 5/10

POSSESSION (2002) love story drama. Underrated love story / period drama. Thoroughly recommend this. Gwyneth Paltrow is brilliant as ever. You get two parallel interleaved love story dramas, one in the present day, and one from the Victorian era (about a famous poet and his mistress) that the modern day characters are researching. Touching and pleasant drama although ultimately the period drama strand is a tragedy. Well acted by all. 8/10

POSSESSION (2009) Drama / thriller. A poor made for TV film with a totally ridiculous plot, poor script and weak acting. A freak car accident puts wife's husband and brother in law into comas. The brother in law wakes up first and thinks he is his brother-as does the wife! In a feat a human endurance I made it through to the end but strongly advise you not to bother. It is rubbish. 2/10

PRECIOUS. Shocking , hard hitting, story about an obese black American girl who is repeatedly raped by her father and has two children by him. Her mother treats her cruelly and as a slave. She is taken under the wing of her teacher and eventually and very slowly escapes the misery and cruelty of her home. The film is sobering and humbling , but has an annoying 'fly on the wall' reality show camera style. Also the dialogue is mumbled and often hard to decipher. 5/10

PRICELESS

. French film with sub titles. Enjoyable and very funny in parts RomCom yarn about hotel worker who forms a relationship with a girl who makes her living from sugar daddies. He also starts doing the same with rich middle aged women and they both them have lucrative side liaisons going on whilst they actually fall in love with each other. 6/10

PRIDE (2014)

Political Comedy. An entertaining film set against the back drop of the miners' strike in the 1980s.A group of homosexuals who are also challenging the police authorities and campaigning for rights and causes form an alliance with the miners in their parallel struggle. They call themselves the Lesbian and Gays support The Miners (LGSM). An uplifting film based on a true story .This is a very popular and highly rated feel good movie about the struggle for gay rights .My criticisms would be that it fails to develop the miner's struggle sufficiently and also that the film sort of peters out being unsure where to go with its momentum and ends up meandering a little. 7/10

PRINCESSES

(2005) Drama . Sad and touching film about friendship between two down beaten prostitutes trying to make it in a Spanish city in very tough circumstances. Well acted, bleak, and realistic . A good film and much better than most in this genre. It is a serious film without gratuitous sexual content and very watchable. Spanish film with sub titles. 6/10

PROPOSAL (THE)

2000 The Proposal. Thriller. Made for TV or straight to Video B movie with an entertaining plot. An undercover detective investigating a dangerous crime boss needs to introduce a 'wife' in order to attend social functions at the home of the baddie. He is unmarried in his private life and another very attractive police woman is found to work with him as his 'mate'. The inevitable happens and they are attracted to each other and things get very complicated and dangerous. This film is good in parts and some of the acting is pretty good. It is definitely watchable but the film tries for too many twists, some of which do not work, and the ending is rushed and unconvincing. 5/10

Q

2011 Erotic drama. French with sub-titles. This movie is very daring showing many non-simulated sex scenes, what is very rare in mainstream movies. Unusually the film shows actual penetration of various forms so graphic and explicit it certainly is. The plot revolves around the lives of some characters around Cecile, the main central protagonist in the drama, and how she changes their lives. Cecile is a desirable girl. She knows it and uses herself as a weapon. Even though she has a boyfriend she flirts and leads on every man she runs into. Once she has their attention and their sex drive on full she usually goes away leaving them frustrated with her panties or her phone number. But there is some plot and story in this and some limited character development all of which are rare in a soft porn full length film. Some scenes are certainly hot and arousing as you get to know the characters a little. But you need to concentrate on this film especially in the first half hour to keep up with who is who and get the most out of it. 6/10

REACHING FOR THE MOON. Lesbian romance based on true story about love affair between American bishop and Brazilian architect Lota de Macedo Soares (I had never heard of her either). Set in 1950s mainly in Brazil. The poet comes between an existing lesbian couple. The story tracks the stresses and strains between the 3 women Watchable. Average. 5/10

REBOUND (THE) RomCom about a 40 year old mother (Catherine Zeta Jones) who is divorcing her unfaithful husband and moves to New York. There she falls for her 25 year old male nanny , after he shows himself to be fantastic with her kids. I am not a Catherine Zeta Jones fan and never believe she is much of an actress I am afraid. This film is predictable, formulaic, cheesy and the script is poor. It is a watchable reasonably innocuous, chick flick but that is all. Not particularly funny either. 4/10

RED STATE. Thriller set in Middle America, a group of teens receive an online invitation to some MMMF sex, but instead they find themselves in captivity by some religious fundamentalists with a much more sinister agenda. Builds to an utterly ridiculous climax-a sort of serious straight version of the Hot Fuzz comedy . You just cannot take this film seriously. Weird 4/10

RETURN TO ME

Romance with unusual original heart wrenching plot. Amusing weepie. David Duchovny (X files). Millie Driver. Watchable and innocuous. Some comedy. 6/10

RICH MAN'S WIFE (THE) Erotic Thriller. Traditional 1990s erotic thriller fare, formulaic and predictable but watchable and enjoyable. Halle Berry is good in this as the abused wife but Clive Owen is as useless as ever and the film is the poorer for his inclusion in the cast. Overall adequate. 4/10

RIFF RAFF Comedy drama. Building site worker (Robert Carlyle) finds a handbag in a skip and returns it to its owner and forms a relationship with her (Emer McCourt). Story depicts a tough harsh life for all the cast in this down to earth , working class drama. The film is typical of the director, Ken Loach, (Cathy Come Home) . The girlfriend is a very needy insecure and desperate character who is constantly terrified of the relationship ending. A very good film but I did not find it a comedy- more a serious drama making some left wing political points. A lot of the dialogue is hard to decipher. 7/10

ROGUE RIVER horror / thriller . Has similarities to Wolf Creek. If you liked that you will like this. It is a good bread and butter horror / thriller. Absolutely not for the squeamish or easily shocked . Don't watch it unless you have a strong stomach for torture and violence. Has a climax scene that will offend some. Definitely watchable if you like this sort of thing. 6/10

SAFE HAVEN Romantic drama. Innocuous and harmless average romantic drama. More of a chick flick really. Young girl flees violent Boston cop partner and escapes to a small seaside town- Southport in North Carolina. Actually Southport was the star of this film for me and looked so nice I want to visit! Anyway back to the film, the girl falls in love with a handsome widower with the usual two adorable children. Eventually, predictably, the rogue cop ex partner finds her and attempts to upset the apple cart. Predictable, soppy, and sweet watchable film for a rainy afternoon. Spoilt a little by an unbelievably cheesy cringe making twist at the end. 5/10

SATURDAY NIGHT AND SUNDAY MORNING kitchen sink classic. Worth watching as a rare view of life at the end of the 1950s in an industrial city in the Midlands (Nottingham), and a window on how people and families behaved towards each other. Life was grey and hard in those days and the black and white seems to emphasise this aspect. Also a portrayal of how stilted and awkward relationships were between the sexes. A bit like A kind of Loving really. Not a lot happens by modern taste -like a modern Mike Leigh film, and the film fizzles out without any real ending or conclusion . But the film is watchable and compelling as a window on life over 50 years ago . 7/10

SAY NOTHING

2001. Erotic Thriller. Low budget US probably made for TV love triangle formulaic film . A sort of second rate Fatal Attraction. A handsome rich business man seduces a married woman for a one night stand, which comes home to haunt her when unbeknown to her, he then hires her husband. Usual power plays follow and it ends in tears. The Boss drives a wedge between the couple, and manipulates them in order to win the wife. Dodgy acting but just about watchable. 4/10

SCANDAL

(1989) Drama. A fictionalised account of the infamous 1963 Profumo scandal that rocked the British Conservative government. An affair between the married Minister of War and a society good time girl was revealed to the press and all hell broke loose. The bigger issue was the girl was also having a relationship with a Russian spy at the same time thus in theory creating a security risk. However this film concentrates on the life of Stephen Ward , a high society socialite and fixer, who worked as an osteopath, who for amusement collected a small team of attractive racy young women friends and used them to gain entry to and tempt his high society network of friends. One of these girls, Christine Keeler became the girl at the centre of the scandal. The film is intriguing and watchable but fails to delve deeply enough into Ward's motives, and also into the feelings of the two most famous recruits, Keeler and her friend Mandy Rice Davies. The versions available for rent and purchase on DVD are sadly heavily censored with chunks cut out. John Hurt stars and is excellent as the seedy but loveable rogue Ward. 6/10

SEA OF LOVE

1989 Thriller. Al Pacino is great as veteran cop in a good erotic thriller. Good cast. Good watchable thriller. Plot keeps you guessing 6/10

SECRET (THE)

2007. Also know as Un Secret. WW2 drama . French film with subtitles. A touching, sad emotional story about a boy who as he grows up after the second world war gradually uncovers some very difficult truths about his Jewish parents who had lived through and survived living in Nazi-occupied France. A great story of passion and love superbly acted by an excellent cast and which is surprisingly very good for a French film, and an underrated relatively unknown offering. 8/10

SECRETARY

2002 If there was ever a film that shows that one mans's meat is another's poison this is it. Oh how taste differs! This is a low budget soft porn story about a masochist submissive girl and a dominant OCD boss. I thought I would be the only person who ever got to the end of this movie before I was shocked to see the rave reviews. It is neither erotic or funny or credible. It is nothing other than ridiculous. Complete rubbish. Don't bother. 3/10

SEDUCTION OF JOE TYNAN (THE)

1979 Drama. Very early Meryl Streep film about corruption and affair of up and coming ambitious young American senator. Very underrated film. I like it but many will find it very dated. 8/10

SESSIONS (THE)

2012 Drama. A very brave film that tackles an extremely delicate subject. A paralysed lifelong victim of polio who is a virgin embarks on a course of sex therapy with a professional sexual surrogate therapist brilliantly played by Helen Hunt. The film successfully navigates the tight rope of good taste and delivers a serious , credible, and touching emotional drama about his sexual awakening. The film also manages to be appropriately amusing again always in good taste. This is an uplifting film based on a real man in the USA that tackles a taboo subject with absolute dignity. 8/10

SEX AND LUCIA

2001. Spanish film with sub titles. Very explicit. Good in parts but the plot is very difficult to follow and is about an author writing about another author (himself) and his sex life. A lot of the time you do not know whether what is happening is the story or in the book he is writing. 4/10

SEX TRAFFIC

2006 Gritty drama. Story of two young Mouldovan sisters kidnapped and trafficked through eastern Europe to London Very realistic, thought provoking and scary . 7/10

SEXUAL MALICE

1994. Low budget erotic thriller. Very amateurish. Poorly acted and laughable script. University professor frames his wife for the murder of her lover. Awful. 3/10

SHAME

2011 Drama. Carey Mulligan. A brave film that addresses the difficult subjects of sex obsession and addiction to pornography in an modern American culture where anything goes. It is actually more tragic than I was expecting and packs a hard message that ultimately free sex and promiscuity makes for an empty, hollow , unhappy and lonely life. Shame is worse than that though because this totally selfish , self obsessed character is also totally unable to give love and support even to his sister when she reaches out to and needs him. And when a chance does come along and a bubbly attractive girl comes along who genuinely reaches out and is attracted to the main character he again is unable to respond with anything being emotionally bankrupt and dead inside. As I say it is much harder hitting than I was expecting and is a comment of modern free and easy sexual behaviour and self obsession. Carey Mulligan is superb. Warning -Contains much nudity and sex. 7/10

SHAPE OF THINGS (THE)

2003 Romantic Drama. A strange and unusual film. Had to watch it twice and I did get it the second time. It is supposed to be about superficiality and vanity and appearances, and delusion. But in the end I think it is just about mental cruelty and exploitation in a relationship. Super seductive and attractive Rachel Weisz play an alluring young artist who turns out to be a super opinionated manipulative heartless control freak. She is as superb as ever in this role. Her victim is thoroughly nice and innocent guy Adam played also very well by Paul Rudd. Absolutely massive twist in the finale which explains all that has gone before. This film will not be for everybody but it is definitely watchable. It is not about what you think it is and in the end even the viewer is misled by the Weisz character! 8/10