Indecision

I walked up beside him, but as he went to open his mouth, I just spat out "Shut up." He laughed uproariously, and we set out in search of food.

The next day was pretty boring. We had a long talk about funding in the morning, and then a mind-numbing talk about budgets in the afternoon. By the time dinner came around, I was ready to eat my own hand out of both hunger and boredom. Jim and I were heading back down to the burger spot I'd come to several nights ago, when Mariah walked up and matched my gait. "Where you guys heading?" she asked.

"Dinner. Burgers and beers. You want to join us?" Jim volunteered before I could voice an objection. Truth was, I didn't entirely trust myself around her.

"Love to!" she shot back.

"Great," I added, trying to keep the fluster and frustration with Jim out of my voice. As we exited the lobby, though, Jim added a thought.

"Yeah. Although this number is uneven. I need a date, since you've already got one Marcus." A date? Was he kidding? Shit, I...

"Wait, I have someone I can hit up, she might be available," I shot back, and quickly pulled my phone out to text Charlie.

'Interested in Dinner with me and a couple of friends?' I typed out. Not even a minute passed before she replied.

'Yeah, sounds fun. Was going to do something else but gf just canceled on me. Where?'

'Same place. We're heading over now.'

'Cool, see u there.'

"Got a girl coming for you."

"Damn. Marcus, that's why you're my partner and bestie," Jim shot back. "You get shit done."

"It's just a gal I met the other night. You'll like her, she's spunky."

"Oooh, spunky. I like it when they know what they want. She ride you well?"

"Don't be ridiculous, fucker. You know I wouldn't go there. Especially now."

"What's up?" Mariah inquired toward Jim.

"Marcus and his wife are in a really rough patch right now. I keep encouraging him to even the score, if ya get my drift."

"Thanks for broadcasting my personal shit, dickhead."

"What? I thought it was obvious."

"You do have the look of a guy who hasn't been laid in several months," Mariah offered, looping her left hand in my right arm. "For what it's worth, I think your wife is an idiot. You're hot, and I'd bet money you're the type of stud that'd curl any woman's toes and leave her shaking," she added, giving my bicep a firm squeeze.

"Uh, thanks," I stammered, as I felt my cock give a big twitch in my boxer briefs.

"Keep the faith, hottie. Something good will happen for you soon," she said, pulling herself a little closer into my side. I tried hard to suppress a shiver of excitement at her proximity and contact, with only moderate success, and she looked up at me with a mild smirk. I forced myself to quickly look away.

"So anyway," I said, "what do you guys think of the conference so far." Both Jim and Mariah snorted with laughter, seeing through my obvious ploy.

Dinner was fun, from every angle. Jim and Charlie hit it off like the oldest of friends, joking and flirting so much it was amazing. As we sat there, swapping stories and jokes and downing a couple more beers after dinner was cleared, it was obvious the way our little four top table was dividing, with the two of them increasingly into each other, and me and Mariah slowly leaning in. I was beginning to wonder if I should get out of there—my instincts were telling me that if I didn't, I was likely to end up in that familiar dance—hey, why don't you come to my room for a nightcap, oh, sure, but I can't stay long, and then before you know it, your dick is in the girl's mouth and you're wracked with guilt. So, on the one hand, there was the pull of my still unresolved marriage, a long history, and my children—how could I reconcile losing all of that? On the other, there was this amazing creature I was drawn to, and the promise of bountiful and incredible sex. As we exited the restaurant, Charlie enticed Jim into a drink at her place, and we waved them off as she gave a cursory invite to join—it was pretty obvious Jim was getting laid that night, and I wasn't about to cockblock. As we set back toward the hotel, the sun was slowly moving down, and Mariah suggested a walk on the beach, to which I readily agreed—I was enjoying the night, but also didn't trust myself and felt like it would be a good idea to stay in public with this girl.

Oddly enough, when we got to the beach, it was starting to clear quite a bit, and only a few people remained, which was almost a bit creepy, but then I remembered we were on the eastern seaboard of the country, so without direct sun for the last hour plus, the temperature was no longer ideal for hanging out in just a swimsuit. "It's nice, with it this quiet," she said, leaning into my arm a bit.

"Yeah..." I said hesitantly.

"What's a matter, stud? Don't trust yourself not to rape me out here, alone-ish?"

"Umm...yeah, something like that, I suppose."

"What's really going on with you, anyway?"

"You don't want to hear my problems," I shot back.

"Try me. We're probably not going to see each other after this week, so who am I going to tell?" I glanced at her for a few agonizingly long moments, scanning her face for any ulterior motives. I had no reason to distrust her, other than the fact that she obviously wanted to fuck me. But I also figured I needed a perspective beyond just Jim's, too—I love the guy, but he's a moron sometimes, especially with girls.

"It's just weird. My wife and I, that is..." I began.

"How so?"

"Well, we've been together for a long time. Since college. We've got great kids, but when I started this business, our relationship took a back seat to being a father and CIO..."

"As it does so often..."

"Right. So, anyway, we started to have less time for each other. So she was only working part time, but then she decided that since the kids were old enough, she was going to go back into the workforce again, and she took a new job. But then, she met this guy at work, and they connected or some bullshit, and pretty soon she was making all kinds of excuses about going out with friends or the gym or whatever."

"I think I see where this is going."

"Duh. So I was kind of starting to wonder what was up, but of course you don't want to think that. So I didn't do any searching. But her computer is synced to her phone messaging account, and one day she leaves her laptop open as she dashes out the door, and it was a rare morning where I didn't leave before her. And I'm sitting in the bedroom as it dings, having my morning coffee, and her computer is right there, and even though I tried hard not to look, it was right there..."

"What did it say?"

"Trust me, it wasn't ambiguous at all."

"What did it say?" she pressed.

"I can still smell your sweet pussy all over me from last night. Wish you could have stayed longer."

"Ouch."

"Yeah. So I flipped out, started looking through all her messages. Social media, programs, all of it. Her passwords were super easy to crack, the dog's name plus a number, only took a couple of tries. And I saw it all. Six months of carnage. She tried to tell me it was a one-time thing, and she's still maintaining that. But I know it wasn't just that."

"They never want to admit it."

"Speaking from experience?"

"Yeah, though mine wasn't a very long-lasting relationship, only about 10 months. Plus it was two years ago. Anyway, go on."

"Well, that's pretty much it. I confronted her. We had a blowout. She yelled a lot, and I surprisingly didn't much at all. She lied repeatedly and still hasn't come clean. I slept at Jim's the first night, then a hotel for a couple more, because I couldn't bear to look at her. I came back to find out she'd taken the kids to her Mom's. She threatened to move out. I threatened to rake her over the coals as the unfaithful party and make sure she got nothing in the divorce. Eventually, we established this very tentative truce. She suggested I sleep in the guest room, and I suggested she fuck off, so now there's a distance between us in the bed you could fit two people in. We act like roomies, and we take care of our children like it's a business partnership. Which I suppose it actually is. We haven't even kissed since then. We've been seeing a therapist off and on, but it doesn't seem like there's much progress being made. I get angry because I spent all this time doing this shit for her, so we could have a bigger house and better things and all that crap, and she runs off and shags some dipshit like it's nothing."

"Ouch."

"Yeah."

"So what's next?"

"The eternal question. Honestly, I have no idea. I don't want to put my kids through a divorce and all the requisite carnage that comes with it, but I also don't know how long I can stay in an unhappy marriage."

"No notions of carrying on and just playing around?" she asked, wheeling around in front of me and stopping in her tracks. I had to take a moment to respond, checking all of the emotions that were flying around in my chest.

"Definitely not. I'm not that type of guy."

"Why not? Is it just the sneaking around and lying that doesn't appeal to you, or is it a moral objection?"

"Mostly moral. I almost feel like I could play around and flaunt it in her face and she'd deserve it at this point. But I don't want to be a cheater. I've never done that and I don't think I want to start now."

"So hypothetically, if an attractive stranger on a beach far, far away from home invited you back to her hotel room for an evening of wild, uninhibited, no-strings private bumping..."

"I'd have to say no," I laughed "even if I was ridiculously tempted."

She shrugged. "Can't blame a lady for trying."

"Fair enough." We stood in silence for a few uncomfortable moments, before she returned to my side and put her arm in mine again to indicate we should begin walking again. After a few steps, I asked her, "So...question. How did you get over being cheated on?"

She shrugged again. "Time, mostly. Mine was a different situation. I dumped him immediately when I found out and he wouldn't be honest with me. Then I got on Tinder and fucked a couple of other guys to get him out of my head." I laughed and shook my head. "What," she continued, "haven't you ever heard that old joke? The quickest way to get over someone..."

"Is to get under someone else. Yeah, I have. Not sure about it, though."

"Well, trust me, it helps."

"I'll take your word for it."

We continued on for another minute in silence, before she spoke up again. "I have a crazy idea, if you're willing to listen."

"What's that?"

"How about if you dig out your phone, and we snap a few naughty pics? A little something for your personal spank bank."

"How would that help?"

"Well, you get to have some fun with another girl without breaking your moral code. And I could get off knowing that you're looking at me and stroking your big hard dick at my pictures."

"I don't know..."

"Come on. I promise to keep my hands to myself."

"It just seems a bit weird..."

"This whole situation is weird. We both want to be bad, but you can't, which I respect. Plus, in case you haven't guessed, I haven't had a ton of men turn me down when I offer to touch their cock."

"I figured."

"You may actually be the first since I was 15 and had glasses and zits."

"Fair enough," I added with a laugh.

"So let me do this for you."

"Um, okay. Where?"

"How about right here?"

I looked around. We had walked far enough and traveled behind enough dunes that the section of beach we were on was deserted. There was still probably at least a half hour or more of light left from the descending sun. I shrugged and gestured my assent.

"Great!" she beamed. "Get out your phone."

"Won't you be cold?"

"I'll be fine." And with that, she took off her hoodie, and laid it on the ground. Kneeling, she whipped off her shirt, and I felt my own internal temperature raise. I started snapping pictures like there was no tomorrow. "I'm going to give you a show you'll remember, cutie," she added, and I watched as she slowly did a striptease, removing her bra, and playing with her breasts and rolling her thick coral-colored nipples between her fingers and thumbs to make them stand up even more. I clicked away as she laid on her back, sensually stripping away her jeans to reveal a lacy matching thong, which she played with for a few agonizingly slow moments before slowly sliding it off. She slowly caressed her thighs up and down, moving in closer to her shaved mound with each pass upward. As she opened up her legs for me more, I got the first scent of her feminine lubrication, and realized that I was incredibly hard and uncomfortably straining against my jeans. I paused my snapping to adjust myself, and she smiled at my condition. She began to slowly pass over her opening, very lightly tracing over her lips and opening, and her lips began to spread a bit as she became more aroused. "Hey, I have an idea," she piped up.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Come here," she said, patting the ground between her knees.

"Um, okay..." I said, hesitantly complying.

"Switch to video. I'll play with myself, and if you get it from this angle. When you look at it later, it'll be like a POV shot of you fucking me."

"Okay..." I replied. I was beginning to get a bit overly stimulated by the situation.

"Good!" she said cheerily, and as I internally gave up and switched to video, she began very lightly brushing over her clit. I marveled as I tried to focus on my phone, the vantage point was fantastic. After a few moments, she began to slowly rub her clit, and I noticed that she was beginning to lube liberally. Her breathing began to increase, and she started emitting some very soft moans. "I love having my clit played with just as much as any girl," she said, rubbing it even faster, "but baby, what really, really gets me off is a really big, hard dick hitting my g spot hard. It's the quickest way to make me cum." She quickly dove two fingers into her slit, pushing in with almost no resistance. "My fingers work, but a big dick is so much better to hit everything and get me there nice and quick."

I was transfixed, as I watched her start pushing into her pussy with abandon. Her hand quickly became a blur as she began to make slapping noises from the impact of her hand, and after what seemed like a very short time, she visibly came, arching her hips up and crying out as her body trembled. "Oh god, that was a good one!" she yelled out, and after a few moments of recovery, she put her ass back down on her sweater and started in again, hooking her fingers into herself aggressively as she reached up and torqued her left nipple hard, twisting it. I was overwhelmed, not knowing where to look, struggling to keep my phone hand steady due to the spectacle before me, the smell of her heavenly scent, and the sheer eroticism of the spectacle before me. She was climbing rapidly again, and it seemed like only another few moments before she came hard again, releasing a strangled yowl. As she slowly came back to earth, she looked at me with hooded eyes and said, "I normally never cum this hard. I guess you watching me has me all worked up."

"I know the feeling."

"Poor guy," she observed with a wicked half smile, looking down at my engorged prick, aching to get out of my jeans. "Too bad I can't give him any relief." She pulled her fingers out of herself, brought them up to her mouth to lick them, then stopped short. "You strike me as a guy that really likes to pleasure a woman."

"Well, I..." I replied, but was cut short as she thrust them into my mouth. I was overwhelmed, the taste of her was heavenly and aromatic, and as I closed my eyes and sucked in her juices, I felt her close around me, her body pressed to me tightly. She felt amazing, her firm breasts thrust against my chest as she deftly replaced her fingers with her tongue, and I was completely lost as I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her back, my hands exploring her ass and the smooth skin of her back.

"If you want more of that, you can get it directly from the source," she whispered into my ear, as she slid back onto the ground, opening her legs and beckoning me with her finger.

For a brief moment, I advanced. I was possessed of nothing but lust, a desire to dive between her legs and taste her delicious juices and then fuck her until we were both sore. But then, a pang of guilt took over. A voice in my head resoundingly said "No, this isn't what you wanted." I hesitated, then stopped completely. "I...I can't. I'm sorry." And I got up and started running. She called out after me, but I was already committed, sprinting as hard as I could, running like crazy. I went on and on until my legs burned, driven by panic and guilt, until finally, I had to stop. I slumped over, putting my hands on my quads as I wheezed and tried to avoid retching, and as I glanced back, I didn't even see a trace of her. Looking up, I saw my hotel in the distance, and I was amazed I'd covered this much ground so quickly. I spent another minute or so letting my breathing and heart rate return to something approximating normal, and then made my way up to the hotel. As I got into the room, I began to pace, angrily, going over the whole scene. How could I have been so stupid? I was only a few moments away from fucking her, the thing I swore I wouldn't do, and I was upset with myself. Was I overthinking this? She had pushed my boundaries, sure, but should I have just done it? Was I brave, or was I just a pussy? As I was stewing in my outrage, I heard a soft knock on the door. I charged over and threw it open, and was surprised to see Mariah in the doorway. "What?!" I spat out indignantly.

"I'm sorry," she offered meekly.

"Okay," I said curtly, not in the mood to deal with her. "Anything else?"

"Yeah, this," she added, reaching into her back pocket and producing my phone. "You forgot it. I thought you might want it back."

"Oh. Um, thank you." I hadn't even processed that it wasn't in my pocket.

"You're welcome, brand new iPhone, and I know that's expensive. I thought you might want it back."

"Yeah."

"I was way out of line, I should have respected your boundaries. I'm sorry, and I'll leave you alone. If you want to, we can talk some other time. I just wanted to return that to you before you went out and blew a bunch of money on a replacement you don't need."

"I appreciate that. Thank you again."

"Sure thing. Goodnight." With that, she turned and started to walk down the hall.

"Hey," I called out after her, and she turned around and looked at me expectantly. "How'd you find out what room I was in?"

"I ran into Jim in the lobby. I don't think his date went swimmingly, honestly. But I explained to him what happened—in general terms, don't worry—and told him I needed to apologize and give it back to you."

"Okay. Thanks again."

"Don't mention it," she said, turning on her heel. "You're actually only six doors down from me," she called out over her shoulder. As she strode down the hall, I caught myself looking at that amazing ass again. I quickly closed my door and sat down, chiding myself for the events of the evening again. After a few minutes of stewing, I turned on the TV, but eventually, I gave up switching through the channels and pulled up the video. Guiltily, I pleasured myself to it twice that night before I finally fell into a fitful sleep.

The next day I went through the conference in a bit of a daze. Jim and I grabbed lunch, and I filled in the blanks for him. "You're a much stronger man than I, my friend. I'd have fucked her till the sun came up."

"I nearly did."

"Well, no judgement here if you did. But I'm glad you feel good about your decision."

I hesitated and then changed the subject. "So how was your night, anyway? Mariah said you looked frustrated."