It Didn't Work Out Ch. 11

They talked for a little while longer before Bridget pushed back from the table. Rising up she looked at Don. "I'm sorry Don. I really am. I was content with what we had ... before. Now, I can't be," she quietly told him. She considered giving him a hug but then just turned to go get her brother.

As Bridget and Riley walked out, Don didn't even look up. Riley glanced at him and then looked away. He wanted to say something but couldn't think of what. Bridget gathered up a last few things before going out the door. She went out first. Looking back at Don, Riley saw him get to his feet and head over to get a drink. Riley had a suspicion that Don was planning on feeling pretty bad in the morning. "I'd probably do the same," he thought as he shut the door behind them.

The next few weeks seemed to fly by in a blur to Bridget. It took a few days to find lawyers for her and Don. It turned out that Riley was able to help a lot with that. They found a group that specialized in collaborative divorces that would work together to get something that Don and Bridget both felt was fair.

After thinking about it, Don decided he didn't want the house either. He wasn't giving up on Bridget completely but the idea of being there without her was just too much to take. And no matter what, Don knew the divorce was going to happen. If they could get back together, it would have to be after that. Selling the house would make things easier. He didn't like it, but at least if they could avoid any fighting he had hopes that they could stay friends. And if there was any chance that he could get her back, it would have to start with friendship. It worked in college.

It took Bridget almost a month to get into an apartment. To start off with, she had to figure out where she wanted to live. She didn't want to stay close to the house. She needed a change and being around in that area meant having to explain what had happened when she ran into people she knew. She thought about just moving close to work and making things easy for a while. She looked around for a while but couldn't find anything that seemed right. Bridget was complaining one night to Riley when he looked at her.

"You are trying to come to grips with being a lesbian, right?" he asked Bridget. Not sure why he was bringing it up, she nodded at him. "Then why aren't you looking in the gay district? Don't you think that might be helpful?" He laughed at her as she blinked. "Why did I ever think you were the smart one?" Riley said.

After that it went fairly fast. Bridget was able to find an older apartment that had a lot of character. It was just about the same commute time as her house, just coming from the opposite direction. She signed the lease but had to wait for a week until the current tenants moved out. As much as she knew that her brother loved her, Bridget could tell that he was glad to get his place back. She was cramping his style with the various girls that he was dating. Bridget had enjoyed getting to know them but had actually created a score card to keep them straight and not say the wrong thing. When she left, she gave it to him with a plus next to the ones that she liked.

For the most part, Bridget just told people that she and Don had grown in different directions and she had decided that she wasn't happy. After they tried for a couple of months work things out, she made the decision to file for a divorce. Her parents were upset but there wasn't much they could do. They called and talked to Don. He stuck with Bridget's story. Despite his efforts to try and reconcile, things didn't get any better with Bridget. She was cordial but no more. He didn't feel like it was his place to out Bridget.

There were a few close friends who Bridget did tell the real reason she ended the marriage. For the most part, her friends were supportive but she was surprised when one old college friend stopped talking to Bridget after she found out. It surprised Bridget but in the end she realized that there was nothing she could do. Some people just couldn't adapt.

The whole time Bridget never called Sian. There were probably a dozen times when she picked up her cell phone and looked at Sian's contact record. But every time she put it down without calling her. Bridget had hurt Sian so much, she was afraid to try reaching out to her. She imagined that the last thing that Sian wanted was to talk to her. Bridget felt very fragile and being rejected by Sian would be too much to take. It was better to not know.

Even when Bridget had lunch with Viola, she made Viola promise not to tell Sian or any of Sian's friends before she would tell Viola anything. After giving Bridget a huge hug at the news, Viola protested the promise she had given Bridget. "Hon, if you are going to accept yourself, you need to let Sian know. I don't talk to Sian about you or to you about Sian. I'm Switzerland in all this. But even if she doesn't want to see you, I think it would help her to know it."

Bridget looked at Viola and then shook her head. "I understand, but I can't yet. I'm still just holding it together. I can't face her yet. And telling her would mean facing her at some point," she said. Viola noticed Bridget's face get a little red. Viola waited without saying anything. Eventually Bridget spoke again. "I guess I want to wait until I am divorced. Then it's real. I know it's stupid, but I want her to know that I'm not playing at things anymore."

Viola had understood and told her that she would keep her promise. Even though Viola was the only person she knew from her time with Sian, it still felt like Bridget was taking another step in her new life.

The next big step had come as a surprise and it wasn't anything she did. Don called her one afternoon. It had been just over two months since she had moved out. When she saw that it was him, Bridget almost didn't answer the phone. She had been doing everything she could to discourage Don thinking that they could get back together. And it seemed to be working. His attempts seemed to be dwindling away. At the same time, she couldn't just cut him off.

"Hi Don," Bridget said as she answered the phone.

"Hey, Bridget," Don said back. His greeting was indicative of the change. For a long time, he had continued to call her Honey. But when she never once responded with anything other than Don, he had lately just been calling her by her name.

"What's up," Bridget asked. She tried to be polite and friendly but keep talks to a minimum.

"I had a couple of things to check with you about," Don said. He asked a few questions about some bills and gave her an update on the house. It was going into the final few steps before closing. They both hoped that it would be done before the divorce finalized in about a month. None of it seemed particularly important to Bridget and she wondered why he was calling.

"Um, there is one other thing," Don began. He sounded nervous. It made Bridget think that he was going to make another attempt at getting things started between them. She tried to suppress the sigh she felt like making. "You know, it's been a while since we separated," Don continued. "And even before, I know things weren't good. I've, uh, been pretty unhappy."

Now Bridget was starting to get confused. "Where is he going with this," she wondered.

"Anyhow I went out after work the other day, and some of the people met up with friends. And Jim from accounting introduced me to a friend of his girlfriend." Don paused again. He seemed to be struggling with what to say. "And she and I enjoyed talking. At the end of the evening, she gave me her number and asked me to call her."

"Well that's good Don," Bridget said, finally realizing what this was all about.

"Is it?" Don said. It was clear he wasn't really asking or expecting an answer and Bridget stayed quiet. Finally, he spoke again. "We aren't going to get back together, are we? I mean there is no chance."

"No, Sweetie. We aren't. I'm happy with my choice," Bridget gently said. It was the first time in forever that she had used her endearment for him. But now it meant something different and they both knew it. They shared a past together and she cared deeply for him. And knowing that she did care made Don feel better.

"So you don't mind if I go out with her?" Don realized that it was a stupid question but he still felt like he had to ask it.

"Of course not. And you don't need to ask every time some hot young thing gets interested in you. You are a great guy, Don. She won't be the only one," Bridget said. The smile on her lips came through in her voice.

"Thanks, Bridget," Don said. After a moment he added, "I'm glad we are friends. Thanks for making sure we kept that."

"It's important to me too, Don. Thanks for doing your part," Bridget said. They both said goodbye and the call ended. Bridget sat at her desk for a few minutes. She thought about Don moving on with his life and she smiled. It felt good to know that he was trying to find his own happiness rather than putting it on her. It was never going to happen but she always felt bad when she gently but firmly pushed back on his attempts to get back with her. And she wanted him to be happy. Once again she thought about him generally being a good guy as she started to get back to work. But hopefully he also had learned a few lessons too, she thought.

A month later, Bridget was getting her mail as she came home from work. There was a large envelope. Her heart beat a little faster as she looked at the return address. It was from the county courthouse. Rushing upstairs, she opened it as soon as she got in the door. It was what she expected. She was divorced. It was official now. Not only that but she was no longer Bridget Munroe. When she thought about it, it made no sense to keep on using Don's last name so as part of the divorce she reverted back to using her maiden name. She had actually started the process a while ago at work. It took a little effort but was now known as Bridget Fontaine there. Even her email address had changed. Now that it was legal, she would begin changing the things like bank accounts. It had bothered Don a little to start with. But the last time they were together for a meeting as part of selling the house, he had introduced her that way. It earned him a big smile from Bridget.

After reading through the document, Bridget got up and went into the kitchen with it. She took one of the magnets on the refrigerator and hung it up there. She didn't know what she would do with it in the long run but right now it was proof of her freedom to be herself. Bridget felt like it was almost the last piece of that process.

Pouring a glass of red wine to drink while she worked on dinner, Bridget thought about her life. Things were going pretty well. The dark depression that followed her even after she left Don was now in the past. At her last session with Susan, they had decided not to schedule another one. Susan wanted her to take a break for a month and then see whether or not she needed to start again. So far, Bridget didn't think she would.

Even when she went to visit her parents shortly after that, Bridget hadn't changed her mind about needing to see Susan. Getting up the courage to tell her parents about the real reason she was divorcing Don had been hard. It was probably the hardest thing she had done except for telling Don it was over. If Riley hadn't insisted on coming with her, she wasn't sure she could have gone through with it. Bridget was fairly sure that she would have chickened out.

It wasn't really a surprise, but she had become much closer to Riley over the last months. Even after she moved out, Riley made it a point to see her at least once a week. When he could see she wasn't doing as well, it was more. Most of the time he was just spending time with her but sometimes they would talk about what was going on with her. And at the same time while he never acknowledged it, Bridget noticed that the women that he mentioned seeing were the ones that she had approved. She loved that Riley seemed happier too.

At first Bridget didn't want to drag him into what was sure to be a giant conflict with at least her mother. But Riley wouldn't let her get away with that. "I want them to know that I am standing with you on this, and if they shut you out then they are shutting me out too. I love you, sis. I'm not letting you do this on your own," he told her.

So when Bridget sat down with her parents in their living room, Riley was sitting right next to her. It was almost as bad as Bridget expected. Her mother didn't wait until Bridget was done. She interrupted Bridget to tell her that she was no daughter of hers. "I'm not going to listen to you tell me about how you are going to live a depraved life," Bridget's mother said as she stood up. She walked to the edge of the living room and looked back at her husband. "Are you coming?" she asked in a furious voice.

What happened next shocked both Bridget and Riley. Their father had always been fairly meek and did whatever their mother said. But this time was different. He calmly looked at Bridget's mother and simply said, "No. I'm not." Despite the vicious glare that she sent him, he just looked at her. Finally she stalked out of the room and went upstairs. They could all hear the sobs drifting down the stairway.

Bridget's father shook his head and looked back at Bridget. "Are you happy, Bridget?" he asked.

"I'm happier than I have been in a long time, Daddy," Bridget said, trying to ignore the noise her mother was making.

"Okay then, that's what a parent should want for his child," he said. "Or her child," he added after a moment. "I wish things were different, but this isn't something I get to choose. As long as it feels right, you have my love and support."

Bridget got up and gave him a huge hug that he returned. It felt like back when she was little. Her dad was always the one that she could go to for sympathy. It sometimes got him into trouble if her mom thought he was being too soft. And over time Bridget had done it less and less, mostly to protect him from the anger that her mother sent his way.

"Don't worry too much about your mother. She is closed minded but eventually I think she will accept it. She will never like it, but I think she can accept it. And if not, we will work out things anyhow," her father told her. He looked over at Riley and gave him a smile. "Thank you for looking out for your sister, Ry. It makes me worry a little less about my little girl."

Riley laughed. "Me too. If I wasn't watching out for her, I would waste too much time worrying about her. It saves me time," Riley said with a smile as Bridget came over and gave him a hug.

Bridget hadn't talked to her mother in the week since that day but her father had called her a couple of times. Each time, he assured Bridget that things were going to be okay and just give it time.

Now it felt like Bridget had almost all the pieces in her new life in place. After the divorce, there was just one more. She pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and set it down on the counter. Dinner was cooking and there wasn't anything else to do for a while. Reaching out she touched the phone for a second but then pulled her hand back. Drinking her wine, Bridget kept looking at the phone and thinking. Finally she picked it up and went to the contacts and found the one she wanted.

Putting the phone to her ear, Bridget listened as it rang.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's Bridget."

"I know. I saw on caller id. What do you want?"

"I just was hoping that we might be able to meet and talk. I wanted to tell you what has been going on with me."

There was silence on the phone. It went on long enough that Bridget pulled the phone away from her ear to make sure she was still connected. Then she heard a sigh.

"I guess I can do that. Where do you want to meet?"

Bridget suggested a coffee shop that wasn't too far away. After they settled on that and a time, Bridget said one more thing. "Kate? I want to ask you not to tell Sian that I called. I know she is your best friend, but I want you to hear what I have to say and then you can decide what I should do. I don't want to hurt her again. Like I said, she is your friend and it's your choice but I think it is best for her."

Again Kate was quiet. "Okay," she finally said. "I'll think about that."

"That's all I can ask," Bridget told her before saying goodbye.

There had been a lot of thinking on Bridget's part before she decided what to do. As much as she missed and still loved Sian, Bridget knew that might not be the best thing for Sian. For one thing, it had been more than five months since their break up. Bridget didn't know if Sian was seeing someone now. There was certainly no reason she shouldn't be, and Bridget knew how wonderful Sian was. It made Bridget sad to think that Sian may have moved on, but it was a real possibility.

Even if Sian wasn't seeing anyone, it still didn't mean it was a good idea to see her again. If she wasn't with someone, it might mean that Sian had really struggled with getting over Bridget. The last thing that Bridget wanted to do was hurt Sian again. In the end, Bridget decided to try talking to Kate. Although Bridget knew that Kate liked her, at least before, she was not going do anything that wasn't in Sian's interests. Bridget hoped that Kate wasn't too mad to even consider helping her with Sian. It was the flaw in Bridget's plan, but she would rather protect Sian than take a chance hurting her.

On the Thursday afternoon that Bridget was meeting Kate, she felt extremely nervous. She had changed outfits twice before going to work. She wanted to look nice without looking like she had dressed up. Before leaving the office, Bridget spent 20 minutes in the women's restroom trying to figure out what to do with her hair. It was a little shorter now and she still wasn't always sure what to do with it. In the end she just kept it straight, the way she normally did at work.

Before leaving, Bridget stuck her head into Bill's office to say goodbye. Although she had worked with him for years, the experience of going through therapy and getting a divorce had made them better friends. Bill and his wife had invited her over for dinner several times since the time that Bill called her into his office.

"See you tomorrow," Bridget told him.

Bill looked her up and down. "You look nice, Bridget. Good luck. I hope it goes the way you want it," he said. Over the course of the dinners, Bridget had told Bill and his wife what had been happening. While Bridget hadn't tried to keep quiet the realization of her sexual orientation, Bill was the only person at work who knew the full story.

"Me too," Bridget said, wearing a nervous smile. She waved goodbye and headed out.

When Bridget got to the coffee shop, she was right on time. She was hoping to be there before Kate, not wanting to make her wait. But when she came in, Bridget saw that Kate had beaten her there. Walking over, Bridget felt her nervousness spike up. Almost every time that she had seen Kate in the past, they greeted each other with a hug. Bridget wasn't sure what to do but when Kate made no effort to get up, Bridget just sat down.

"It's good to see you, Kate," Bridget said. Kate looked pretty much the same, but her face wasn't. Normally she had a big smile. Today it was expressionless. "Thanks for meeting me," Bridget told her.

Kate nodded at Bridget. Finally she said, "Well, I know you weren't trying to hurt Sian. And she went into with her eyes open. But that doesn't mean I am not going to protect her against herself."

"I get that. She is lucky to have someone like you," Bridget told her. Kate didn't say anything again and Bridget was caught in her gaze. It was like Kate was judging her. Unexpectedly Bridget felt her eyes moisten. It made Bridget a little angry at herself. She didn't want to go to pieces there.