Jasmin: Guilt Diary Ch. 01

"There you go. You're alright now," said a deep voice. I knew the voice but couldn't remember who owned it. "You're a sight, lass. A great one, mind you. Told you son. Slopes give the best head. Ye can do anything to 'em. They love it."

I was lying on my back on the bed. I opened my eyes but I couldn't see him clearly. It had to be Ed. Something was irritating my left eye.

I wiped at my eyes. They were sticky. There was mucus and God knows what else on my face. I swallowed down some other goo that was still in my mouth. "Yuk, gross!" I said and sat up over and on the roll bar.

I heard laughter then. There was more than just Ed and his son. The other laugh sounded like Craig. But he didn't know them did he?

I used my blouse to frantically wipe at my eyes so I could see. What the hell was happening?

And there they were; Craig, Rick and Ed were all standing at the foot of Rick's bed.

"Where did you come from?" I asked Craig. "Where's David?" I couldn't stand up because they were crowding me.

"I've been here all afternoon, Jazz," said Craig. "You make great movie material. God, what a slut. I can't wait to get down your throat."

"Shut up, idiot," said Ed. "Where did you get this guy?" he said to Rick. I don't think Ed expected an answer.

"Your brother's still asleep downstairs, Jasmin," Ed told me. "He won't be interfering with our party."

The time on Rick's clock said 17:10. I didn't know what that meant so I asked them what time it was.

Ed looked at the clock. "What time is your date with the boyfriend?"

I told him at seven and Ed said, "Well, you've got plenty of time. It's only ten past four."

"Yeah, Jazzzmin," said Craig. "So show those tits to get the other thunderbird."

The three of them standing there made me feel very afraid, especially since David was asleep downstairs and was no help whatsoever. I might still have been drunk but I didn't feel it anymore.

They were going to rape me. I was about to shrink down on the bed away from them when I understood what Craig said before. "You filmed me!"

I was so mad. Anger with them all rushed through me. It felt like a blush spreading across my body. Instead of shrinking away from them I managed to get to my feet. The shortest one was Craig and even on him I think I only come up to his chin. For what I wanted to do I needed room.

I put my hands on Rick's upper arms and pretended to fall against him.

"Whoa there. Easy Jasmin," he said. "You remember our deal, don't you?"

They were all bastards but one of them I hated most. Now I had the room I needed.

I held Rick's arm with my left hand and lazily lifted my right leg up in front of me, holding my shin in tight with my hand.

"What are you doing Jazz?" Craig asked, laughing. "Some stretching so you can get your ankles behind your ears?"

He was still laughing when I leaned into Rick and thrust my foot down as fast as I could against Craig's knee. I actually felt his knee give way. I think there was a crack but I might have imagined that sound.

Craig fell down. And he was squealing in agony. He sounded like a girl. Rick threw me away from him onto the bed before I could do anything else. I didn't have any other ideas though.

I had to think about everything Damien had shown me before I could do any of it. Striking out like that to hurt people on purpose did not come naturally to me. I needed to plan it. Rick and Ed would be ready for me now. I knew they would get me. What I was thinking about was how to get the tape out of the video camera.

Craig was still writhing around on the floor clutching at his leg.

"Dammit, lass," said Ed. "You fucked him good. That must be his knee bone sticking out oddly like that. Jesus."

Ed picked Craig up under his armpits and helped him out of the room. He said he would take him to the hospital. Rick paced back and forth in his room a few times before he stopped and came back to the bed.

I glanced over at the camera. It was definitely pointing at the bed now and there was a light on the front. Someone must have snuck in from the balcony and operated the camera before. So it was still going. I really needed the tape destroyed. I didn't think about it then but I had caused real harm to that arsehole, Craig and it was on that tape.

"Right," said Rick, running his hand back through his hair. "Don't worry about that jerk. We still have our deal."

"What?" He still wanted to see my breasts.

"Take your top off, Jasmin. Show me those tits and I'll give you a second thunderbird."

"No way. Not on tape. Give me the tape." I jumped off the bed and ran toward the camera. Rick caught me easily and pushed me back to the bed.

I tried again to run around the side. When he stepped toward me I tried to dodge. His hands caught me around the waist. I had a bit of momentum up though and we crashed into Rick's computer desk.

His mouse and keyboard flew off the desk. I think the mouse cracked against the wall. The monitor on the desk fell off the desktop computer box and onto its side but not off the table.

Rick spun me around, groping my breasts and then tossed me back to the bed again. He was laughing. "This is fun Jasmin. Try it again."

The last thing I wanted was to make fun for him. But I found myself smiling as he laughed. Surely I was still drunk. I tried again.

This time I ran to the left of the bedroom. I tried to cut back into the middle to get past him but his reach was too great. Rick caught my arm. I spun around him and he let me go, sending me flying straight through the doorway into the walk in wardrobe.

I fell in amongst where all his jackets and coats hung. As I tried to keep my balance I pulled the whole rack down. They were all over me. I must admit to giggling as Rick moved the fallen rack off me and pushed the coats out of the way so he could see me. Rick didn't seem to care about that anymore than his computer. He pulled me up from the floor and pressed his lips down over mine.

For a moment I was overcome with the situation. I might have even been light headed from the port wine and the running around. But as Damien says, "Everyone makes their own choices." I kissed Rick back, even knowing I shouldn't.

When Rick tried to get his tongue in my mouth I woke up to what I was doing and pushed away. "A New deal," I said. "Give me the tape and you can kiss me all you want."

"How do you say that again?" he said, thinking about something. "It sounds so sexy when you say, NO WAY!" And Rick laughed.

"Tell you what though, Jasmin, you sexy slut. Let me fuck you and you can have the tape."

"No way," I said and he laughed more. "You're not even seeing my breasts now."

Rick pushed me back against the wall where the clothes rail had been. My head hit solidly on the wall as well. I saw a flash of light. No, Diary of My Guilt it wasn't a camera flash. It was my head hitting the wall.

Then his hand was at my throat, squeezing me upwards. What is it with guys and doing that, huh? He stood against me as he did it, one leg forward between mine and I knew there was no way for me to drive my knee into his groin.

I pulled at his hand, wondering if he really would strangle me. But that wasn't what he wanted to do to me. Rick's other hand pulled my blouse out of my jeans and went under it straight to my breasts. He squeezed my throat harder, keeping my attention on trying to pull his hand from my neck so I could breathe. His other hand pulled a bra cup down and grabbed my breast.

"What?" he exclaimed. "Padding! I thought you were a C at least. False advertising. You can get fined for that," he laughed. "You're only a B I'd reckon. Ah, but this is interesting." Rick squeezed my nipple savagely with his fingernails.

I tried to scream but he choked me off. Then he loosened his grip enough for me to gasp with the pain. He started rolling my nipple between his fingers. Diary of My Guilt you should know that my nipples have always been very sensitive. Damien made me cum just by playing with them. Now Rick was doing it. He looked in my eyes as his fingers kept rolling my nipple and squeezing it between his fingernails, not like before but just enough so that I could feel a bit of pain. I understood.

I still struggled with his hand on my throat but I could talk. "Ok, ok," I gave up. I relaxed my hands at my side, letting him squeeze my breast. He kept paying a lot of attention to my nipple. I knew it was growing harder in his fingers.

"Ok, stop please," I tried to say. I don't think he knew my mouth was open and I panted because of the stimulation to my breast. I hope he thought it was that I just needed more air. He let enough pressure off my throat so I could say it again more clearly. Then I said, "What about if you just play with my breasts, kiss, lick them, suck, whatever, but no sex?"

He regarded my eyes, locked with his gaze for a few moments. His fondling of my breast continued. I think I licked my lips once. I hope he didn't see that.

"Get this top off," Rick said and took his hand from my throat. He only took his hand from my neck to also place it under my blouse. Now he hand one breast in each hand. He was still watching my eyes, our gazes locked together. With his hands on me I'm sure he felt my breathing deepen. Again, I hoped he thought it was just my lungs grabbing the air he had starved me of.

My hands were trembling as I undid the buttons in my V-neck blouse. I didn't want to be taking my blouse off. It might be strange but I would have felt much better if Rick did it.

After I had the buttons undone I leaned forward and pulled my blouse off over my head. Rick was still watching my eyes when the blouse was gone and dropped on the carpet. He was rubbing my breasts with the palms of his hands. The sensation was too much. I bit my lip trying not to let my tongue loll out. I wanted his mouth on my breasts the way Damien had done. Of their own volition my still trembling hands went behind my back to release the bra.

When the bra was loose, Rick removed his hands under it. He was twisting my nipples simultaneously now. I couldn't stand it. Rick must definitely have been able to see the affect he was having on my body. There could be no mistake I was still recovering my breath. My breasts were rising in his hands with the quivering breaths I was taking. I think my eyes were almost closed, the only thing keeping them open was Rick still with his stare fastened on my eyes. I shivered as I realised the desire I could see. My breasts, my whole body even, was goose bumped.

The pads fell from my breasts as I shrugged my bra down my arms. He let it fall to the floor. Finally, Rick's gaze moved from my eyes to my chest. Thankfully then I felt I was able to close my own eyes and concentrate on the pleasure. With him not looking at my eyes I didn't feel so slutty.

I think he said, "Yeahhh," just as his mouth closed on one turgid nipple. I came then and slumped. If Rick hadn't quickly moved his hands to my waist I would have slid down the wall to the floor where his coats were.

Rick gave me no time to recover. Straight away he was sucking hard on my nipples and trying to get as much of my breasts as he could into his mouth; I'm sure of it. "Get your jeans off, Jasmin. I'm going to fuck you senseless."

I managed to say, "No way." But I didn't resist when he pulled me against him and then with one hand was tugging my belt open. I wrapped my arms around him to hold myself up as he yanked the buttons open and then pushed my jeans over my hips. They were tight and pulled my panties half way down my thighs before my jeans just slipped down my legs. I pushed my sneakers off with my own feet.

Rick had one hand on my butt, pressing me against him as with the other he helped lift my legs free of my jeans. Every now and then he would move his mouth to a different breast. He was sucking so hard on them I was sure he would mark me. Even though I felt sore I also felt so much pleasure (and I suppose I also felt sexy) I just let him do it.

After my jeans were off my feet, Rick pulled my panties the rest of the way down and I stepped out of them also. He held them up to my nose. "These are so wet, Jasmin. Can you smell yourself?"

His head went back to my breasts as I glared at him. Rick threw my panties away somewhere and I didn't see them again later. I felt his fingers at my pussy then. One of them slid inside me and I knew how wet I was. I didn't want him to fuck me but I could hardly wait for him to do it. I lifted one leg up and wrapped it around his middle, opening myself so he could finger me more easily.

There was a part of me that didn't want to be doing this. And I would like to blame the port wine but I don't think it was that. I still can't really think clearly about it because it was only a few hours ago. I suppose the only thing I can say with any certainty is that I really knew that Rick meant to fuck me wether I was willing or not. He is much stronger than me and there was no one to help. Should I have tried to fight him? Maybe but there really was no opportunity. Once he had my breasts like that I suppose he really had me. I couldn't fight then, I was too turned on.

Rick lifted me with his two hands, one with fingers in my pussy and the other holding my butt. I wrapped my legs around his middle and then felt his dick head at my slit. I tried sinking onto him a couple of times but the angle was wrong. He just kept moving me around. I was moaning and he knew I wanted it but he wasn't helping much except to shift me around over him. In the end I took my hand, grasped his dick and lodged him in my pussy. It was the first time I really helped him get into me and I felt really slutty doing that. But I sank onto him anyway and it felt sooo good.

With me impaled on him, my legs wrapped tightly around him, Rick walked me out into his bedroom. It occurred to me that this was the third time I was having sex and I still hadn't been in a bed yet. It was a funny thing to think of at the time but that is what I thought. And I didn't want to be in a bed with him then either. So when Rick walked toward the bed I let my legs slide down him. A good thing to as the phone started ringing. Rick had an extension on the computer desk.

I said, "Let me down."

But Rick just grunted and holding me up with his hands behind my thighs, he changed direction for the computer desk. He sat me on the desk where the keyboard used to be and said, "Right, you answer it."

It was Ed. He laughed when he heard my voice. He asked me what I was doing and I said, "Nothing much." Rick had started moving in me and it was hard to concentrate. I just let him. When he understood his dad was on the phone, Rick took it from me. He stayed in me but stopped moving. One of his hands absently rubbed my breasts. That felt nice enough also.

He had a short conversation with his dad. Before he hung up he said, "Yes I'm giving her a good seeing to right now. (a pause) In about three hours, really? Ok see you around nine. (another pause) Ok, I'll try." Then he hung up.

I understood then that if it would be nine in three hours then it was six pm now. I looked at the digital clock next to me and it read, 18:05. I couldn't work out the difference straight away as Rick started moving in me again. I couldn't think about anything then.

I pushed the computer aside, which nearly pushed the monitor off the desk, but the desk was big enough that it didn't. Then I lay down as Rick started to get more forceful in me. He put both his hands on my breasts and was pulling and squeezing my nipples. It was too much and I came again. Then I tried squeezing with my pussy muscles to get him to cum.

Rick gushed inside me then. I could feel his sperm go in me. Exhausted he ended up supporting himself by leaning on his arms that were pushing heavily down on my pelvis. It was pretty uncomfortable being pushed into the desk like that. I'm sure he didn't care though. While we stayed like that I worked out the lie about the time. I knew I would never be home by seven pm. If it was after six already then Damien was already on his way.

As Rick pushed off of me I worked out what I could do. I took his phone and called Linda. She asked me if I was ready for my date with Damien. I didn't tell her I had sex with Rick but I asked her to do a couple of things for me. First to call Damien and tell him I was sick at her place. Then if she could say he could ring me back in five minutes at her place.

Linda teased me then about cheating on Damien. I wanted to tell her about Craig but I didn't. I admitted the cheating and said I would tell her all about at college on Monday. She wouldn't let it go at that though. Linda pushed me to know if Rick was better than Damien. "No," I said. "He isn't better."

"So why are you fucking around on Damien?" She laughed. "What are you thinking?"

I didn't have time for this. I didn't want Damien to drive so far that he wouldn't just go back home. "Linda, I'm not thinking. I guess I'm just being stupid."

"Hmmm," she said. "You sound like Gloria. She sleeps around on Justin all the time, you know? How does it make you feel cheating on Damien?"

"Like a slut. Yeah, it makes me feel slutty," I said. "I feel awful. Can you please ring Damien?"

Then Linda agreed she would put the call diversion on her phone to get it to ring at Rick's place. She asked me about Rick's dick then. Looking at his dick I saw he was getting hard again. I said to Linda that I would tell her the details later and asked her again if she could do what I asked. I was pretty distraught, actually. While I lay there I saw past Rick to the video camera. He was just looking down at my body, his eyes tracking between my chest and my pussy.

The video camera was still going and it was pointed at us. He must have turned it that way when he carried me past it. "Bastard," I called him. I asked Rick not to say anything when the phone rang. He said he wouldn't say anything and that surprised me. I thought I would have to bargain with something else for his silence.

I stood up from the desk and Rick went to the camera on the tripod. Looking through the viewer he moved the camera up and down, probably zoomed in on me. Like I didn't care anymore I turned around fully, displaying myself for the camera. He beckoned me closer with his finger curling back and forth. Curse me for a slut but I wanted that finger in me again.

I went closer to him, just enough so he could reach my pussy. I am ashamed to say I moaned when the finger went in me. I turned around for him and grabbed onto his computer chair. His other hand came around me and grabbed at my breasts. I felt his dick rub against me and then his hand pushed it in me.

What was I doing? I didn't care. The lust of the situation had gotten to me. Rick's hand reached around me and was teasing my clit. Then he was just pulling me against him.

I looked back and could see the smirk on his face, the camera recording everything just to the side. Then the phone rang. I never imagined I could make the effort but I managed to immediately move around the chair and Rick slipped out of me. I jumped to answer the phone and just before I picked up I felt Rick's hand on my back. Ah, so that was his plan. He wanted to keep messing with me while I talked with Damien.

"Bastard," I said. I suddenly had an idea. 'Ok, sit down Rick and I'll sit on your lap," I said. Rick sat in his computer chair. The phone had rung maybe four times by then. I ran over to the camera and hit the eject button. I had the tape in my hand when Rick caught me with his arms around my waste.

"This was the deal," I gasped, still very heated with lust but determined with what I was doing. "You got more than I bargained for, Rick."

He grabbed for my arms. He had a longer reach. I had one chance to throw the tape. Thank goodness I had played netball for years. I still couldn't believe when the tape went where I wanted it to go. I heard the clatter followed by the splash and I rejoiced. "Yesss!" That problem had been solved.