Kiss of the Succubus Ch. 04

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Totzman
Totzman
629 Followers

Kayla nodded. Grabbing her teddy bear, she climbed under the bed and stayed hidden.

"Don't come out. Not until I say," Grace repeated.

She walked to the door, and to her dismay, it did not have a chain latch. Holding her knee against the door, she unlocked the dead bolt and let the door open just wide enough to make eye contact with the woman on the other side.

"Hi," the woman said. "Are you the owner of the gray Chrysler out in the parking lot?"

"Yes," Grace said, squeezing the dagger behind her back.

"I'm so sorry, but I kind of hit your car while I was driving in. It was dark, and I was distracted, and it looks like your front fender is caved in."

Grace cursed silently, and the woman shrugged sheepishly.

"Listen, I can pay you for the damages. I can get my dad on the phone and he'll wire you however much you need."

"Let me- let me just see how bad the damage is," Grace said. She opened the motel door all the way and stepped outside. She took one step onto the balcony and had a gun pointed at her temple. Neil Corliss stared Grace straight in the eye and smiled.

"What's up, Harker?" he mocked her. "Hands up. Now."

Not even thinking, Grace raised both hands in the air, with the dagger in one.

"She's got a knife!" the young woman said.

"Drop it!" Neil said. Grace dropped the silver dagger onto the balcony. "Bethany, pick it up."

The woman picked up the dagger.

"Now get her purse." Bethany went into the room and Grace felt another stab of panic shoot though her chest. Bethany walked to the very edge of the bed. Kayla could see her feet, no doubt. Bethany grabbed Grace's purse from the nightstand.

"Look, just take what you want, I'm not a cop any more," Grace said, unsure if she meant that or not. Bethany hurried out of the room with Grace's purse in her hand.

"Keys in there?" Neil asked. Bethany fished them out. "All right, let's go. Harker, you're coming with us."

"I'm WHAT?" Feeling the situation run from bad to worse, Grace almost contemplated telling them about Kayla. She decided against it, not wanting to put her daughter in harm's way as well. Neil shoved the barrel of his pistol against Grace's back, and nudged her forward.

Bethany walked in front, while Grace followed with Neil's gun against her. Grace shivered in the night air, feeling a gust of wind rush up her nightgown and leave a wave of goosebumps on her thighs. They hurried down the steps and as they passed the main office, Grace noted with some optimism that the open sign was still on.

"Don't even think about it, Harker," Neil said. He walked Grace out into the parking lot and stopped when they reached Grace's car. It was, of course, undamaged. "Open the trunk."

Bethany rummaged through Grace's keys and slipped one into the trunk lock. The trunk popped open. It was mostly empty with the exception of a few boxes of Ted's belongings Grace had been meaning to donate.

"Now get in," Neil demanded.

Grace once again contemplated telling them about her daughter, back in the motel room, hiding under the bed. Her mouth went dry and she found herself unable to speak.

"He told you to get in the trunk, bitch," Bethany snapped. Neil aimed the barrel of his pistol between Grace's eyes.

"I'm getting in, I'm getting in!" Grace assured them, her voice wheezing with panic. She climbed into the trunk and lay on her side, bringing her knees to her chest. She pulled the hem of her nightgown forward, but it wasn't quite long enough to conceal her panties in this position. Neil leered at her and shut the trunk.

It was as if he'd shut a coffin lid closed on her. Panic gripped her, and the possibilities of what Neil had planned for her played through her mind. She heard Neil and Bethany climb into the car and start the ignition, and soon after, they drove out of the motel parking lot.

Oh Jesus, oh Jesus, she prayed to herself.

As they drove down the empty road, Grace agonized over what they could possibly want with her, and the only scenario she could imagine was that they wanted her dead. She tried to plot an escape, but was at a loss of ideas. The box in the trunk with her had nothing but clothes and baseball cards. Not even Ted's baseball bat; that she'd considered donating but thought better of it. As far as she could tell, she was defenseless.

They drove for what seemed like ten minutes, when she felt the car pull over to the side of the road, and heard the engine shut off. Grace waited.

She heard Neil and Bethany approach the trunk, and unlock it.

"Get out," he said as soon as he lifted the trunk open.

Grace climbed out of the trunk and saw he had stopped in the middle of nowhere. There was nothing but trees on both sides of the road, spanning as far as the eye could see in both directions. Realizing this, Grace was very, very afraid.

Neil put a cigarette in his mouth and lit it. He appeared neither happy nor upset; this seemed to be a routine situation for him. He was dressed in ripped dirty jeans and a black T-shirt. Stubble lined his face, hardened by years of living on the streets. Bethany looked to be a few years younger than Neil; pretty, and not the type she would have expected to fall into a life of robbery and murder.

"Into the woods. Let's go," Neil said.

"No, please!" Grace cried, hysterically. "I have a daughter! Her name's Kayla, she's four years old! She's back in the motel room right now, please don't kill me I'm all she's got!"

"Bullshit," Neil said. "There wasn't nobody back in that room."

"Yes, my daughter was there! She was hiding under the bed! Please, my husband died last week, don't kill her last parent!"

"Walk to the woods, bitch." Neil pointed his gun at her.

"She's got a daughter, Neil," Bethany said. Grace thanked God she might have a chance if Bethany took pity on her.

"No she don't. She's lying. Just like she was lying when she said she wasn't a cop."

"I'm not lying! For God's sake there's a car seat in the back! You can see for yourself!"

Neil eyed her carefully. He took two steps to his left and glanced into the back seat of the Chrysler.

"Shit," Neil said, and bit his lip.

"It's okay, Neil," Bethany said. "Let's just leave her here. We'll be gone by the time she gets back."

Neil shook his head.

"No, she seen our faces. She knows our names. We can't let the cops find out we did this."

"They already know!" Grace said. "My daughter knows how to call 911. She would have done it as soon as we left the room. You kill me, you WILL get caught, and it'll be life for you this time."

Neil lowered his gun. He knew Grace was probably bluffing. But he'd been outsmarted by her before.

"All right. I'll let you live."

"Thank you," Grace said, trying to stifle her tears.

"But first," Neil said, aiming his gun at her again. "You're gonna strip."

Grace looked at Neil, shocked.

"What?"

"You heard me. Take off that dress."

Trembling, Grace pulled her nightgown over her head, and Bethany took it from her. She folded it neatly and placed it in the trunk. Neil kept his gun on Grace as he waited for her to continue.

Grace carefully unclasped her bra and handed it to Bethany as well. She placed it in the trunk.

"Everything, Grace," Bethany said, eyeing the last article of clothing Grace had on her. Grace slid her panties to her ankles and handed them to Bethany, who tossed them into the trunk and shut it.

Grace stood naked, covering her breasts with one arm and her private area with her hand. Neil stared her up and down, smiling.

"Come on, Neil, let's get going!" Bethany said.

"Get in the car, bitch!" Neil snapped. Bethany sneered at him and got into the passenger seat. Neil took a step closer to Grace. "So, you wanna walk away from this alive?"

Grace nodded. Neil unzipped his pants and took out his penis.

"Get on your knees, and suck my cock."

Grace shut her eyes. She wasn't sure if she could endure another rape. But she would have to. If it meant keeping herself alive for Kayla. Sobbing, Grace walked towards him, and knelt down, cringing when she felt the hard gritty asphalt on her knees. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she leaned towards him and readied herself to take his disgusting member into her mouth.

"Ah, fuck it," Neil cursed, and slapped Grace across the head, knocking her to the ground. "I don't want a blow job from a bitch who's gonna cry."

In an unfathomable display of generosity, Neil dropped the motel room key onto the ground in front of her. He got into the driver's seat of the Chrysler, and started it up.

"Don't ever let me see you again," he barked back at her, and squealed the tires, flinging gravel into her face as he drove away in the direction he came.

Grace cried for several minutes, and shivered. Grabbing the key, she pulled herself to her feet, and stared down the dark, empty road. She had no money, no car, and no clothes. With no other choice before her, Grace walked down the deserted road back to the motel, naked and alone.

TO BE CONTINUED...

Totzman
Totzman
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4 Comments
Epiphany_JonesEpiphany_Jonesover 8 years ago
In my opinion:

You might have just submitted the story as a multipart story, and included all eight of your images in one "illustrated chapter". Or even waited until all the chapters had been completed and then submitted an illustrated novella. Anyway, it doesn't matter. You're the author, and you did what what you wanted to do. My opinion is just my opinion.

TotzmanTotzmanover 8 years agoAuthor

Maybe the illustrations weren't necessary, I just thought they might be a nice little bonus. I put a whole lot of time and effort into this story so I wanted it to be something special. I thought a picture or two for each segment would bring it to life a bit more.

TotzmanTotzmanover 8 years agoAuthor

It's a 6 part story and I had 8 illustrations so I made sure to have at least one picture for each chapter. Would more illustrations have been better? Sure, but I thought some would be better than none.

I mean, Stephen King's the Stand was over 1200 pages and it had something like 6 illustrations, so I thought my ratio was at least better than that.

Epiphany_JonesEpiphany_Jonesover 8 years ago
Just a question:

If your "illustrated story" has exactly "one" illustration in five pages of text, does that one illustration really move the needle? I mean, you include the image at the very end of all the text, so what did it actually do to affect what you wrote? Couldn't you have just as easily illuminated the "illustration" and just posted this as a story? I think it's safe to say that, more often than not, when readers take the time to enjoy an "illustrated story", it's the constant accompaniment of imagery that excites us. (I think I smell a gimmick.)

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