Little Things

"Nikki, you have to let go sometime, it'll tear you up, and if you keep it locked up, you'll eventually blow up," offered Sonya as she gazed at Nikki hoping she would look up.

"I'm really afraid this time, Sonya," said Nikki in a whisper as she looked out the window.

"Of what, his stiff penis?" asked Sonya as she looked at the side of Nikki's face.

"No ... Being with a man I could really let go with, then loosing him," offered Nikki as she picked up her coffee cup and looked at the table.

"Is that what it's all about ... loosing?" offered Sonya.

"It scares me more than any, well, you know what," responded Nikki as she finally looked into her sister's huge blue eyes.

"Nikki, look, you never dated until you met Juan then you married him, the first guy you dated, were you nuts? Your marriage lasted less than a year, your annulment was three years ago, you haven't had a date in three frigin years, you must be super nun by now." said Sonya as she raised her coffee cup to her lips.

Nikki had to giggle a little at Sonya's comment then she began talking about her sex life compared to a girl who would drop her panties for the Easter Bunny then Santa Clause and probably both at the same time if she got the opportunity.

As Sonya patiently listened and sipped her coffee, Nikki told her little sister she had become a closet sex fiend. She explained masturbation was all she did to release her tensions and with the help of her sex toys, she thought she could get by, but something happened at one of her client's office. She met David and she can't stop thinking about him. After she explained her dilemma she started analyzing her life.

Sonya couldn't stand watching her older sister struggle through her self-therapy, but Sonya began to understand more of the mindset of a woman in a little girl's body. Sonya felt she had to comfort Nikki and she thought she knew just how to do it.

"Nikki, stop it, look at me and listen ... Don't be afraid, your NOT ugly Nikki, shit, look at you, you're a baby doll, if I were a guy into little, I'd wouldn't have to think twice about it ... think about that," said Sonya in an attempt to assist Nikki's self-therapy.

Nikki couldn't believe the girl with the perfect female form sitting opposite her at the same table their diapers had been change on just said what she said. "Are you perverted?" asked Nikki as she placed her coffee cup on the paper towel.

"Moi? A pervert," quipped Sonya, "Some men are into little, it is what it is ... if I had said young ... that's perverted, you'll know if he's perverted, it may surprise you how easy it is to identify them, ok?"

Nikki looked up to the ceiling with her praying hands on the edge of the table and said reverently, "God ... please help my little sister, she's a pervert ... amen."

"At least I get it," Sonya quickly responded. "I want men to see me, not my body first ... Granted, it hasn't quite worked out that way for me, Nikki because I enjoy giving men pleasure more than society says I'm allowed to ... I'm trying to find Mr. Absolutely Flawless, in every conceivable way, that's all," added Sonya.

"I can't believe this conversation is actually happening," snapped Nikki, "God Sonya, you could get a social disease, or worse, die from it, or get beat up by a crazy kook and be deformed for life ... stop being a slut, I don't want to loose you."

"Sorry, I was just trying to help, geez," said Sonya in a hushed voice as she rose from her chair. Then Sonya leaned over the table taunting Nikki with her massive cleavage dangling under her chin. She placed her knuckles on the table and looked deep into Nikki's eyes. "Look, Nikki, there's nothing to be afraid of, find out if he's married if you need to, or just go out with the guy and don't worry about it, follow your heart, have some fun, kick up your heals, and if you're that attracted to him, suck the man's dick, you just might enjoy yourself and not be so uptight all the time," added Sonya as she flipped her long silky blonde hair away from her face and stood erect.

Nikki looked up at Sonya when she was standing and in a rushed voice said, "When are you going to start wearing clothes around here ... I am NOT uptight all the time, where are you going now?"

"See what I mean? Geez ... I'm going to the beach, I have a beach date, if you must know, he's a surfer, and gawd, what a body," said Sonya as she looked down at her big sister with a sorrowful gaze.

"I give up, you're beyond help," said Nikki softly as she wrapped her hands around her coffee cup as an emotional support.

"I'll be fine, he's very sweet, don't worry, I'm not going to do it, it's only our second date," said Sonya in an almost laughing voice.

"Oh fine, what, does it take two and one half dates to get into your panties?" said Nikki in a facetious tone.

"No, it takes two days to get his damn wetsuit off ... see ya later, I'm late, for a very important date," said Sonya as she rounded the table and stepped toward the kitchen sink to rinse her coffee cup while making noises like a rabbit with her lips and teeth.

Nikki sat drinking her coffee as she listened to Sonya in the background. After all the noise had settled down, Sonya emerged from her bedroom wearing an orange colored wrap over a skimpy sparkling orange two-piece swimsuit barely covering her body.

"Bye," said Sonya, then as soon as she closed the door, Nikki got up and ran toward the door, stood like a bulldog and yelled at the door, "I'm not up tight all the time, and I'm NOT sucking a married man's, then Nikki lowered her head and her voice to a near whisper, "penis."

After Sonya left, it took Nikki nearly an hour to calm down and ponder her despair. Her marriage fell apart because she refused to perform orally on a man with a horse penis, but somehow she felt she could do anything with David. She became more confused then decided to be alone and maybe experiment with her new toy after she finished her chores.

It usually took Nikki a couple of hours to care for her numerous houseplants and she decided to do laundry simultaneously and get everything done as soon as possible in case David called sooner then later and if he didn't call she'd at least have her pillow and her toys to play with.

Nikki changed into her work clothes without sneakers, panties or a bra, because they were easier to move around in. She turned the stereo on loud and began listening to her favorite music as she danced around the small apartment watering plants and doing laundry. An hour into her ordeal the phone started ringing. At first Nikki didn't hear the phone behind the loud music, but when she recognized the ringing was not part of the song on the stereo she stopped watering, turned the stereo off, picked up the handset and swirled toward another plant with the watering can in her hand.

"Yellow!" said Nikki cheerfully as she tipped her watering can into a pot containing a specimen dracaena.

"Nikki?" the deep voice in the small speaker asked.

"Yes?" she questioned as water poured outside the pot.

"It's David, can you talk?" said the voice.

There was a short pause as Nikki's heart began to beat harder. She wasn't sure why but she felt nervous. Suddenly she felt she had to speak and stop watering her foot, "OH, David, Hi, um, yes ... yes, I can talk ... how are you?"

"I'm good, how are you?" asked the voice in the tiny speaker.

"I'm ok," said Nikki as she felt she was talking on the phone to a soul mate far away.

"I was wondering, I know it's short notice, but I escaped work this weekend, would you like to have dinner tonight?" asked David in a calm comforting voice.

Nikki had to catch her breath as she set her watering can down on the wet carpet and pulled one of the breakfast chairs so she could sit down.

"Hello?" asked David.

"Sorry, I'm here," responded Nikki as her mind flashed with all she had to do to go out on a date in less time it took to reach orgasm.

"If you're busy, I understand," said David.

"No, no, it's not that, I ... I ... I yayyi," said Nikki in a decrescendo as she started to feel drunk with anticipation. Suddenly Nikki had to make a decision about what direction she wanted to go with David. Her mind rushed with ideas and oddly, she started to sweat.

"Um, if it's a girl thing, it's ok, really," said David in a soft voice.

Nikki's heart began to beat faster as she realized she had better make up her mind quick, She rationalized if she refused, David would probably not ask her our again, but if she accepted his offer, she'd have to rush to get ready, shower, definitely douche, shave her legs and pubic area, do her hair, do her nails, do her makeup, pick out something to wear, find some shoes, then without thinking, Nikki simply said, "I'd love to go out with you tonight David."

"Perfect," said David in an obviously excited voice.

"I guess we have to work out the technicalities now, huh?" asked Nikki in a restrained voice.

"Oh yes, the technicalities ... like?" asked David.

"Are we going to meet somewhere?" asked Nikki as she cringed her face in anticipation of a negative reaction from David.

"We can, if you feel more comfortable that way," said David in a calm voice.

Suddenly Nikki recalled she had little gas in her crippled car and she figured it would be better if they met at a restaurant within walking of her apartment. She began thinking of places nearby and decided none of them would make a good impression and besides if somebody who knew her saw her out with a married man it could get messy. She began to feel at a loss until David said, "Tell you what, I know were you live now, I'll pick you up there."

Nikki instantly went into panic mode. David had no way of knowing the house he followed her to when her car broke down was a stranger's house, and the house was too far to make it on the amount of gas she had in her broken car. In surrender, Nikki offered David an address where he could pick her up. The address happened to be the address of her humble duplex apartment.

"That's a different street, and a different number then the number I saw on your mailbox," said David curiously.

"It's my apartment," said Nikki in surrender as she felt she had steered the only guy she had any interest in, in the last three years, directly into a lie. Then a spark went off in her head; 'he remembered that address ... that's scary.'

"Oh ... no problem," said David cheerfully, "I can find it, what's a good time?"

Nikki started to shiver at the prospect of having David in her apartment. She began to sense she might not make it to a restaurant, but rather be taken advantage of by a kook who could be married. She had to be honest with herself, and give herself some reason to be honest. Nikki grimaced, squint her eyes then asked, "Are you married?" then she pressed the handset close to her ear and placed her hand on top of her head in anticipation of her head exploding in response to David's answer.

Without hesitation David said softly, "Divorced ... finally."

Nikki felt her whole world expand as if it had been filled with helium. She was so relieved she didn't know what to say except, "Sorry it didn't work out ... me too."

There was a short pause, then David asked, "Rough for you too, huh?"

Suddenly Nikki felt a little closer to David, probably because they had something in common, and she wanted to respond but she rarely talked about her marriage and she never talked about the breakup. Keeping her promise to be honest with herself, Nikki simply said, "It was actually an annulment ... I don't talk about it."

David was comfortable with Nikki's honest answer and said, "I understand," as he felt delighted they got their relationship issue out in the open. He also sensed it was the next step to getting closer to Nikki. David couldn't have known, Nikki's thoughts had advanced to a higher level in their relationship and her mind was racing with ideas about the next step in her new life with David. She needed to have David make the next move so she offered, "Well, now that the technicalities are out if the way."

Being a negotiator, and figuring Nikki was a private woman and a cleaver little fox, David offered Nikki a time bracket. Nikki thought for a moment then said confidently, "7:30 sounds good to me."

"7:30 it is, I'll see you then," said David, then Nikki heard, "Bye for now."

"Bye," said Nikki in a hushed voice.

As fast as David's voice appeared, it disappeared and Nikki sat dumbfounded holding the handset in her hand while staring into the distance. "What have I just done?" she asked the wall.

After his conversation with Nikki, David felt renewed. He set the handset in the cradle and bounced on his toes. He was about to have a date with a cute little woman with an outrageously gorgeous ass. He began wondering what to wear and what restaurant he would take the precious little women in hopes of making their first date memorable. He decided on a popular seaside place with a reputation for friendliness, frivolity, fine fare and wicked martinis. The establishment was pricey, but would be worth every penny if he could get Nikki's panties off afterward. David glanced at his watch and realized he had enough time to do some chores and he'd start getting ready around six, figuring there was enough time. Suddenly he realized he had no clue how much time it would take to drive to Nikki's apartment.

David ransacked his apartment looking for the street map he had stowed away when he moved in. When he found the folded map he unfolded it and spread the sheet out on the coffee table. Then he checked the address and followed the map's grid. When he found the street, he looked at the wall and said, "Shit, she lives in bum fuck Egypt." Suddenly he recalled never discussing where he was taking the only other person involved in the upcoming evening's activities. "I have to call her back and tell her where I'm taking her so she knows what to wear," said David to the wall.

David picked up the handset once again and pressed the auto redial button. As he waited patiently for Nikki to pick up, he began wondering if she would pick up. After numerous rings, David began to sense she wasn't going to pick up, so he pressed the end call button on the handset, set the device in the cradle and sat on the sofa contemplating what to do next. A few moments later the phone rang and David grabbed the handset nearly knocking it over. "Hello, this is David." He said in his professional voice.

"Hi, this is Nikki ... um ... did you just call?" asked the soft female voice in the speaker.

"Hi ... Yes ... I forgot to tell you where we're going," said David softly.

"OH, I forgot to ask," said the shy voice in the tiny speaker.

"The Paître et Mer, ever heard of it?" asked David.

"The old house on the beach ... next to the new hotel?" asked the sweet voice in the speaker.

"Yeah, yeah, that's it, ever been there?" asked David.

"Too expensive for my taste, but I hear they have huge lobster tails and thick cut filets, and they make killer martinis" said the tender voice.

"I thought it would be perfect, what do you think?" asked David enthusiastically.

"Sounds yummy, yeah," Responded the sweet voice.

"Good, it's settled, see you at 7:30," said David as he held the handset tighter to his ear.

"Ok, David ... see you then ... bye," said the tender voice in the speaker. Then there was a click and Nikki's voice disappeared as fast as it had appeared.

"Bye Nikki," said David to a dial tone.

Nikki sat in the chair contemplating her next move. She decided David was a pretty cool guy, and she could trust him. She knew the Paître et Mer was a very fine restaurant but she only had one dress and it was way too risqué to wear to such a nice establishment. She thought about borrowing Sonya's cute white dress, but Sonya was at least five sizes larger and the dress would need major altering, so that idea was cast aside. Then she looked at the wall clock and realized she might have time to buy a nice dress at the boutique down the street if she rushed, but she'd have to go to the bank and get cash she didn't have. In a few moments Nikki started pacing the floor without any direction or reasonable plan. Then as if Nikki had been slapped hard across the face, she got an idea.

"I'll invite him over ... I cook ... I'm a great cook, he'll be impressed, what am I saying ... what the hell am I doing?" asked Nikki as she paced the floor while talking to the walls.

Suddenly the door flung open and Sonya stepped into the apartment scaring Nikki half to death. "Hey, just came back to get a few things, I'm going ... oh never mind," said Sonya as she zoomed by Nikki.

Sonya dashed to her room then Nikki heard the sound of drawers and cloth being moved about and she knew what Sonya was up to.

"Jesus, Sonya, you scared the crap out of me ... Apparently there's no waves today, so you won't be back tonight, right?" asked Nikki in a loud voice.

Suddenly Sonya appeared carrying her small overnight bag, "Not till tomorrow afternoon, Mike has to work Sunday nights, the place is all yours, do everything I'd do while you got the chance ... see ya," said Sonya as she rushed out the door and slammed it behind her.

The sudden silence in the space was more then Nikki could handle. She had to get control of herself quick. She began contemplating whether to call David with her new plan or cancel on him. Nikki had no clue what to do next except lock the front door. She began thinking about her conversation with Sonya that morning about loss and she rationalized in order to lose something you have to find that something first and if it were lost afterward she'd have to find it again. Nikki stepped to the phone, picked up the handset and nervously pressed the sequence of David's phone number. Nikki was surprised when he picked up on the second ring.

"This is David." Nikki heard in the tiny speaker. There was a long pause then Nikki heard, "Hello?"

Nikki knew she had to say something but she wasn't sure what or how to say it, so she simply blurted out, "It's Nikki again ... hi ... Um, I have an idea, I think you're really going to like it."

"I'm game ... shoot." Nikki heard in the tiny speaker.

"Um, here goes." Said Nikki as she crossed her fingers and closed her eyes. "Why don't I cook for you, here, at my place," said Nikki in a nervous tone.

There was a short pause then Nikki heard, "Nikki, that's a splendid idea, I'd love to enjoy your cooking, what would you like me to bring? ... Fish, steak, wine, champagne, whiskey ... pot?"

Nikki began giggling while spinning on her toes. Her hair fanned outward and she mimed the word, yes. She knew right then she had made the right choice. After she calmed her heart and stopped swirling, she asked as she pulled her hair away from her face while sitting down in a chair. "Do you like pasta?"

"You make pasta, as in spaghetti?" asked David out of curiosity.

"I'm half Italian and half French, I make my own pasta, sauce, and meatballs, and my own bread," said Nikki as she realized she was slowly revealing more of herself to David.

"Well, I am impressed ... need any help?" asked David.

"Sure," said Nikki as she felt an excitement fill her she hadn't felt in a long time, "let's make it 6:30, you can bring the wine, your choice," said Nikki as she spun around and glanced at the wall clock.

"Nikki?" asked David in a tender voice.

"Yes David," responded Nikki.

"Thank you," said David softly.

"My pleasure, David," said Nikki with a hushed voice.

"Bye, Nikki," said David with a soft voice.

"Bye, David," said Nikki with a soft voice.

In an effort to control himself David pressed the end call button, tossed the handset on the sofa and leaped into the air giving an imaginary friend a high five, "Damn, she's easy, this is going to be an interesting evening ... I sure as shit hope I don't blow my load before I get my chance." Then David went to the kitchen, retrieved a small vessel from behind a stack of cans, set the vile on the table and said to himself, "A few lines of this happy dust and I can fuck forever."