Love or Something Like It

However, I didn't have that knowledge, and that's what led to the phone call. I tried to sound as cheerful as possible during the call, giving no hint of the physical and mental pain I'd endured. By the way that you answered the telephone you gave me the impression that you had been waiting for my call, that it was inevitable that I telephone you, that I had no other choice: and at that time that's exactly how I felt.

This time there was no meeting in the café, you asked me to come to you house and, feeling like a lamb being led to the slaughter, that's exactly what I did. You answered the door in your bathrobe, freshly showered and shaved. Not bothering to dress, you went through the formality of asking me if I wanted something to drink. As soon as I had given you a negative answer you held out your hand and, without speaking a word, led me into your bedroom. Your body language left nothing open for discussion; we both knew why I was there.

Dropping your bathrobe on the floor, you stood before me nude, your penis already half-hard. Turning on your best 'little dog lost' voice, your eyes almost had tears in them.

'This is the way that he's been for the last week. I've been waiting for your telephone, saving myself for you. My balls are so full that they ache...I really do need your help.'

I now know that what you said was nothing more than an outright lie, that you are incapable of going more than a couple of days without sexual relief of some kind, but then the words had the effect that you wanted them to have.

Feeling riddled with guilt at having masturbated myself several times while you were 'saving yourself for me', I sat on your bed and, taking your quickly hardening erection first in my hand and then in my mouth, I pumped my head just as you had taught me until he was fully hard, it's purple head fully out of it's foreskin and brushing the back of my throat.

Then, in a sudden, newfound boldness, I stopped myself even though you were going ecstatic at my actions.

'Undress me...' I said quietly, 'slowly. There are two of us here.'

A look of genuine surprise crossed your face to be replaced just as quickly by that impish smile of yours, your eyes dancing with happiness at the sudden realization that I was willing to play your game.

Doing exactly as I requested, you undressed me as sensually as you could, that is until you removed my briefs. Then, unable to control yourself, you again held them close to your nose and took a deep breath, your eyes closed. 'My god, your smell drives me crazy...'

Then I said something that I would have never dreamed of saying just a week before.

'Then why settle for second best? Go to the source, its freshly shaved, just as you like it.'

Acting like some brazen whore and enjoying it, I lay backwards onto your bed. I raised my legs as high as I could so that my vagina was wide open for you to smell and taste. You did both. It was as you started to gently lick my vaginal lips that the sudden realization dawned on me that you liked being told what to do...

Feeling like a woman possessed. I said 'Go down on me all over, especially my clitoris, but don't make me come, not like that.'

Suddenly, I had a clear picture in my mind of exactly what I wanted to do, but I wanted to see if you would pick up on it. You did...without realizing it; it was then that I became aware that I could control you without you knowing it, but the full realization of that was to come later.

I had just got into the flow of what you were doing by rolling my own nipples while you licked me when you suddenly stopped. Lying down beside me, you kissed me gently on the mouth and said 'Climb on top of me, I want you to give me a good, hard fuck.'

Shocked and excited by your language and the fact that you were asking me to do exactly what I wanted, I felt your erection leave a trace of wet over my thigh as I straddled you, your solid bar of muscle standing between the cheeks of my ass. Falling forward onto my hands, I wriggled backwards until I felt the head of your erection slide between my vaginal lips. Still frightened by being entered by something as big as you, I took my time lowering myself onto you, especially when I felt your head sliding past the place where my hymen had been just a week earlier. This time there was no pain this time, just a stretching sensation at being opened up to such a width.

My diary reminds me that I did not manage to take all of you, at least not straight away straight away; it took a good five minutes of me rocking my thighs backwards and forwards before I again felt your hairs brush my shaven lips and your full length was lodged deep inside me.

You were laid back with your hands underneath you head, your eyes closed and a broad smile on you face.

'Welcome home. Now, do you want to work or do you want me to take over?' You opened your eyes just wide enough to see me shake my head, and then closed them again, your expression changing from a smile to that of a cat about to be fed a bowl of cream.

It took you ages for you to come the first time that I rode you. I had already had two orgasms, each time my vaginal muscles holding you tighter and tighter, before I felt you get bigger and harder inside me. That was when you took over, pulling me forward onto my hands and ramming yourself as hard as you could inside me. And then I felt another orgasm building, this one more violent than the ones before. Then, just as I came with a loud scream and lost control of my body, I felt you twitching inside me, pumping you hot sperm into a place deep inside me that I didn't even know had existed until then.

I fell forward onto you, unable to support myself on my arms, my whole body trembling as wave after wave of muscle contractions rippled through me. My vaginal muscles were holding you deep inside me in a vice-like grip, making you incapable of moving. I remember the erotic pain as you latched your mouth on to my shoulder muscle and sucked hard, giving me a love bite that was to last for over a week. I tried to roll off you, but I was holding you so tight that you had no choice but to roll with me, the two of us finally finishing up lying on our sides facing one another, joined at the groin like Siamese twins.

When you did eventually to pull yourself out of me it was more painful for me than your going in. It took another fifteen minutes for the tremors to cease passing through my body, by which time I was covered by with a sheen of sweat and in need of a shower.

I should have known better that to allow you into a shower with me: that evening I learned. I had just started to soap my body when you opened the shower door and walked in.

'You said 'Close your eyes, and enjoy.'' Taking the soap from my hand, you turned it into a lesson in eroticism, you hands sliding over my body with the weight of feathers. By the time you got to my breasts my nipples were standing so hand that they were painful, but you soaped them anyway, slivers of fire shooting down to my groin.

It was as you turned me around to soap my back that I felt your hard erection brush against my thigh. You soaped my back and buttocks, paying special attention to my anus, gently prying it open with the end of your forefinger. On the one hand I wanted to protest, on the other the sensation was so erotic that I said nothing. Backing me into the flow of water, you rinsed of my body, special attention being paid to my groin. Then, with my back hard up against the shower wall, you put your hands under my arms and slid me up the wall as high as you could. 'Now, wrap your legs around my waist as hard as you can.'

I tried to do as you asked, and you then lowered me onto your erection. You came into me so deep that I remember begging you to stop, but my own weight was driving you deeper and deeper into me. Then, when I was finally sat on to root of your erection, and you started lifting me and then dropping me, each drop opening me up deeper and deeper inside. Then, suddenly, the pain of your erection was replaced by a deep ball of fire that, in seconds, engulfed the whole of my groin, and I was riding you.

Opening the shower door you carried me, still dripping wet, back into the bedroom and, the two of us acting as one, we dropped onto the bed. Using both you hands you opened my legs and slid out of me, and then flipped me over onto my stomach.

Hooking your hands around my waist, you pulled me up onto my knees. Pushing my head and chest down onto the bed so that my waist was high in the air, in one movement you sunk the whole of your length deep inside me. Then you stood there, doing nothing, while I felt you throbbing inside me.

I thought that I had already experienced every way a woman can climax: me on top, you on top and you taking me from behind, but I was wrong. Pulling out of me you dribbled juices all over my anus, then, after spreading it with your fingers and gently opening the hard muscle, you went down on me, the very tip of your tongue probing me, gently forcing my anus open. I was shocked by what you were doing, yet enjoying it at the same time as you slowly pried me open with your thumbs and stuck your tongue even deeper inside me.

'Lie down on the bed and relax, relax you ass so that I can come deeper into you.' I did as you asked, and then, substituting a rigid finger for your tongue, you slowly started to masturbate me.

I have since asked myself many times why I didn't stop you then, but to tell you the truth what you were doing to me had opened a floodgate of vaginal juices, which were soon dripping onto your bed-sheets. Obviously, my body liked what you were doing, even though it was against every religious and moral code I had been taught. Suddenly, I understood my you had paid such special attention to my anus in the shower...

You, too, had noticed how wet I was, using all of your fingers to scoop up as much of my vaginal juice as you could to spread over my anus. Then you dripped some more of your own juices on top of mine, and then went down on me again, and I remember that I groaned with pleasure as you did so.

'You...taste...so...good...' you stammered between licks. 'You have no idea how good that cocktail tastes!' Then to prove you point, you loaded a forefinger with the mixture and, leaning forward, wiped it over my lips. 'There! Taste that! Does that taste good, or what...?'

Gingerly wiping the tip of my tongue over my lips I could see what you meant, a mixture of erotic smell and tastes bombarding my senses and releasing more juices between my legs. I nodded my head in agreement. While you had been talking to me you had been lubricating the whole length of you erection with your own ample pre-cum, allowing some of it to fall on my already saturated buttocks and anus.

First it was one finger followed by slow masturbation, and then two, slowly stretching my sphincter muscle far wider than it had ever been before. Then you started masturbating me faster and faster, my anal muscles stretching more and more. I was just about to have an anal climax (something that I did not even know was possible), when you stopped, and slowly slid your two fingers out of me. It was then that the animal in you took over. Kneeling between my open thighs, you leaned forward spread my arms and pinned my hands to the bed.

Latching you mouth onto the opposite shoulder where you left me a savage love bite a short time earlier, you pried open my legs with your knees and then my anus with the throbbing head of you erection.

Two places on my body screamed out in protest at the pain they were suffering; my shoulder from the harder and harder sucking of your mouth, and my anus from being stretched open so wide I thought it was going to tear.

Breaking the vacuum suck of your mouth, you showered the whole of my neck area with kisses, your hot breath blowing on my neck as you whispered in my ear. 'Relax...relax...relax your buttocks, just leave it inside you while you get used to it, and then you'll see how good it feels...'

Even though the head of your erection was inside my anus, I could still feel it throbbing and lubricating me further. It was then that you started lashing both shoulder love bites with your tongue, waves of erotic pleasure breaking over my body. It was then that you started slowly sliding into me, the bulbous head of you erection stretching the whole length of my sphincter muscles almost to their tearing point to take its width.

I was just about on the verge of not being to take any more pain, my buttocks clamping involuntarily, that the head of you erection passed my sphincter muscle and was inside me. You rested there for a few minutes, the throbbing of your erection sending shudders through my whole groin area. I had just gotten used to you being where you were when you started sliding deeper and deeper inside me, and then my anus was stretched to a new limit by the thick root of you erection, your pubic hairs then brushing up against the tail of my spine.

'You are so tight! You have no idea how good that feels!'

The pleasure you were experiencing was obvious from your voice, a husky whisper. I could also feel the ripples of gratification rolling through your thighs at being so deep inside me. It was then that you released my hands and, sliding you hands under my armpits and then over my shoulders, you rammed yourself as hard as you could inside me.

Then, sliding yourself backwards until just your head remained inside me, you rammed yourself forward again. It was then that I remember I screamed at you that I was unable to take any more, but my protests went unheard. You started to ride me while I was lying down, but then, as you got more and more aroused, that wasn't enough. Roughly, you looped you hands around my waist, then rocking back onto your knees, you pulled me into the same position with you.

That first time that you thrust yourself into me in that position came as a shock. By kneeling, you had changed the direction of you erection inside my anus. Now it was more in line with my spinal column than in the direction of my womb as it had been previously, your head banging up against a spot deep inside me that sent shock waves of eroticism through my whole body, my roses and their nipples standing so hard that they were painful.

Another shock came after a few minutes of you riding me as I felt my first anal climax being triggered by you franticly rubbing that same spot with your ever-quickening thrusts. That first anal climax was different from anything I had experienced until then, the whole of my groin, vagina, anus and lower stomach muscles contracting so hard that I thought I was going to force you out of me, but instead held you even tighter inside me.

That tightening of my anal muscles brought you to climax, your penis grew even thicker and longer for a few more thrusts and then I felt your hot ejaculation explode inside me blanketing and dulling that sensitive spot that had given me so much pleasure. I collapsed on the bed, you on top of me, your still-hard, still-throbbing erection held firmly inside me, even though you had already spent yourself.

I was soon to learn that, depending how aroused you are, you do not loose your erection after climaxing, that you can go straight from one to another without even softening.

I think I must have fell asleep, because when I awoke I was alone on a bed that smell so strongly of sperm, arousal juice and pre-cum that the whole room smell like some cheap whore house (whatever that may smell like.).

While sitting on the bed to regain the use of all my limbs, I went through what had happened since I had arrived at you house, and was both pleased and disgusted with myself. Pleased that I had been able to satisfy you, and at the same time find out a lot about myself that I never knew before: disgusted with myself that I had let you dictate what was going to be done and how without even asking me. You had wished to use me as a cheap whore and I had complied with your wishes and acted like one.

I found you sat in your small kitchen smoking a cigarette, one vice I didn't know you had. I had stopped two months before, but suddenly I had a craving that I couldn't resist. Without asking, I took one from your packet and lit it.

'I didn't know you smoked!' you said, in a shocked voice. 'I quit just before I met you and then, when I saw that you didn't smoke I was glad that I did. Do you smoke?'

'I did', then looking at the cigarette in my hand, smiled and corrected myself. 'I mean, I do. I quit two months ago, but after what I've just been through this is just what I need!'

'I know what you mean', you said, smiling, your eyes burning into mine, 'I've always said that the best smoke is the one after sex. But the reason I am smoking now is because I have something to tell you. Tomorrow morning I am leaving on a course for two weeks, in London. I meant to tell you when you arrived, but we both...well, got carried away.'

My stomach suddenly knotted at the thought of not seeing you for two weeks.

'But...you'll be home on week-ends, right?'

You shook your head, and explained that it was a 'total absorption' course being run for potential managers by the parent American company of the investment bank where you worked. The company was preparing for listing on the American stock exchange and opening five more branches in the States, apart from expanding the head office in Denver. That was going to cause managerial vacancies here, hence the course.

'What...what is it that you do?' You have no idea how stupid I felt as I asked that question. I had been sleeping with a man for two weeks without even knowing what he did for a living! Then it suddenly dawned on me that you hadn't asked me, neither. A red light started to flash in my mind, but I chose not to see it...

'I work in the futures division of an American bank with a branch here in Birmingham. If I get through this course all right then my future is pretty well guaranteed. What about you, what do you do?'

By the tone of your voice I could tell that it was nothing strange for you to sleep with a woman without even asking her what she did for a living. It should have rung all the alarm bells in my head. Maybe it did, but I chose to ignore them.

'I work in the re-insurance department of a large insurance company. Nothing as exciting a your work, but it pays well.'

If there was a continuance of the conversation, I remember nothing of it. The next thing that I do remember was that I was on my knees on the kitchen floor going down on you.

You only allowed me to get you really hard before you picked me up, carried me into the bedroom and threw me on the bed. Taking my legs high over your shoulders, you started one of the most relentless, love-less self-centred sex sessions that we ever spent together.

Dripping wet, I came almost as soon as you came into me, but then you kept pounding into me, even when I started to dry out. Usually I like it when I'm not too wet, that way I can really feel you, but after I had had my fourth orgasm you were still going strong with no sign of climaxing, I started to worry, for I was getting drier by the second. Soon you started to chaff, and then I was in the middle of a multi-orgasm, my cries of shattering orgasm intermingling with the cries of pain that you were causing me by your relentless pull and thrust.

By the time that you did come, I had had experience of what it must be like to be raped, to be taken while still dry, to be forced open again and again by a person with no regard for the pain he was causing the other person. The only difference being that I consented to be treat in that way, to lie there and submit myself to your whims.

The following two weeks were a living hell for me. For the first four days I buried myself in my work, much to the surprise of my supervisor. That also gave my vagina, womb and anus time to heal, but until today I am not sure that you realized how much pain you caused me.