by portlanddrew
You wrote a pretty good story. It's a simple one. You show lots of promise as a writer. Ignore the previous commenter. While it's true the story is a simply written one, all writers start from a beginning, and if they choose, can (and will) improve over time. Hope you have more stories in you, and that you'll write them.
Good story and you will get better and better with time and learning as you write. Just wish I could write but then they would jump me for not going to school.* lol
Keep on and I will look for your next story.*
Thanks. JAG
too much of a downer. They could have lived a happy sharing life....
No need to kill off a loving happy person.