All Comments on 'Sweet Sue Ch. 01'

It's a pretty good beginning. Needs the next chapter before any real opinion can be expressed. Also, in the next chapter, make sure you don't have any missing words.

The story is okay. It has a good setup, but I think the author needs to work on his grammar. It's very difficult to follow a story that has mistakes and errors. It throws the reader out completely and kills whatever mood the author is attempting to convey. Perhaps proofreading would help.