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All Comments on 'The Den Ch. 01'

by TippingTheScales

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evolvingslowlyevolvingslowlyover 8 years ago
I liked it!

My only criticism would be to make each chapter longer and enrich the story with a little bit more detail. Lovely.

mel_pomenemel_pomeneover 8 years ago
I liked it too!

The guy reminded me of Moose Malloy in Farewell My Lovely!

A great first chapter -- a pity it was so short! By the time I'd got into it, it was over! Please bring us a longer Chapter 2 soon, and have five stars for a marvellous first effort.

TippingTheScalesTippingTheScalesover 8 years agoAuthor
Author here

I will agree after re reading it for nith time, it is a bit rushed. Tho I do have to say this is much longer than the first draft ;)

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The Den Ch. 02 Next Part
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