Breaking Taylor

"Say nothing. I know what's in your heart." He smiled as if he heard everything I had just thought. "I see it in your eyes. Someday. That's good enough for me." He never pressured me. I wanted to crawl into his arms and stay there forever. I was nervous though. Was I really so transparent? Could he read me that well?

"I have a couple of surprises for you." He stood up and gestured for me to come with him. I did. We went into his room. It was dark, wood paneled, very neat, and slightly intimidating. He showed me to a chair and urged me to sit down.

"Sit, please. My mother gave me something a long time ago. She said for me to give it to the woman who captured my heart. I could never give it to Sarah; things were more unstable with her. But you, it's different with you." He talked as he went to a jewelry armoire. He returned to me with a small, velvet burgundy box. He kneeled in front of me. I was afraid he was about to propose and started to protest.

"Phillip, we can't, not yet." I didn't sound very convincing. He was smiling at my surprise.

"Oh, no my love. This is not a proposal. I know we're not ready for that. Consider this a symbol of my promise to you." He opened the box and held it out to me. "Mother told me this ring would be a symbol of my love to the woman who truly stole my heart. She knew it would never go to Sarah. Take this and know that no matter how long it takes, I'll wait for you." He removed the ring from the box. I held out my left hand. He laughed. "No sweetheart. This ring is for your right hand." I made the switch and gave him my right hand. He slid the ring on the ring finger, it was a perfect fit. I admired the ring. His mother was a brilliant judge of fine jewelry. It was a rich yellow gold band with a slightly raised setting. The setting itself was not large, but very elegant. It had a deep red ruby in the center, surrounded by the most brilliant diamonds I had ever seen.

"I can't." I started to protest. "How do we know.." He stopped me.

"I know this. You've stolen my heart. It's yours and it always will be. The ring is for you. Look it's a perfect fit. Tell me that's not fate?" He insisted. I looked at the ring, then at him and smiled.

"I'll treasure it forever. Thank you." I accepted the ring. The tears in my eyes were tears of joy, of happiness. We hugged for a long time and he kissed me on the cheek. I wanted to capture this moment of happiness forever. I wanted to be this happy forever.

In a matter of hours everything would change. My life would forever be changed, and Phillip would be shot. We did not know the house had all ready been compromised. We did not know at that very moment they were watching us. All we knew is that we were happy. A feeling I would not feel again, ever if they had their way.

There was silence in the house. We sat for a long time letting this moment relish in our hearts. Phillip stood, helped me to my feet and embraced me. I placed my face against his chest and listened to his heart and breathing. His heart beat strongly. I knew it was beating for me. His breathing was almost urgent with need. A need I knew he would suppress until the time was right, until he knew I could handle it. For that I was grateful.

"It's getting late." He said as his lips pressed into my hair and kissed the top of my head. He was tall, much taller than me. But, I always felt that I was vertically challenged being just five foot three inches. "My other surprise, we leave tomorrow. The arrangements have been made. Our flight is at six am so we should leave early."

"Really? Could it finally be all right to go?" I held him even tighter. Not wanting this moment to end. Not wanting him to let me go, but knowing it had to happen.

"Yes. It's been long enough. We should be able to leave safely now. They've stopped searching around here for you." He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head. After a few more moments we released each other.

"I can hardly wait. I'd almost forgotten we had to leave." I sighed, hoping that wherever we went the happiness would go as well.

"It pleases me that you have become so secure here. I hope leaving here will give you the freedom you deserve." He was smiling and his eyes were glowing. "I think you'll love the place I've found. It's magnificent and very secure."

"Where are we going?" I inquired with the curiosity of a child.

"It will be a surprise. I've instructed the flight staff not to inform you of our destination. But please trust me, you will love it. I promise." He assured me.

"I trust you and I love surprises." I kissed his cheek and went down the hall. I went to what I now considered as my room. I shut the door and went into the grand bathroom. I was on cloud nine so to speak. I decided to run a bubble bath and soak for a while. I started the water, poured in the scented bubble soap and undressed. The water felt good, relaxing. I tied my hair up so it wouldn't get wet. At the moment the outside world did not exist. All that existed for me was this bath, the ring on my finger and my intense feelings. I never heard the door open. I didn't know that I was no longer alone in the room. I didn't know that Phillip was all ready held at gunpoint and we were both in danger.

I had chosen an almost sheer, white gown with its matching robe. Both were very lightweight but very pretty. I hoped to one day feel comfortable enough to wear the gown for Phillip, without the robe. When I got out of the bath, dried off I stood in front of the mirror wearing only those dreaded bracelets. I took no notice of them. I admired what I saw. The reflection in the mirror revealed a strong woman who looked like she could overcome anything. She glowed from the love she felt. Her figure was trim, too much so from the lost weight during her ordeal. Some more of Maria's cooking would fix that soon enough. I caressed lotion into my skin, applied the matching fragrant powder and fragrance. Maria had cut my long hair into something more manageable. It used to hang to my waist, now it fell a little past my shoulder blades in feathery layers with soft curls. It wasn't blond, but it wasn't brown either just somewhere in between. It had a golden shine to it and I brushed it until that shine glowed. There was plenty of make up on the vanity, but I chose not to wear any. I was beautiful without it. I felt ready to say good night to Phillip and look forward to another day.

In a matter of seconds the world ended as I knew it. I walked out of the bathroom still with my head in the clouds. I was daydreaming about all of the exotic places Phillip might have chosen to take me. I walked to the table to pour some ice water, that's when it happened. An arm came around my neck and crushed against my throat. I gasped for air, trying to comprehend what was happening. Instinctively I grabbed at the arm. I tried to scream but the grasp was too tight I barely had enough air to breathe.

"Hello Taylor." A voice said. A voice I had hoped never to hear again. David's voice. He was laughing at my feeble attempts of struggling. "Haven't you figured out by now that you can't get away from me?" His arm loosened up a bit. I gasped and caught my breath. I screamed as loud as I could. No one came running. I still struggled with David, trying to get loose. "No one is coming. But you'll be leaving." He said as he began to drag me to the door.

"NOOOOOOOO. Stop this David, let me go." Then I bit his arm hard. I brought the blood. He didn't scream but it was close. His grip loosened and I got free. I ran out of the room and down the hall to Phillip's room. I rushed inside to find Chris with a gun to Phillip's temple. Phillip had his hands in the air. He saw me and I thought he would cry.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't keep my promise. I didn't know." He began when Chris thrust the gun hard into his temple.

"Shut up." He said to Phillip, then to me, "Taylor, this can go one of two ways, your choice. Walk out of here with us and no one gets hurt. If you don't, well, I think you know." Chris said without emotion. Before I could speak David was there. I spun around to confront him but his hand slapped my face hard enough to send me to the floor.

"Get up! It's time to go." He spat as he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the door. I saw Chris leading Phillip behind us. Out in the hall there were other men, all had guns. I could see it was useless to fight them and if I did Phillip might get hurt so I walked as I was told to do. David led me out of the house to a waiting car. He put us in the backseat then sat beside me. I looked at Phillip, he winked. I knew at that moment he had a plan, I prayed it would work. Chris drove down the driveway and back to his house. It seemed to take forever, but it was only about five miles. Phillip took my left hand and gave it a squeeze. I glanced at him hoping he knew what he was going to do.

As the car stopped, Phillip leaned over and whispered into my ear. "When you get out of the car run like hell." Was all he had the opportunity to say before David jerked me by the arm and slung me against the car. I took advantage of the moment and kicked him in the sack as hard as I could. Then I ran with everything I had. I am not sure how far I had gotten but I looked back just in time to see Phillip get shot. I couldn't stop, they would probably kill me too. I ran even faster into the woods. Phillip's last words to me as he was falling were, "Get to the gate" whatever that meant. I prayed someone would be there to make this situation nothing but a horrible nightmare. I could hear Chris screaming for me. I could hear David running towards me.

"Taylor!!!! Run Taylor!" David shouting, mockingly. "You will never get off this compound. You can't hide forever, I'll find you." He had slowed to a jog and Lucas had caught up with him, they were talking to one another. Probably planning on how to track me. I ran. I didn't stop until I was sure I had gotten far enough away from them to catch my breath. There was an embankment going down to a small creek. Everywhere I looked there were hills, trees, brush and undergrowth making any direction I chose a very difficult journey. How big was this compound? I recalled my first time out here, the terrain was different, but that was off the front of the house. This was behind the house. The hills seemed like impassable mountains. All I could think about was getting away from here. I began walking toward the creek thinking that if I followed it I may find a way out. There had to be a drainpipe to get the creek past any fence or security measures. If that pipe was large enough. IF. It was all I had and I clung to it for dear life. I prayed that Phillip was ok. I prayed he could find a way out too. I saw him get shot though. STOP. I couldn't think about that if I did I would start crying and they could hear that.

It was cold out here. I figured it was about seven or eight o clock. I had very little daylight left. I began thinking of how to weather the night in case I was still out here when night fell. I had on slippers, not shoes. My feet were not protected from the ground or the cold. My gown and robe were so thin the air was like ice against my skin. I had been observant as I ran. There were no cameras in this part of the property. At least that much was in my favor. My heart was pounding in my chest like it wanted to bust out and fly away. I walked on, following the creek. Every little noise sent me into a panic. Once, a rabbit hopping across my path nearly made me scream. I saw a deer a little while later. I kneeled down to avoid scaring it. I was afraid they would see it spooked and know where I was. I envied the deer. It was truly free and it looked like that was something I may never know. Lucky deer. Enjoy it before some hunter comes along and makes you a trophy on his wall I thought.

The sky was beginning to darken. I knew they would search for me all night. They would not stop. They would never stop until they found me. I had to find shelter for the night, someplace they could not find. I was still following they creek, but the terrain was getting rougher. The hills were becoming steeper and rockier, like I was in the foothills of a mountain range. It was also getting colder so I began jogging. I did not want to run hard enough to sweat, that would only make me colder. After about fifteen minutes of jogging I stopped at the foot of a hill. I looked up, it was very rocky. There was a small path following the rocks up the hill. I began following it. The brush grew thicker the higher I got, but I pushed through. About half way up I found a crevice, a cave almost. I ducked in just in time. I could hear footsteps not far off.

CHAPTER 7

I woke up shivering, remembering how cold it had been on that mountain. I had no idea what time it was, but I was wide awake. I sat up looking at the dress David had left for me. I worried about what the morning would bring. Would I be able to follow through with this? Would I ever get out of this room? Maybe, if I obeyed and what Chris said was true they would allow me to move into the upstairs. If I was to be, I could not even stand the thought of it, they would want me handy. It made sense to me anyway. I looked over to the computer, silently hoping it had come back to life. It was silent and black. I was truly alone in this hellhole. I recalled what Chris had said, almost a year. I had been here a year. How had that much time passed without me realizing it? How much longer would I be kept here? Was anyone out there still looking for me? After that long the only one I could be certain that would still try to help me was Phillip. Maybe I could get a journal, at least that way I could keep track of the days. I will ask for one tomorrow. Chris made sure I had plenty of books to read. He knew what I liked. When I had read all that he brought he would take those and bring more. I read a lot. I would dream that the hero in the book would save me from this place. It never happened but I never lost hope.

I couldn't concentrate on a book right now. I was too concerned about what David planned to put me through. He was evil, pure evil. It seemed like I had known him a long time ago but I couldn't place from where or when. Maybe one day I could but for now it escaped me. I've had that feeling a lot since I have been here. I should know him. He looks like a line backer, maybe he played football and I saw him play, who knows? Maybe I can ask him if he played football that might be where I knew him from. I do love the game. I've missed watching it since I've been here. It was my escape on the weekends. Saturday was college ball, all those young men playing their hearts out for their schools, some looking to go pro. Every Sunday the pro games, all the men who were drafted from college, high school, other teams, playing for the ultimate prize – the superbowl. How I would love to watch just one game. Maybe if I cooperate I can get David to let me watch. Maybe the computer can show me the games. It would be a nice escape for me, the only escape I can see anytime in the future.

It's funny how when you're locked away the things you think about and the things you miss. It has been over a year since I had something as simple and pleasurable as a milkshake. How long since I enjoyed a bowl of popcorn during the game? How long had it been since I had seen or spoken to my best friend? Would she still be my best friend if I ever got home? The holidays used to drive me insane, the shopping, cooking, parties, dinners and all the fuss. Now I wish I had just one moment of that craziness. I would never take it for granted again. Never. I was so selfish. I couldn't see it before, but I was. I see it now. A tear slid down my cheek as the reality of my former existence revealed the emptiness of the existence. I never stopped to wish someone a good day. I never stopped to smell the flowers the homeless lady in the park would sell. I longed to smell those flowers now. I hated going to the mailbox. It was always full of junkmail. Now I would love a piece of junkmail just to remind me that I'm alive. Am I really alive? Am I dead and in some sort of purgatory? Is this real or just some never-ending nightmare I can't seem to wake up from? Since you don't bleed or feel pain in dreams this has to be real. Why couldn't I just fall back to sleep and forget about all of this? Why did I have to reminisce? I didn't want more pain than I all ready had.

Until I was brought here my entire existence was superficial. In the mornings I had my coffee alone, wrote my articles alone, ate lunch alone. My best friend lived a thousand miles away and we spoke almost daily, but so much was missing in my life. I had my children, but as a mother I lacked depth. I was there for them. I love them dearly. But in many ways I was detached, distant, just existing instead of actually living. Now I existed in an endless nightmare. My days were basically the same. They would come in and do as they wished with me no matter how I protested. I couldn't stop them or even slow them down much. Every time the door opened I feared they were coming to hurt me again. Sometimes they didn't, but most of the time they did. Sometimes I feared that this is now the sum of my entire existence, that I should remain here as their captive for them to use as they desired.

What was this training? What did it mean to be a "love slave"? What would I have to endure? How long will this training take? Is David going to broadcast all of it live online? How many will watch me be tormented? Will Phillip be watching? With that thought I cried. I don't think I could bear the thought of him witnessing this "training". Would he still love me through all of this? He said he would come. Will that still be true when he sees what happens to me on a daily basis here? I prayed he would. What would I do without him out there trying to get me out of here? I could see no way of getting myself out of here. When Chris designed this room he certainly took every idea I could possibly have into consideration.

The room was beyond secure. The door opened out so the hinges were not accessible to me. There were no windows. The walls were sheetrock over concrete block and who knows what else. The floor was carpeted, but over concrete several inches thick probably. The ventilation openings were in the ceiling covered with iron grates of bars that were secured from the inside of the duct. Even if I could get to them there would be no way for me to kick them out. The only way out of this room was the door. It had at least two locks that I have heard. I know it could be unlocked manually or electronically. It was every bit of three inches thick. The room had to be sound proof too. I could hear nothing outside the door except the locks engaging or disengaging. There was an intercom that I was forbidden to use unless it was an emergency. I had used it once and was very quickly taught a lesson; needless to say I will not touch it unless I have to. The computer, the only bright spot in my dark little world, was only on when they permitted it. Sometimes I hated it. The creeps who watched the website would message me wanting to see me suffer more. I wished they couldn't message. But sometimes it was nice to actually hear human voices besides Chris and David. Sometimes, like now, I longed for some sort of contact. It's so lonely here.

I stood up and decided to brush my hair and make it pretty for the morning. Maybe if it was very pretty David would not hurt me. I hated it when he grabbed my hair and he knew it. That's why he does it; he thinks he has better control over me when he does it. That's why while I was at Phillip's I had Maria cut over ten inches off it. Less for David to enjoy. I missed it sometimes, but being shorter it was easier to care for. After brushing my hair about two hundred times I picked up a book and took it to the small couch in the room. I settled in to wait for morning and what would come next. I opened the book and immersed myself into the fantasy, forgetting for the moment where I was and what was to come.