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Click hereYou're a freak, Chris. All will be fine. Don't panic! I tried to ease myself and listened to her breathing.
I tried to believe my words. Indeed, I felt so happy with her. I was deeply in love with her. This might be my chance to become happy, to seize everything one could hope for. I would capture it and not let it slip!
But on the other hand, this all seemed to be too good to be true or everlasting.
Shut the fuck up, Chris!
I concentrated again on Sasha's constant breathing. Slowly in, slowly out. Same rhythm all the time like the measured ticking of a clock. It eased me and was mesmerizing. Slowly I slipped down out of consciousness into dreamland.
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This story will be continued soon. I thank you for your interest as you made it that far and I sincerely hope I was able to entertain you.
The second chapter is already on its way.
If you have some critics, suggestions or remarks I would appreciate any of your comments very much. Your vote is also very welcome.
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I am a hetero male who reads a lot. I found your description to be very romantic. I found the comments on word choice being odd a little strange. To be frank I didn't notice any strangeness.
What interested me the most (besides the sex) was the immediate emotional closeness. I believe that is something most males don't feel. Not that it won't or can't develop but the immediacy would be unusual in men. Do you find it so?
Already mentioned the only flaw I found so, I'll just say this is a wonderful story and I'm enjoying it immensely!
Up The Irons!!!!
I'm glad you liked it. I have had this bike indeed. And I really did put it apart and reassembled it piece by piece. I admit I share your passion and devotion for riding. In addition I love old things. They talk to me somehow and I adore the aura they wear. I always try to imagine what kind of stories they would tell, if they'd be able to talk.
I sincerely hope you'll soon find the one you will feel for with the same love, passion and devotion.
Have a mishap free bike season. Drive safe.
best regards
Pandorra
Le mans 1000, amazing classic. More into modern European bikes, Have an z1000. But many people cannot describe bikes they way you did.
I can tell you are a rider. The explanation on gears confirms.
Love on bikes is a whole different thing.
Sadly, it's the only thing I love. The bike.
Amazing story!
for your comments.
I did not know that romance is so strictly preserved for the hetero love alone. I will remind about that in the future.
In addition I will 'run to the hills' 'aces high' and do penance for the epic Eddy fail with my 'face in the sand'.
Thank you for the advice.
\m/
Hey so... Nice story so far. I think that some of the criticism is warranted as your word choices and idiom are odd enough to trip over. Might want to talk to your proof readers about any oddities they might find, but harsh complaints of tediousness are (as most internet commentaries) totally overwrought.
Also please excuse the hetrocentric whining. Romance is romance genders be damned. It would be fair to say that the action started a bit quick for a romance story. we hardly know these girls when it heats up.
Oh... and Priest doesn't have a mascot. Never confuse Eddie with anything other than Iron Maiden... Up the Irons!
It may be a good read for a few, but i would not put this series in Romance category. I wish Lit would monitor the categories as they used to.
Loved it!! The intimacy just melted me - about the best I've ever read. Hey, I'm an editor, too. Your content certainly didn't slow my experience to tedium or even cause concern with grammar issues. And that may happen if the story isn't taking me on an entertaining ride. Yours did. I'm so ready for Ch 2. Kudos!
Phenomenal story and very well written. I may not be a grammar expert, but this was great!