Lethal Weapon Pt. 02

"Was Amanda trying to make Trish jealous? It almost seems like she tried to push Trish into fucking Roger," Martin said outloud.

Then another thought occurred to him, "Was Amanda upset that Trish was with me? Did she want to push her out of the way, thinking I would go back to her?"

Years before, when Martin was messing around with Amanda, she had acted like she wanted something more serious with him, but he wasn't interested in that, because of her reputation of being a cum dump. He had fucked her four or five times, she was a good fuck, very enthusiastic and would do about anything, but she was definitely not wife material.

While we were drinking and talking about that stuff, Amanda kept checking her watch. All at once, she got up and went into the kitchen, telling me she'd be right back, there was something she needed to do. I heard the back door open and close, and I assumed that she had taken out the trash or something, then a few moments later, I heard it open and close again. She was in there for a little while longer, then she came out and went over to the counter that her TV was on and did something, then went back into the kitchen. She came out again and Roger was with her. They were both naked and Amanda had hold of his cock leading him into the living room, then they walked over and stopped right in front of me. She went to her knees and started sucking his cock.

I really, truly didn't want to see that. . . I was already hot and bothered from thinking about you, and this was making me more frustrated. I got up and went into the kitchen to get away from them. I had just sat down at the table, and while still naked, they came into the kitchen carrying our drinks and sat down at the table, said they were sorry that they made me feel so uncomfortable. I grabbed my drink and downed it, and told Amanda that her and Roger sitting there naked was really making me feel uncomfortable!! I got up and went back into the living room, hoping that they got the message and if they were going to fuck, they would stay in the kitchen.

I sat down on the couch and they stayed in the kitchen for a while, I assumed that they were fucking. Then they both came into the living room and sat down, Amanda on my left and Roger on my right. Amanda reached over and started rubbing my leg, I started to get up, but chugging that last drink had hit me pretty hard and I flopped back down. She moved her hand to my crotch and started rubbing my pussy. I froze, trying to fight the way I was feeling, and she moved her hand up and started to unbutton my pants. She asked me if I wanted Roger to lick my ass, and I felt that tingle go through my pussy again. She told me to relax and enjoy myself, they were going to make me come. Funny, now that I think about it, Roger never said a word, just did what she told him to do.

I'm ashamed to say that I stood up and stayed right there while Amanda pulled my pants down and turned me around, telling me to get onto my knees on the couch. It was like I was in a trance, I just did what she said. In my mind, I could hear my mother telling me that my body belonged to Roger. They pulled my pants the rest of the way off and Roger slid down onto his knees behind me and started to lick my ass. Amanda got up, came around the couch and pulled off my top and bra. . . I hardly noticed. After a while of this, I turned and pulled Roger down on the couch and mounted him.

I sat down and rubbed my pussy on his cock and had an orgasm almost right away, then I adjusted myself and eased his cock into my ass. You know how much I like that, and his size gave me sensations that I'd never felt before. The whole time I rode him, I was imagining that it was you, I really was. And I wanted to blame you for being at work when I was needing you so bad, I'm sorry, but my head was screwed up at the time and I was drinking. I know that's no excuse, but I never felt a single emotion, or any kind of love for him. I don't even know why I was doing it, I think I just used him Martin, he was just a big cock to get off on.

When he got ready, he pulled out of me and shot his cum all over my ass. The odd thing about Roger, when he comes he shoots an unbelievable amount of cum. Amanda licked up his cum off of my ass and proceeded to lick my pussy until I came again.

Roger walked me home again. . . and once more he tried to kiss me, and asked if he could fuck me again. He told me that he really liked doing it now that we both knew what we were doing. I told him NO, and that I didn't want to do this anymore, I was not leaving you and I was not getting back together with him. PERIOD! Martin, I never kissed him one single time in all of those years, I swear.

The next night, when you were off, I attacked you. I hope it was memorable for you, I sucked your cock and was wanting you to come in my mouth again, but decided that I wanted you to come in my ass instead. I wanted to ask you to lick my ass that night, and I panicked. First, the thought excited me, then the fears crept back into my mind that you would want to know where I got that idea. Then I worried that Roger had probably stretched me out a little and you would be able to tell. I climbed on and rode you cowgirl with you inside of my pussy instead. I rode until I had a huge orgasm, and I screamed. Just being with you made it feel so good, we were scared that we had woken Jeffery up, if you remember. I was in such a hurry to get you inside of me, that we didn't even take the time for you to put a condom on, and you came really hard up inside of me.

Martin smiled, yes he remembered that night, it was one of the last times that they had had wild sex before she came down with her urinary tract infection. It wasn't long after that night, that it seemed to dwindle down to the boring, straight missionary style sex from then on. Then he remembered that that was also the night she asked him about going to the midnight shift.

"She was setting things up, so that Roger could start coming over here, I think that she was jealous of the fact that he was fucking Amanda," he mumbled to himself.

I always believed that was the night I got pregnant with Nicholas. Roger never came inside of my pussy until after I was already pregnant. Martin, I honestly didn't know that our boys were his, I always believed that they were yours, that absolutely devastates me.

About that time, was when I asked you to transfer to midnights too. It was NOT so I could be with Roger, in fact I thought it was a way to stay away from him. I thought that if you were home in the evenings, I would be here with you and not over at Amanda's missing you. I always go to bed early anyway, so I would be asleep while you were at work. You have to believe me, it's the honest to God's truth.

Martin, you spoiled me and made me want sex all of the time, you remember how much we used to do it. When you started working evenings, that changed, and I was SO frustrated. After the night I thought YOU got me pregnant, I was so scared that you were going to figure me out. I felt so nasty, that I wanted to fuck all day long. I needed you to do dirty, nasty things to me and I couldn't express what I wanted for fear of you finding out what I had done. Roger didn't make me feel like that, YOU DID! You have to believe me!!

I had kept those feelings inside of me for so long. I don't know why, but with Roger I let those urges come out, not because I loved him, he was just a cock. I guess there was no embarrassment or guilt involved, at least not until morning when I realized what I had done. I didn't have to face him and worry that he might think I was fucking someone else, he knew that I was. . . YOU.

In a way, I kind of felt sorry for him, because he knew how much I loved you, and that I had never felt that way towards him when we were married. He knew I would never have those feelings for him, no matter what.

Martin knew how Trish was, her empathy for other people, that's why he loved her so. He was the same way, in fact that was how this had all come to light, trying to show someone he didn't really know all that well (Joshua) that he felt bad for him.

In the weeks before you started the night shift, I ended up being with Amanda and Roger two more times. I told them that I wouldn't be coming around anymore, because you would be home in the evenings now. It was right after that, I came down with that horrible urinary tract infection, so it was a few weeks before we could make love again. During that time, I was so scared that Roger had given me some kind of disease, I had a lot of time to think and was scared that you somehow knew about it. I was terrified that if we had sex, that I would let myself go and act in a way that would make you suspicious. THAT was the mental block that kept me from enjoying myself with you. I wanted to make it up to you so bad, I wanted to fuck your lights out, and if I hadn't had that infection, I would have. There wouldn't have been time for me to sit around thinking and talk myself out of it.

One day,when you were working one of your day shifts, my mother came over for a visit, she wanted to talk to me about Roger. Mother told me that she knew about the three other times I'd been with him, was happy that I had finally come to my senses, and when was I going to start the divorce proceedings against you? I told her that I was not divorcing you and I never wanted to see Roger again. She came back at me, saying that I was surely in love with him, because I wouldn't have had sex with him if I wasn't. Then I made her mad again (no, shocked would be a better word), when I told her that it wasn't love, it was lust, and that "Roger probably never told her that Amanda had been there having sex with us too, did he?"

Mother got real quiet, looked at me not knowing what to say. I was mad and decided to push the envelope a little further, I told her that, "Roger screwed Amanda good, and I had had my face in her pussy too, what do you think of that?" Mother stormed out of the door, but stuck her head back in for a moment to tell me, that if I didn't stop sleeping with you, and get back with my real husband (Roger), she would come to you with some video tapes that Roger had given her of the times we had been together and tell you all about what had been going on. I don't know if there were ever any tapes or not, but I remembered that Amanda had a video camera, because we used to mess around and make funny videos, so I knew it was possible.

Later, mother called me up to say that she understood about me doing that 'dirty thing' with Amanda. She said that after thinking about it for a while, she realized that God had used Amanda to get me back together with Roger where I belonged. She told me that if I would divorce you, I could get the house and her and my dad would make the payments until Roger got a better job. That way we would have our own place. . . I hung up on her. . . I was sooo mad.

Then, daddy died. That was another reason that I wasn't very interested in sex for a while. Mother practically blamed me for the loss of my father, she said that my dad always stood by my decision to marry you. She said that daddy's health was our weakest link and that we had to pay a penance for my actions. My feelings were, that if I did anything that was wrong, it was having sex with Roger, not being with you. But what she said also drove a thought into my head that scared me. . . Maybe it was the type of sex that I was having that had taken daddy. I know that's absolutely nuts, but when I was younger, I overheard my mom giving my older brother a lecture about how anything other than straight, man on top sex was absolutely wrong. If a girl did anything other than that, she was a harlot and for him to stay away from that type of girl or God would punish him. I still remembered that, and it also added to my mental block about sex.

It was about this time, that I found out I was pregnant with Nick, my mother was ecstatic, she was positive that I was carrying Roger's baby. It turns out she was right, but I honestly thought the baby was yours. I'm so sorry, Martin.

You went to the night shift, and my mother kept at me to divorce you and be with Roger, she said that since dad was gone we could live with her. I told her that I had a home with you and I wasn't leaving, she said that I would be with Roger again, she'd almost guarantee it. I told her that just in the six weeks or so that you had been working nights,I missed you so much that I had to drink that damn awful tasting herbal tea, just so I could get to sleep without you here, that's how much I loved you.

It was about two months after you went to nights, and we had just made love before you went to work. The whole time we were going at it, I was wanting to let loose and do so much more than what we did. I was starting to get frustrated again, I wanted to do nasty things with you, but my fears about you finding out kept me from acting out my fantasies.

I want you to know, It wasn't you or your performance, I knew that if I would let go with you, it would be the best loving of my life, because you always put me first and I love you so much. It was my fear of acting out and being discovered that stopped me.

The next night, before you left for work, I got interested in a movie on tv, so instead of going to bed right away, I stayed up to watch. I don't even remember what it was now. All I know, is that I was sexually frustrated and I was on the verge of rubbing myself, when I heard a knock at the front door. I thought maybe you had forgotten something and had to come back. When I opened the door, there stood Roger, he had a couple four packs of the wine coolers that he knew I liked in his hands.

He asked if he could come in and we could drink a few. I told him that I couldn't drink, because I was pregnant with your (you Martin) baby. I could see the hurt in his eyes after I told him about the baby, he looked down at my tummy, I was just starting to show by then. I felt a little bad for him, so I told him to come on in, it wouldn't hurt me to drink one or two with him. We sat on the couch and talked while having our drinks, he told me that he'd been going over to Amanda's a lot. I told him that I thought she had a boyfriend, to be careful he might get jealous. Then he said that he really missed me coming over to Amanda's apartment, he put his hand on my leg and said he would like to lick my ass again.

I almost choked on my drink and had to get up to go into the kitchen for a minute. When I came back into the living room, I told him that he would have to leave, I wasn't doing that again, but he'd already opened a second drink for me. He said he was sorry, if I would sit and drink just one more with him, he would leave, so I sat down and drank another wine cooler since he had already opened it.

The next thing I knew, he was picking me up and asking me where the bedroom was. It was like I was in a trance again, I just pointed in the direction of the bedroom and he carried me in, and laid me on the bed. He undressed me, spread me out and started licking my ass. The next thing I remember was sitting on the edge of the bed with his cock in my mouth. I sucked him until he shot his giant load into my mouth, and I swallowed every bit of it. I kept sucking on him until he was hard again, told him to lie back on the bed, and I mounted him. I'm not going to lie about it, I came and came and came, then he shot his second load up inside of my pussy. I could feel the warmth of his cum deep inside of me and it turned me into a wild woman again, I got him ready again, and he fucked me again, this time in the ass, depositing his third load in there.

Before he left, I told him that it was absolutely the last time. I decided that I was going to open up to you and have you start doing those nasty things to placate me. Mother called me again the next day, and she said, "Guess who I talked to this morning?" I honestly didn't know. Then she told me that it was Roger, he'd stopped by to tell her that he'd slept with me again. I was livid, I told her that it was not going to happen again and she laughed at me, told me that she was willing to make a wager that I was wrong, to remember, she had the tapes.Then it occurred to me, that it was probably HER idea for him to come over to begin with.

I looked forward to the next time me and you made love, so that I could let loose with you, I needed to so bad. What me and you did WAS lovemaking, it was tender, it was wonderful and I loved it. What Roger and I did was just fucking, nothing more, and I needed that. . . Terribly. I knew that if I asked, you would have done anything for me without hesitation, and I so wanted to have your tender loving mixed with the raw sex, but. . . when we made love again, I chickened out again. Something in the back of my mind kept telling me that you would know that I learned those things from someone else.

Actually, it was Amanda that put all of those dirty thoughts into my head, then she had Roger do them to me. I thought about telling you that she had told me about some of those things, then we could do them. But then, you would have known that I had been running with Amanda, and I didn't want that either.

About two weeks later, on your first night back for the week, Roger showed up with wine coolers again after you'd left. I told him NO, I wasn't doing this again. He just said that we could just have a drink or two, he promised that he wouldn't try to fuck me, so I let him come in. Then after we'd had a drink. . . he asked me if he could lick my ass again. . . I won't go into detail, but once more I couldn't resist him, and ended up with his cum deep inside of me again. He came back the next night, and the next, and so it started. I couldn't resist him, I'm not going to lie to you. . . was his big cock a drug that I had to have? I don't know. There was also the fact that I was so scared that if I denied him, someone (mother) would tell you about us, or show you the tapes that she supposedly had.

Later on, when I talked to my mom, I told her that I was staying with you, but had convinced you that I had female trouble and we couldn't have sex anymore. I thought that was the only way I could get her off of my back, she seemed to accept that as being OK. I couldn't understand then, and still don't know now why I couldn't resist him. I convinced myself that he was just a cock that I used to get my jollies on. I fell into a routine and accepted the fact you were my love and my life, Roger was nothing more than a body that I masturbated with when you weren't here. I'm not blaming you, but if you would have been a little forceful with me, I would have been your whore, I would have done anything you asked. There were so many times when I was with him that I imagined it was you. Sounds crazy doesn't it, but it''s the honest to God's truth. I couldn't let you see the sex crazed little slut that I had become, and I never could understand why I couldn't resist him.

You asked me if I would have still been messing with him, since you're home all the time now? My mother has no problem with us now that Roger is dead, but it doesn't matter anyway, cause you know the truth now. For the last ten years or so, he was only coming around about once a month anyway, so he wasn't getting me more than you, and NO, even if he was still alive, I would not still be sleeping with him.

Hasn't our sex life been better since he's been gone? Take me to bed, Martin. Make me your whore, if you want to bring in other girls and have threesomes with her and me, I'll go along with it. Or if you stay and never want to touch me again, I can live with that too, it'll be OK, I'll understand. But I don't want that, I need you. Just stay!

I take full responsibility for all that has happened, I should have never gotten involved with Amanda, I knew she was trouble. My reluctance to stand up to my mother, or to tell, or show you what I needed, what my body craved has cost me the most important thing in my life. I now fantasize about how things would have been if we had gotten together in high school. I truly wish that I would have never met Roger, the ONLY good that ever came from him is Jeff.