Lisa Ch. 03: Learning

Riley felt anger rising. Damn Jimmy, he was always sticking up for Jessica, always looking like the good guy! Funny how he never seemed to be at the receiving end of one of Jessica's escape attempts. If he were, maybe he wouldn't be so quick to defend her!

"That's cute Jessica." Riley said. "Maybe you'd like to hold Angus' hand while you go back to the house. I think you've had enough freedom for today."

Jessica dropped Jim's hand, but not before Angus saw her holding it. He didn't know what to feel first, angry or jealous. He let go of her arm and held out his hand, mentally daring her not to take it. Jessica reached out and wrapped her fingers around his pinky.

"Hand, Jessica," Angus said in his gruff tone, "if he'd wanted you to hold my little finger, he would have said so. Take my hand!"

"Angus," Riley interrupted, "remember what we talked about this morning."

"Right," Angus replied and thought it was funny that Riley would want him to go easy on Jessica. By the expression on his face, Angus could tell Riley wanted to have a private moment or two with her also. "My hand Jessica!" He said, trying to soften his voice. Jessica took his hand in hers. 'Well, what do you know?' he thought to himself. She'd obeyed without the application of brute force or bloodshed. Angus felt his blood pressure coming down. He led the way to the house.

As they walked Jessica realized that for the first time that she could ever recall, Angus was actually walking with her, not dragging her. And somehow, she had not been beaten, as she most assuredly would have been any other time. Her mind raced. What had changed?

She knew there was still a good chance Angus would beat her once they got to the house, but out of the corner of her eye she could see the way he was walking. His free hand hung loose at his side, his steps were regular, not driven into the ground. His torso was upright, not leaning in the direction that they were going. This was not his angry stance, there were none of the usual tell-tale signs she recognized just before he dragged her to his room, threw her on the bed and used his belt to administer what he considered to be 'little reminders'.

Even Riley had been surreally calm. Riley had said he wanted eye contact, verbal responses, and kisses. Was that all it would take to make them happy? To get them to leave her alone? She would try, she'd have to try, to do what Riley had said. For the first time since coming to this God forsaken place, she had been happy, excited, free. She wanted it again.

"Sit down," Angus said when they'd entered the house and stood before the sofa. His voice had been gruff, but not angry. She forced her eyes to meet his.

"Okay," she replied, intending to say it clearly, but only managing a whisper, and sat down.

Angus stood over Jessica, looking down at her bent head. He couldn't help but feel as though she were planning something, yet, she'd looked at him, actually looked at him, and even said something that he hadn't had to pry out of her. He was confused.

Jessica pulled her legs up onto the sofa, wrapped her arms around them and began to rock.

Coddle was the word Riley had used, just like they'd done with Sam. Somehow Angus doubted that a pat on the head and a doggy treat would do it for Jessica. He sat down beside her.

She grew still for a moment, and then began rocking again.

Hesitantly he placed his arm around Jessica's shoulders. If she head butted him, bit him, jabbed him with her elbow, or stomped on his foot ... he was going to make her pay. He pulled Jessica to his chest, and she went with no resistance. He held her like that, moments passed before he began to relax. He became aware of the scent of her shampoo. He'd rested his chin on the top of her head. The fragrance was amazing. It intermingled with Jessica's own scent, and Angus began to feel a strange mix of emotions. Fantasy. Well, in his fantasy, he'd try and comfort her after having the fright of falling off a horse, and she'd show her appreciation by kissing him ... without him having to demand she do so. And not just a peck either, a real kiss.

Just how was he supposed to make her into his fantasy, as Riley had commanded? The only way he knew how, hadn't worked up till then. He thought about Jim. Jim coddled Jessica all the time, and seemed to get results. In his mind's eye he could see past situations in which Jim would lean in to Jessica and say "it's okay". Angus glanced at the front door. The others didn't seem to be coming. Christ, this was going to be the death of him! He took a deep breath and mumbled, "It's okay." Jessica didn't react. She certainly didn't kiss him. Oh well, he'd tried, he could tell Riley that.

As they sat there, Angus became aware of the soft mound of her left breast against him. His reaction was instantaneous. He wanted her, right then, right there, but when he brought his left hand to her breast, Jessica tensed. Warning bells went off in her head ... why had she gotten so close to him? She pressed her hand onto his chest as if prepared to use it to push herself away from him. Angus dropped his hand from her breast in frustration. This was not what his fantasy Jessica would do! He sat wondering what to do next, what Riley would consider acceptable given the circumstances, and suddenly Jessica relaxed against him again. Relief flooded over her, and her mind went back to replaying her ride on Ebony.

Angus got the message loud and clear, but he wasn't sure it was something he wanted to hear. This wasn't the time or place anyway, but he really wanted her. He wasn't used to letting Jessica dictate anything to him, particularly when, where, or how he could have her. He threw his head back against the sofa. Damn it, this didn't need to be so complicated.

*********************************************

As soon as Jessica was out of hearing range Riley grabbed Jimmy by the front of his shirt.

"Jim, you dumb bastard, get your head out of your ass and start being responsible will you! How could you have possibly thought that letting Jessica ride an untamed horse was a good idea?"

"Look, I'm sorry, alright? It all happened so fast ..." Jimmy was grasping at straws. He wanted to sound convincing, without sounding too inept. The last thing he wanted was for Riley to not trust him with her anymore.

"If she thought Russian Roulette was fun, would you let her play that too? Well?" he demanded when Jim didn't answer. Jimmy shook his head.

Jim, Riley was becoming more and more aware, was young and reckless, apparently something he shared in common with Jessica. Riley shook his head. It was like having a couple of kids! Despite himself, Riley liked the fact that Jessica had been so excited by something so dangerous. So long as it hadn't been part of her plot to escape, it actually impressed him.

"Finish up out here. I'm going to check up on Jessica and Angus, and get dinner started. Jesus Jim!" he exclaimed and headed for the house.

When Riley entered the house, he was expecting to find Jessica trembling on the sofa and Angus stalking around her. Or, even worse, hearing Angus beating her in his room. So he was taken aback, yet pleasantly surprised to find Jessica in Angus' embrace on the sofa.

Angus, with his head leaning against the back of the sofa, rolled it to the side and looked at him with an expression that Riley couldn't read. Riley took a deep breath. In his heart of hearts, Riley knew Jessica had been up to something. She always was. He had an overwhelming desire to get a confession out of her no matter what it took, but she had asked Jimmy's permission, which was definitely a deviation from her standard modus operandi. Plus, she hadn't had that angry attitude which almost always accompanied Jessica's escape attempts. He remembered that smile, it had seemed sincere. On top of that, he had to try and save his interrogations for her real misbehaviors. Angus would take any queue to come down on Jessica, so Riley had to be particularly careful about how he dealt with Jessica. He just didn't know if he had the restraint necessary in him.

"Is she okay?"

"Oh yeah, fine." Angus replied. Riley crossed the living room floor to get a dining room chair. He set it down in front of Jessica, and straddled it.

"Jessica," he said, "sit up and ..." he hadn't even finished his instructions when Jessica sat up, Angus' arm still around her, and looked at Riley. She waited, and Riley was at a loss for words. He looked at Jessica, studied her eyes, trying to figure out what her plan was. Jessica withstood Riley's examination for a moment or two, and then her eyes slid down to her hands. It was the same stare he always gave her just before he punished her for something. Not quite as intense, but the same stare. Did he know that Jimmy had lied? Was she going to be in trouble after all?

"Jessica, look at me," Riley tilted her chin up with his hand, "I need you to look at me. You know that. If you have nothing to hide from me Jessica, " Riley continued, a hint of suspicion entering in his tone, "you should be able to look me in the eye."

Jessica tried harder to comply. His voice was unusually gentle. She wanted to keep it that way, and she wanted to be allowed to ride Ebony again. She knew there was only one way that would happen. When she looked at him, she didn't see any anger, but she expected it to surface at any moment.

"What you did was stupid," he began. "You could have been seriously hurt. Don't do it again, understand?" Jessica nodded. A shadow crossed over Riley's face. Jessica sat straighter

"I ... I understand," she said quickly. She was catching on. Well, he could live with that.

For a moment Jessica looked like she'd say more, but then she closed her mouth and lowered her head. This was something new ...

"Did you care to add something to that?" he asked. Jessica nodded, almost imperceptibly. What was this? Were he and Jessica actually having an exchange? Some kind of two way conversation? He looked at Angus and he looked as stunned as Riley felt. "Well I suggest that you say something then ..." Riley said.

Jessica's lips moved, but nothing came out.

"There are two things wrong with this," Riley said wanting to grab and shake her. "First off, I need you to look at me, and secondly, I need to hear you. One more time Jessica, if you don't get it right this time, this 'conversation' is over."

Jessica looked up at Riley. "Can I still help Scott with the horses?"

Riley paused. Jessica had asked him a question that was unrelated to when she'd be allowed to go home. He couldn't recall a time when she'd done that in the past, ever.

"I don't see why not," Riley replied, not sure what to make of the change in her behavior. The eye contact, kisses, speaking loudly and clearly, even the eating were things that had been constant points of contention with Jessica. They'd been working on them for months.

Asking a question, while nice if done with no hidden agenda, was never required of her, and therefore a complete surprise. He truly didn't know how to react. "No saddle training though. Maybe, and I do mean maybe, if you improve your behavior significantly, we'll let you go for a horseback ride."

Jessica's breath caught and she sat straight up, her hands clamped over her mouth. She seemed barely able to contain her excitement. She looked at Riley with an expression he wished he could permanently etch onto her face.

"I'll be good!" she stated in a voice filled with excitement, "I will," she added turning to look at Angus and then back at Riley, "Can I ride Chestnut? I'd really like to ride Chestnut!"

Riley looked at Angus, but all he saw in Angus' expression was discomfort. He knew what Angus was thinking. It crossed his mind too. She was a fast study. What if she'd decided that the safest way to get away from them was to lull them into a false sense of security by acting and doing what they wanted?

"First you have to earn the privilege for riding, then we can discuss which horse you can ride. I need to see a consistent improvement for at least a month before we get to that point. You know what we expect from you, right?" Riley asked. Jessica was nodding,

"Eye contact, kisses, verbal responses." She answered. This was too weird. Riley began to wonder if he was dreaming.

"And what else?" he prompted.

"Eating," Jessica added after thinking for a moment.

"Right," Riley said, and looked back at Angus. This was by far the longest and most civil conversation he had ever had with Jessica. Angus looked like he was going to explode. His face had turned so red that it was difficult to see where his face stopped and his hair began.

"This is bullshit Riley!" he stammered. When Jessica looked at Angus, the optimism on her face fell, and she lowered her head. Angus resembled a tomato again, and that was never a good thing for Jessica.

"She's got something figured out. She's trying to trick us into trusting her. Once we're not expecting it, she'll stab us in our sleep or something. If she gets on a horse, she'll take off. I guarantee you, this is not for real, nothing she says is for real!"

Riley considered what Angus said. It was all very possibly true. But if they were careful, very careful, maybe they could get what they wanted from her, and stymie any escape plans she may have had. If they made her good behavior pay off for her, and came down extra hard on her bad behavior, sooner or later she'd have to realize how much easier it was to behave and not do anything to cause a reappraisal from them.

"Let me make something clear Jessica. If you do anything, anything at all, in an attempt to escape, you will lose all of your privileges, including being off of the rope. We go right back to square one, and be assured that Angus will be given free reign to punish you in any way he sees fit, followed by the rest of us. I think you have a pretty good recollection of what kind of punishment Angus can mete out ... right?"

Jessica nodded, and then remembering at the last moment, she looked up at Riley. She was pale and looked very chaste.

"Yes, I remember ..."

"Angus, I'd like to discuss this further at our meeting tonight, after dinner. I know exactly where you are coming from ... " he said while getting to his feet and lifting the chair. "Is that alright?"

Angus could only manage to nod.

Riley had to get away from Jessica for a bit. Things had gone too smoothly, too pleasantly. It couldn't possibly last for much longer, and he didn't want to experience the disappointment that would come with a disintegration in Jessica's obedience.

"In the meantime, stay on your toes Angus, that's all I can say."

Angus grunted in response and muttered "Yeah right," under his breath. Riley took the chair back to the dining room and Jessica never thought she'd actually be sorry to see Riley walk away.

She expected Angus to reprimand her at any moment, certain she had missed some cue from him that she had been expected to act upon.

Angus didn't trust himself to say or do anything more. Well at least if he had his hands on her, Jessica couldn't get away with much. It seemed like more coddling was the safest thing to do. He turned on the sofa and lay back against the armrest.

"Come here," he ordered, holding his arms out to Jessica. Jessica hesitated, her arms automatically wrapping around herself. Everything about him, his tone of voice, his body language, everything, told her that she was in trouble.

"Now, Jessica!" he ordered. Jessica moved closer to him. He pulled her on to himself, her cheek on his chest. She was rigid against him, but when Angus lay his arms around her waist, and kept them still, she relaxed slightly. For the first time in a long time, Angus didn't smell of oil and lubricant. It made it easier for Jessica to be closer to him. He could feel her heart pounding a mile a minute against him. Angus stared at the ceiling. He had to admit that this was pleasant. Far more pleasant than fighting with Jessica at every turn, still he couldn't help but wonder, what kind of a mistake they were making by letting their guards down?

Jessica lay very still. She had no idea why Riley and Angus were being so nice. Yes, Jimmy had taken the blame for her, but normally she didn't need to do anything wrong for Riley or Angus to find some reason to punish her. Why were they suddenly so nice? The only reason she could think of was that she was doing what they asked.

Angus moved his hands onto her back. Her immediate reaction was repulsion. She felt as though she should get as far away from him as she could. It would be so easy to hit Angus hard, on the Adam's Apple. He wouldn't be able to breathe, and she could get away from his constant touch. His hands were always on her somehow, she felt like he wanted to control everything about her. And he was mean. He was always finding ways to hurt her. Even at those awful times when she had to be alone with him at night, and do the things he wanted ... without fail he'd bite or pinch her. She felt anger rising, she felt like striking back, making him hurt too.

But the peacefulness of the moment made her pause. It was much easier to lie quietly than be Angus' punching bag. Besides, she had new, upcoming, freedoms, not to mention existing freedoms, that depended on her complying with the men. She really, really, wanted to be able to go horseback riding. Angus' hands had settled on her back. He made no attempt to touch her elsewhere. She could do this. What was so wrong with just quietly lying together? She forced herself to try and think about something positive about Angus. There had to be something that would make this more pleasant. Well, he was strong. She could definitely admire that about him. When he held her tightly like he was now, she had no reason to feel as though anything, other than Angus himself, could hurt her. She began to relax. She tried to control her breathing. Maybe if she lay still enough they could just lie like that for hours and she could avoid making a disastrous mistake. Maybe.

"How could you give Jessica permission to ride Ebony?" Scott demanded as they walked the horses back to the barn.

"Even for you, that's a little much!" Josh added.

"What do you mean, even for me?" Jim asked in indignation.. He knew what they were thinking, and resented it. They thought that since Jessica felt more comfortable with him, he was a push-over. They had no idea how hard he'd worked with Jessica. For years he had been cultivating a rapport with her. Trying to read her, trust her. Getting her to trust him. Much to his despair, he had been hoodwinked by her a few times. But in his defense he had never been in her immediate presence when she'd attacked the men, or tried to escape.

He'd like to think that had he been, he would have been able to read her intentions. He could not find anything in her recent behavior that would indicate something underhanded on her part.

He didn't dare tell them the truth about Jessica riding Ebony, or it would support that image. He still had some element of doubt as to what Jessica would do given half the chance to run. But this was different

"Jim, I know you don't want to admit it," Scott finally said hating the doubt that he felt, " but you know what Jessica is capable of ... there was a time when she'd do anything to get away from us. Maybe she just has more patience now. By asking you to let her ride Ebony, she may have been using you to get us to take her to the hospital."

"You're right," Jim said. The possibility, however slight, that there was something sinister behind Jessica's actions, shook him. Had she been up to something?

"Let's wrap this up," Jim said suddenly, eager to be near Jessica again and try to deduce if there was something to worry about.