Loved By a Satyr

Gondien was a month old when Faeron finally decided to speak to her about their brother. When he had come home after realizing what she had done, he had been so upset, that he had refused to even acknowledge that Thorontur had changed. According to Mr. Hughes, however, he had been taken back to Farwathain for their sisters to deal with. It had not been a kind reception, and Mr. Hughes had stated that Natasha should not return to Farwathain herself for the forseeable future. She didn't mind that in the slightest.

"I knew you were powerful, Natasha, but I never knew how powerful." Faeron said quietly, by way of starting the conversation she knew that they needed to have.

"I didn't know how powerful I was, either, hanar. Not until I needed it." She put a hand on the top of his, they were seated on her porch swing and Gondien was in his other arm sleeping.

"You are changed." He looked at her, at her hair, at her eyes that had never quite stopped their fluid movement.

Natasha bit the inside of her lip, "I am in the company of change, Faeron. You are holding a satyr child."

He looked down at his nephew with a frown, "It is a little difficult to ignore his paternity."

She chuckled and looked out at where Elarinya was showing Shi and Saerwen the bulbs they had planted to grow the next Spring.

"Taking away the abilities of a non-human, that could cause some trouble, Natasha. There are those who would be scared of you." He cautioned her.

Natasha sighed, nodding as she took her baby from her brother. "I know. It is not something that I did lightly, by any means. There was just no other way, he was so...evil."

Faeron looked out at his wife and sighed, "He was."

"I have complete control of my powers now, Faeron. There is no need to fear that I would use them inappropriately, or in anger...or at all. I just want to be a mother, live in my house, in my little corner of the world."

"That is what I want for you, as well, neth, but I will always feel like you deserve more." His words made her eyes widen and she looked over at him.

"More?"

"Your children deserve a father, a real father. Not one that sneaks in and out." He looked at her with a sad smile and she felt a tear slip from her eyes.

"Yes. They do."

"And you really are in love with that satyr." He pressed his lips into a firm line as he met her gaze.

Natasha bit her lip again and nodded, "Stupid, isn't it? To love someone despite knowing from the very start that his species do not love this way?"

"Love is never stupid." He shook his head and patted her on the knee.

"Oh, it can be." She said in a whisper.

"Natasha. You are so strong, maybe you need to take control of this." He suggested and she raised a brow at him.

"What do you mean?" She shook her head.

"You turned a satyr into a human."

"Temporarily." She muttered.

Faeron smiled, "You took the powers from an elf."

"I would never do that again." She frowned at him now.

"It seems to me like convincing a flock of satyrs to let one love you would be a pretty easy thing for you to manage." he shrugged his shoulders as he stood up.

Natasha glared at him, "I am not going to trick them."

"Natasha, I'm a wood elf. My kind has spent centuries doing horrible, vile things to humans and nonhumans. Thorontur would tell you that that is our nature. Well, if that is true, then nature is not always right. If the satyrs think it's 'natural' not to love one person, then they're wrong, too."

"You sound like a romantic, hanar." She sighed.

"Being in love does that to a person." His eyes were on Shi again and Natasha looked over at her, as well.

"It just doesn't feel like it's going to work."

"I think you still doubt yourself." He said in a long sigh as he looked down at her.

"Would you want someone to be with you because you MADE them be with you?"

He grinned, "I don't think you'd be making Ailen do anything."

Natasha frowned and felt Gondien start to fuss against her.

"Why did you choose to turn into a bird?" His question confused her and Natasha looked up at him.

"I didn't really focus on it, I just wanted to turn into a bird." She shrugged.

"Only one bird bursts into flame, neth, and it is a rare one at that." He told her, bringing an image of her to mind of the day she'd shown up at Vorhees as a bird.

"I don't know..." Natasha knew what she looked like, if she were to be asked to name the bird, it would have only one possible name. She was a half wood elf/half wizard. She certainly was not a phoenix.

"So between them love did shine, that the turtle saw his right flaming in the phœnix' sight; either was the other's mine." She knew the poem was Shakespeare, but she was surprised that her brother knew that.

"So now Ailen's a turtle?" She pinched one side of her mouth together and watched him grin at her.

"You know damn well it's not about a turtle." He chuckled and moved off of the back porch.

She watched him go, frowning as she brought Gondien to her breast to feed. He wasn't right about this. Putting some sort of spell over the satyrs was not the way to handle this. She needed to get over Ailen, but it was hard. She saw him frequently, his child was her child. There was no way to get away from it. Every time she felt like her heart healed a little, he would come around again and break it into pieces.

The rest of the day was spent with Vesper, who was now more than ready to give birth to her daughter. Judging by the baby's development, it wouldn't be much longer. It was shortly after dinner when she heard a knock on her front door and Natasha realized that Cynric and his flock brothers were all standing outside of her house. They had gotten in the routine of just walking inside, but they had stopped tonight. She frowned as she put down the plate that she had been washing and walked into the front hallway and pulled her front door open.

Cynric was closest to the door.

"Being a quaydquaydkirth means that Ailen will only ever breed you, and that you will only ever be bred by him." Cynric's words made her mouth fall open and she gaped at him. Of all the times not to read someone's mind because she felt intrusive. She had not expected him to say THAT.

"It is a...trial to a flock, especially when...when we thought there were so few satyrs." Cynric's voice was deep, disturbed, he was not comfortable with this conversation, but she knew he felt he had to say this. "It is seen as selfish."

"I do not want Ailen to go against his nature." She shook her head, refusing to look over at the man she was speaking about.

"It does not seem to be Ailen's nature not to love one woman." Colby said huskily, shifting on his hooves nervously.

"You would be okay with this?" Natasha's voice was whisper soft.

"She must understand what this means." Ailen's voice was dark, nervous.

"What does this mean?" Natasha asked when Cynric sighed and looked over at Ailen.

"May we come inside first, Natasha?"

She immediately nodded and let them inside. Gondien had been asleep in the bassinet that she'd placed in the living room, and Ailen immediately went over and picked up his son, holding him close to his chest as he kissed his little head.

"We met a satyr in Russia who has kept a quaydquaydkirth for many decades." Dwight said as he walked inside and stood near her couch.

"Antero?" She asked, and watched as several of the satyrs looked at each other.

"You met him?" Cynric asked.

She nodded, "Briefly. I knew he had a quaydquaydkirth, but I didn't ask, I knew it wasn't all right."

"We spoke with him about his woman, and how things work in his flock. We have never...we have never had a quaydquaydkirth within our flock." Cynric said very firmly.

"I will never force that on you." She told them, her eyes resting on Ailen's for a moment, and she knew the look in his was one of devotion...to her.

Natasha, it doesn't-it doesn't matter if you want to or not. It's happening." Birch brayed a little, and she furrowed a brow, sensing his frustration.

"Ailen wants you. And you-you return his feelings."

She nodded, she would never deny the truth to these men.

"For Antero, breeding is difficult, he must fight the others to keep them from his quaydquaydkirth during a frenzy. But...if you could use your power like you did before, to cause a frenzy when you were both alone...it would be safer..." Cynric explained to her.

Natasha hadn't been sure she could do such a thing again, but now, now she knew more about herself, she was pretty sure she would be able to make Ailen frenzy if she wanted.

"Antero must share her with the other males of his flock, at least monthly, in order to appease the flock." Payton shifted, knowing that Natasha may not want to hear that.

"You've all known me..."

Cynric nodded, "But we cannot let that fade."

"So in order to have Ailen, I must take all of you, as well."

"A dozen or so times a year..." Birch nodded.

"Each. But not together. We know that you can not handle such a thing." Dwight added.

"You are not telling her." Ailen brayed angrily, inadvertently making the baby in his arms fidget.

"Telling me what?" Natasha hadn't heard anything that she couldn't handle. There was very little she wouldn't do, very little she hadn't considered doing, to be able to love Ailen.

"We are the easy part of this equation." Cynric sighed, shaking his head as he looked at her.

Natasha raised her brows and shook her head, "Your females."

He nodded, stretching his back up a little, "The females of our flock will never accept you unless you prove to them that you are stronger."

"Stronger than them?" Natasha frowned at Cynric.

He brayed and nodded.

"You want me to fight your females?"

"Only our strongest will challenge you."

"You do realize that I'm a wizard, right?" She frowned, she could hurt these women.

"You cannot fight them as a wizard." Dwight shook his head.

"You have to fight them as one of them." Colby finally spoke up.

Natasha looked at the satyrs standing around her and frowned. "You're mad."

"You've done it before."

"Changing a satyr into a human. Not changing myself into a satyr." She frowned.

"Natasha. I want you." Ailen spoke in a low, impassioned voice that rumbled through her house and Natasha moved her eyes to his beautiful face and sighed slowly. She wanted him, too.

~*~*~*~

Natasha stood in her bedroom, looking at herself in the full-length mirror that she'd put on the inside of her closet door. Her breath was still not quite even, and she knew she was still shaky on her feet...er...hooves. She'd refused to change in front of any of the satyr males. Dwight had gone to fetch Shi and Faeron to watch her children while she went to the mountain, and Birch and Payton had gone to talk to Mr. Hughes and Vesper. Natasha had argued against bringing them, but she had to admit she wasn't sure how she would fair in a fight against a group of female satyrs, and she couldn't risk getting mortally wounded by them.

Looking at herself in the mirror, she wasn't exactly sure how she could ever leave this room and let anyone see her. She didn't have horns, but she knew female satyrs didn't have them. Her hair was still red, and now it grew down over her shoulder and covered the skin almost halfway down her back. Then it started again just at the curve of her bottom and low on her pelvis and then down to her black hooves. The unnatural red of her hair made her look unlike any of the other satyr females that she had seen, but she wasn't able to change it. If she were to be a satyr, this is what she would look like.

She practiced walking around her room. The knee and hock were different, and she had to work on getting her balance right. After a while, she finally sighed and looked at herself one last time. She had not worn clothes. It would be a sign to the other females that she was ashamed of herself, that she felt weaker to them. Cynric had insisted that she not try to dress as she usually did. It had been probably the most difficult part of deciding to do this. But she had told herself that she would do practically anything to have Ailen at this point. Her heart felt like it had been tugged down into her stomach and was slowly dissolving, burning her with each beat.

When she walked out of her room and down the hallway towards the front of her house, her eyes first found Dwight's, who looked at her in very apparent hunger as he moved his eyes up and down her form. But she'd already looked away, hearing many husky make brays as she found Ailen. He was standing near her kitchen island and his body was fairly shaking from the desire he had to go to her.

"We have no time for this, Ailen. We must get her to the mountain." Cynric's deep voice didn't sound unaffected by the sight of her, either, but he knew they had somewhere to be, she had something that she had to do.

"You look..." Ailen brayed gutturally as he moved slowly to stand at her side, "When this is done, when I can have you...I want to have you in this form. Just once."

"Once may not be enough." Natasha whispered passionately as he moved his mouth against the side of her neck.

"We must go." Cynric huffed, closing in on the two of them and putting a hand on Ailen's shoulder.

Natasha smiled tightly as the older satyr took control, they were all being taken up in this moment, and she knew he was right. She did have somewhere to be right now.

"Do they know I am coming?" She asked quietly as she watched Birch close her front door a few minutes later once they were all outside.

"No. We did not want them to be on the look out for you and attack you before you got up the mountain." Cynric shook his head.

"That was probably a good idea." Natasha nodded her head.

"You should probably run, it will help you get more accustomed to your legs." Cynric suggested as they started walking through the field towards the mountain.

Natasha nodded and watched as Colby began to do so, watching how he moved his legs. It looked graceful when he did it, but she knew when she began to try to run, it looked ridiculous and she fell several times. Ailen helped her up the third time she landed on her front on the ground.

"You can do this Natasha. I need you." He whispered huskily against her ear and hugged her close a moment before running off with his flock brothers.

Natasha took several deep breaths and closed her eyes for a moment as she stood alone. She could do this, she knew she could. Focusing, she bit her lower lip and opened her eyes, the mountains in the distance, the male satyrs running towards it, this is what she needed to do. Her son needed his father, her daughter needed one, as well. And Natasha, Natasha needed to be able to be with the man that she loved. Whether the stump caused it or not, she loved Ailen, and she would do anything, she would do all of this, for him.

When she tried to run again, her muscles and bones and joints finally seemed to figure it out and after a few hesitant strides, she was making her way, maybe not at a full run, but at the very least, a healthy jog, towards the mountain. Closer it came, and she knew the male satyrs would go up ahead of her. They would attract the attention of the females, as they always did. It would allow her to get to the flatter area at the top of the mountains where they lived without having to worry that they would knock her off of the more dangerous cliffs she had to climb.

The trek up the mountain was very rocky, but Natasha found that her hooves helped give her a strong hold, and after a while, she was climbing quite adeptly, not always taking the paths that had been made for their non-satyr counterparts. She felt good, winded, able to do these things as a satyr, something she had never imagined herself being. She reached the area where the wedding had been held, knowing that the living quarters of the satyrs were about a hundred yards to the west on the mountain. She took a few moments to steady herself, catch her breath, relax her muscles and consider what would happen when she walked among the satyr females in this form. She felt like an intruder, and knew they would see her as one, but she couldn't pretend that she was okay with her current situation anymore. She would be the intruder, and she would also succeed.

She brayed softly, feeling the sound roll out of her throat almost naturally, and pushed off and made her way towards where the other satyrs were. She could smell them, sense their presence on the mountain. Colby came into view first as she rounded into the central area, where the satyrs congregated together. Cynric had explained that this would be the place where they would attack her. And he had cautioned her repeatedly that they would attempt to push her to the north, where the mountain gave way to a sheer cliff.

The black satyr was standing with a group of female satyrs, two brown and one white one. The three of them all looked over at her, one with lust in his eyes and the three women quickly, and clearly surprised and annoyed by her presence. Looking around, she saw the other male satyrs shifting uneasily, their eyes on her as the women, twenty in total, looked at her with gazes that ranged from anger, hatred, confusion, and worry. The female satyrs were mostly tall, like she had grown, but she was a bit smaller than them. There was a female satyr child among them, near Cynric, and he had bent down and was telling her to go and play with the other satyr children. There was a tan female satyr beside him who was looking at her with daggers of hate in her brown eyes, and she had already brayed her unhappiness several times.

"What is this, Cynric?" The tan female asked, her anger clear in her voice as she faced the flock leader.

"This is my quaydquaydkirth." Ailen said loudly, roughly, as he stepped forward and looked around him at the female satyrs.

Their response was not one of quiet acceptance. There was anger, a lot of braying, and Natasha stood her ground as several of the female satyrs stomped slowly towards her.

"You get off of our mountain."

"You are not welcome here."

"Get out!"

"I will kill you." That was from the tan female again, the one that Cynric had told her was the strongest of the females, her name was Betha.

Natasha breathed slowly, needing to stay in control. These women could not see her fear, could not see her back down. She had to be aggressive, strong. Steeling herself, she moved forward, walking directly towards Betha, who stood with a satisfied smile on her face. Natasha figured out why because almost immediately, a white and a black satyr both rushed into her, knocking her down harshly on her stomach. Natasha pushed herself up quickly, the air was loud with the sounds of both the male and female satyrs now, and she knew Cynric and Dwight were holding Ailen back from coming to her, he could not assist her. She had to do this on her own. Clenching her fists, she pushed back at the black satyr female, knocking heads together until she'd practically pinned the female against the rock wall to the right. She could feel the others surrounding her and used her arms and hooves to punch and kick her way through, knowing she was receiving a great many blows, as well. Her shoulder hurt now, and she knew she was bleeding from her mouth, left cheek, and hip, but Natasha pushed on. She knew the females that she felled would step back. She would have to work up the flock order.

Some of the females, though, never had stepped forward. One, in particular, had caught her gaze a few times. This female was tiny, practically the size of a human, and she was light brown in color. Her dark brown eyes had watched the fight that Natasha had begun, but she had made no move to enter into it. Instead, she had chose to shrink back against the mountain, choosing, instead, to stay behind where Payton and Colby now stood. Molly. Colby had told her about the satyr. She was what he had called the "bottom" of the pack. They hadn't even successfully bred her yet, the male satyr had told her, she was timid, and young. In her twenties in human years. She'd been found as a child somewhere overseas, and Mr. Hughes had brought her to the spa. When her eyes met Natasha's she nodded at her. And that movement gave Natasha a second...or third?...wind, and she growled out an angry bray as she face the tan female at long last.