Only in a Dream Ch. 05

He licked up and down my cunt and teased my asshole with his tongue a little. He went for my clit, started sucking and licking. Then he slipped two fingers into my ass and started finger fucking me.

I rode his face until I had another strong orgasm. As Kurt was leaving, he thanked me and said that he'd been watching me for years and I didn't know how long he'd wanted to taste my ass and pussy. When he got ready to leave, I kissed him and told him that we'd be doing this again, I'd let him know when.

GOD I LOVE COCK SO MUCH!!

I can't get enough. I'm such a FUCKING WHORE!! After Kurt left, I laid in bed and thought about why my mom had been so upset about Kimberly sucking on Jack's cock. Maybe my mom was having a wild time with Jack, the same as I am with Matt. And now, Kurt too. Maybe she's just jealous of Kimberly. Is she married to her soul mate, but needs a bigger cock to have guilt free, filthy, dirty slut sex with? Just like me!!! Smile.

And just like me, she can't let her husband see that side of her, for fear that he will leave. God, I even thought about Todd that I used to work with about 10 years ago, My God he was SO hot!! I wonder how big his cock was?? Maybe I should have fucked him, he wa. . . Noooooo, that would have screwed up things with Brad, I wouldn't have him.

Brad!!! Why can't I be like this with Brad?? I want to so bad, but he would think I'm a whore, he would wonder if I had been with a bunch of guys before I met him. Or he would think that I was cheating on him. I would be damaged goods. But, God what have I been doing??

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"I almost wish Todd would have got her now, I wouldn't have to be be dealing with this shit, and Kurt, I. . . I knew I should have kept a closer eye on him." Brad thought.

"Why, why. . . Why did she do this?!!"

He felt rage building inside, as he looked back down at the book.

********

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I feel guilty but, I don't love Matt or Kurt. It's just sex.

AND GOOD SEX TOO!!!

Wednesday Aug 17, 1988. Off / Off.

I feel so bad. After Brad got off of work yesterday morning, he stayed up all day and evening just so he could spend some time (sex) with me. I was scared that he would be able to tell that I'd been with Matt because he's so big.

He was eating my pussy and he started working his way down to my ass. I stopped him and told him I still did't feel right down there. He smiled at me, I know he was just teasing around when he asked me if I would just suck on his cock then.

I told him that he knew I couldn't do that. He said that I did it that one time. I told him that he would think I was a whore if I did that. He told me that he would never think that. Then he said,

"You're not fucking anybody else are you?"

He sounded like he was just being sarcastic, but, my face turned red and I couldn't look at him. I quickly slid down and took the head of his cock into my mouth, then I slid his cock in all the way and started going up and down on it. I could feel Brad's heart race, I know he thought I was actually gonna do it. I feel terrible because it was not to be.

After about twenty seconds, I pulled up and told him I couldn't. I still wouldn't look at him, I couldn't. I was breathing so hard, I almost wasn't able to talk. I know he could see how turned on I was. I know I'll never forget the look he gave me.

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Like he could see right through me like he knew that I was doing that with someone else. Then, something that has never happened before, happened. He started going limp. I told him I was sorry. I felt so bad.

He just said it was alright and reached for his underwear. I looked at him and asked him what he was doing, I thought he wanted to. . . He cut me off and said he was too damn tired anyway, and he rolled over to go to sleep. What have I done?? I think I broke his spirit. I cried myself to sleep.

********

As Brad sat there in a state of shock, he now almost wished he'd never read the journal, or even found it at all.

Looking back, Brad remembered most of these things happening like it was yesterday. He almost remembered these conversations word for word. He remembered that, for a couple of months during those times, Kathy had all but cut him off from sex.

Telling him she was not feeling good, he had been worried sick, that she might have something seriously wrong with her. Well, it seems she did have something wrong. She had become an addict, she was addicted to Matt's cock.

His worst fears, his suspicions about Kathy and Matt were all true. And, that asshole Kurt was fucking her too. She was doing things with them that she would never do with him.

That hollow feeling came into his chest again, he had never felt this kind of emptiness in his life. It felt as if his soul was being ripped out.

"I guess I wasn't man enough for her, I knew I would never be able to hold on to a woman like her. All of these guys chasing after her all of the time. . . It was only a matter of time," he said to himself quietly, as the tears started to flow.

She had sucked their cocks and swallowed their cum. If she would have sucked his cock, letting him cum in her mouth, he never would have thought she was a whore. He knew, and could tell that she was truthful with him about how many guys she'd been with before they met.

"But now what?" he wondered.

Brad's head was spinning in turmoil, his mind was asking all sorts of questions.

"Why is she even still with me?"

"Have I just been here, because she new that I would take care of her, provide her a comfortable living?"

"If I wouldn't have had that good paying job, would she have found someone with more money to support her?"

"Did it continue after we moved up here, across town?"

"Has she continued to see Matt all of these years?

Was he driving up here to fuck her after I went to work? That son of a bitch was probably parked down the street, waiting for me to leave," Brad thought.

"If it HAD ended between them. Why? How could she give up that Beautiful big cock?"

"Just how many other guys has she fucked? Or sucked their cocks?"

Brad's mind then turned to Matt's wife, Cindy,

"Did she find out about Matt and Kathy, was that why they stopped?"

Brad remembered Cindy being quite flirty with him a couple of times.

"Was she actually hitting on me, or was it just in her nature to act that way?"

"Did she know about Matt and Kathy and didn't care? Were they swingers?"

In high school, Cindy was OK looking, but not really pretty. She had a nice, thin and shapely body tho. Her long, dark brown hair hung straight about three fourths of the way down her back and she wore thick, dorky looking black framed glasses.

After graduation, her features matured a little, she started wearing makeup and had styled her hair to make it a little wavy. She had traded those horrible thick glasses for some small, John Lennon style, wire frames. Twelve years after school was out, she wasn't as pretty as Kathy, but she was kind of cute by then.

Brad also remembered an incident with Cindy back around that same time too. She was in an accident or something.

"What was it?" he wondered.

Then it came to him. It had happened not long before he and Kathy had decided to move. Cindy worked as an aid in a nursing home and one night, she was helping bathe an elderly patient, who had been stricken with Alzheimer's.

He was a very large man and still very strong. He had an 'episode,' took a swing at Cindy, hitting her square in the jaw and nose. She was knocked out cold, her nose and jaw broken. She had to have several surgeries, had lost her sense of smell, and had blurred vision, among other things. She was off of work for at least a year.

"That's what happened," Brad thought, "I remember now."

After what had happened to Cindy came back to him, he remembered seeing Matt and Cindy at Walmart, about a year before. Cindy's face was still screwed up from the assault, although her face was aimed at his, her eyes were focused down at the floor.

As she started to speak to him, she had to raise her head to be able to look him in the eyes and her speech was slurred. That old man had really done a number on her, Brad really felt sorry for her.

He thought that Matt must really love her tho, because she was kind of funky looking now, and they were still together.

Then, Brad thought about paying Matt a visit and making his face match Cindy's. He also thought it funny now, that Matt had been small, about one hundred and forty pounds when they were neighbors, now he looked to be every bit of three hundred pounds.

"Wonder if Kathy wants to suck his cock now," Brad said out loud.

"But, what about Kurt?"

Then he remembered, Kurt sold his house and moved about ten miles away. And then remarried.

"I should still look him up," thought Brad.

Was there anybody else? He looked back down to read some more.

. .

********

After Kathy had started to give him a blowjob, and then stopped so suddenly, the rest of Brad's nights off (Aug 18, 19, 20) went by and he never even approached Kathy for sex at all. Aug 21 was a Sunday and Cindy was off.

Kathy was on her period Aug 22 through the 28th, so nobody got any. Even though she liked mostly anal sex, she wasn't messing around while she was 'on the rag,' that's just gross, were her words.

Aug 29, 30 she was still a little under the weather from her period. There was no sexual activity to speak of, so there was hardly anything written.

It was Aug, 31st before Kathy and Matt were able to get together again. It had been over two weeks, almost three, since she'd had Matt's cock, and she was lusting for it.

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Wednesday Aug 31, 1988. 5-Nights / 6-back tonight.

When Matt got here last night, I was standing outside of the door, naked. After we went in, Matt started to push the door shut, but I stopped him and told him to leave it open, I had an idea.

After Matt undressed, I put my hand around his cock and led him outside. Ha, ha ha, Matt protested and wanted to know what I was doing. I told him to just be quiet and enjoy.

I pushed him back against the side of the garage and got down on my knees, took his cock into my mouth and started sucking. Matt was freaking out and said somebody was going to see us. So. . . that's exactly what I was hoping for. I wanted Kurt to be at the window, watching me work this fantastic cock.

I pulled my mouth off of him, walked over to the fence, only about three feet from Kurt's bedroom window. I spit on my hand and rubbed on my asshole. Then, I turned around, leaned over and put my hands on the top rail of the fence. I told him to come over there and put his cock in my ass.

What a chicken shit,

"But, somebody is gonna see us."

I told him that maybe I want them to. He finally came over to me and pressed his cock against my pussy. He told me that he wanted to get his cock good and wet first, before he stuck it in my ass.

He worked his cock in and out a few times and I almost had an orgasm!! Smile. I haven't had his cock inside of me, or any sex at all for that matter, for almost 3 weeks now.

I'm glad that I've been writing this all down, it has kept me stay sane for the last couple of weeks. When I read it and play with myself!!! Ha ha. God, I never thought I would ever do that.

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Matt's cock has given me feelings I can't describe, I just want to come all of the time now!!

Back outside. . . Ha ha, Matt pulled his cock out of my pussy, moved it up and slid it back and forth between my ass cheeks. He put his cock head against my asshole and rubbed it around a little, then he pushed his cock in. I pushed back and worked up and down until his cock was buried inside.

Just as he got it in all the way in, a car went by. Matt was flipping out again, but I had been looking directly into Kurt's bedroom window, trying to see if he was watching. When the car passed, the light from the headlights was visible coming through the living room window, passing through the house and out of the bedroom window.

There he was, I saw his shadow when the car passed. That really turned me on, I started pushing back at Matt wildly and I had one hell of an orgasm.

I could tell that Matt was about to come, so I pushed him back, dropped to my knees and took his cock into my mouth and sucked hard. When he groaned, I pulled his cock out of my mouth, he shot his cum all over my face. Then I rubbed his cum all over with his cock.

I told Matt that we could go in then. I could tell that he was really relieved when he walked towards the door. I turned back facing Kurt's bedroom window, with cum dripping from my face and flipped him off.

When we were back inside, I told Matt to lie on the bed, then went down between his legs and took his cock into my mouth again. I asked him if he'd had his big beautiful cock inside of Cindy the last couple of weeks. I don't think he wanted to tell me, but he said yeah.

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I sucked on his cock a little bit, then asked him if she sucked on his cock like I did. He said, that she didn't do that. He said it in a voice so low, I almost didn't hear him.

I told him; that's right, she's not a dirty little slut like I am, is she? Then I asked him if maybe she had a different cock that she liked to suck on, did he ever think about that? Then I told him that I loved sucking his cock.

Matt never responded to my remark about Cindy sucking someone else. I sucked in and inched my way down until his cock was all the way into my throat. Matt put his hands on my head, guiding me up and down, he was fucking my face.

He shot another load of cum right down my throat and I never moved, and kept sucking and making humming noises. He started to go a little limp once , but he came back again.

I lubed up my ass with KY, then climbed up and straddled him, reverse cowgirl. I put his cock head against my ass, then I pushed down until his head popped in. I worked up and down until his cock was in a bit. Then I laid back onto his chest, lifted and spread my legs, pulled my legs to my chest and told him to put his arms around my legs to hold them.

I then slid down, impaling myself with his cock in my ass. I told him to hold onto my legs, work me up and down and to fuck my ass. Hard!! Matt started rocking me back and forth on his cock while he thrust upward.

God!!! I had another intense orgasm. I told him to keep going and soon, he was ready to come. I was about ready to have another orgasm and I told him to hold on a second, I was about there!! I came again just as Matt shot a load deep inside of me.

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The twitching of his cock and the warmth of Matt's cum shooting inside of me was intense!! After we were spent, I laid there with Matt's softening cock still inside of me for a long time. I was thinking again, how I just wanted to leave it in there forever.

Matt kind of freaked out again, he said, Oh shit, it was almost three o' clock, he had to get home and in bed, before Cindy got there!! Ha ha. I told him to call her up and tell her that his little slut was using her cock tonight, she could have it back in a couple of days.

Matt tried to push me off of him, so he could get dressed and leave, but I told him to wait just a minute!! I made him lay there while I moved up and down on his soft cock a few times, while I had another orgasm!! Matt got up, got dressed and left. I hope he beat Cindy home.

This morning when Brad got home from work at 10:30, I was still in bed asleep. Andy was sitting on the bed playing, beside me. Brad shook me and woke me up, asked me if there was something wrong with me, was I sick? After I was fully awake, looking at him, Brad quizzed me some more.

He said that a couple of weeks ago, I was sleeping like this. That I had told him last week that I wasn't feeling good, now when he came home at ten thirty I was asleep again. I just looked at him, hoping that he couldn't sense anything. I told him that I just couldn't get to sleep last night.

Brad came over and put his arms around me today, he said he only had one more night to work this week, was I planning on maybe loving him a little this week? I pulled away, I don't know what's wrong with me.

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I told him I didn't know and I turned away from him. I think he might be getting suspicious!!

New Natl Guard guy is bringing me some pants to fix on Monday. He's supposed to be here at 1:00. I do a lot of sewing now $$$$.

Thursday Sept 1, 1988. 6-Nights / Off.

Yesterday evening, after Brad went to bed, Matt and I took the kids to Hilltop Park again. We were sitting at our usual table talking and I told him that I was so horny for his cock that I felt like climbing on top of him right there on the picnic table, right then, out there in the open.

Matt just flickered his eyebrows up and down at me when I said that. When the sun started to set, we got up and headed for the woods to get the kids. When we walked inside, I could hear them and could tell they were a pretty good ways off, all the way down by the creek. I took Matt by the hand and led him off of the trail a ways.

I'm so fucking nasty, ha ha!! Smile.

I got down on my knees, reached up and unbuckled his belt. He asked me what on earth I was doing? I told him to shut up, I wanted to suck his cock. I quickly unsnapped his pants and pulled down his zipper, then pulled his pants down around his knees and took his cock into my mouth.

Matt was still soft, and I swallowed it in one big gulp, I started pumping his manhood with my mouth as I swirled my tongue around. He was becoming hard quickly and I put my hands on his ass and started pushing his cock down my throat, I thrust my face back and forth. I let his cock pop out of my mouth and I rubbed it all over my face.

I told him that I was his cum slut, I wanted his cum, to shoot his cum down my throat, and that I loved his cock. I pulled his cock back to my mouth and thrust my face back onto it so fast, that I gagged a little, spittle came up from my throat and ran out of my mouth.

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There I was, on my knees in the woods with his massive cock in my mouth and long strings of spit running down my face and dripping onto the ground.

GOD, I'M SUCH A FUCKING WHORE!!!!

Once I had him back down my throat, Matt grabbed the back of my head and started fucking my face, just as fast and hard as if he was fucking my pussy. GOD!! My cunt was soaked!!

I wished the kids weren't there, so that I could have fucked him right then and there. Matt shot a massive load in my mouth and down my throat. I told him I couldn't get enough of his cum, that I was a cum slut fucking whore!!

With cum running out of the corners of my mouth I walked towards the trail and the now dim light of the opening out of the woods, while Matt waited on the kids. I didn't hear him holler, so they must have been coming already. I was glad that they didn't come up there a little sooner.

As I walked towards the car, an older couple passed me on the way and smiled. I think the woman must have seen the cum all over my face, because when I turned and looked at her, she was looking back at me with shock on her face.

I got in the car and found a Kleenex in the glove box, then walked over to the drinking fountain. I got it wet and wiped off the spit and cum that was left on my face. I felt SO nasty!! By the time the kids and I got home, it was well after dark, so I fed the kids a snack, rushed to get them into bed and went in for a quick shower.