All Comments on 'Payback - Ten Fold and Then Some'

don't forget the IRS and taxing, TK U MLJ LV NV

Well done, overall. Only trouble is this: you kept changing names from Michelle to Melissa.

...how many women ALWAYS want a guy to forgive the wife and take her back, but when the guy cheats "Oh Boy! Look out because here comes the pain!" I like this ending. He was a royal ass, but he grew and learned from his horrid choices. This is the difference between being human and being an animal. The wife became a beast with no redeeming qualities.

I am surprised Michelle took him back, but one must figure that after what he went through he would never risk being of such low moral character a second time. That and he was honest with her in the end. The worst thing you can do is continue to lie because you "don't want to hurt them". That's such bullshit.

Made sense too!

I'd have guessed that she did love and miss her ex & simply wanted to see the child she never had??

Don't forget - "Sophia Continued"!! Needs a better ending

Paul

Yeah, the original chapters went overboard with the revenge and the characters seemed to do things for no other reason than the writer wanted to play with them, but they seemed to be pretty linear. Suddenly this new ending has every one of them doing things that have no relation to what had come before. A story that was a bore has become one that makes no sense and seems to defy it's own roots.

. . .needs to be finished. It is a two part story that was last posted on 4/11/07.

Interesting story about those who learn from their mistakes and those that do not. Boring as it may be for some, there are rules to follow if you want a fulfilled life as a human being. There are plenty of people that live twisted unfulfilled lives outside of the rules. When you meet them as older people, they are the weird, the crazy and the bitter. They are never attractive in anyway.

End up together and make it for the long haul? The stats don't support that. How did they ever trust each other? Lexi couldn't have been all that perfect before to have become so unhinged. The cancerous friend is another indicator. How long and involved was that original affair? How does Michelle go from jealous harridan at the office messing with Lexi to perfect lifemate? Neither woman's character flows. The husband is stock character, simple guy lead by his dick.

For better or worse, at least it is finished.

It's hard to recover from a story that sucks to begin with. Usually FTDS add-ons cry out to have an ending - this one doesn't.

Michelle became Melissa?

I didn't read the other story, but by what is said in this one, no need to finish it...The marrigae was destroyed a long time ago...When the wife didn't forgave him, the marriage was over! @karenE - When a story isn't written in one time, that's natural to something be there out of context...

His wife is taking on all comers to get even? I mean, come on. This isn't very believable at all.

??

Logical conclusion to the story. Psycho first wife becomes a man-hating prostitute. Husband ends up with an upgrade and realizes how fortunate he is. Well done.

this isnt even close to a satisfactory ending.. but then again Most of you endings lately have been fucking awful

It was just OK.

Nothing special, but thanks for the effort.

A typical story line for the Loving Wives Stories: the people hang out in bars, think that the consumption of large amounts of alcohol is the answer to a problem. eat in troughs like Denny's, and wind up hooking up with another wife who cheated with a married man but then doesn't do it again after marring him (yea right).

Your early stories were very entertaining but not much any more, but I will continue to read what you write!

This one doesn't feel all the way finished, to me. Ex-Wifey showing up at the softball game at the end could go several different ways. She could be there to make peace, maybe? Or, more likely from how she acted all throughout the original and this continuation, she could be plotting even more revenge. After all, seeing Hubby married with kids and happy with her archenemy might just push Ex-Wifey over the edge again. It's up to you, FTDS, but this one could use a resolution to that plot point, IMO.

Hubby kind of redeemed himself after what he did in the first tale, but he still wasn't very likeable. Ex-Wifey, on the other hand, was NEVER likeable. I know you had no control over what the original author wrote, but she should have just filed for Divorce at the beginning. Taking all of that into account, along with Best Friend Bitch egging her on, this tale was the only logical conclusion to the original. Just another case of how revenge fucks don't work.

5 Solid Stars. I hope you do write a resolution to Ex-Wifey showing up at Daughter's game, though.

Don't know what Anony Mous is bitchin' about. At least you finished what some dick wad quit on. Not too bad a finish. There's been a lot worse. Cheers!

What the he'll happened, FTDS ?? You did NOT end this story.

You wrote a decent 3* chapter. A bit shallow on the character's backstory, especially Michelle or Melissa.

You set it up for another chapter FTDS.

Looks like the writer had himself a " senior moment" lol. I understand completely.

Will someone out there finish this damn story!

AMerryMan

" I was still hurt that she'd never once tried to call, to apologize, to even discuss anything. Not even a letter or a message through her lawyer. " Without this, there is no story.

I can't quite give it a 5, cause as others here said, there seems to be more to be resolved, namely what is Lexi doing at the game? Want him back after twenty years? Willing to share with Michelle(not Melissa, never seen you make that mistake before_, like some stories do? Just there to stir up more crap? Some type of blackmail? What? I think FTDS needs to FTDS. It was a well written, nice plotline story though, unlike some say. It's just I believe you need to follow your own advice and finish it. Keep em coming though. Can't wait for Party of Five!

.

where I thought the original was headed.

a waste of time.

Fuck, you can't even get the name right! and you NEED to FINISHTHEDAMNSTORY! it's not finished, you left more unfinished than the original writer did.

So she turns tricks for a living , some life.no husband no children . Getting old with a bunch of tricks. He was a jerk letting his dick do his thinking. But her reaction was over the top , she just should have divorced him. He straighten out and she went down the tubes. A paid whore. So do we really need a part two.?? He has two kids and a family unless you give us her story there is no reason for a part 2!

Why the fuss

I have read a bunch of stories. I have read stories that were impossible to understand. FTDS may may have a few small issues. He does this for free. I understand what he writes. I read what he intends. I appreciate that he writes quickly. I like that he cranks out stories. I catch all the tiny errors. If he went back to find all the piddly errors I would have to wait another week or so for the next story. I smile sometimes when I can see that he must have rewritten a section 4 or 5 times before he got what he wanted. It's readable. He gets 5***** from me. I want him to write more. If you need to pick on small stuff maybe you should offer to edit.

Thanks for the stories.

...plus, i like that FTDS is NOT stuck in just one thought pattern.

It appears to me that he can be the worst BTB ...if called for... through to reconciliation. I am BTB, but I do appreciate his response to the situation that other authors leave their protagonists in.

Well done, and thanks for your continuing contributions. You are doing more than most... you are tying up loose ends (and yes, that's loose, not lose).

Your addition to the story makes it complete.Nice touch about the ball game at the end. Thanks.

Not easy to fix it.Lexi going off the deep end is not explained,and there is no resolution between lexi and him.Why does Lexi become a,whore? Why does she show up 20 years later out of the blue?Not up to ftds normal standards,it leaves too much out.

Went back and read the originals. Came back and read this.

Not a bad ending and it does wrap it up.

Bow and all.

Thx.

FTDS - ya done gud!

I'm curious to see if you can write a story, about Lexi, from her point of view after her divorce.

Great conclusion to a sad situation. Instead of revenge fuck she should have just divorced the prick. Revenge sex doesn't work and she went nuts. He moved on to a happy life and she became a whore like her friend.

He didn't deserve to a happy and she didn't deserve her lot in life. Although it works in this tale in real life this ends with all involved alone.

Five Stars.

I personally thought that FTDS only believed in total destruction. As usual one wonders what would happen if the shoe were on the other foot?

very well done. I wish there hadn't been so significant a shift away from the wife.

Keep track of your characters.

I don't understand why people think they are solving anything by going out and having revenge sex.

There is no doubt about that. I subcontracted for a woman for a woman named Lexi. One day my wife and I stopped by her house to pick up a paycheck. She is in her 50's, dressed in short shorts, and her top gaped open at the top showing her big bra-less boobs flopping around. Won't ever get the image of the nice, church-going lady out of my head, considering what she terminated me for. (Sorry, just had to get that off my chest! LOL)

You have different endings but this one served this story best. And it was probably the only reasonable solution. 5 stars as usual.

FTDS, The ending you provided is too practical. It can not be that way, cause love is accepting people can't get away from their past this much easily. And people tend to forgive their loved ones, no matter what they had done... Your other stories are good but this one got not that much potential end. Some questions remained like how the lost puppy of a husband became a man all of a sudden? And all!

P.S. Can you write an ending for devil's mistress?

Melissa, Michelle, Come on - you are a great writer, how did this slip by?????

He was a cheater too, just like the whore, Lexi. Neither deserved any kind of happiness in their lives. The only way this could have had a good ending, is if the two worthless scum were stuck with each other for the rest of their lives, hating each other.

Cheaters don't deserve any kind of happy ending!

there is always some kind of taxes involved. TK U MLJ LV NV

Is Melissa? Or did you mean Michelle? Pretty sloppy shit considering she supposed to be the love of your protagonist's life.

What is your problem with this story,it makes perfect sense, the only problem is forgetting Michelle's name and calling her Melissa!

And as another commenter said, it seems almost every LW story has a cheating wife who wants her husband to "just get past it", yet here we get the usual cheated-on wife response, Burn The Bastard!

I'm sick and tired of seeing the female win when she cheats. The fact she is still a whore makes it better. And to ask you feminist out there that read this I have two writers for ya "suck it!"

Or vice versa? At least you put an ending to it. But I was surprised when he didn't set Lexi up again in Chicago to get busted. And for that matter he let Maria get away scoot free. Not your typical ending for an FTDS story. Somehow this seemed a little off. I don't see Michelle/Melissa taking him back, let alone allowing him to move in with her before he had even started the divorce. Anywho - thanks for the story. Keep after it since god knows there are hundreds of unfinished stories out there.

That is a special diagnostic term used in the medical community -

But it fits well here - LOL

No idea why someone would run off the deep end that badly and that consistent;y while denying the reality so vehemently and not be essentially a fruitcake -

It made for very unrealistic and ultimately unsatisfying story since we have no frigging clue what or why in the end - for either of them really.

Hey, FTDS, you sure got a bunch of flak for inserting a wrong name. What the hell? They're not critics, they're arseluks. Good writing and tale. Enjoyed it. Lucked out with Michelle, didn't he? Cheers!

I almost feel sorry for Lexi. She wasn't a cheater until he cheated. THEN she cheated too. HE was the catalyst, and in the process, he shattered Lexi's mind, with a lot of help from her man-hating 'friend'. In her hurt, and desire to 'get even', and lash out, she destroyed herself instead! I doubt she would ever have become a whore, if her husband hadn't set her on her self-destructive path. She became bitter and hateful, as do many cheated upon spouses, only in this case, her friend was just as hateful and broken, so Lexi never moved past the hurt. Her whore friend wouldn't have let her. In the end, her 'revenge' destroyed her instead.

Like I said, I ALMOST feel sorry for her, but she was still well capable of recognizing that she was only hurting herself, and COULD have put a stop to it, but chose not to. She should have just walked away and started over, when she discovered his cheating, instead of trying to hold onto her marriage, while also feeding her need for payback. That's why trying to stay married after infidelity never works. The need to get back is always there, and either you do, and still lose, or you don't, and end up unhappy and resentful anyway. When someone cheats, it's over. Move on and start over, it's the best way in the end, despite what all the do gooders say. Staying just for the sake of it only serves to remind you on a daily basis of the betrayal. Everything else is just lying to yourself.

In the end, as in reality, the cheater that caused the problem walked away unscathed, and won out in the end. He deserved a life as unhappy as Lexi's, but instead got a do-over.

Well balanced tale.

@krossis666 - he tossed a bunker buster into his married life. She tossed a pocket nuke. They both are scarred and will carry them forever. The husband unscathed? Not hardly.

No wimp here. He left her after enough bad. Good for him. Thanks, I was starting to wonder about the authors here.

Michelle? Melissa?

FTDS may have done his best to bring this joke of a LW tale to its sorry end; but I

marvel at how such a storyline could have been thought out at all. The bitch of a slut wife should have been hung up to dry but the husband limped out instead. 3* for FTDS' lame effort and 1* for using up space?

One thing I don't like about this is how the guy texts like a teenage girl.

The messages are short enough that short forms isn't needed.

That much was obvious. But when he has the conversation with Michelle/Melissa and tells her he's "broken" I think she believes him (with some convincing from her Father) and never sees him again. Too much of a reach to have him end up happily married to Michelle/Melissa. Sorry - bad ending.

It would be nice if he texted like a grown man and not a teenage girl.

"I'm turning into something really bad, Tony. Really bad! And I don't know what to do!" – Um, stop?

“It's not over until I say it's over!” – LOL, she can’t force him to stay married, especially when she refuses to act like a married woman.

Assuming all her sex has been unprotected, who knows what diseases she’s picked up?

Yes, he cheated, but as others have said, when the wives here cheat they tell their husbands, "It was just sex, it's YOU I love," and "Get over your fragile male ego"!

Because after catching my own wife and divorcing her, I actually saw her and began to have interaction with her sixteen years later. Jana cheated, I caught and divorced her, then moved away from our hometown. It was my of my coworkers she cheated on me with and I couldn't bear to continue working with him. Yes, I gave him an ass-beating and did a little time in jail for it, but afterward I left.

Sixteen years later, after having zero contact with my wife, I was remarried, children and had to move back. A promotion had me working as a senior VP with my original employer.

By then I was remarried to the girl-next-door type of girl. Katie was the opposite of my first wife, tall, athletic, pretty not beautiful and is truly the love of my life. We met a year after my move, went out for a year before I proposed, then another six months of planning before our marriage. Four years later, we had twin boys and I learned about what it took to be a man with a family that depended on me.

My first wife had been going to college in order to teach. When we married, she decided to be a sit-at-home and fuck other men wife. Of course, I didn't know that until long after the fact. Yet when I returned to my former town, I found she had indeed returned to school and earned her teaching degree. Soon after, she began teaching fourth grade.

When we moved back our boys entered third grade. It didn't take long before I found out through the grapevine my wife was teaching. I, we didn't see her until my boys were playing soccer and Jana was there in the stands, correcting papers and watching the game. She looked older, much older than her years might have indicated.

When she saw my wife and I there, she came over and sat next to us. It was uncomfortable but we all made the best of it. We learned she had never remarried and knew immediately they were my boys, the spitting image of pictures she had seen of me when I was young.

She never said she was sorry for our past, she had already done that during the divorce process. I found out she still lived in our original tiny house and had been teaching for thirteen years and looked forward to having my own boys in her class.

I have to admit, it was gratifying to see her regret, they should have been our children. But I could not have been happier with my wife and new life.

i want a scorched earth ending.

First off, I rated this deservedly 5-stars. Now, the point I am about to make is pointed at the majority of writers...NOT JUST YOU. Melissa suddenly became interchangeable with another character. 90% of authors will list the husband/victim in the first three paragraphs and his name never appears again. In all the conversations and narrative, somehow his name is never mentioned. It is as if he is of no importance. Sometimes the wife's name is erroneously given as another lesser character of the story. Hint: Keep a little notepad with all of the characters and a short description of their status in your story. Make an effort to include the storyteller's name in conversations throughout your story, but especially on the last page. Thank you for letting me rant to all writers.

That said - I hated the ending. He should have folded his tent, taken his playing cards and left the area. No way he goes back to Michelle. Too much water over the bridge. Add to that the fact that her daddy is wealthy and you have the recipe for a disaster. Divorce Lexi for sure. Go back to Michelle? No way in hell.

Everyone is a sick bastard in this dreary hellhole of a story.

And these disgusting drinkers are the bane of any sensible, healthy relationship. Please, all of you alkies, just croak already, would you? You're all worthless, and make horrible protagonists, too.

if Lexi has realized her mistake, broken off with Maria and lived a normal life. In my opinion.

Or if Maria had tried to intervene and get them back together.

Who is Melissa and what happened to Michelle?

Seems there is some name confusion.

As my research has taught me a large number of women who are prostitutes have a permanent sexual relationship with another woman.

"As my research has taught me" An interesting way for the last anon to admit he has to pay for sex a lot.

Just as bad as the original!

It really is best to leave the ex alone like radioactive waste. Well she wasnt very amenable to any sort of reconciliation, she went...fractal. It was good for an alternative ending add-on, but was a little shallow for a story. I would rather see the cheater and their cohort happy and the cheated happy with someone else over reconciliation. It's not likely, but I don't think reconciliation is very worthy either.

My first wife was indeed my soulmate. In a moment of weakness I cheated on her. One single time that lasted less than one hour. But she found out about it and she had zero tolerance for cheating. She would be proud of the faithful man her ex-husband became. But kharma is sick. I have been rewarded for my one moment of infidelity with a string of cheaters. Story here?

Two messed up people, both at fault. Lexi took it way too far. Why do the women in these LW stories always take the revenge to the extreme. Story would have been better with Marie getting messed up a little.

Well done story about the devastation and wreckage this kind of escalation leaves behind. Two absurdly selfish individuals destroying the remnants of a marriage with the equivalent of emotional napalm.

Everybody in this story is fucking nuts

What the fuck happened to Michelle ???? Does he have two wives/women ??? O.K.,I guess. The Bear Is confused.

The BEAR

Again, another one where the payback is deserved, but not happy.

Way over the top as far as the wife is concerned.Could have been good, if it were pulled back a bit.

Good writing. The story is over the top, like many stories in the genre.

I got a kick out of reading the comments. People act like the story was real, or should be realistic. Real life is mundane, which is why I read these stories. I wonder if the commenters think that porn accurately reflects real sex.

Thanks for sharing your ending of this story.

Knowin' you're from west by-gawwwd Texas, I heard the voice, and I swear, that run-down motel was on old highway 80! Great flow, and a perfect way to end this stinker of a story. You're kind of like the Paul Harvey of Literotica: "And, now...for the rest of the story!"

SAd story. I actually didn't like it. As Ted said, he started it all, but he should have left as he should have apologized to Lexi and let Lexi have closure. It was his fault and it got out of hand. Ted should have done more, yes divorce but should have followed up on Lexi after she got out, probably paid for Lexi's therapy and a little alimony/allowance while she recovers herself and made sure to take Maria out of her life. Yes, Ted is a failure and I'm glad he has bouts of guilt throughout his life.

But it was well written as usual by FTDS so I give this a 4 star even if I didn't like it.

cheating is an awful contagious disease.

i resisted the first time....the second time. the third time? i was infected. i was hurt and angry at the world.

i decided 'cheating is just the norm. if i can't beat em'...join em'' so i cheated. i cheated on bad people. i cheated on good people. but i stopped caring. at first i had revenge fantasies about pay back cheating, but i was too forgiving. i should have left, but i didn't. as a result....their illness festered inside me. turned me into a terrible person that cheated...not outta anger...but outta indifference. it was worse.

it took me cheating on a good person to realize i was perpetuating a sickness. i confessed. i took hell for it. but it stopped the sickness in me. hopefully i didn't infect anyone too much. i will never do it again though...because it's not who i was in the past. past me wasn't sick. past me didn't infect others.

if someone cheats on you, or you cheat on them....do the right thing....end the sickness.

You did a great job finishing the story with a great ending. Well done 5 stars

Michelle, or is it Melissa, make your mind up, poor editing spoilt this story

Great save FTDS!!!

In most cases of revenge-cheating, both people lose. The original story was disturbing and the followup more so in a crash-and-burn style. It is still a BTB in a measurable sense, but not as extreme as it could have been.

Nice ending but what's her name; Michelle or Melissa? You change half way through.

You sir, are one of the best. Keep doing what you do! 5 stars

Is it Melissa or Michelle?

ZEROZEROZERO...

WHO THE HELL IS MELISSA?

While it was an ending, it was an ending that destroyed a woman because, in all your stories, women deserve pain and suffering.

I don’t know why you hate women, I really don’t but you need professional help.

I'm usually all for burning, but this story rubbed me the wrong way.

zero, who is Melissa?

Boring

The asshole deserved more pain! He gets to fuck and try to portray himself as a good guy???

Great story

Michelle he went with the woman who fucked up his life geee i wonder if he set it up right from the start he is an idiot

Great Story!! I loved it!!

[01.12.22]

Fun und interesting!

11/10!!!!!